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Mail & Guardian
15-05-2025
- Business
- Mail & Guardian
How to manage money as a couple when you earn differently
Stephanie Ferreira, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions. B y Stephanie Ferreira, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions In many relationships, one partner earns more than the other. One may have taken a career break, started a business, faced retrenchment or simply be in a lower-paying profession. While this is completely normal, it can lead to resentment, guilt or confusion about what feels fair – especially when couples haven't discussed how to manage the imbalance. With the right conversations, it is possible to balance income differences in a way that feels equal, empowering and practical for both partners. The emotional side of earning differently An income gap doesn't just affect the household budget – it can influence how each partner feels, behaves and communicates about money. One partner may feel guilty about spending money they didn't 'earn'. The higher earner may feel burdened by carrying most of the financial responsibility. The lower earner may feel 'less than' – even when contributing in other meaningful ways. These dynamics aren't unusual. But they do highlight the need for honest, structured conversations about money and long-term goals. What feels fair is deeply personal, and there's no one-size-fits-all solution. What matters is that both partners are heard, involved and part of the plan. What couples are doing in practice In my experience as a financial planner, couples manage income differences in various ways. The most common approach is to split joint expenses proportionally to income. If one partner earns more, they contribute more. Whatever's left, each person uses for their own spending or saving. Others prefer a straight 50/50 split, regardless of income. A few pool all their income into a shared account and pay both joint and individual expenses from there. This approach is less common and can be challenging to manage. It often requires careful budgeting and tracking, especially when it comes to things like debit orders, subscriptions or personal spending. On the opposite end, some couples don't know what the other earns – and avoid joint planning altogether. Finding an approach that works for both of you The most successful couples are those who have the conversation, agree on a structure that feels fair and review it regularly. Money is deeply personal, so what feels 'equal' to one couple may not feel that way to another. Start with shared goals Goals are a great way to align your thinking as a couple. Set short, medium and long-term goals together. Before you know it, you'll be talking about what matters most and how you want to prioritise your money. Maybe the focus over the next year is travel and experiences. Or perhaps it's paying off debt, buying a new car or saving for a home. Talk about when you'd like to retire or whether one of you wants to take time off to study or start something new. When both partners feel invested in the plan, money becomes something that brings you together – rather than something that causes stress or conflict. Make the conversations easier Money silence usually leads to money stress. Once your goals are clear, the conversations become easier. You're not just talking about numbers – you're talking about what matters to both of you. Carve out time to discuss any concerns, ensure your spending plan aligns with your goals, agree on how expenses will be split, who's responsible for what and how often you'll check in. A practical tip: Set up a joint card or account for monthly shared expenses like groceries or eating out. Each partner contributes a set amount. It keeps the admin simple – and avoids the ongoing 'whose turn is it?' discussions. Don't attach your worth to your income Earning less (or not at all) doesn't mean contributing less. Raising children, supporting a partner's career or managing the home are all valuable contributions. The way you divide financial responsibilities should reflect that. Even if one partner earns significantly more, managing money should still be a shared responsibility. Ensure both partners have financial security If one partner takes a career break – to raise children, start a new venture or study – consider allocating a portion of savings or investments in their name. Long-term financial security should belong to both partners, not just the higher earner. The same applies if one spouse is earning significantly less. Think long-term and consider how the current arrangement fits into your broader financial picture. When balancing different incomes in a relationship, the most important consideration is to engage in open and honest conversations. You don't need to earn the same to feel like equal partners. When both partners are involved, informed and secure, money becomes something you manage together – not something that comes between you. For more information, visit
Mail & Guardian
24-04-2025
- Business
- Mail & Guardian
Can you afford school fees and retire well?
Jason Appel, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions. B y Jason Appel, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions R2.8 million. That's what it could cost to put one child through 12 years of private school plus three years of tertiary education in South Africa – and that's before factoring in books, uniforms or accommodation. This estimate is based on today's fees, projected to increase by around 6% annually. To cover those costs from investments, you'd need to save approximately R56 500 a year, escalating annually, starting when your child is born. This estimate assumes a 10% annual return on investment. For most families, that's a tall order – especially when you're also trying to save for retirement, pay off a bond and manage rising living costs. No wonder so many parents feel overwhelmed. And when pressure rises, the temptation to make short-term decisions with long-term consequences increases, too. With a clear plan, it's possible to give your children an excellent education and retire well. Start early – but it's never too late If you've just had kids, the time to start planning is now. The sooner you begin, the more time compound growth has to work in your favour. Education costs rise faster than general inflation – at around 6%-10% per year – so it pays to get ahead early. That said, it's never too late to start. Even if your child is already in school, having a plan is always better than not having a plan at all. Think strategically about school choices Not all good education comes with a premium price tag. Some parents choose more affordable public or semi-private schools in the early years and invest more in high school. Others select schools based on values and community fit, not just brand prestige. There are also more education options than ever before. Online and hybrid schooling platforms offer recognised qualifications like CAPS, IEB, Cambridge and GED at significantly lower costs than many traditional private schools. These models can also cut transport, uniform and other costs – making them a viable option for some families. The key is to do your homework. Understand what you're paying for and weigh the return on that investment in terms of your child's needs and your long-term financial well-being. Budget honestly – and with intention No one builds wealth by accident. The first step is facing your numbers – where your money is going and what your priorities are. A good budgeting exercise will reveal your money habits and allow you to realign them. Once you've done this, create a plan that includes monthly contributions to education, retirement and an emergency fund. Don't forget to review your life insurance – if something happens to you, your children's future shouldn't be left to chance. Some insurers include education benefits as part of their life cover. Planning for education takes time, effort and courage, but it's not something you can afford to ignore. If a goal feels out of reach, it's wise to adjust the plan or consider different options. Trying to keep up with the Joneses is exhausting and expensive. Instead, focus on building a plan that works for you – one that's grounded in intention, not comparison. Invest with purpose, not just convenience Simply transferring funds into a savings account isn't always the best move – it's far too tempting to dip into these savings for emergencies. It's preferable to save in an investment product with limited access to protect your long-term goals. The time you have until the money is needed matters. Your investment horizon – how many years you have before school fees or university costs kick in – should guide your investment product and portfolio choice. The longer your timeframe, the more growth potential you can access. A financial planner can help you calculate how much you need to save each month to meet your goal. If the number seems out of reach, you can revisit your spending plan, make small adjustments and start with what you can afford. Increasing your contributions yearly, even slightly, can make a big difference over time. Don't squander windfalls Bonuses, tax refunds and other unexpected income are great opportunities – if you don't spend them before they arrive. Label these for education and other planned expenses. Make this a habit. Many schools offer a discount for term or annual fees paid in advance, and these savings can ease the pinch of rising school fees. Think practically and creatively Sometimes, getting the numbers to work takes more than a spreadsheet. I've seen families scale down to one car and others renting out their homes over the holiday seasons to raise additional funds for school fees. These solutions may not work for everyone, but they show what's possible when mindset meets motivation. This is what financial planning is all about: using what you have to create the life you want. Giving your children the best possible education without sacrificing your retirement dreams is possible and a smart, future-focused goal worth striving for. Speak to a qualified financial planner who can help you build a plan that's realistic, intentional and tailored to your life. The sooner you start, the more options you'll have. For more information, visit
