Latest news with #FriendForward
CBC
03-05-2025
- General
- CBC
As adults, making friends can be challenging. Here are 6 steps to help you find your squad
For adults, making new friends can be an uphill battle. Gone are the default spaces like school, extracurricular clubs or teams, student residence halls and other spots kids, teens and young adults naturally connect and make friends. Adulthood puts up a host of challenges: physical distance from your best buds, for instance, limited time after work, family obligations and the common shrinking of social networks that comes with age. Then there's our growing tendency towards social isolation to consider, as some may simply have been raised to focus on career and family first, leaving friendships a distant concern. It's understandable then that people may come to the sudden realization that years have passed since they've truly connected with friends. So, what's a grown-up seeking a squad or BFF to do? Friendship coach and author Danielle Bayard Jackson, host of the female-focused podcast Friend Forward, and comedian and writer Aaron Karo, host of the male friendship podcast Man of the Year, spoke with Just Asking host Saroja Coelho to share advice about getting started. Don't feel awkward, even if it's been a minute Social circles naturally shift over time — people tend to replace about half their friends over a seven-year period — but even if it's been awhile, don't get bogged down by feeling embarrassed or awkward about it and just reach out, says Karo. "Don't just wait around to get invited. You have to be doing the reaching out," he said from Los Angeles. Flip your perspective When one moves to a new community, the idea of building a completely new social circle from scratch can feel daunting. Jackson encourages ditching the mindset you're starting from behind the curve and opting for a positive one focused on confidence and purpose instead. Kids often bond with classmates, for instance, yet "as an adult, you can choose ... and position yourself more strategically and intentionally to invite like-minded connections into your life," said Jackson. Meet up in-person The COVID-19 pandemic exacerbated some people's already growing proclivity to being homebodies and others have fallen out of practice gathering to socialize with friends. This might be even more pronounced in young adults, for whom isolation may have been part of their formative high school or post-secondary experience. An easy way to get yourself out there? Pick something you already enjoy — working out perhaps, walking the dog, crafting or playing a favourite game — and take it up a notch by finding a way to do that with other people or in public. That might mean, for instance, joining an in-person chess club rather than only playing online matches or practicing yoga with others versus alone. By piggybacking on a preferred pastime, "it doesn't feel like so much of a heavy lift to go out and do all these things," Jackson said from Tampa, Fla. She added that ongoing attendance is key. "If you're going every Tuesday night or every first Thursday of the month, you're seeing the same faces. You're building a rapport and it gives a chance for something to build, as opposed to ... one-off singular events." Be upfront about intentions Conveying an interest to take a relationship further — from work colleague to friend, for example — can prove tricky if prospective pals make assumptions about your intentions. Jackson advises being clear from the get-go that it's friendship you're seeking. "We have permission to tell people up front 'Hey, I like you… I'm trying to be intentional about connecting with new friends in this season of my life,'" she said. "I don't think that makes you desperate. I think that comes across … [like] 'She knows what she wants and is confident.' And there's something about that that's contagious." Proposing a group hang or extending an invite to a potential buddy along with their spouse can also do the trick, adds Karo. When you invite a partner, "there's no danger of it being misinterpreted," he said. "If you invite five people to go for a drink after work, it's pretty clear you're not making a pass at anybody. You're trying to become friends with them." Mining acquaintances is perfectly acceptable Perhaps you've already met and even spent time with someone with friend potential, having met them at a gathering with your spouse or in a wider group. Both Karo and Jackson encourage diving further into those existing connections. "There's no reason why you can't become friends with your wife's friends' husbands," Karo noted. "Choose a couple ... that you actually like and make a plan with them — without the women or without the partners." When the goal is to make friends, Jackson added, who says you must always start at square one with completely new people? "They're already in your life. So how can we build on that?" Made a connection? Follow up and be strategic After a genuine connection, forward momentum is important, according to Karo, though he adds becoming new besties will take time. "If you meet someone that you're interested in romantically, you don't [say] 'I'll talk to them some other time'... You follow up right away," he noted, advising the same should be done with platonic relationships. "It's tough, but we would say dip your toe in the pool slowly. You don't necessarily have to ask them about their deepest, darkest dreams [right away]. You wanna get to know them a little bit first before you dive deep." Also, with time being a limited resource, Jackson favours a strategy of concentrating efforts on those with whom you'd like to deepen your acquaintance. She recommends an approach that includes showing appreciation, reaching out to demonstrate your curiosity about the other person, being open and vulnerable, proving you're reliable and "clocking hours together." For parents especially, having meaningful adult friendships is not only good for the grown-ups, it's healthy modelling for kids, Jackson added.
Yahoo
17-03-2025
- Lifestyle
- Yahoo
Friendships are essential for a happier, healthier life. What do you do when there's conflict?
There's no shortage of advice out there on finding the One — but let's not forget about the other loves of our lives: our friends. Close friendships are essential for a happier, healthier life. Staying connected with your pals isn't just good for your mental health; it also helps you ward off depression, boost your physical health and even help you live longer. And friendship isn't just about having fun together: Friends offer support, shared experiences and a sounding board when we need to unpack life's challenges. They hype us up, dry our tears and remind us that our ex never deserved us in the first place. Yet while our friends may help us through life's problems, we can struggle to navigate challenges in our friendships too. Maybe you're anxiously awaiting that 'Will you be my bridesmaid?' text, only for it to never arrive. Or you're dreading telling your most sensitive friend you can't make their birthday drinks because you're sure they'll take it personally. Or, perhaps, you're getting tired of your friend treating you like their therapist — and you're seriously considering billing them after your next 'session.' If you've ever felt less than awesome about your friendships, the good news is that you're not alone — and there are answers out there. Yahoo Life spoke to friendship experts for some of the most frequently asked questions about our pals. Alexandra Hayes Robinson, writer and host of the advice podcast Hello Hayes Molly Burrets, clinical psychologist specializing in couples therapy and women's mental health Danielle Bayard Jackson, friendship expert and host of the Friend Forward podcast Tori Dunlap, financial expert and author of Financial Feminist Marisa Franco, psychologist and friendship expert Caitlin Begg, a Harvard-trained sociological researcher who focuses on relationships and technology Morgan Cope, assistant professor of psychology at Centre College Jessica Speer, author of BFF or NRF (Not Really Friends)? Alex Alexander, host of the Friendship IRL podcast Have a specific problem? Click on the topic below to jump in. 👰♀️ Weddings and milestone moments 👥 Making new friends … and breaking up with them 😤 Conflict and expectations in friendship 💸 Financial drama 🤖 Technology and friendship 🫠 Tricky dynamics How do I tell a friend I don't want to be in their wedding party? What should I do if a friend I thought I was close to doesn't invite me to their major life event? How do I tell someone who expects to be in my bridal party that they aren't? How close do I need to be to someone to invite them to my wedding? When is it OK to skip a friend's birthday party? What's the best way to make friends as a busy parent? When is it time to say goodbye to a friendship? How can you politely indicate you're not interested in continuing a friendship? Should you ever ghost a friend, or is it best to always have honest conversations about your issues? How do I deal with a clingy friend? How do I maintain boundaries when a friend is overly dependent on me? How do I know when to be honest and bring up a conflict with a friend — and when I should just let it go? What do I do if my friend is treating me like their therapist and always venting to me? How do I cope with a friend who is too critical? What do I do if I learn a friend is talking behind my back? When is it OK to tell a little white lie to a friend — like, say, when they ask whether I like their outfit? How do I deal when a friend never pays me back? How do I say 'no' to lending a friend a personal item? What's the best way to handle being on a different financial level than my friends, especially when it comes to taking trips or sharing social experiences? Can I actually be friends with a chatbot? Can you maintain a real friendship exclusively through technology, such as email or text? If a friend expects to be in constant contact with me over text, how do I handle setting boundaries? Can I say something if I don't like my friend's romantic partner? Can I ask a friend to hang out solo if I met them through another friend? How do I handle feeling like a third wheel in a friendship? When can I stay friends with my friend's ex? These responses have been edited for clarity and length.
Yahoo
17-03-2025
- Lifestyle
- Yahoo
Friendships are essential for a happier, healthier life. What do you do when there's conflict?
There's no shortage of advice out there on finding the One — but let's not forget about the other loves of our lives: our friends. Close friendships are essential for a happier, healthier life. Staying connected with your pals isn't just good for your mental health; it also helps you ward off depression, boost your physical health and even help you live longer. And friendship isn't just about having fun together: Friends offer support, shared experiences and a sounding board when we need to unpack life's challenges. They hype us up, dry our tears and remind us that our ex never deserved us in the first place. Yet while our friends may help us through life's problems, we can struggle to navigate challenges in our friendships too. Maybe you're anxiously awaiting that 'Will you be my bridesmaid?' text, only for it to never arrive. Or you're dreading telling your most sensitive friend you can't make their birthday drinks because you're sure they'll take it personally. Or, perhaps, you're getting tired of your friend treating you like their therapist — and you're seriously considering billing them after your next 'session.' If you've ever felt less than awesome about your friendships, the good news is that you're not alone — and there are answers out there. Yahoo Life spoke to friendship experts for some of the most frequently asked questions about our pals. Alexandra Hayes Robinson, writer and host of the advice podcast Hello Hayes Molly Burrets, clinical psychologist specializing in couples therapy and women's mental health Danielle Bayard Jackson, friendship expert and host of the Friend Forward podcast Tori Dunlap, financial expert and author of Financial Feminist Marisa Franco, psychologist and friendship expert Caitlin Begg, a Harvard-trained sociological researcher who focuses on relationships and technology Morgan Cope, assistant professor of psychology at Centre College Jessica Speer, author of BFF or NRF (Not Really Friends)? Alex Alexander, host of the Friendship IRL podcast Have a specific problem? Click on the topic below to jump in. 👰♀️ Weddings and milestone moments 👥 Making new friends … and breaking up with them 😤 Conflict and expectations in friendship 💸 Financial drama 🤖 Technology and friendship 🫠 Tricky dynamics How do I tell a friend I don't want to be in their wedding party? What should I do if a friend I thought I was close to doesn't invite me to their major life event? How do I tell someone who expects to be in my bridal party that they aren't? How close do I need to be to someone to invite them to my wedding? When is it OK to skip a friend's birthday party? What's the best way to make friends as a busy parent? When is it time to say goodbye to a friendship? How can you politely indicate you're not interested in continuing a friendship? Should you ever ghost a friend, or is it best to always have honest conversations about your issues? How do I deal with a clingy friend? How do I maintain boundaries when a friend is overly dependent on me? How do I know when to be honest and bring up a conflict with a friend — and when I should just let it go? What do I do if my friend is treating me like their therapist and always venting to me? How do I cope with a friend who is too critical? What do I do if I learn a friend is talking behind my back? When is it OK to tell a little white lie to a friend — like, say, when they ask whether I like their outfit? How do I deal when a friend never pays me back? How do I say 'no' to lending a friend a personal item? What's the best way to handle being on a different financial level than my friends, especially when it comes to taking trips or sharing social experiences? Can I actually be friends with a chatbot? Can you maintain a real friendship exclusively through technology, such as email or text? If a friend expects to be in constant contact with me over text, how do I handle setting boundaries? Can I say something if I don't like my friend's romantic partner? Can I ask a friend to hang out solo if I met them through another friend? How do I handle feeling like a third wheel in a friendship? When can I stay friends with my friend's ex? These responses have been edited for clarity and length.
