3 days ago
The Importance Of Listening As A Leadership Skill
Heather Heefner is the owner of Dart Communication. She is a communication expert and leadership coach.
The most expensive leadership mistake isn't a bad strategic decision—it's failing to listen effectively. Harvard Business School reports that when employees feel genuinely heard at work, they experience greater internal motivation, increased creativity and stronger engagement. Yet most leaders retain only a fraction of what they hear in conversations, missing critical insights, early warnings and breakthrough ideas flowing through their organizations daily. While everyone focuses on speaking more persuasively, the real competitive advantage comes from listening more effectively.
Google's extensive research on team effectiveness found that psychological safety—the belief that one can speak up without fear of negative consequences—was the number one predictor of high-performing teams. And psychological safety begins with leaders who actually listen. In my practice of communication coaching and consulting, I've observed that the most effective leaders listen differently than their peers. They don't just listen for information—they listen for understanding. They don't just listen with their ears—they listen with their full attention. And they don't just listen to confirm what they already believe—they listen to discover what they don't yet know.
4 Levels Of Listening That Every Leader Must Master
Not all listening is created equal. Understanding these four levels will help you recognize where you currently operate and where you need to go:
This is pretend listening—when you're physically present but mentally elsewhere. You might nod and say "uh-huh," but you're actually thinking about your response, your next meeting or that urgent email. Your team can always tell when you're not really there, which erodes trust and pushes conversations into unproductive territory.
At this level, you're engaged enough to respond appropriately. You follow the conversation thread and can ask relevant questions. This is the minimum acceptable standard for professional interactions, but it doesn't create conditions for breakthrough insights or a deep connection.
Here, you're fully present and focused on understanding both content and emotion. You ask clarifying questions, paraphrase to confirm understanding and notice nonverbal cues. This level demonstrates respect and builds trust, and it's where most effective leaders consistently operate.
The highest form of listening goes beyond understanding what is said to sensing what wants to emerge. You listen with such presence and openness that you create space for new possibilities. You hear not just words but underlying needs, values and aspirations. This is where innovation happens and conflicts transform into collaboration. Most leaders operate at levels 1 and 2 most of the time. The challenge is consistently practicing levels 3 and 4, especially in high-stakes situations.
3 Practices That Transform Your Listening Effectiveness
Based on my work with leaders across industries, here are the three most impactful practices for elevating your listening:
Before important conversations, take a moment to clear your mind and set an intention to be fully present. A simple practice: Take three deep breaths, let go of distractions with each exhale and silently commit to listening with both attention and curiosity. I worked with a CEO who began each meeting with 30 seconds of silence—a micro-meditation that helped everyone transition from previous activities and become fully present. The impact on dialogue quality was remarkable. Team members reported feeling more valued, decisions became more aligned and meetings became shorter because the quality of listening improved.
One of the biggest barriers to effective listening is our tendency to evaluate what's being said—to mentally categorize it as right or wrong, useful or irrelevant, aligned with our views or opposed to them. Practice suspending judgment and listening instead for understanding. Your goal isn't to agree or disagree but to fully comprehend the other person's perspective—their reasoning, their concerns, their hopes. This doesn't mean you'll ultimately agree, but understanding must precede evaluation.
A manager I coached was struggling with what she called a "difficult" employee. When she set aside her assumptions and listened with genuine curiosity, she discovered the underlying concerns driving the behavior. What seemed like resistance was actually valuable insight about process inefficiencies that, once addressed, improved the entire team's performance.
The questions you ask reveal the quality of your listening. Surface-level listening produces surface-level questions. Deep listening enables questions that open new possibilities: "What's at the heart of this issue for you?" "How does this connect to what matters most for our customers?" "What's possible here that we haven't considered yet?" "What would make this a win for everyone involved?"
These questions demonstrate that you've listened deeply enough to move the conversation forward in meaningful ways. An executive I worked with was known for his brilliant but overwhelming communication style. When he learned to listen first and ask generative questions, his influence dramatically increased because his ideas were better received and more readily implemented.
The Competitive Advantage Of Deep Listening
I've seen the transformative impact of deep listening in countless leadership situations: Teams that were deeply divided on strategic direction found common ground when their leader created space for each perspective to be fully heard without judgment. Executives who shifted from speaking to listening became catalysts for breakthrough results and stronger relationships. In a world where everyone is talking, the ability to truly listen has become a rare and valuable leadership skill that creates a competitive advantage for both you and your organization.
Your Next Step
Choose one upcoming important conversation this week. Before it begins, take three deep breaths and commit to listening for understanding rather than agreement. Notice what you learn that surprises you. That single shift—from speaking to listening—might be the catalyst for your next breakthrough as a leader. Remember: While others are focused on being heard, exceptional leaders focus on hearing others. That's where real influence begins.
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