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Irish Independent
01-08-2025
- Entertainment
- Irish Independent
‘I remember Bono warning me not to touch cocaine – but it was too late': Anthony Kavanagh on addiction, Stephen Gately and hiding his sexuality
It was the late 90s, by which point the Manchester-born singer had released two albums and enjoyed a run of chart singles, including the top 10 hit, I Can Make You Feel Good. 'I don't know how I ended up in there, but I somehow did,' Kavanagh says. 'I thought I was a man of the world and I was only about 19. But I do remember him quite seriously saying to me, 'whatever you do Kavana, don't do cocaine'. 'Unfortunately, in that moment in time, it was a little too late for that, but I was like a deer in the headlights going, 'yes sir'.' It should have been different. Achieving his teenage dreams of appearing on Top of the Pops and gracing the cover of Smash Hits, Kavanagh (47) moved to Los Angeles and turned his hand to acting in 2001 when he was dropped from his record label, Virgin. Yet, as he points out in his memoir Pop Scars, life after 90s pop stardom had no shortage of dark, low moments. He lays many of the dizzying highs and hellish lows out in the book in arrestingly vivid detail, often with a side helping of gallows humour. He opens with the moment where he wakes up in a stranger's apartment, having just been paid for sex. There are the lows of alcoholism and drug addiction. There was the moment where he met a homeless woman and ended up smoking crack in a skip in Hackney with her, later giving her his bank card and PIN number to score more drugs. In among the pop anecdotes are poignant passages about loss, bereavement and rehab. And then, there was one of his lowest points. 'I do remember coming back from America and I just couldn't put the payments on my parents' house anymore, which I take full responsibility for,' he says. They were in their 70s and I had to move them and it was the most gutting feeling 'I was living pillar to post, staying with friends, trying to get another comeback going, and I remember going to a phone box and phoning my mum and dad to tell them that we're going to lose the house, basically, and then walking around in circles, wondering how the hell it's come to this. They were in their 70s and I had to move them and it was the most gutting feeling.' Kavanagh's father was from Crumlin. He moved to Manchester as a young man and brought the best of his homeland with him. 'I've always felt more Irish than English, to be honest with you. Oddly, I didn't go to Dublin until I'd started my pop career, but you just feel a connection, don't you?' he says. He talks of a number of beloved aunties and cousins, one of whom gave him his first piano. In the Kavanagh household, Irish TV and radio were on daily, making the moment when he was asked to appear on The Late Late Show all the sweeter. 'He [his dad] was very proud when I was asked to go on that show,' Kavanagh says, adding that Gay Byrne was the show's master of ceremonies at the time. 'I remember the guests and his charm and his humour – he was a real character.' Growing up in working-class Moston, Kavanagh, a strange mix of introvert and extrovert, believed he would be a popstar. With his pin-up looks and telegenic presence, it didn't take long for people to take notice. Asked to support Boyzone on tour in 1996, he recalls meeting the band and noting that they felt like home, with their accents and humour. Ronan Keating was the apparent frontman ('He gets a pass to be a little more sure of himself'), while Kavanagh got on well with Keith Duffy ('an open book and a whole lot of fun') and Shane ('a rogue of a man with a laid-back vibe about him'). Mikey Graham was a little more serious and quieter than the others, yet Kavanagh was instantly smitten by Stephen Gately. Tentatively, they both realised, without talking too much about it, that the other was gay, yet closeted in the pop world, and they enjoyed a brief fling on the tour, in a moment that Kavanagh described in Pop Scars as 'a glimpse of what innocent, real, genuine connection with another feels like'. 'The exciting thing about being on tour was being suddenly around loads of people and you can get a bit disguised in it all,' he says. 'You'd be doing your sound check and you'd pass each other. [Boyzone would] be very busy because they were big stars, but you'd have a little chat with Stephen and get these little flutters where you think, 'oh God, I wish I could say something'. I remember being a bit crestfallen, especially when the tour finished... and the sadness of not being around this person all the time 'It sounds a bit corny, but I suddenly felt there was someone else like me. And not only that, but I think he likes me too... You know when you get that first rush of attraction with somebody and it's mutual? And I think because there was an element of being secretive, there's that as well. 'We know he went on to find true love and get married, but it was my first experience of navigating relationships, texting and boundaries and, 'do I text straight back?'.' Owing mainly to busy schedules and globetrotting, their connection was short-lived. 'I remember being a bit crestfallen, especially when the tour finished, because of the sadness of the tour ending and then the sadness of not being around this person all the time, but you're whisked away and on to the next thing.' Kavanagh recalls the moment when he found out Gately had died in 2009 at the age of 33. 'It was a complete shock. The first time I'd experienced the death of someone that I knew that wasn't a family member,' he says. 'I still can't quite believe it, to be honest.' Kavanagh does recall how both he and Gately – and doubtless some others worried about revealing their sexuality – would politely dodge the girlfriend question, or talk on autopilot about the women they fancied when asked by journalists. Mainly, Kavanagh worried about what his fanbase might think if he wasn't straight. Alcohol and drugs loomed large as a means of comfort, of escape. 'Once you start [that], you collude in the lie,' he says. 'You've made your bed, now you've got to lay in it. And it kind of gets a bit awkward. You'd be racking your brains trying to answer. I loved girls, but I didn't understand what it was like to be sexually attracted to one.' He recalls hanging out with the Spice Girls and being 'terrified' they would realise he was gay. He laughs a little at the times he had to mask his sexuality around his pop peers. 'Some of the other pop lads backstage would be all, 'Oh, she's really sexy', and we'd go, 'Really? That's not what we'd say. We prefer her over there'.' These days, Kavanagh is enjoying chatting to journalists about his book, enthused about writing about his addiction from the other side. He feels creatively invigorated and back in the proverbial swing of things. In my day, there was no social media, no camera phones – who knows what that would have been like He is now sober three years and is excited once again about meetings and opportunities. The pop industry is a very different beast, for any number of reasons, since Kavanagh's heyday. Supports for mental health and addiction are offered and pop stars can build their own audiences on social media. Pop's dream factory still has a tendency to spit its players back out on to the street, but it's not quite as vicious a machine as it once was. 'In my day, there was no social media, no camera phones – who knows what that would have been like,' he says. 'Then, it was very much, meet the manager, go to the record label, get the deal. Now, everyone can be famous from their living room. 'I remember hanging out with a woman, some player in the music business, and she once said to me, 'remember, it's called the music business, not the music friendship'. I'll never forget that.' 'Pop Scars' by Anthony Kavanagh is out now via Bonnier books.


Scottish Sun
11-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Scottish Sun
I was a 90s heart-throb who partied with Spice Girls & Playboy bunnies but ended up homeless & smoking crack in a skip
IN the Nineties, pop star Kavana had dreams of becoming the next big superstar in music. But the I Can Make You Feel Good singer had a dramatic fall from grace when he was unable to curb his booze addiction and keep a lid on his drug-taking. 10 Former Nineties icon Kavana has opened up about the dark side of fame and addiction Credit: Alamy 10 The Manchester-born singer burst on to the scene, partying with the Spice Girls Credit: Supplied 10 Kavana pictured after getting sober in 2023 Credit: X He was also forced to hide his homosexuality over fears his female fans would desert him. Now


The Irish Sun
11-07-2025
- Entertainment
- The Irish Sun
I was a 90s heart-throb who partied with Spice Girls & Playboy bunnies but ended up homeless & smoking crack in a skip
IN the Nineties, pop star Kavana had dreams of becoming the next big superstar in music. But the I Can Make You Feel Good singer had a dramatic fall from grace when he was unable to curb his booze addiction and keep a lid on his drug-taking. Advertisement 10 Former Nineties icon Kavana has opened up about the dark side of fame and addiction Credit: Alamy 10 The Manchester-born singer burst on to the scene, partying with the Spice Girls Credit: Supplied 10 Kavana pictured after getting sober in 2023 Credit: X He was also forced to hide his homosexuality over fears his female fans would desert him. Now 47 and finally sober, Advertisement And he leaves no stone unturned. From his unexpected friendship with Kavana says: 'If only people knew this happy-go-lucky pop star who sings about making them feel good, actually feels the complete opposite.' The Manchester-born singer burst on to the scene, partying with the Spice Girls, Steps, Peter Andre and Boyzone among others. Other than a brief stint at McDonald's — where he was fired for stealing a Filet-O-Fish — being a pop star was the only job he'd had. Advertisement And he had all the credentials for it — good looks, a great voice and an impeccably groomed curtains hairdo. Kavana was signed to a record label in his teens, learning the ropes as a tea boy, before finally landing a deal. He was soon joining Boyzone on the Smash Hits tour and it wasn't long before he realised the Guinness-drinking Irish boys were lightweight partiers compared to him. I was a Noughties popstar who couldn't go 20mins without a drink - now I'm sober with a new career At one point, Ronan Keating had to tell him his nose had started bleeding during a post-gig booze-up, sparking a mad dash to the toilets. Kavana recalls in his memoir: 'The taste of metal and cocaine and possibly baby powder drips down my throat. I've overdone it again. I simply don't know when to stop lately. Advertisement 'Greedy cocaine mouse' 'When others decide they've had enough and want to call it a night I go back to my room and feel the need to carry on. 'I saw a documentary on lab mice being fed the stuff once and they kept going back for more. Little scurrying mice, all jittery and riddled with nerves. 'Tiny claws scratching against the ground. That's me. A greedy cocaine mouse. I splash my face with water and wipe any remnants of blood away from my nose. 'I wet a bit of toilet paper, roll it into a ball and put it up the nostril, stuffing it just far up enough to stop the drip and leave it lodged in. 'I'll have to make do with breathing out of one nostril for now. Charming.' Advertisement Having a cocaine-induced nose bleed in front of Ronan wasn't a good look, especially as he and Ronan's bandmate Stephen Gately — affectionately known as 'Steo' — had eyes for each other. But it would lead to a sweet romance. He writes: 'I've still got the ball of tissue shoved up my nostril but I have somehow forgotten about what happened pre-Steo arriving and am feeling calm and relaxed. 10 Kavana was forced to hide his homosexuality over fears his female fans would desert him Credit: Getty 10 Kavana, pictured with Mel C, had a dramatic fall from grace Credit: News Group Newspapers Ltd Advertisement ''I think I'll call it a night, lads,' says Ronan, with a genuine yawn. I'm not tired and it's nothing to do with the drugs that have by now thankfully worn off and been replaced with the tranquilising effects of the alcohol and Stephen's presence. "I'd normally be shy and nervous around someone I fancied but it wasn't like that with him. 'It's late. I'll probably go to bed too,' says Stephen, making me wonder if our deep connection is all in my head. 'I say nothing and leave the bar with the others. All three of us get in the lift. Ronan's room is on the same floor as Stephen's and without saying a word I get out with them on their floor, despite my own room being two floors up. I've no idea what I'm doing but my feet keep moving towards wherever Stephen is going, while Ronan walks ahead. 'I don't want the night to end and I've never been so determined for it not to. Stephen keeps talking while we walk towards his room, almost like it's some unspoken agreement we want to be alone together. ' 'Goodnight, lads,' says Ronan, which feels like his way of saying, 'It's OK with me'. Advertisement 'Hugs all round and it's finally just me and Stephen standing outside his room. He puts his key card in the door and we go in. 'I don't sleep in my hotel-room bed that night, and I get a glimpse of what innocent, real, genuine connection with another feels like.' The taste of metal and cocaine and possibly baby powder drips down my throat. I've overdone it again. I simply don't know when to stop lately. Such was his desire to hit the hard stuff, Kavana moved away from socialising with pop stars in favour of trendier company at London's notorious Nineties hotspot the Met Bar, populated by the Cool Britannia crowd. But he says: 'There's only so many parties or nights out at the Met Bar one can have without feeling like your soul is being sucked out, along with your wallet. 'A night out for me could end up going a multitude of ways depending on the company I keep, and lately I seem to be drawn to those who lean towards the non-stop partying type of evening, which are usually dressed up to begin with as, 'Let's have dinner at Nobu'. Advertisement 'I don't even like sushi, but sitting in a restaurant a few feet away from one of the Gallaghers or Kate Moss, in the desperate hope I also get invited to the inner sanctum of Cool Britannia does wonders for the ego. 'Not so much when you're back in your hotel room watching the ceiling with the birds tweeting, with a paranoid coked-up empty soul and wallet to go with it. 'Maybe one day I will get invited to Supernova Heights [Noel's former home in Camden] once I become pals with them. I just need to prove that there's more to me than what they think. Plus, I am also a northerner so surely we would get on like a house on fire, hopefully in Noel's £5million one in Belsize Park.' By this point Kavana's hits were drying up. In fact, new stars were pushing him down the pecking order when it came to bagging the cover of Smash Hits or Big magazine. 'Ecstasy in hot tubs' So he tried his luck in Los Angeles as a songwriter, a move made more tempting by the fact he could go under the radar over there. Advertisement This led to Manchester . He recalls leaving his pals 'open-mouthed' by his 'Hollywood escapades', including 'partying at the Playboy mansion where I did too much coke and had to be hosed down in a gold shower room by one of Mr Hefner's Playboy bunnies . . . or the wild parties I get invited to in the Hollywood Hills at movie producers' houses, necking ecstasy in hot tubs with A-listers and their hangers-on. "What I don't report back, though, is how lonely I'm starting to feel and that I'm worried I may have made a mistake but am too caught up in the whirlwind of it all to come home. 'Or that when I'm not partying with whichever new group of Hollywood 'friends' I've met randomly in the VIP of my locals, The Standard or The Viper Room, I'm usually on a comedown, eating pizza while watching The Tonight Show and feeling sad that I'm nowhere near getting to be on there myself.' It was in LA where his drugs and boozing hit new depths of despair. Advertisement He was lured on to crystal meth, and while staying with a sober pal in a booze-free house, he raided the bathroom cupboard and downed a bottle of Joop aftershave 10 Kavana, pictured with Dannii Minogue, has documented his journey from the Smash Hits Poll Winners Party to the Woolworths bargain bin in a new autobiography Credit: Alamy 10 Kavana on TV's Grease Is The Word in 2007 Credit: check copyright 10 Kavana also appeared in Celebrity Big Brother in 2015 Credit: Rex Features He says: 'Typically, it had to be the most pungent, campest of scents and the one you can smell a mile away. Still, beggars can't be choosers. The purple bottle stares at me like it knows exactly what kind of desperate low I've now sunk to. Advertisement 'Fingers shaking as I unscrew the cap, the sickly sweet scent hitting my nostrils. 'It's disgusting, but I'm too far gone to care. I wait for a second, imagining how this would look in a movie: The tragic alcoholic downing aftershave in a posh LA bathroom. 'I laugh at my reflection, what a joke — except the punchline is my life. 'The taste is beyond description, like someone's melted a plastic Christmas tree with battery acid and marzipan. 'Immediately I gag, my body repulsed against yet another foreign liquid, but I force it down. Advertisement 'One gulp. Two. I can't do a third. It burns all the way down to my stomach.' Kavana returned to the UK in the hope of sparking a music comeback. He starred in ITV talent show Grease Is The Word (designed to find the next Danny Zuko for the West End version of Grease). This led to the disastrous Loose Women appearance where he was so intoxicated his agent was told afterwards he was 'banned for life'. There was also a stint in Panto in Milton Keynes in 2009, playing Prince Charming in Cinderella alongside TV favourites Anthea Turner and Bobby Davro. He was supported by friend Amy Winehouse , who he had recently reacquainted with — plus two random women she had just met in a nearby KFC . 10 Kavana starred on The Big Reunion in 2013 Credit: Shutterstock Editorial Advertisement 10 Pop Scars by Anthony Kavanagh (Blink, £16.99) is out on Thursday Credit: supplied Unsurprisingly, the trio were kicked out by security during the second half of the show after numerous Amy outbursts, including 'Oi, you two ugly sisters are bitches'. He also appeared in Celebrity Big Brother in 2015. But after Kavana's dad passed away with cancer, he lived with his mum, who was battling dementia — a far cry from his old life in fancy London hotels when he was labelled pop's next big thing. Summing up his life at that point, he says: 'I tell myself, blissfully unaware of the desperate reality, that's it's perfectly normal for a man my age with no job and an escalating drink problem to be secretly living in an old people's sheltered housing complex with his mother.' Advertisement Much later, Kavana would tell a rehab group his final almighty binge 'culminated in me smoking crack in a skip with a homeless lady who I bonded with then trusted with my Monzo card to go buy more drugs and who never returned.' But by becoming sober, moving out and writing his new autobiography, it's clear he has now turned a corner. Pop Scars by Anthony Kavanagh (Blink, £16.99) is out on Thursday.


Daily Record
31-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Record
90s pop star warns celebs to be 'very afraid' ahead of autobiography release
Celebrity Big Brother contestant Kavana says he was 'broken by addiction' as he opens up in his upcoming book. The pop star of the nineties, Anthony Kavanagh, is warning celebs to be 'very afraid' ahead of the release of his autobiography. More well known by his stage name Kavana, the 47-year-old became a pop sensation with hits such as I Can Make You Feel Good, MFEO and Crazy Chance. Anthony is set to release his explosive memoir - Pop Scars - in July, in which he has promised to tell all about his experiences in the limelight. While talking about his battles with addiction, the singer is also said to lift the lid on the supposedly 'innocent' 90s pop scene. Nearly three decades ago, Anthony graced the covers of teen pop magazines, including Smash Hits, as a bright-eyed 20-year old. However, since then, he has been candid about his addiction problems over the years, reports the Mirror. For example, last year he shared a post on Instagram that included before and after photos of his recovery battle, along with the caption: "Recovery is possible." He has also spoken about his drastic change in appearance compared to how he looked a year and half prior, when he was in one of his lowest states, and what steps he had taken to get help. In the comments, he wrote: "On #addictionawarenessweek I want to make anyone struggling aware that recovery is possible. 20 months ago I was lost, broken and hopeless. Ask for help, I'm so glad I did." Many of his celebrity pals flooded the comments with encouraging messages, including former Bad Boys Inc singer Matthew Pateman who said: "Proud of you." Steps' H Watkins also added a heartfelt "Proud friend", while 911's Lee Brennan wrote: "Superstar". While he has many friends who support him, with the upcoming release of his 'explosive' book, some of his friends and acquaintances may be in for a surprise. Speaking to Attitude magazine back in 2017, Anthony promised that he would write an exposing memoir about his experience in the music industry. He said: "I am very excited about it. It's more of a memoir, I'll save the autobiography for when I'm older. It'll be warts [and all] and recalls what was happening back in the pop industry back in the 90s and when I went to live in Hollywood. "There are some really outrageous stories that most people wouldn't know about. Yes, people should be afraid…very afraid." The former star has since promoted his book on his Instagram, claiming that it is "for the underdog". Posting a picture of the front cover that shows an image of Kavana back in the 90s, he said: "Can't believe I'm saying this but I actually wrote a book. "Like by myself, like those grown ups do. POP SCARS covers all things 90s pop but more importantly what happens AFTER fame." He continued: "It's about teenage fame, loss, addiction and hope, and how not to iron a white Kappa tracksuit. It's been described as 'Laugh out loud, jaw dropping, and heartfelt' but you can decide that. Come join the ride with me. More news to come. This is for the underdog." Kavana didn't disappear after his pop career ended, as he remained in the spotlight through a variety of television appearances. This includes starring in Hollyoaks: In the City in 2006, being a finalist on TV competition Grease Is the Word in 2007, auditioning for The Voice in 2014 and coming seventh in Celebrity Big Brother in 2015. In 2014, the star came out as gay as he revealed a past secret romance with Boyzone's Stephen Gately. However, his battle with addiction followed as he confessed to feeling "guilty and sick" about his relapse. Join the Daily Record WhatsApp community! Get the latest news sent straight to your messages by joining our WhatsApp community today. You'll receive daily updates on breaking news as well as the top headlines across Scotland. No one will be able to see who is signed up and no one can send messages except the Daily Record team. All you have to do is click here if you're on mobile, select 'Join Community' and you're in! If you're on a desktop, simply scan the QR code above with your phone and click 'Join Community'. We also treat our community members to special offers, promotions, and adverts from us and our partners. If you don't like our community, you can check out any time you like. To leave our community click on the name at the top of your screen and choose 'exit group'. If you're curious, you can read our Privacy Notice. He said: "Ok. I think it's important for me to be transparent about my recovery. I relapsed after 100 days of sobriety. I feel guilty and sick and I hate myself after letting the people I love down. I thought I knew better. I have to start again."


Daily Mirror
31-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mirror
90s pop star 'broken by addiction' warns celebs to be 'very afraid' over exposé
Former 90s pop star and Celebrity Big Brother contestant Kavana has been very candid about his addiction battles, but now he's promised to be honest over his heyday experiences too Nineties pop sensation Anthony Kavanagh warned celebs to be 'very afraid' over his upcoming autobiography. The now-47 year old singer who had a string of hits including I Can Make You Feel Good, Crazy Chance and MFEO using the stage name Kavana, made the threat prior to the release of his explosive memoir, Pop Scars, which he's promising will tell all about his experience with fame. The singer has been candid about his battles with addiction since hitting the spotlight as a fresh-faced 20 year old nearly three decades ago, when he graced the covers of teen pop magazines including Smash Hits. Last year, he candidly shared on Instagram a before-and-after photo that illustrated his journey from a dark place last year to a successful recovery, along with an encouraging caption for his fans: "Recovery is possible." He spoke about how vastly different he looked compared to one and a half years previously, when he was at a low ebb, and explained how he'd taken steps to get help. Leaving a powerful comment with his images, he said: "On #addictionawarenessweek I want to make anyone struggling aware that recovery is possible. 20 months ago I was lost, broken and hopeless. Ask for help, I'm so glad I did." Celebrity pals rallied around with messages of encouragement, including former Bad Boys Inc singer Matthew Pateman who declared, "Proud of you," while Steps' H Watkins chimed in with a heartfelt, "Proud friend," and 911's Lee Brennan added: "Superstar." But with the release of the book , some of his friends and acquaintances in the industry could be in for a shock. Back in 2017, Anthony spoke to Attitude magazine and promised that he'd write a revealing memoir about his time in the music industry, to lift the lid on the wild goings on of the seemingly-innocent 90s pop scene. He told the publication: "I am very excited about it. It's more of a memoir, I'll save the autobiography for when I'm older. It'll be warts [and all] and recalls what was happening back in the pop industry back in the 90s and when I went to live in Hollywood. There are some really outrageous stories that most people wouldn't know about. Yes, people should be afraid…very afraid." And it seems the former idol is excited about what's to come, as he recently promoted the book on his Instagram page. Alongside a shot of its cover, featuring an image of Kavana at the height of his success, he said: "Can't believe I'm saying this but I actually wrote a book. Like by myself, like those grown ups do. POP SCARS covers all things 90s pop but more importantly what happens AFTER fame." And he continued: "It's about teenage fame, loss, addiction and hope, and how not to iron a white Kappa tracksuit. It's been described as 'Laugh out loud, jaw dropping, and heartfelt' but you can decide that. Come join the ride with me. More news to come. This is for the underdog." After his pop career ended, Anthony stayed in the spotlight, going on to star in Hollyoaks: In The City in 2006, before becoming a finalist on the TV competition Grease Is the Word in 2007, auditioning for The Voice on ITV and finishing seventh on Celebrity Big Brother in 2015. He later revealed a 12-month stalking hell. He also came out as gay in 2014, revealing a past secret romance with Stephen Gately from Boyzone. But his addiction battle followed, with Anthony previously confessing he felt "guilty and sick" for relapsing, saying: "Ok. I think it's important for me to be transparent about my recovery. I relapsed after 100 days of sobriety. I feel guilty and sick and I hate myself after letting the people I love down. I thought I knew better. I have to start again."