Latest news with #JoHayes
Newsweek
22-05-2025
- Newsweek
Fury As Parents Try To Underpay Sitter Because Baby Slept Most of the Time
Based on facts, either observed and verified firsthand by the reporter, or reported and verified from knowledgeable sources. Newsweek AI is in beta. Translations may contain inaccuracies—please refer to the original content. Internet users have backed a babysitter who was paid for just an hour of her shift because the toddler slept almost the entire time she was there. Etiquette expert Jo Hayes, of told Newsweek she was "appalled" at how the parents acted. A 19-year-old woman, who did not give her name but posts to Reddit under the username u/SecretiveGurl, took to the r/AmITheJerk sub on May 21 where she explained what happened. Asking if she was in the wrong for feeling "taken advantage of" in the situation, she said she occasionally babysits for a "nice" couple in the neighborhood, with their "sweet" 2-year-old usually making it an "easy gig." Recently, however, she was booked for 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. as the parents went out for dinner, and just 20 minutes in, the toddler fell asleep. The sitter "didn't hear a peep" for the rest of the night, and while she regularly checked the baby monitor, she just relaxed until the parents came home—and that was when they said they should only pay her for 20 minutes of work. The babysitter laughed at first, thinking it was a joke, but then the parents gave her money for one hour's worth of work, and told her they "feel weird paying full price when you didn't really do anything." And the sitter tried to object, saying that she was still there to look out for the baby while the parents enjoyed their night out. However, they "didn't budge" and instead promised to make it up to her "next time." "I didn't argue further because I didn't want to cause a scene," the sitter wrote. However, after her sister heard what happened and said the parents were "being cheap," it left her wondering if she was right or wrong for expecting full pay. Hayes told Newsweek, speaking directly to the teenager in the center of the story: "If I was your mother, I would march you right over to that house, and speak on your behalf—having you there as witness to learn how to deal with this sort of thing—politely requesting that the parents pay you your full wage." Hayes said that "whether the toddler was asleep or not, you invested your night sitting in their home, when you could have been doing many other things. "If the toddler woke up, who would have been in charge? You. You were on duty, and deserve your full pay." Internet users also weighed in with fury, awarding her post more than 21,000 upvotes, as one commenter wrote: "Hell no. You're paid to watch the baby. Not for what the baby does." Stock image: A woman holds a baby, both facing away from the camera. Stock image: A woman holds a baby, both facing away from the said she should suggest to the parents: "Cool, next time the baby falls asleep I can leave then?" A third advised the sitter to "never go back, and tell everyone what they did so no one else gets scammed by these people." "You spent four hours with the baby so they still need to pay you full," one comment read. "You should demand the rest of the pay. That's just crazy." The babysitter said in a comment that, while she likes the toddler, after what the parents did, she will not be returning to babysit again. Hayes added: "This girl was definitely taken advantage of, and I encourage her to go back to these parents, and request or demand—kindly, calmly, but clearly—the rest of her deserved pay. "You deserve this. Not only will it feel good to get the rest of the money owed, but you'll feel more confident about standing up to other people who try to take advantage of you in the future—be it in babysitting, or any other arena of life." Newsweek has contacted u/SecretiveGurl on Reddit for comment on this story. Do you have a similar monetary dilemma? Let us know via life@ We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
Daily Mail
10-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Etiquette experts say if you're doing these things at a wedding, you're breaking every unspoken rule
Getting married takes a lot of planning and guests not following a list of simple, unspoken rules could test even the strongest of friendships, say a team of wedding experts. Nicola Barker, head of buying at Suit Direct has teamed up with etiquette guru Jo Hayes and dating coach Emily Thompson to unveil the list of things that wedding guests should never do. With many of us gearing up for a summer of ceremonies, receptions, and dress codes, the team have given tips on how to avoid the inevitable guest slip-ups. From showing up to the reception with an unexpected plus one to getting a little too familiar with the free bar, there are many faux pas that people often fall foul of. However, the experts say that not all wedding guest mistakes are quite so obvious on the big day. They explained that some of the worst etiquette slip-ups are surprisingly subtle but can cause major stress for the happy couple behind the scenes. Here are the most common wedding guest blunders and how to avoid them... RSVP FAIL AND WEDDING BREAKFAST ETIQUETTE Emily explained that a tardy RSVP can cause instant chaos for the wedding couple. 'Late-RSVPing is the silent killer of etiquette; it messes with everything from seating charts to catering orders. 'People don't realize how much depends on these final counts.' Another silent blunder is skipping the nuptials and only turning up for the after party. Emily said: 'It's just poor etiquette unless you've cleared it with the couple ahead. 'The ceremony is the whole point of the day-where the couple makes their vows and, usually, in front of their nearest family and friends. 'Not being there sends a clear message that you're here for the food and drinks, not for the marriage. 'I've heard couples say it genuinely hurt their feelings to look around during the vows and see empty chairs that later filled up at the reception. 'If for some reason you can't be there for the ceremony, let the couple know ahead of time, and express your regrets.' Jo added: 'To be invited to a wedding is a great honour. The couple could have invited someone else, giving another person the opportunity to witness and celebrate their vows, had they known you wouldn't show up. 'Intentionally choosing to skip this part of the occasion is disrespectful.' CAN YOU ALWAYS BRING A PLUS ONE? One of the most common wedding guest dilemmas is whether you can bring a plus-one if the invite doesn't explicitly say so. In short, if it's not written on the invitation, no plus-one is invited. Jo said: 'A firm, no. Weddings are expensive events to put on, which often means, limited guest capacity. 'Couples spend a lot of time curating their guest list to ensure they hit the right balance with regard to guest numbers and financial constraints. 'Brazenly assuming one can bring a plus-one, without that plus-one being specifically invited is disrespectful, and dare I say, supremely entitled.' Emily agreed, adding: 'Your invitation should specify in so many words, 'and guest,' or else your plus-one is strictly not allowed. 'Guests should resist misinterpreting vague RSVP cards to bring along a date on the big day and sit at a table with no setting for their date—awkward for all. 'Couples decide upon their guest lists carefully, balancing venue space with constraints imposed by budget and family politics. 'It isn't just a matter of finances but rather of space and intimacy. Erring cautiously, if there is some uncertainty, an email should suffice as a polite way of clearing up the matter; it's better always not to assume. 'Having someone not invited puts pressure on the couple and their planning team on-the-day—believe me, I have seen this cause chaos.' 'If you're unsure about whether you can bring a wedding guest, Jo explained that asking the wedding couple if it is allowed is only acceptable if you're in a long-term relationship. 'Approaching the couple about potentially bringing a plus-one would usually only be considered acceptable if it is a serious, long-term relationship (a new boyfriend of four weeks usually won't cut it)' An open bar at a wedding might feel like a golden ticket, but there's a fine line between making the most of it and monopolising it. Emily explained: 'A good rule is to limit yourself to one drink per hour and definitely don't start drinking until after the ceremony. 'Sure, pre-ceremony cocktails may seem fun, but I have witnessed too many guests slurring through readings or stumbling down the aisle-and that is the type of moment that stays with everyone for all the wrong reasons.' 'For wedding party members, you set the tone for the rest of the evening, so it's respectful to refrain from drinking until it is all clear. 'Also, keep in mind, the couple are paying for that bar-it might seem fun to you to order five shots in a row, but it is costly and somewhat impolite.' Additionally, Jo gave a stark warning to avoid getting drunk at all costs while attending a wedding. 'Too drunk? Any level of drunk is a faux pax. I don't care if some say it's "culturally appropriate" for their family circle.' If you want an etiquette expert's perspective, the general etiquette rule is: 'No intoxication.' 'Sure, enjoy a couple of drinks. But be respectful and responsible. Avoid getting drunk. 'As a general rule, I would discourage people from drinking before the ceremony. A small champagne, or a light beer, as they're getting ready, may be ok. But I generally suggest people err on the side of caution.' WHAT YOU SHOULD AND DEFINITELY SHOULDN'T WEAR When it comes to what to wear, the line between stylish and inappropriate can be surprisingly easy to cross. Jo explained: 'Really, the only 'rule' is for women, who should avoid wearing all-white. 'Anything that looks too close to what the bride will be wearing is a no-go. This also includes very light shades of cream or very pale pastels. 'A woman appearing in long, all-white (or, very pale) gown is erring far too close to the bride's outfit and could potentially be trying to steal the spotlight.' Emily added: 'Another controversial colour is red; Western cultures consider red blatantly conspicuous and would even think it inappropriate if it dressed too 'sexily' for a formal wedding. 'Black is still another colour that presents a challenge. Contemporary weddings may tolerate its use, but the previous generations will link it symbolically with mourning.' Nicola said: 'The golden rule is simple – dress for the occasion the couple planned. 'That means following the dress code on the invite, whether it's black tie or cocktail – and never assume 'casual' men's jeans and a pair of trainers. 'Even at a laid-back venue, it's still a special event, so I'd always advise to dress slightly up rather than down.' WHAT TO WEAR: THE DOs Incorporate Colour Thoughtfully Before reaching out for a bold floral or a standout shade, take a second to check the couples overall colour scheme. While you're not expected to blend in, it's thoughtful to avoid matching the bridesmaids or groomsmen. Choose complementary tones that don't draw too much focus. Ensure Proper Fit Re-wear older items only after confirming they still fit well. Try it on well before the big day. Bodies change and so do tailoring standards. If it doesn't fit quite right, make sure to get alterations booked in. Pack Essentials Even the most carefully chosen outfit can run into last-minute mishaps. A mini sewing kit, lint roller, and a couple of safety pins can save the day — and someone else's, too. WHAT TO WEAR: THE DON'TS Avoid Last-Minute Packing Hang your outfit as soon as possible and use a fabric steamer to eliminate creases. Skip Floral Boutonnieres While it might seem like a sweet detail, floral accessories like boutonnieres are traditionally reserved for the wedding party. Opt for a stylish lapel pin or pocket square instead — it's a great way to show personality without stepping on the groom's toes· Reserve Special Looks for the Groom Unless the invitation specifically calls for it, steer clear of white dinner jackets, statement tuxedos, or anything that might read as 'main character energy.' These standout styles are typically reserved for the groom and his groomsmen.
Newsweek
07-05-2025
- Newsweek
Neighbor Cheered for Confronting Mom Over What Her Son Did in the Backyard
Based on facts, either observed and verified firsthand by the reporter, or reported and verified from knowledgeable sources. Newsweek AI is in beta. Translations may contain inaccuracies—please refer to the original content. A person who was accused of having "crushed" a little boy's imagination as he pretended to be a pirate has been backed online. The person, who did not give their name but posts to Reddit under the username u/TripleDigitMan, took to the r/AmITheA*****e sub on May 6, where they asked if they were in the wrong "for not letting my neighbor's kid ruin my lawn in the name of imagination?" The neighbor explained they are on "polite" terms with their neighbors two doors down, who have a 9- or 10-year-old son who is going through a pirate phase, from wearing eyepatches to pretending to battle with squirrels, which the neighbor first thought was "pretty wholesome." Until, that is, they started noticing holes appearing in their yard. First attributing the damage to raccoons, the holes started getting bigger—and the neighbor then found a pirate treasure map beside a "completely torn up" patch of grass. Jo Hayes, of began by saying "this 'pirate phase' is supremely cute," as "burying treasure in the yard sounds like a great play activity for a young boy," but added: "As long as it's in his own yard." "This etiquette expert is 100 percent behind [the neighbor]. It is not ok for his neighbor's kid to be burying treasure in his yard. Especially as he has been very clear about his not agreeing to this," Hayes said. The neighbor wrote in their post that they eventually caught the boy "mid-dig" in their yard, and warned him he was not allowed to do this—and while the boy "got a little huffy," he went home, and the neighbor thought "that was the end of it." But it wasn't. The very next day, they found a box of buried treasure in a hole behind their shed, filled with cards, money and toy coins and jewelry, and so took the box to the boy's house and told his mother what was going on. To their shock, the mother got "defensive" and gave no apology, instead insisting, "He's just using his imagination, I think it's sweet." Hayes told Newsweek: "What planet is this mother living on? 99 percent of the normal adult population would understand that one cannot let one's child dig up, and leave holes in, another person's yard. Completely not ok." She suggested the mother's reaction was, "unfortunately, typical of the 'entitled mom'—the mom who's blind to her child's faults and responds defensively to anyone laying down healthy boundaries towards her child. "The correct response to finding out that her child has dug up another person's yard is to apologize profusely, and to explain to her son that he cannot go around digging holes in other people's yards. This is about respecting other people's property." But when the neighbor pressed the issue of the boy destroying their lawn, the mother responded: "Can't you just let him have this? It's not like your grass is that nice anyway." Admitting they were "stunned," they wrote: "I said, as politely as possible, that I didn't want holes being dug on my property by someone else's kid. I handed over the box and left. "That night, she sends a long text telling me I humiliated her son, crushed his imagination, and 'created an environment where children can't feel safe being children.' She said he cried for over an hour and now thinks I'm 'the villain in his story.' (Her words.)" The neighbor felt torn over the situation, as they understand he's "a kid," but they didn't yell at him or shame him, and gave his box of treasure back. They wrote that they are simply sick of their yard being "turned into a sandbox and being insulted for not being okay with it." Expert Hayes assured the neighbor that they had done "nothing wrong here" and had in fact "done everything right." "It sounds like you weren't mean to the boy—you simply made it clear this digging of holes couldn't continue. You have done nothing to create an 'unsafe' environment for children," Hayes said. "This latest interaction may have upset the boy, but this 'cried for over an hour' could have been prevented, had his mother done her job properly, and taught him the ins and outs of correct behavior. Digging holes in the neighbor's yard is not ok. It's disrespectful." Pictured: Stock image of a boy from the back, walking into a house's yard. Pictured: Stock image of a boy from the back, walking into a house's neighbor asked Reddit commentators whether they were in the wrong—and was instantly vindicated. Their post racked up more than 11,000 upvotes, as one commenter wrote: "His mom needs to teach him to respect others' property. You don't get to do whatever the hell you want as a kid in the name of 'using your imagination.'" One suggested the neighbor should "send the family a bill for repairing the damage" to the yard, as another agreed: "People don't respect polite boundaries, but they sure listen when you bring up consequences." "Whether your grass is nice or not, it's your grass. She's raising her kid awfully if she isn't teaching him basic boundaries like respecting other people's property," another said. And as one put it: "You didn't cross any boundaries. He did. When a kid oversteps, you inform their parents, and they have a teaching moment with their child. You have every right to enjoy your property, even if she's an ineffective parent." Hayes, too, said the neighbor appears to have "acted calmly, clearly communicating" the issue, but the mother "acted emotionally, defensively lashing out with unfair and unjust accusations" that make her appear "unreasonable." And like Reddit users, she suggested the neighbor "keep his cool, and if this happens again, inform local council or appropriate government agencies," as a letter from the council warning the neighbor "should do the job in hitting home the fact that what her son has done, and what she's allowed him to do, is not ok." Newsweek has contacted u/TripleDigitMan on Reddit for comment on this story. Do you have a dispute with your neighbor? Let us know via life@ We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
North Wales Live
25-04-2025
- Health
- North Wales Live
Workers admit to vaping while on work video calls amid call for 'action'
Etiquette expert Jo Hayes believes workers are getting 'far too comfortable with unprofessional beahviour' when working from home – and claims it's turning the UK workforce into slobs. Her comments come off the back of new research from Riot Labs which has revealed 62% of those who vape have admitted to puffing away whilst on work zoom calls amongst clients, colleagues and even bosses. 45% confess to not performing basic hygiene before work calls and 14% take calls whilst on the toilet. Jo, founder of Hayes, said over half of workers in a survey thought vaping omn a call was 'unprofessional", 'distracting' and worthy of 'disciplinary action'. Jo said: 'Even if the boss can't see, vaping on a work call is slobbish, unprofessional behaviour. Working from home lulls workers into a false sense of security as to what is, and is not, ok, in a professional setting. Vaping in full view of colleagues on video calls pushes the limit and bosses or clients could put a red strike through your professional name.' 45% of people say they don't brush their teeth before work, 14% admit to taking client calls whilst on the toilet. 11% said they'd burped on a work Zoom call from home, while 42% claimed to have shouted at other members of their household while on work calls. Riot Labs spokesperson, David Donaghy, said: 'The appropriateness of vaping on a work Zoom call came up in a recent meeting so we wanted to delve a little deeper into people's work from home habits. Vaping is the most effective tool for quitting smoking and while its tempting to vape in the home office, we recommend adopting a 'vape break' in the fresh air, which is far more appropriate.' The number of people working from home more than doubled between December 2019, shortly before the start of the pandemic, and March 2022 from 4.7 million to 9.9 million, according to official figures. Almost half of UK workers engage in remote work at least part of the week, with 28% adopting a hybrid model and 13% working from home full-time.
Wales Online
25-04-2025
- Health
- Wales Online
Workers admit to vaping while on work video calls amid call for 'action'
Our community members are treated to special offers, promotions and adverts from us and our partners. You can check out at any time. More info Etiquette expert Jo Hayes believes workers are getting 'far too comfortable with unprofessional beahviour' when working from home – and claims it's turning the UK workforce into slobs. Her comments come off the back of new research from Riot Labs which has revealed 62% of those who vape have admitted to puffing away whilst on work zoom calls amongst clients, colleagues and even bosses. 45% confess to not performing basic hygiene before work calls and 14% take calls whilst on the toilet. Jo, founder of Hayes, said over half of workers in a survey thought vaping omn a call was 'unprofessional", 'distracting' and worthy of 'disciplinary action'. Jo said: 'Even if the boss can't see, vaping on a work call is slobbish, unprofessional behaviour. Working from home lulls workers into a false sense of security as to what is, and is not, ok, in a professional setting. Vaping in full view of colleagues on video calls pushes the limit and bosses or clients could put a red strike through your professional name.' 45% of people say they don't brush their teeth before work, 14% admit to taking client calls whilst on the toilet. 11% said they'd burped on a work Zoom call from home, while 42% claimed to have shouted at other members of their household while on work calls. Riot Labs spokesperson, David Donaghy, said: 'The appropriateness of vaping on a work Zoom call came up in a recent meeting so we wanted to delve a little deeper into people's work from home habits. Vaping is the most effective tool for quitting smoking and while its tempting to vape in the home office, we recommend adopting a 'vape break' in the fresh air, which is far more appropriate.' The number of people working from home more than doubled between December 2019, shortly before the start of the pandemic, and March 2022 from 4.7 million to 9.9 million, according to official figures. Almost half of UK workers engage in remote work at least part of the week, with 28% adopting a hybrid model and 13% working from home full-time.
