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Is politics important in a marriage? ‘Love is Blind' breakup sparks debate
Is politics important in a marriage? ‘Love is Blind' breakup sparks debate

Washington Post

time10-03-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Washington Post

Is politics important in a marriage? ‘Love is Blind' breakup sparks debate

Season 8 of Netflix's 'Love Is Blind' delivered an unexpectedly provocative finale — not with a shocking revelation but with a resolute 'Today, I can't' by one bride on her wedding day. At the altar, Sara Carton rejected Ben Mezzenga because of politics. Carton told her mother and sister that her fiancé's views on Black Lives Matter and LGBTQ+ rights weren't just different from hers, but signaled a fundamental misalignment. Throughout the social experiment in which contestants get engaged before seeing each other in person, Carton expressed that equality, religion and vaccines were important conversations to her. On these issues, she said, 'There was no curiosity from him.' The show, which was filmed between February and March 2024, is airing as President Donald Trump's agenda targets diversity initiatives and trans rights as part of a push against 'woke' politics — and has sparked a larger debate about whether having the same political beliefs is a relationship dealbreaker. 'OBSESSED with Sara on love is blind for showing that politics matter in relationships,' one viewer posted on X. Another praised her for asking 'the important questions about their views on society.' Others felt she was unfairly pushing an agenda, arguing she was trying to 'force him to be an activist and be involved in politics' — and that love and marriage can exist without agreeing on everything. Before walking away, the 29-year-old oncology nurse told Mezzenga, 28, that their past conversations about 'the values' she holds led to her decision. 'I remember I asked him about Black Lives Matter, and I'm no expert, but when I asked him about it, he was like, 'I guess I never really thought too much about it,'' she said. The season was filmed in Minneapolis — the city where George Floyd's murder ignited the Black Lives Matter movement in 2020 — making Mezzenga's indifference even harder for her to ignore. 'That affected me,' she said. She also took issue with the traditional church he attends and said that their views weren't liberal enough for her. Carton talked about the importance of his accepting LGBTQ+ individuals such as her sister, Lisa, and Lisa's partner, Kelsie. Mezzenga also said in the pods that he didn't vote in the previous presidential election. Many viewers praised Carton for elevating these discussions on such a mainstream platform. 'Not being interested in politics is called privilege,' one commenter noted on Instagram Threads. Others had a drastically different take. In a public Love is Blind Season 8 Facebook group, one person posted a picture of Mezzenga at the reunion and wrote, 'Sad to watch a Christian man getting beaten down because he didn't ask enough questions about LBGTQ!' The post has more than 440 comments as of Monday afternoon, including another person urging him to 'Stay faithful to the word. Shouldn't need to apologize for your beliefs.' Conservative voices were also quick to weigh in. 'Let's find him a nice, conservative 20-something girl. He'll look back and laugh at this,' wrote Fox News anchor Laura Ingraham on X. Tomi Lahren echoed the sentiment, writing simply, 'He dodged a bullet.' Others noted that it wasn't just about the politics, but about the way the couple connected over these issues. Podcaster and TikToker Gilét Slays made a video that Mezzenga 'buried his head in the sand when it came to uncomfortable topics of conversation.' 'Regardless of their views, in this political climate, it is so much [more] important to be on the same page,' said one comment on a TikTok video. 'People need to be sure to have the same values before you marry regardless of your status.' The finale also prompted people to talk about their own relationship red flags. 'I left a dude because he voted for Trump. Women are not settling because it will cost you later ... hard! Good for you Sara!,' one person said on Threads. Many Black online commentators overwhelmingly supported her choice. 'She's invited to the cookout!!!' one person wrote, a phrase often used to signal approval of an ally. The hit reality dating show, where strangers meet and date in private pods, focusing on emotional connections rather than physical appearance, has always had the end goal of making couples say 'yes' or 'no' on decision day. At the altar, Mezzenga said he wanted to continue dating. 'I care about you too. I love you too, and I want to stay with you and keep growing our relationship if you let me,' he told Carton. By the reunion — which took place about a year after filming — things had unraveled. Ben said he'd benefited from privilege but claimed he didn't 'remember' his church's stance on homosexuality because 'there wasn't anyone in my life it pertained to.' Sara said they had planned to live together in Nashville, but he never followed through. Instead, she said he removed her from his 'Find My Friends' app and sent what she called a 'scripted' apology. Ben insisted they had already broken up, which ended up being a back-and-forth disagreement onstage. Reflecting on her choice, Sara told People Magazine, 'I wasn't looking for a right or wrong answer. I just wanted depth — an understanding of where we came from and how we see the world.' In an interview with Us Weekly, the magazine asked Carton whether she had a final question for her former groom. Without hesitation she said, 'I wonder if he voted in the 2024 election.'

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