16-04-2025
Here's A List Of Things That Lasted Longer Than Katy Perry's Trip To Space, Because The Whole Thing Took Literally 11 Minutes
By now, we all know that Katy Perry was in space on Monday. She and five other women were part of the Blue Origin expedition, which was organized in partnership with billionaire Jeff Bezos in some sort of weird, pseudo-feminist, late-stage capitalism nightmare scenario.
Anyway, despite some people feeling deep trepidation at Katy 's brave and arduous expedition, the whole thing lasted maybe 11 minutes. The crew was only in actual space for about 4 minutes, and I'm probably not the only person who is deeply underwhelmed, especially as the trip generated more CO2 emissions than one person creates in an entire lifetime.
To really demonstrate how ridiculous this stunt was, I've made a brief list of extremely short things that lasted longer than Katy's trip to space.
1. The 'Mission: Space' ride at EPCOT (15 mins including pre-show)
2. The ' All Too Well ' short film by Taylor Swift (14 mins 55 seconds)
3. The fastest spin cycle on a washing machine (20 mins)
4. Half an episode of 'SpongeBob SquarePants' (12 mins)
5. Preheating an oven (15 mins, feels like an hour)
6. The shelf life of an avocado (barely more than 11 mins)
7. Louis XIX's reign as King of France (20 mins, Google it)
8. The Uber when it says it's five minutes away (it's not)
9. Drying my hair (all morning)
Siarhei Khaletski / Getty Images
10. The TikTok ban (12 hours)
11. The time it takes me to find a suitable video essay to watch while I eat (until my food goes cold)
Ivan Rodriguez Alba / Getty Images
12. The double un-skipppable YouTube ads on my video essay (too long)
13. The time it took Katy Perry to get in full glam for her space excursion (probably)
14. The first ever flight by humans in a hot air balloon, 1783 (25 mins)
15. The time it took me to write this list.
Which is longer than you would think.
