6 days ago
‘Work became my therapy': Tsholofelo Matshaba on coping after husband's death
Seasoned actor Tsholofelo Matshaba opens up about losing her husband Chris to cancer in 2018.
Matshaba says returning to work early became therapy that helped her cope with grief.
The star admits grief never goes away: 'You don't get over losing your life partner.'
Six years after losing her husband to cancer, actor Tsholofelo Matshaba is opening up about grief, healing, and how her craft became an unexpected lifeline during the darkest period of her life.
Chris Matshaba, a beloved former Motsweding FM and North West FM radio presenter, died in 2018 following a lengthy battle with cancer.
He was just six months shy of his 40th birthday when he died, leaving behind a devastated wife who had to navigate life without the man she 'woke up next to every single morning.'
The couple married in 2014 in Ramokokastad in the North West province, building a life together that would be tragically cut short by illness.
Rather than taking extended time off to mourn, Tsholofelo made a decision that surprised many - she returned to work relatively quickly after her husband's burial.
But for the seasoned performer, this wasn't about avoiding grief; it was about survival.
'We, as performers, know that our work is also therapy. It heals. It's therapy for the audience. But this time around, my work became my therapy, and that's how I was able to cope,' she explains.
At the time, Tsholofelo was juggling two demanding projects - filming the long-running drama Muvhango while simultaneously working on the comedy series Skwizas.
To outsiders, her ability to switch between intense drama and lighthearted comedy seemed impossible for someone in the throes of grief.
The stage and screen became her safe space to channel the overwhelming emotions that threatened to consume her.
'That's how I took out some of the pain, some of the anger, some of the frustrations, some of the questions that I know will never be answered. I laid it out on stage,' she reveals.
The healing power of performance wasn't without its challenges. During one particularly difficult day on set, Tsholofelo encountered an unexpected trigger - a coffin used as a prop. The sight sent her spiralling, a stark reminder that grief doesn't follow schedules.
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When asked how she 'got over' losing her husband, she said, 'You don't.'
'This was a person you woke up next to every single morning. This was a person you saw forever with, you know.' Six years later, Tsholofelo acknowledges that healing isn't linear.
Her relationship with grief continues to evolve, marked by good days and challenging ones. 'It doesn't go away. Today I can talk about it and smile. Tomorrow it might be something else. And when you ask me about him, I might tear up or cry even,' she admits.
A year after Chris's passing, Tsholofelo took to Instagram to share a tribute.
She described the pain as something that 'still cuts and burns like a hot rod.'
Her tribute was also a celebration of the love they shared: 'I am grateful to have been blessed to have you and all your true love. It was always sweet to call you my angel, now it's bittersweet.'
