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Newsroom
24-05-2025
- Business
- Newsroom
The secret diary of .. the Budget
NICOLA WILLIS People think of the Budget as an economic response to the state of the nation. And traditionally that has been the case. But this Government is not bound by tradition. This Government, Mr Speaker, is an exciting Government. The Prime Minister is exciting. You only have to spend five seconds with him to know that. Six seconds might be pushing it. But I want to return to my original point which is to deny that the 2025 Budget is an economic response to the state of the nation. The 2025 Budget is in fact an economic response to the stain of the nation. Because it is a stain on the nation when you have young people age at 18, 19 on the sofa playing PlayStation when we want to see them in training or in work. And that is why we are making benefits means-tested for 18- and 19-year-olds. We need to address the stain. We need to wipe up the stain. We are going to soak the stain in means-testing, and then we'll be able to see what comes out in the wash. I want to see them in training. They may not be able to get a job, but they can go to a polytech. They can get into an apprenticeship, and they wouldn't be tested for that. The parents wouldn't be. They will become eligible for student allowances and the full range of student support, and that's the whole point of the policy. And at the end they still may not be able to get a job, because unemployment is at record levels and looks set to get even worse. Then, and only then, can they return to the sofa and play PlayStation. Grand Theft Auto VI is due in 2026 and it promises swamp chases and helicopter fights. It will provide hours of fun to fill in the vacant days. Thank you, Mr Speaker. CHRIS HIPKINS Mr Speaker, this is a scramble without the lollies. There are no super gummy snakes. There are no sour bananas. There are no milk bottles. There are no jersey caramels. There are no tangy fruit sticks. There are no sour cola bottles. There are no wine gums. There are no jetplanes. There are no spearmint leaves. Mr Speaker, and excuse me for shouting, BUT THERE ARE NO LICORICE ALLSORTS. Who wants a world without lollies? What do we have to look forward to? With this Budget, Mr Speaker, Nicola Willis and the coalition Government have done more than taken away our right to enjoy a sweet treat. They have taken away our hope. Night has fallen. We are lost and cold in the dark, children who have never been happy or good. I do not wish to exaggerate or play on our fears when I say this Budget is a crime against humanity. Thank you, Mr Speaker. SHANE JONES Mr Speaker, the leader of the New Zealand Party, the Rt Hon Winston Peters, has had to leave for elsewhere and given me very little notice to respond to the Budget but I shall try my best and what I want to say, Mr Speaker, is that we all have prosperity within us. It is sent down like a thunderbolt from Zeus and illuminates our path forward through the mighty forest and across the arid plains towards a better tomorrow. Each of us are lanterns of wealth. The Budget is but a wick. Night has fallen. Woke-riddled snowflakes are afraid of the dark. Too bad. Winter is coming. Thank you, Mr Speaker. THE LANDLORDS OF NEW ZEALAND Thank you, Nicola Willis. We can see daylight.
Otago Daily Times
09-05-2025
- Business
- Otago Daily Times
The secret diary of ... The new pay equity legislation
By Steve Braunais BROOKE VAN VELDEN As workplace minister, and more importantly as a woman, I am proud today to co-announce changes to pay equity legislation alongside Finance Minister Nicola Willis, who is also a woman. NICOLA WILLIS Yes. And we are joined by Judith Collins, Erica Stanford, Louise Upston and Nicola Grigg. BROOKE VAN VELDEN All women. NICOLA WILLIS Six in total, which is roughly the same number of women who vote for Act. BROOKE VAN VELDEN I don't know if the finance minister has her figures right but that wouldn't be the first time. Moving on. We want to send a message to women. It's a powerful and uplifting message. NICOLA WILLIS Yes. The message of the government's changes to pay equity legislation is that many women will no longer have to smash the glass ceiling. BROOKE VAN VELDEN That's right. Because we've lifted the glass ceiling. NICOLA WILLIS That's what the workplace minister meant when she said the message was uplifting. BROOKE VAN VELDEN Correct. The glass ceiling is now out of reach for thousands of women who were considering making pay equity claims. NICOLA WILLIS So no smashing. No broken glass or cut fingers. No more mess. BROOKE VAN VELDEN It's all very clean. And cleanliness is very important to women. I can see Judith Collins nodding vigorously. NICOLA WILLIS Yes, and I can see Prime Minister Christopher Luxon across the room, and he's waving and giving a thumbs-up. BROOKE VAN VELDEN Not a woman. NICOLA WILLIS Indeed not, and more of a man than David Seymour. Moving on. The reforms to pay equity will save the government billions of dollars. BROOKE VAN VELDEN Which will help plug the hole in Nicola's upcoming Budget. CHRISTOPHER LUXON [Shouts] It's got nothing to do with the Budget! BROOKE VAN VELDEN Quiet in the cheap seats. David Seymour has said about the pay equity reforms, and I quote, ''I actually think that Brooke van Velden has saved the taxpayer billions, and she's saved the Budget for the government.'' NICOLA WILLIS Patent nonsense, but what can you expect from a junior partner in the coalition government. BROOKE VAN VELDEN It's National who are widely perceived as the junior partner. Look at Luxon over there. No-one takes him seriously. He's walked away, and now he's leaning against the wall with his name sewn on to his jacket. CHRISTOPHER LUXON [Shouts, gives thumbs-up] Great stuff, girls! BROOKE VAN VELDEN Did he just say ''girls''? NICOLA WILLIS No. JUDITH COLLINS I distinctly heard him say ''girls''. NICOLA WILLIS No-one is listening to you, Judith. No-one has listened to you for quite some time. NICOLA GRIGG Let's move on, everyone. BROOKE VAN VELDEN Which Nicola are you? NICOLA GRIGG I'm the minister for women. And I'm here today to say that although the ministry itself was not told about the pay equity reforms or were in any way consulted, that's all right because I'm the minister and I knew all about it, or a little bit anyway, I remember someone saying to me back in March that it was going to be a very good deal for women and not to worry about it. JOURNALIST Who told you that? NICOLA GRIGG David Seymour.
