25-07-2025
The naked truth about Page 3: Model Nicola Tappenden reveals 'shocking' wages, life-changing diagnosis at 41 and doomed relationship with Jeff Brazier
For years, Nicola Tappenden was one of Britain's most recognisable Page 3 models, beaming from tabloids and red carpets with effortless glamour.
But behind the smiles and photo shoots, she carried a weight she couldn't explain - until a life-changing diagnosis at 41 finally made everything make sense.
'I spent my life feeling different,' Nicola tells MailOnline. 'Like I didn't fit in. Always asking myself, 'Why did I say that? Why did I do that?'
That nagging feeling would follow her through fame and her relationships, including a disastrous romance with TV presenter Jeff Brazier.
Twenty years earlier, before entering the world of glamour modelling, Nicola worked in compliance at Citibank and lived in Croydon with parents Tina and Steve.
A light-hearted pub chat with friends about her 'great boobs' led to her entering The Sun's Page 3 Idol contest in 2002.
She kept her progress in the competition a secret from work and when her manager found out, he jokingly confronted her. However, the company's HR wasn't so lighthearted and told her she'd boosted office morale, but her time at the bank was up.
Soon after, Nicola won the contest with over 25,000 votes. The prize: a one-year contract with The Sun, red carpet invites, photoshoots, celebrity parties, and what was sold as a fast track to fame and fortune.
She was 20, living at home with her parents in Croydon and working for a bank when her friends encouraged her to apply for the contest, which she won after attracting more than 25,000 votes from The Sun readers
'It was just a massive whirlwind,' Nicola recalls.
Suddenly, at aged 20 Nicola was walking the red carpet and meeting A-listers at the premiere of The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers.
The following day's paper would see Nicola posing in a barely-there dress with the headline: 'Good Lord, it's Nicola's 2 towers!'.
'One night I was at a premiere mixing with A-listers, the next morning I was having a bowl of cornflakes with my mum and dad,' she says.
However, she would soon discover the promise of 'fortune' was underwhelming - £1,000 a month.
'I was earning more at the bank,' Nicola reveals.
'I got paid £1,000 a month and then £250 a day to attend events but that might be one day a week or one day a month.'
Nicola also found the reality far less glamorous than it appeared.
'I think I did Page 3 for about five years altogether.
'It just isn't what you think it would be.'
Despite the public attention, Nicola began to realise that behind the glossy images, her mental health was unravelling. She never felt good enough - not pretty enough, not smart enough and not worthy.
She was also subject to a deeply unsettling experience. During a visit to Gibraltar to welcome home Royal Navy officers, Nicola found herself alone in a private room with a group of drunk, high-ranking men.
They pressured her to expose herself. Intimidated and alone, she complied - then fled the room in tears.
'They just kept chanting. I eventually gave in - and I've never felt so ashamed.'
Back in England, her agent reported the incident. She was sent flowers and an apology - she heard nothing more.
'I was young and vulnerable, and instead of being protected, I was exposed,' she says.
Despite the challenges, Nicola became iconic in the Page 3 world. But inwardly, she struggled with relentless self-doubt.
'I never felt pretty enough. I would obsess over every photo. I just wanted to be liked.'
She dated several high-profile men, including footballers Bobby Zamora and Simon Walton, who she welcomed daughter Poppy with.
Bobby, she says, opened her eyes to a world beyond Croydon.
'He lived in a penthouse in Canary Wharf, and showed me a totally different kind of life. He was normal, funny, kind. I'm grateful to him for that.'
She later dated Jeff Brazier, TV presenter and ex-partner of the late Jade Goody. Their relationship, Nicola says, was deeply unhealthy from the start.
'If I'd known then what I know now - about trauma, about myself - I never would have stayed. But I did, because I was desperate to be liked, to feel enough.
'There was a defining moment, and at that point, I should have said I'm never going to speak to you ever again.'
Meanwhile, as the Page 3 culture shifted, Nicola became disillusioned.
'The early days of Page 3 when photographer Beverley Goodway was there were the best,' she says.
'He created this amazing culture and when the girls got together, we all loved to see each other.
'It changed when Beverley retired.'
During a calendar shoot, Nicola clashed with another model over their unkind behaviour. To this day, she's unsure if she quit or was pushed out - but either way, she was done.
She remains close to fellow ex-Page 3 girls Nikkala Stott and Keeley Hazell.
'We laugh all the time because they say I got sacked. If I got sacked, I didn't know about it. But I never went on Page 3 again,' she says.
By then, Nicola had built a successful business, launched a fashion label, and went on to appear on reality TV shows, including WAGs Boutique and Celebrity Big Brother where she entered the house to boos.
'Coming out to cheers felt like people were finally seeing me for who I really was,' she says.
But the turning point in Nicola's life came at the school gates. A fellow mum suggested Nicola might have ADHD after recognising the same symptoms her daughter had.
At first, Nicola was stunned. She then received a professional diagnosis and cried for weeks.
'It was like someone had lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. I realised there was never anything 'wrong' with me, it was what was right with me.
'I grieved for that little girl who was constantly misunderstood. The girl who always felt like she was failing and never good enough.'
The diagnosis reframed her life. It also gave her the tools to help her daughter, Poppy, who has also been diagnosed with ADHD.
Determined to support other women like her, Nicola launched Noops, a supplement brand aimed at managing ADHD symptoms.
She spent 18 months working with scientists to develop the gluten-free and vegan supplement designed to support brain health, energy, mood, focus and sleep.
'I didn't want more chemical medication. But the supplement market was overwhelming. So I created what I wished had existed,' says Nicola, who also runs digital consultancy, Belle Digital.
Now 42, she lives a quieter life in Surrey with ex-footballer partner Simon - whom she reunited with 12 years after their split - and their daughter, Poppy, 16, as well as son Louis, five, who she had in another relationship.
'Simon and I found each other again and it's definitely where I'm meant to be.'
Nicola no longer chases the limelight - she chases meaning.
'Celebrity life wasn't good for my mental health. It made me feel desperate, and I never want to feel like that again,' she says.
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She dreams of launching a ADHD support network for women, to help others avoid the pain she endured silently for so long.
And she has her sights set on taking Noops to America, as well as raising awareness about ADHD in girls.
She explains: 'ADHD goes undiagnosed in girls because the traits are so different. In boys, we recognise the traits as being hyperactive and a naughty little boy,
'But little girls, it's so different. They are almost in a bubble, in a fairy bubble.'
Today, Nicola isn't just a former model. She's a mother, a businesswoman, an ADHD advocate - and someone who has finally found peace in who she is.
'There were times I didn't want to be here anymore. But now I know - I was always worthy. I just needed to understand myself first.'
WHAT IS ADHD?
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a behavioural condition defined by inattentiveness, hyperactivity and impulsiveness.
It affects around five per cent of children in the US. Some 3.6 per cent of boys and 0.85 per cent of girls suffer in the UK.
Symptoms typically appear at an early age and become more noticeable as a child grows. These can also include:
Constant fidgeting
Poor concentration
Excessive movement or talking
Acting without thinking
Inability to deal with stress
Little or no sense of danger
Careless mistakes
Mood swings
Forgetfulness
Difficulty organising tasks
Continually starting new tasks before finishing old ones
Inability to listen or carry out instructions
Most cases are diagnosed between six and 12 years old. Adults can also suffer, but there is less research into this.
ADHD's exact cause is unclear but is thought to involve genetic mutations that affect a person's brain function and structure.
Premature babies and those with epilepsy or brain damage are more at risk.
ADHD is also linked to anxiety, depression, insomnia, Tourette's and epilepsy.
There is no cure.
A combination of medication and therapy is usually recommended to relieve symptoms and make day-to-day life easier.
