Latest news with #SarmaMelngailis
New York Post
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- New York Post
'Bad Vegan' Sarma Melngailis claims her ex ruined her life
The recognizable duck portraits that once hung in the dining room of Pure Food and Wine now live in an apartment a block and a half away, with the shuttered Gramercy restaurant's co-owner, Sarma Melngailis. 'When the restaurant was opening, it started with those photographs. Those are two of the three. I got two of them back,' Melngailis, 52, told The Post. 'I didn't want to put vegetables on the wall,' she said — despite the fact that the eatery, which was popular with A-listers like Alec Baldwin, Gisele Bündchen, Bill Clinton and Woody Harrelson, was focused on 'raw vegan' dishes. 15 Sarma Melngailis — aka, the subject of the Netflix series 'Bad Vegan' — has written a memoir, 'The Girl with the Duck Tattoo,' about the incidents that led to her arrest. Chris Dempsey Melngailis has a thing for ducks: There's one tattooed on her arm, and she named her mail-order food business (which, according to its website is, 're-hatching soon') One Lucky Duck. But she claims her own luck ran out when she fell for Anthony Strangis, her now ex-husband and the man with whom she was arrested in Tennessee, near the Dollywood theme park, in 2016. The story of her downfall, conviction on charges of grand larceny, and subsequent prison time were detailed in the buzzy Netflix docu-series 'Bad Vegan.' 15 Melngailis claims her ex-husband is to blame for driving her restaurant into the ground after promising he could help her expand the business — and make her beloved dog, Leon, live forever. Chris Dempsey Now, Melngailis is telling her side of the story in a new memoir, 'The Girl With The Duck Tattoo,' and an exclusive interview with The Post. 'That guy took control of me and my mind, for the most part. He dragged me into a delusion,' she said of Strangis. '[People like that] put you in a state of fear and you end up trapped. It puts you in a situation where you don't see your way out.' She claims he is to blame for driving her restaurant into the ground after promising he could help her expand the business — and make her beloved dog, Leon, live forever. The Post has reached out to Strangis for comment. 15 Melngailis was convicted of grand larceny, among other crimes. 15 Her then-husband, Anthony Strangis, also served time for the crimes. Melngailis, who grew up in Massachusetts, was a Manhattan culinary darling before her arrest. She gave up a career in finance to pursue a degree from the French Culinary Institute — a gamble that paid off when she and then-boyfriend Matthew Kenney, a star chef in the city's vegan world opened their first restaurant, Commissary, in 2001, followed by Pure Food and Wine in 2004. The couple split a year later and Melngailis bought out Kenney's stake, throwing herself completely into the restaurant. As former employee Benito Borjas-Fitzpatrick told The Post in 2016, 'She was obsessed. She worked constantly. Sometimes she would even sleep at the restaurant.' It was a celebrity hotspot just as veganism was becoming super trendy. And it brought Melngailis her own fans, including Alec Baldwin — with whom, she claims in her memoir, she had an emotional affair. Baldwin even met his future wife, Hilaria, at Pure. 15 Pure Food and Wine was a hit with A-listers such as Woody Harrelson (left, with Melngailis, her then boyfriend and business partner Matthew Kenney, and actor Jason Lewis). Getty Images 15 The Gramercy restaurant served a raw vegan menu. Victoria Will Melngailis writes in her memoir that Strangis, who also went by the name Shane Fox, came into her life through Baldwin, after the two men had a Twitter exchange in 2011. 'Then [Strangis] followed me, and I followed him back. He started commenting on my posts, and soon, our own back-and-forth ensued. It quickly moved to direct messages,' Melngailis writes. 'He said his name was Shane Fox. I still didn't know much else about him, but since Alec followed him, I assumed they were friends, or at least acquaintances.' Melngailis and 'Fox' exchanged texts, then phone calls, for two months before meeting. 'It wasn't even that we had an emotional connection. It was that he knew how to hook me.' Melngailis told The Post. 15 Alec Baldwin met wife Hilaria at Pure Food and Wine. Getty Images She only found out later that he had lied about his real name — and been convicted nearly a decade before of grand theft and impersonating a police officer. 'There were so many red flags.' But, she added, 'when you meet somebody in person, you're able to sense how you feel around them. You don't get that online. 'What I did by communicating with him so much online is, I let him get into my head before I even met him — and that was dangerous.' She hired him as a manager at the restaurant and, employees told The Post in 2016, they saw a change in her. The staff was also wary of Strangis. 15 Matthew Kenney split from Melngailis and left the restaurant in 2015. Michael Sofronski 15 Among the dishes served at Pure Food and Wine: Zucchini and green zebra tomato lasagna . Michael Sofronski 'He had an air of an Italian-style gangster . . . walking with a big gait and speaking in a cryptic fashion about money,' said former longtime bartender Daniel Schubmehl. Suddenly, employees claimed in 'Bad Vegan,' their once-dedicated boss was rarely around. Despite the duo's high living — spending around $2 million at casinos and on luxury travel and jewelry, according to the Brooklyn DA's office — Melngailis failed to make payroll five times in 2014. According to an indictment, she transferred nearly $1.6 million from her businesses to her personal bank account. When she went AWOL in early 2015, Pure, along with a One Lucky Duck juice bar she had opened next door, shuttered. It reopened a few months later, thanks to funding from wealthy patrons — only for the staff to walk out after not being paid again. 15 Melngailis' book is available now. Chris Dempsey Melngailis told employees the issue was due to her having changed banks; in a media interview, she chalked it up to slim margins and expensive ingredients. Accused of owing nearly $2 million to investors, employees and the IRS, Melngailis and Strangis disappeared — and she was dubbed the 'vegan Bernie Madoff.' But Melngailis, who writes in her memoir that she and Strangis were 'jointly liable' for the financial damages, claims she didn't want to run. 'He [Strangis] took me away. I was screaming my head off in the car,' she told The Post. 'I didn't want to leave. I didn't run. I wasn't aware that we were fugitives on the run. He just took me away.' In the memoir, she details psychological and sexual abuse by Strangis. 15 'I wasn't aware that we were fugitives on the run,' Melngailis said, claiming Strangis 'took me away.' Chris Dempsey The couple weren't seen for nearly 10 months, sparking a manhunt. In May 2016, they were arrested at a $99-a-night Fairfield Inn & Suites in Sevierville, Tenn. — tracked down by police after ordering a Domino's pizza. 'I never thought I was doing anything wrong. That's why it's been really painful… ' Melngailis told The Post. 'I did bad things but I paid my debt to society. At no point in time did I really — I never had the intention of doing anything bad. The last thing I would have ever wanted to do is not pay my employees.' She pleaded guilty to tax fraud, grand larceny and conspiracy to defraud in May 2017 and served four months behind bars. Strangis pleaded guilty to four counts of grand larceny and served a year and three days in lock-up. 15 Melngailis served four months at Rikers for her crimes. R Umar Abbasi 15 Melngailis filed for divorce from Strangis, seen here at a New York State Courthouse in 2017, in 2018. Stefan Jeremiah 'It was very surreal. Wherever you are, you just adapt,' Melngailis told The Post of her time at Rikers Island. 'I could see Manhattan from the dorm I was in. It's very strange to be locked up and have a view across the way of Manhattan. 'It's still on me to figure out how to address everything. I'm not going to lie, it's been hard when people are kind of yelling at me based on this false narrative of what happened and calling me a criminal,' she said. 'Someone will slide in [my DMs] and call me a grifter based on that narrative for which they [Netflix] profited. It's frustrating.' She's referring to the Netflix docu-series 'Bad Vegan,' in which she was interviewed — and which, she claims, did her dirty. 'It's been really painful because with what the director and producers made from selling the show to Netflix — all [my] debt could have been paid. I got $75,000, which I used to pay back the employees, so they were covered early on,' Melngailis told The Post. 'But beyond that I didn't get anything for my participation. But they profited a lot.' 15 Melngailis has dreams of reopening Pure Food and Wine. In January 2024, New York Magazine's Grub Street reported that Melngailis was set to participate in a second documentary — documenting the reopening of Pure Food and wine in its old location — with 'Bad Vegan' producer and former customer Mark Emms, as well as the former restaurant's landlord Jeffrey Chodorow. Melgnilis claims she was promised her current one-bedroom apartment and an $8,000-per-month salary to be a partner in the reopening, but that the deal fell apart. 'I moved back here to reopen,' Melngailis told The Post of returning to NYC from Somerville, Massachusetts, where she was working as an executive assistant. Her would-be partners, she alleged, 'were not honest. I was brought back here and then wasn't paid. That put me in an increasingly vulnerable situation. They were not remotely honest about what their plan was.' 15 Melngailis moved back to New York City after working as an executive assistant in Massachusetts after her jail sentence. Chris Dempsey She claimed that she and Chodorow, himself a longtime restaurateur, could not agree on money. 'I did my best to try and help her resurrect the restaurant in its original location. I wish her nothing but the best, but it just couldn't get done,' Chodorow told The Post. 'Obviously, we both have a perspective on why, but I'm not going to demean the process we went through in any way. I only know I tried. And she tried as well. It's a shame.' For now, Melngailis — who said she is paying her own rent on the apartment — said, 'Everything is in limbo. 'I feel like that restaurant is meant to be there,' she said of the old location. 'That restaurant — everybody wants it back. That place is so special. There's a reason why people used to describe it as special. It needs to come back in the right way, with the right energy behind it.'
Times
03-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Times
The ‘bad vegan' fell for Alec Baldwin. Then she ended up with a con man
Sarma Melngailis, 52, was an Ivy League-educated banker who founded two hit vegan restaurants in New York City, Pure Food and Wine and One Lucky Duck. But then she married a man she met on the internet and became embroiled in a scandal that was turned into the Netflix docuseries Bad Vegan. In 2015 the couple disappeared, sparking a manhunt. They were accused of defrauding Melngailis's investors after the closure of her businesses. She took a plea deal and was sentenced to four months at Rikers Island. Now, in an adapted excerpt from her memoir, The Girl with the Duck Tattoo, Melngailis tells the story of how a flirtatious friendship with the actor Alec Baldwin led her to Anthony Strangis, the man who introduced himself as 'Shane Fox'. It was midday on a Saturday in the summer of 2010, and as usual I was at my restaurant, Pure Food and Wine. I was in the cramped basement office, catching up on work. 'Hey, Alec Baldwin just came in — he's seated in the garden,' someone said, passing by the open door. 'OK, thanks,' I called out. It was normal for the staff to let me know if someone interesting came in. A few minutes later, a manager told me Alec's table had asked to speak to me. My first thought was, Really? Then, Shit. Alec Baldwin had never been to the restaurant before, and I'd never met him. I was unshowered, wearing worn-out jeans and a loose tank top. I wasn't feeling my best. Oh well. The garden was full. I felt the familiar pang of reticence at approaching any table, let alone Alec Baldwin's. Melngailis at her restaurant Pure Food and Wine in 2011 KATHY WILLENS/AP But Alec was gracious. He introduced me to his companion, a younger woman, probably about my age, with short brown hair. I kept the conversation — about our food, the restaurant, the usual — brief, not wanting to linger or overstay. Later, I was near the front door when, a few minutes after they'd walked out, Alec came back alone. He said he was waiting for a car to take him back to the Hamptons. I suggested we sit outside on the front patio. We chatted only briefly before his ride appeared. He asked for my business card. Of course, I had one ready in my back pocket to give him. Later that day, back at work on my computer, an email appeared from an address I didn't recognise. It was from Alec. In a series of witty, charming sentences, he asked if he might take me to dinner some time. I smiled. He wants to see me? A buzzy sensation rose inside me, like bubbles in a glass of champagne. Alec was performing in a play out in the Hamptons, so a few weeks passed with us emailing before we saw each other again. Meanwhile, I told my live-in boyfriend Tobyn about this correspondence, and given he was a big fan of 30 Rock, he thought it was cool. It wasn't in his nature to get jealous or make assumptions. Eventually, Alec and I arranged to have lunch at the Tuscan restaurant Beppe. Twice before, older and famous actors had asked me out, and both times I'd declined. In those cases, I got the impression they assumed I'd go out with them because they were famous. But Alec was different. He had none of that presumption. He was open and genuine, funny and kind, interesting and smart. We shared similar views on politics and animal rights. Melngailis in the kitchen of one of her restaurants NETFLIX Over the next few weeks, Alec and I kept volleying emails back and forth. I never brought up the key detail of Tobyn — that I was living with my boyfriend. Alec never asked if I was seeing anyone. The longer I waited, the weirder it got, especially as our conversations grew increasingly personal, even gently flirtatious. Finally, in one of my emails, I got around to acknowledging the minor detail of having a boyfriend — a much younger one with whom I'd been living for the past few years. Somehow, sharing Tobyn's age (he'd just turned 24) felt like it softened the conflict. Alec, at 52, was more than twice Tobyn's age. I was 37, right in the middle. I confessed to Alec that I felt conflicted, that I was sorry for not bringing it up sooner. In an email I explained, honestly, that I hadn't said anything because 'I was too busy working on being flirtatious, combined with concern that you may cease our interesting communication.' The truth was, I didn't know what I wanted. Alec's email reply to my confession about a boyfriend was understanding and, like my email, left the door wide open. In our conversations, I shared with Alec how drained and worn down I felt by the pressures of running the business. He suggested I come out to the Hamptons for a day — or however long I wanted — to get some fresh air and relax. Melngailis in Bad Vegan, released in 2022 NETFLIX He assured me I'd have my own guestroom. Eventually, I worked out that I could get away for one night, midweek, to visit Alec. For all Tobyn knew, it was a house full of people. (It was not.) I emphasised that I'd have my own room and just wanted to get out of the city for a day, that it would be fun. That Tobyn was so entirely OK with it probably should have told me something to which I ought to have paid more attention. On the bus to the Hamptons, Alec and I texted back and forth. At one point, I sent a silly text saying I'd packed a Vera Wang wedding dress. By then, we had an unspoken understanding that, despite a fondness for one another, a future together was, realistically, not realistic. Therefore, I did what I tend to do: I made jokes about what might actually have been painful. When the bus pulled up to the stop, Alec was already there. He'd just come from playing tennis and was leaning against his antique-looking BMW. It was a perfect sunny day. Already I could breathe easier. As we hugged, he apologised for being sweaty. I told him I didn't mind. We drove the short distance to his home, the tires crunching over the gravel driveway as we pulled up in front of a large, white-shingled house. The yard was manicured — tidy but not overly perfect — and birds chirped from the trees overhead. As we walked towards the front door, a pair of small white rabbits darted out from under a bush, hopping across the lawn. I said to Alec, 'I feel like we're on the set of a Disney movie.' He put his head down and spoke into the underside of his wrist. 'Cue the rabbits. I repeat, cue the rabbits.' Inside, he kicked off his tennis sneakers, so I did the same with my old navy-blue Pumas. We padded across the wide-planked, gleaming hardwood floors in our socks as he gave me a tour. Sunlight streamed through the windows. Books, papers and personal things were scattered around, and photographs covered the walls. I loved how his home wasn't overly designed. It felt lived in and comfortable. Upstairs, he showed me where I'd be sleeping — as promised, a quaint guest room. The bed was covered in plush white bedding with pillows perfectly fluffed, I presumed, by a housekeeper. For some reason, I felt unusually at ease around him, as if we'd known each other for years. As if he already knew me, and I was OK. As if everything about me was OK. Later that evening, we went to a reading Alec was scheduled to give at a local bookstore — a few chapters of Moby Dick. The place was packed. Alec was attentive, introducing me to the bookstore owners, always keeping his hand gently at the small of my back. Those already seated could easily deduce I'd arrived as Alec's companion, and I attracted some curious stares. Alec Baldwin at an event promoting his memoir, A Promise to Ourselves, in the Hamptons in 2010 ALAMY Alec started to read. I wasn't paying attention to the words, but as I listened to his voice, I felt myself drifting into a dreamy sort of daze. I started to feel some kind of pressure building inside me, as if my heart was swelling. Then I realised that a sizeable knot of emotion was threatening to exit my body in the form of tears. Oh no. Why was this happening? Then it hit me: I love this man. I loved him? How could that be? But it was. I felt it. I sat there marinating in this epiphany. A mostly happy feeling, tinged with sadness. I kept these thoughts to myself. After the reading, we went to dinner, sitting on the front porch of an old-timey sort of restaurant. It was candlelit and cosy. At one point, Alec took a photo of me on his cell phone and showed it to me. It was dark and glowy — my elbows were on the table, hands folded under my chin, and I had an actual, genuine smile on my face. I looked happy in that photo. Genuinely happy. Everything about that night felt easy and OK. But I remember wishing I could freeze time. Or, more specifically, freeze my boyfriend. Put him on ice for a while — six months maybe — so I could freely spend time with Alec. I'd gone to sleep in the guest room and woke in the morning to a text from Alec: 'Awake yet? Come in here.' So I brushed my teeth and, still in my PJs, went over to his room. I climbed onto the bed next to him, and we kissed. His mouth was minty too. Did we have hot sex? Romantic sex? Any sex? Nope. There was no pressure from him. Instead, we just lay there, comfortably tangled up, talking. I don't remember about what. I just remember it felt nice. I liked listening to him talk, hearing his stories. After a while I went back to my room to get dressed and pack. Melngailis's restaurants were among New York's most popular vegan places NETFLIX We went to breakfast at a farmer's market, and he took me on a drive around the area. We were out so long that eventually, it was time for lunch, and he drove us to a casual seaside restaurant. It was chilly with the sea breeze. After we ordered, Alec quickly got up, saying he'd be right back. A few minutes later, he returned with a pale lemon-yellow hoodie that had 'HAMPTONS' stitched across the front in white. It fit nicely over my summer dress. I was completely relaxed, and didn't want this trip to be over. But I kept thinking back to a moment from the night before. On our way back from dinner, we stopped at the ocean. I told Alec I hadn't been in the ocean in a long time, so he took me there. I told him I'd be right back and left him in the car to walk out to the water, taking off my sneakers and wading in to just below my knees. Then I thought about the opening scene in Jaws, when the girl wades into the water at night and gets eaten by a shark, so I backed out a bit. Standing there with the waves rushing over my ankles, I kept thinking about something Alec had said, in our goofy half-serious fantasy talk, about how we could be good for one another. He'd come pick me up at the restaurant at night, he'd said. My life would be easier. I considered being taken care of in that way. He'd not outright said he'd pay my debts, but it was sort of implied. Looking out at the dark expanse of the ocean, I realised this was yet another reason it would never work. I couldn't let someone just wipe out my problems for me. The dynamics of the relationship would be forever tainted by my having cost a bunch of money, by needing to be rescued, and I didn't want that. I liked being with Alec on even terms. He seemed to respect what I was doing and why I was doing it. It was soothing to be around him. Looking back now, that short Hamptons visit was like I'd been allowed to sample what a happily relaxed life could be, and how it could feel. To live without the weight of so much responsibility and debt. *** Alec and I continued emailing regularly, but the pace slowed as it became clear that I wasn't leaving Tobyn, and we were stuck in the friend zone. On a freakishly warm February evening in 2011, I was at home on the couch spooning my dog, Leon, exhausted after a long week, when my phone rang. It was Alec. 'I'm sitting on the patio at your restaurant. Where are you?' I told him I was at home, in PJs. I was exhausted. This wasn't one of those times I'd hop up, and speed-walk the six blocks to the restaurant. Our conversation was short. I texted the manager at the restaurant to make sure they looked after him. A few minutes later, my friend Justin texted, 'Where are you? I'm at your restaurant. Alec Baldwin is here!' 'I know,' I replied. Sometimes, all I wanted was a break, a quiet night, but the constant action just a few blocks away was always there. My phone pinged again. Justin texted, 'Alec's talking to a super hot brunette.' 'Cool,' I texted back, while thinking, screw off Justin, I didn't need to know that. The hot brunette Alec met at my restaurant turned out to be Hilaria Thomas — later Hilaria Baldwin, now mother of their seven kids. Alec and Hilaria Baldwin in 2013 DITMITRIOS KAMBOURIS/NBCU PHOTO BANK/NBCUNIVERSAL/GETTY IMAGES Tobyn and I split up not long after Alec began dating Hilaria. Of course it happened that way. I became available as soon as Alec wasn't. Which, in retrospect, was OK. He wanted a wife and kids, and I didn't want children. Besides, I got the sense that we'd always have been better off as just close friends anyway. I was genuinely happy for Alec. Truly. But my already low self-esteem was taking a beating. Being alone, feeling unwanted, with a bruised sense of self, I can see now, made me vulnerable. My weakened state combined with flimsy boundaries created the perfect conditions for Mr Fox to bulldoze into my life. *** Fast forward to the fall of 2011. Alec Baldwin had recently joined Twitter when I noticed him interacting with a person calling himself @DiscipleofTodd. This guy's avatar was a cartoon instead of a photo. His banter with Alec was funny and entertaining. Then he followed me, and I followed him back. He started commenting on my posts, and soon, our own back-and-forth ensued. It quickly moved to direct messages. He said his name was Shane Fox. I still didn't know much else about him, but since Alec followed him, I assumed they were friends, or at least acquaintances. Shortly after he followed me, he changed his profile picture to an actual photo. But it only showed the lower half of his face. It was a grainy black-and-white image, both odd and intriguing. I asked about the photo. Why the partial image? He responded by sending me a full photo — though his eyes were obscured by sunglasses. His full, dark hair, stubble and aviator sunglasses gave him the look of someone with a military background. His neck was solid, making him look big and strong. He seemed capable and important, but details remained vague. I was intrigued and wanted to know more. Feeling drawn to him was a gradual and steady process. Like the tide coming in. You know it's happening, but you can't see it happening. Every comment, every new reveal, moved the tide a little more. When he first told me his full name — Shane Anthony Fox — I thought, what a cool name. It never occurred to me that it wasn't real. I quickly started calling him Mr Fox, and before we had even met in person, he started calling me Mrs Fox. I liked the sound of it — Mr and Mrs Fox. As if we were characters in a movie, like Mr and Mrs Smith. He was always mysterious about his job. He said he worked in 'commercial real estate' but also vaguely hinted that his real occupation was secret. As if he was, in fact, like Brad Pitt's Mr Smith, working undercover. I wouldn't mind being Angelina Jolie, I thought. *** After nearly two months of texting and phone calls, Mr Fox finally came to see me at my apartment. Looking back now, it makes sense that he waited so long. He let the anticipation build, along with my trust in him, so that by the time he did come, I let him straight into my home. Writing this now, I'm embarrassed by my own recklessness, allowing someone about whom I'd verified nothing into my home. I was not, historically or by nature, a suspicious person. Nor was I very good at protecting myself in general. Boundaries? Not my thing. But he'd made me feel safe. I had already invested so much of my time and emotional energy in this relationship — if that's what it was — that I was eager to be alone with him. Still, I was nervous, so I started drinking beer on an empty stomach. By the time he arrived, I was a little drunk. When Mr Fox arrived, I buzzed him in, instructing him to walk to the back of the lobby and take the stairs up one flight. I went to the door, unbolted it, and cracked it open. I heard his steps, heavy and deliberate, on the staircase. Anthony Strangis, who claimed his name was Shane Fox NETFLIX His face was rounder than in his photos, which made him look less intimidating — almost sweet. Before he even set his bag down, we kissed. To my relief, he was a good kisser. He dropped his bag, and we inched our way to the couch, only a few feet from the door. He sat, and rather quickly, moving only the minimum amount of clothing needed out of the way, we had sex. I cringe writing these paragraphs. Or, more accurately, I want to vomit on the keyboard. Because I find him so wildly repulsive now. But even if he was Prince Charming, I'd still feel embarrassed. This wasn't sex on the first date. It was sex before the first date. Maybe people do this all the time now with hook-up apps, but it seems dangerous — both physically and emotionally. *** Just over a week after my encounter with Mr Fox, a voice in my head kept chiming in, 'You might be pregnant.' I didn't want to wait to see if I'd miss my period. I practically ran to CVS to buy a pregnancy test. At home, I went straight to the bathroom, tore the test from the package, and followed the instructions. And there it was — the purple plus sign appearing on the white strip. A welcome miracle for some and entirely dreaded for others. I was firmly in the latter category. There was only one path. I bolted to my computer, and quickly researched options. It didn't take long to find the right place. The next morning, I made the call, and took their soonest available appointment. The day of my procedure couldn't have come fast enough. I arrived at the Midtown office alone for the mid-morning appointment. After filling out paperwork, I changed into my paper gown and climbed up on the table equipped with stirrups. The doctor, an attractive and energetic blonde woman, treated me with gentle kindness, walking me through what to expect. I lay back, scooted down, and put one socked foot in each stirrup. That's when the doctor, who had spotted my tote bag in the corner, said, 'Oh, One Lucky Duck! I love that place so much! I go there all the time for take-out. You go there, too?' I propped up on my left elbow, pulling down my paper gown on that side to show her the matching tattoo on my shoulder. Melngailis pictured with the celebrity chef Matthew Kenney and the actor Kyle MacLachlan THEO WARGO/GETTY IMAGES 'Oh my god, that's your place! Oh wow, I love it so much. Such a great thing you're doing there!' I thanked her, feeling awkward yet appreciative. She shifted back to the task at hand. A nurse held my hand, and I squeezed back hard when it hurt the most. When it was all over, I exhaled with relief. With my clothes back on, I walked home. I didn't tell Mr Fox about any of this. I felt no reason, and certainly no obligation to. Something in my gut told me it had been deliberate on his part. I resolved never to see him again. However, I'd never been good at ghosting people — cutting off all contact. Even with my intention to pull away, I kept communicating with him. Part of me probably wanted an explanation. Something to make it all make sense. Who was he really? I figured there was little harm in staying in touch. I didn't have to agree to see him. Except eventually, of course, I did. I couldn't have fathomed how much I'd later regret having allowed him back into my home — back into my life. Later, I was diagnosed with autism-1, formerly known as Asperger's, which is more common than most people realise. Statistically women with this diagnosis have much higher odds of being manipulated in some way, and it's one more factor that probably made me a good target. It took getting arrested to set me free. Melngailis and Strangis, below, were arrested in 2016, facing 24 charges including grand larceny NETFLIX Anthony Strangis, who denied in court that he manipulated Melngailis, pleaded guilty to four charges of grand larceny in the fourth degree, criminal tax fraud and scheming to defraud. He was sentenced to five years' probation and served just over a year on remand. He remained at Rikers Island for one year awaiting trial after not being able to pay his bail charges, and was released in May 2017.
