16-05-2025
Only the hair necessities for Louis
BBC documentary maker Louis Theroux, 54, has turned down his wife Nancy's suggestion that he wear a wig to disguise his hair loss (he has been documenting his experience of alopecia on social media). He told her: 'If you think I'm the kind of guy who wears a wig, we don't know each other!'
Wig-wearing was the preserve of people like Terry Wogan or Paul Daniels, he told the Adam Buxton podcast. 'I would wear a wig as a gimmick or a joke. But if you're wearing a wig in the spirit of like, 'This is my hair'? I'm a journalist, people rely on me to try and tell the truth about things. I'd be like 'I uncovered a story…' and it'd be like, 'His hair isn't even telling the truth, I can't trust anything he says'.'
No former member of the House of Commons has died since Dafydd Elis-Thomas on February 7, Nick Comfort, who pens The Daily Telegraph's political obituaries, tells me. That's over three months ago. 'As, actuarially, at least 30 should be dying each year and so far there have been just three, this is probably the greatest rallying of politicians' collective longevity since records began,' he says.
It must be all that clean living.
Health Secretary Wes Streeting thinks people in his position should not smoke. But drinking is a different matter. He told Matt Forde's The Political Party podcast this week: 'Alcohol is my vice. I'm afraid.' Shots are out now ('I've only got one kidney because I had cancer,' he said), so he prefers a gin and slimline tonic or a pint of beer. And he adds: 'I've always got the chief medical officer to point to. He gives out public health advice, and I say, 'Do as he says, not as I do'.'
Saied Dai, whose Parliament-commissioned portrait of an austere-looking Theresa May raised eyebrows 18 months ago, has had enough of the National Portrait Gallery saying that he 'can hardly bring myself to visit'.
Dai's 2014 portrait of former Royal Ballet artistic director Dame Monica Mason has not been seen since 2018. Its absence has not gone unnoticed by Dame Monica, 83, herself. 'I am now locked away in the vaults,' she said at the Royal Society of Portrait Painters' annual exhibition. 'Maybe they are waiting until I'm no longer here to bring me out again?'
Not so fast, Dame Monica. The Gallery tells me Dai's portrait is now 'due to be displayed at a national partner's venue from next month, as part of a touring exhibition'.
Britain's Got Talent judge Simon Cowell has some advice for Sir Keir Starmer as he prepares to unveil his Brexit reset after a summit with EU Commission president Ursula von der Leyen on Monday: another referendum.
'If it was to happen again, I believe that we would vote to stay with Europe – so let's have a referendum,' he told the How To Fail podcast. 'I would do a show called 'You the Jury' [with] no politicians. I would get really smart people on the show who don't want to be in Europe, and do want to be in Europe, and then understand why it is a good idea or a bad idea.' It might need a golden buzzer to put us out of our misery.
Jonathan Brash, who was elected Labour MP for Hartlepool last year, cut his political teeth serving in the cabinet of his town's local mayor, who ran for office as H'Angus the Monkey – which is also the local football team's mascot.
H'Angus was named after the monkey supposedly washed up on Hartlepool's beach during the Napoleonic Wars and hanged in the belief that it was a French spy. Brash told me on GB News's Chopper's Political Podcast that his 'good friend' Stuart Drummond ran to be mayor 'dressed as the monkey' but that 'he took the monkey suit off when he became mayor. He's a very nice man. He endorsed me to be the MP.'
Drummond initially won power as H'Angus by offering free bananas to children. It might catch on.
I was in Tirana, Albania, for the meeting of the 47 nations of the European Political Community and looked up to see a block of flats based on the image of George Skanderbeg – a 15th-century feudal military commander who led a rebellion against the Ottoman Empire. Perhaps this could catch on in the UK.
Do any readers know of buildings which look like notable figures from our history?
Peterborough, published every Friday at 7pm, is edited by Christopher Hope. You can reach him at peterborough@
Broaden your horizons with award-winning British journalism. Try The Telegraph free for 1 month with unlimited access to our award-winning website, exclusive app, money-saving offers and more.
