14-05-2025
What To Do If Your Boss Affects Your Mental Health
A businesswoman looks stressed out at work.
getty
Having a boss who affects your mental health can be challenging. Maybe you took the job because of the company's stellar reputation. Or you might have known someone at the company when you applied. You could even be at what you initially thought was your dream job. Regardless of how you ended up at your current job, having a boss who is detrimental to you and the company culture can be disappointing. Shouting, intimidation, bullying– these are just a few ways a bad boss can affect your mental health. Dr. Nicole DeKay, principal consultant at Humanalysts LLC, believes that workplace bullying should be addressed with urgency— and not just for mental health related reasons.
'Bullying bosses are expensive and it should be an organizational priority to stop bullying when it happens. A study by Gallup found that poor management (and its associated loss of productivity) cost $8.8 trillion a year, or 9% of the US GDP,' said the Seattle based industrial-organizational psychologist. 'A boss has more impact on your health than your doctor or therapist. Their impact is about equal to your partners. Bosses are absolutely in a position to affect the mental health of the people who work for them, even though it's often unrecognized and ignored,' she said. So, is your boss affecting your mental health? Here's what you can do to protect your peace.
Mentors are a great resource when it comes to managing a difficult job. You may have a mentor who has experienced similar challenges. If you speak to someone with years of experience, they will likely be able to provide sage advice on how to handle your situation. Plus, if you're looking for a new job a mentor can introduce you to people who are hiring. Make sure that when you speak to your mentor that you specifically ask for advice not how to get a job. At the end of the conversation ask if there is anyone else they recommend you speak with. When you speak to new people try not to get too personal.
It's important to note that you have already established a relationship with your mentor. You shouldn't speak too candidly about your current boss to someone you don't know well. Also, I recommend that you speak with more than one person about how to deal with your boss affecting your mental health. Ask yourself: do I have more than one mentor? If yes, speak to several of them. If you only have one mentor head to LinkedIn, track down experts in your industry, and get on calls with as many people as you can.
Having support from a therapist can go a long way when dealing with work-related problems. A therapist can recommend healthy coping skills for dealing with a boss who affects your mental health. They can suggest grounding techniques and ask insightful questions. They will listen to you without judgment. Therapy can definitely benefit you while managing stress from work. I spoke with licensed clinical psychologist and coach Dr. Kimani Norrington-Sands about mental health and the workplace. She said that 'when there is a change in baseline functioning and someone is experiencing physical and/or psychological symptoms, it is important to initially get a physical to rule out any physical issues and also consult with a therapist.' Unfortunately, stress can impact your physical and mental health. For example, some professionals get severe migraines due to work-related stress.
It's incredibly important to safeguard your mental and physical well-being. When I spoke to Dr. Norrington-Sands, she identified signs that your boss may be affecting your mental health. 'Some signs may include: anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress symptoms, difficulties sleeping, difficulties eating, agitation, crying on the way to work/leaving work/in the bathroom, preoccupation with the job outside of work hours, suicidal ideation, etc.,' she told me.
She had plenty to say about how seeing a therapist can help someone who's experiencing workplace issues due to leadership. 'Based upon the individual's presenting issues, a therapist may initially explore the possibility of taking a leave of absence for some reprieve from the toxic stress in the workplace. A therapist may also work with the individual regarding identifying/utilizing relaxation strategies such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided visualization. A therapist may explore with the individual the costs/benefits of staying at the job as well as options for exit planning,' she said.
If your boss is affecting your mental health it may be time to look for other jobs. Start by going on LinkedIn to change your job preferences. List that you are open to work if your employer can't see your LinkedIn or isn't on LinkedIn at all. You can enter specific job titles you are interested in and receive recommendations from LinkedIn every day. You can also specify what type of employment you are seeking out (contract, temporary, part-time, or full-time). Update your skills and experience to align with jobs you plan to apply to. Remember that it's better to leave a job once you've found another one. But making the decision to leave a job is far from simple.
According to Dr. DeKay, the decision of whether to find another job depends on a variety of factors. 'Some bosses are able to be coached – if you feel like you can talk to your boss and offer them better ways to manage you that would impact you less, this can be a solution. If the situation likely won't change, if they've tried to address the behavior directly and it hasn't worked, if they've elevated it and said something, then yes. They should look for a new job. Just like you shouldn't stay in an abusive domestic relationship, you shouldn't accept being abused by a boss,' she said.
