Latest news with #caregiver
The Guardian
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Guardian
My cultural awakening: A Timothée Chalamet drama made me leave my partner – and check him into rehab
Two summers ago, I met a man on a dating app who would become my boyfriend. The red flags were there from the start, but I ignored them all. When I stayed at his, he didn't have a towel to offer me, and he never changed his sheets. It became obvious that he didn't know how to look after himself. Even though, in reality, he could survive without me (similar to how a teenage boy would survive on his own, eating burgers in bed), I felt like, if I wasn't there to buy groceries, cook and clean, he might die. He would disappear for days, on a drink- or drugs-fuelled bender, and I'd assume he'd overdosed in a basement somewhere. I lived in fear that something terrible would happen to him. I became his boyfriend and his caregiver. This was a familiar role for me: I'd done it in all my previous relationships. I needed to be needed. If the person I was dating didn't need me, then what value did I have? I found safety in taking care of someone. This started as a family dynamic: as the eldest child, I had to look out for my younger brothers, and learned to overlook my own needs. Then, when I was 14, my girlfriend died in a drug-related car accident. My therapist helped me to see the connection; that because I couldn't save her, I sought romantic relationships with men or women I thought I could save instead. One evening, after being recommended it by Netflix, I began watching Beautiful Boy, a film about the breakdown of a father's relationship with his son, who is an addict. It was about halfway through that I decided to leave my relationship. When Steve Carell's character (David) hangs up on Timothée Chalamet (Nic), saying, 'I wish I could help you, but I can't do that,' I knew I couldn't either. I admired the strength it took to end the cycle of trying (and failing) to save his son. Even though he was my boyfriend and three years older, I related to the father-son dynamic in Beautiful Boy. I felt responsible for him, and he would tell me that he would die without me, threatening to take his own life. Until then, I hadn't seen how much I was damaging myself by trying to help him. And that I would never be able to, not really. He had to learn how to take care of himself. As David says: 'I don't think you can save people.' Despite deciding to end the relationship in September 2023, I didn't take action until October, when I cheated on him. I felt I had to do something irreparable that would make it impossible for us to stay together. I told him what I'd done over the phone, then I called his mum to tell her about his drug problem. I don't think she knew: she lived in another country and he hid it from her. Finally, I called a psychiatric facility and did all of the admin to make sure that he would be taken care of, and then never spoke to him again. The guilt I felt was overpowered by the feeling that this was something I had to do. That was my last codependent relationship. I have a new boyfriend, who tells me that my company alone is enough. I'm the most peaceful I've ever been, but sometimes the voice that says I'm only lovable if I'm useful comes back. If I try to cook for my boyfriend when I'm tired and he tells me I don't have to, I can spiral. But slowly, with help, I'm building a sense of self that doesn't rely on being of service. Beautiful Boy helped me see that I don't need to take care of someone else to have value. Sign up to Inside Saturday The only way to get a look behind the scenes of the Saturday magazine. Sign up to get the inside story from our top writers as well as all the must-read articles and columns, delivered to your inbox every weekend. after newsletter promotion You can tell us how a cultural moment has prompted you to make a major life change by filling in the form below or emailing us on Please include as much detail as possible Please note, the maximum file size is 5.7 MB. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. If you include other people's names please ask them first. Action on Addiction is available on 0300 330 0659.
Yahoo
26-05-2025
- Yahoo
1-year-old New Mexico boy dies after being left in truck for several hours: Police
A 1-year-old boy died after he was left in a caregiver's truck for several hours, police in New Mexico said, calling it a "very tragic incident." Police responded to a home in Albuquerque on Sunday after the child was found unresponsive in the caregiver's truck, according to Albuquerque Police Department spokesman Gilbert Gallegos. The cause of death is pending an autopsy, though heat appears to have been a factor, Gallegos said. Police have not released the name of the child. MORE: Mom arrested after 2-year-old child found alone in hot car: Police The child's parents had left the boy in the care of a male relative who lived at the home around mid-morning, Gallegos said. When family members contacted the relative later that day, the young adult realized the child was not inside, Gallegos said. Family members attempted CPR until first responders arrived some time after 5 p.m., Gallegos said. "They tried for a long time to revive the child. Unfortunately, the child died at the scene," Gallegos said during a press briefing on Monday. Gallegos said he did not know the temperature inside the truck or exactly how long the child was left inside it, but that it was "several hours for certain." No arrests have been made and the local district attorney's office is not filing charges at this time, Gallegos said. Detectives interviewed the relative as well as a number of other family members and neighbors, Gallegos said. The relative had left on foot before officers arrived at the scene, but returned to the home, Gallegos said. "His relatives speculated that he was just traumatized," Gallegos said. "They said he was a good person but he was just in shock when this happened." MORE: 5-year-old boy dies after being left in hot car for 7 hours; foster mom arrested: Police The incident remains under investigation. Officers had contacted the New Mexico Children, Youth and Families Department and the department is not aware of any history involving the family, according to Gallegos. "It's a really tragic incident, and our detectives are still investigating to try to get to the bottom of what happened," Gallegos said. Prior to this incident, three children in the United States have died in hot cars so far this year, according to the national nonprofit Kids and Car Safety. On average, nearly 40 children die in hot cars in the U.S. each year, according to the organization. 1-year-old New Mexico boy dies after being left in truck for several hours: Police originally appeared on
Yahoo
26-05-2025
- Yahoo
1-year-old New Mexico boy dies after being left in truck for several hours: Police
A 1-year-old boy died after he was left in a caregiver's truck for several hours, police in New Mexico said, calling it a "very tragic incident." Police responded to a home in Albuquerque on Sunday after the child was found unresponsive in the caregiver's truck, according to Albuquerque Police Department spokesman Gilbert Gallegos. The cause of death is pending an autopsy, though heat appears to have been a factor, Gallegos said. Police have not released the name of the child. MORE: Mom arrested after 2-year-old child found alone in hot car: Police The child's parents had left the boy in the care of a male relative who lived at the home around mid-morning, Gallegos said. When family members contacted the relative later that day, the young adult realized the child was not inside, Gallegos said. Family members attempted CPR until first responders arrived some time after 5 p.m., Gallegos said. "They tried for a long time to revive the child. Unfortunately, the child died at the scene," Gallegos said during a press briefing on Monday. Gallegos said he did not know the temperature inside the truck or exactly how long the child was left inside it, but that it was "several hours for certain." No arrests have been made and the local district attorney's office is not filing charges at this time, Gallegos said. Detectives interviewed the relative as well as a number of other family members and neighbors, Gallegos said. The relative had left on foot before officers arrived at the scene, but returned to the home, Gallegos said. "His relatives speculated that he was just traumatized," Gallegos said. "They said he was a good person but he was just in shock when this happened." MORE: 5-year-old boy dies after being left in hot car for 7 hours; foster mom arrested: Police The incident remains under investigation. Officers had contacted the New Mexico Children, Youth and Families Department and the department is not aware of any history involving the family, according to Gallegos. "It's a really tragic incident, and our detectives are still investigating to try to get to the bottom of what happened," Gallegos said. Prior to this incident, three children in the United States have died in hot cars so far this year, according to the national nonprofit Kids and Car Safety. On average, nearly 40 children die in hot cars in the U.S. each year, according to the organization. 1-year-old New Mexico boy dies after being left in truck for several hours: Police originally appeared on
The Review Geek
23-05-2025
- Entertainment
- The Review Geek
Forget You Not – Season 1 Episode 8 Recap, Review & Ending Explained
If You Forget, I Will Remember It All For You Episode 8 of Forget You Not starts this finale with Le-le struggling to find a caregiver for Kuang-chi. Yani is not here, so Le-le needs to take him to the hospital alone. She's barely sleeping, she's handling a lot and she's struggling to keep it all together. Le-le continues to show up late to work at the Mart too and she's reprimanded by her boss. He's contemplating whether to let her go on given how unreliable she is and he doesn't want to hear about her personal issues either. For now, she's allowed to keep working but Le-le is not doing herself any favours here. Le-le tries to put on a brave face and although she's not a mother, she has become one to Kuang-chi. This offer to move out to Singapore with Kai is still floating around in her mind but she can't go anywhere right now as she needs to look after her father. How is Le-le feeling? Le-le is feeling alone but she's also absolutely exhausted. She's dealing with overwhelming guilt as a result of all this too, which she vents to her father about. She likens her life to trying to hold onto sand, with the grains of her life slipping through her fingers without being able to hold onto anything substantial. That night, things take a turn for the worst when Kuang-chi is brought into hospital again, this time with pneumonia from choking. Le-le is there with him but it's clear that his condition isn't getting any easier here. Back home, Le-le shows off the old family photos to her dad and all these memories work well to recontextualize their relationship over the years. It's a nice way of showing Le-le embracing the good and the bad times from the past, but without the unreliable narration that she's been plagued with much of the season. What happens after Kuang-chi's death? When Kuang-chi does pass away though, Le-le seems to be handling it well but she's detached and very much coasting her way through the days. She closes the bank accounts, boxes up all his possessions and starts to work her way through the grief. While sorting through the old gear, Le-le finds a camcorder Kuang-chi has and there's a video there for her. Turns out Kuang-chi has made a whole bunch of recordings as a way of showing she's not fully alone, especially after her mother left. These videos works really well to help Le-le work through the list of acquaintances and friends that have helped Kuang-chi all this time. Interestingly, this also reconceptualizes her feelings about Kuang-chi and now that he's gone, she realizes how cold and standoffish she's been with him all these years. From the blunt calls to berating him for not putting her first, Le-le lets her tears fall. Her dad's words strike a chord with her, especially when he does another video and tells her that one day he'll not be there and she'll slowly forget him. It's a sobering examination of how this man feels about his coming death, and something that Le-le also had to handle now too. How does Forget You Not end? Funnily enough, this entire ordeal has caused Su-fei to rethink her current campaign at the agency too, while Le-le gets back on stage and does another comedy routine. She mentions Kuang-chi's death but this time, she mixes it in with humour and sentimentality. Le-le is also humble too, bringing up how she needs the Talk Show and points out how lucky she is to have the crowd hang on her every word. She eventually gets a round Of applause when she decides to keep her dad's wishes of searching for aliens alive. It's something that I've not mentioned in these recaps but its been a running theme throughout these 8 episodes. Le-le is determined to keep his memory alive and wants to keep talking about Kuang-chi so his memory will never fade. Le-le decides she's going to continue mining her father as a source of comedy and has now come to realize how much she does love her dad. The Episode Review It's hard not to shed a tear at the end as Forget You Not closes things out with a beautifully sentimental conclusion that wraps up our central conflict. Le-le finally comes to realize how much she's needed her father, who has always been this constant figure in her life that she's taken for granted until it's too late. It's a sobering reminder of how we take our parents for granted and how, one day, they wont be there anymore and it can feel like the whole sky has fallen down on top of us. The show captures that core essence beautifully and the characterisation has been on-point throughout. The show very much plays out as a slice of life drama rather than an uplifting or overly whimsical piece. This could be one of the underrated gems this year, and as far as Asian dramas go, this one's definitely a great watch. It's a sobering reminder that our time on this planet is finite and we should take advantage of every second of it. Previous Episode Expect A Full Season Write-Up When This Season Concludes!
Free Malaysia Today
21-05-2025
- Free Malaysia Today
7-year-old dies after falling from 29th floor of Puchong condo
Preliminary findings showed that the seven-year-old girl climbed out of the window, which had no safety grills installed. PETALING JAYA : A seven-year-old girl died yesterday after falling from the 29th floor of a condominium in Puchong, Subang Jaya. Subang Jaya deputy police chief Fairus Jaafar said officers were dispatched promptly after receiving a distress call at around 12.30pm. 'Investigations found the victim lying face-up on the fifth floor of the building after falling from the babysitter's home,' he said in a statement today. Fairus said further investigations found no criminal elements involved. 'The victim's mother was taking care of another child who was under home quarantine, and the father was at work during the incident. 'Preliminary findings indicate that the victim climbed out of the window, which had no safety grills installed,' he said. A medical officer at the scene confirmed the girl's death. Police have also recorded a statement from the caregiver for further investigation. The case is being investigated under Section 31(1)(a) of the Child Act 2001, which carries a maximum penalty of a RM50,000 fine, up to 20 years' imprisonment, or both upon conviction.
