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Yahoo
2 days ago
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
13 Phrases People Say When They're Secretly Over You
Navigating relationships can be tricky, especially when it seems like someone might be pulling away. You start to notice the little things—or maybe the lack of them. If you're sensing a shift in someone's attitude toward you, it might be time to pay attention to the subtle cues people give off when they're ready to move on. Here are 13 phrases people might say when they're secretly over you. 1. 'I've Just Got So Much On Right Now.' People often use the "busy" excuse as a way to create distance without having to confront the real issue. It's a simple way to skirt around the awkward conversation about why they're not as interested anymore. When someone keeps saying they're too busy, yet you see them making time for other activities, it's a red flag. According to relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, consistent communication is key to maintaining strong connections. So, when someone keeps defaulting to busyness, it might be time to evaluate how they prioritize their relationships. This phrase is often paired with other vague statements that imply a lack of time or energy. You might hear things like, 'I've got a lot on my plate right now,' or 'I'm swamped with work.' These generalities can be a way to shield themselves from having to share deeper feelings. It's worth noting if this pattern is consistent because, over time, it speaks volumes about their level of commitment. At the end of the day, everyone is busy, but people make time for what—or who—matters to them. 2. 'Let's Just See How Things Go.' When someone throws out this phrase, it's often a sign they're putting things on hold without making any concrete plans for the future. It's a casual way of saying they're not ready to invest more into the relationship. This non-committal attitude can leave you in a state of limbo, unsure of where you truly stand. Instead of being upfront about their feelings, they choose this middle ground that leaves both parties hanging. It's a strategy that keeps you around without the promise of anything more. Hearing 'let's just see how things go' could mean they're waiting for something better to come along. It's about keeping options open, which isn't fair if you're looking for more clarity. Relationships thrive on mutual understanding and shared goals, and vague expressions like this one can be a way to avoid making decisions. If you hear this repeatedly, it's worth having a conversation to seek clearer direction. Otherwise, you might end up waiting for something that never solidifies. 3. 'We Should Catch Up Sometime.' This phrase is one of those friendly yet non-specific suggestions that often never comes to fruition. It's easy to say but rarely followed by concrete plans, which can be frustrating. Psychologist Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne notes that genuine relationships require time and effort, not just vague gestures. When someone genuinely wants to maintain a connection, they make an effort to set a specific time and date. This phrase, however, often serves as a placeholder with little intention behind it. Instead of leading to an actual meet-up, 'we should catch up sometime' often becomes a conversation-ender. It's a way for someone to express interest in a non-committal way without having to follow through. If you notice this pattern, it might be a sign that their priorities have shifted away from you. Whether it's due to a change in interests or availability, it's important to recognize when lukewarm statements are a form of distancing. Holding onto these vague promises can lead to disappointment. 4. 'I'm Focused On Myself Right Now.' While self-focus is important, when someone uses this phrase, it can be a way to gently back away from a relationship. It's often said when they want to shift their energy elsewhere but don't want to hurt your feelings. This statement can be confusing because it's not necessarily negative; it just indicates a change in priorities. However, if their focus on themselves leaves no room for you, it's a clear sign the relationship isn't a priority. It's important to understand the difference between genuine self-care and a convenient excuse to exit. People might use this phrase when they're experiencing personal challenges or simply want to explore life on their own terms. It's a respectable desire, but the impact on the relationship can't be ignored. If you find that their focus on themselves leaves you consistently on the sidelines, it's worth addressing. Having an open conversation about what 'focused on myself' truly means can offer clarity. After all, relationships thrive on balance, and if your needs aren't being met, it might be time to reconsider. 5. 'I Didn't Get Your Message.' This is one of those excuses that can feel both frustrating and baffling. In today's connected world, missing a message seems almost impossible, yet this phrase is surprisingly common. According to communication expert Deborah Tannen, people often use this tactic to avoid uncomfortable conversations. It's an indirect way to express disinterest, as though by 'missing' your message, they've evaded the need to reply. If this is a recurring issue, it might be time to consider the real message behind the missed message. While everyone can overlook a message from time to time, repeated occurrences suggest a deeper issue. It might indicate that they're not prioritizing communication with you. When someone is genuinely invested, they make an effort to respond, even if it's just to say they're busy. If you notice this pattern, it's worth addressing how important communication is to both of you. Ignored messages can lead to feelings of neglect and frustration, neither of which are conducive to a healthy relationship. 6. 'I'm Not Ready For Anything Serious.' This phrase is a straightforward way of saying they're not looking for a deeper connection. It's clear, yet it often leaves room for false hope if you're hoping for more. When someone says they're not ready for anything serious, it's a signal to reassess your own expectations. While casual relationships can be fulfilling, if you're looking for something more, this phrase should be a prompt to evaluate compatibility. It's about understanding where both parties stand and whether those positions align. People use this phrase to set boundaries without explicitly saying they're not interested in progressing things. It's honest, but it's important to take it at face value rather than trying to read between the lines. If you stay in the relationship, hoping they'll change their mind, you might face unnecessary disappointment. Accepting this statement can save you from investing in something that's not going to develop further. Open communication can help both parties understand what they're looking for moving forward. 7. 'You're Overthinking It.' This phrase can often dismiss your feelings and concerns, making you second-guess yourself. It's a way to deflect from the real issues by placing the responsibility back on you. According to Dr. Brene Brown, empathy is essential in meaningful conversations, and dismissive language like this often lacks that quality. When someone tells you you're overthinking, it can stifle important discussions and prevent resolution. It's crucial to recognize when your feelings are being invalidated in this way. Being told you're overthinking can make you doubt your instincts and intuition. While it's natural to analyze situations, being consistently labeled as overreacting can be damaging. It's important to express how this phrase makes you feel and to seek a more supportive dialogue. Relationships should be a space where both people can share their thoughts freely without fear of dismissal. If you frequently encounter this phrase, it might be time to evaluate the level of empathy in your relationship. 8. 'I'm Not In A Good Place Right Now.' This phrase can be a way of indicating that they're not emotionally available. It's a candid comment, often used as a defense to avoid deeper engagement. While everyone goes through rough patches, consistently hearing this phrase might suggest a lack of interest in growing the relationship. When someone says they're not in a good place, it's worth considering whether it's a temporary state or an ongoing pattern. Emotional availability is crucial for a thriving relationship, and it's important to assess if both parties are on the same page. Using this phrase can be a way to retract from emotional responsibilities without directly addressing them. It's not about rejecting you, but rather about where they see themselves in their personal journey. If there's no sign of progress or willingness to discuss how to move forward, it might be time to reconsider the relationship. Acknowledging when someone isn't ready or able to invest emotionally can be crucial for your own well-being. It allows you to make informed decisions about where you want to go from here. 9. 'You Deserve Someone Better.' While this may seem like a compliment, it often signals an impending exit. It's a way of saying they don't want to be the one in the relationship, masked by an attempt at flattery. This phrase shifts the focus away from their desire to leave by implying they're thinking of your best interests. It can be confusing because it leaves you feeling both complimented and rejected simultaneously. Understanding this as a sign of their disengagement can provide clarity and help you make informed choices. People might use this phrase when they feel inadequate or when they simply want out. It's an indirect way to express a lack of desire to continue without appearing harsh. While the sentiment may be genuine, it's important to recognize it as a cue that they're pulling away. If someone truly believes you deserve better, it's worth considering that this might be their way of saying goodbye. This phrase is often a gentle letdown wrapped in seemingly considerate language. 10. 'I Don't Know What I Want.' Ambivalence in relationships can be frustrating and confusing. This phrase is often used when someone is uncertain about their feelings or the direction of the relationship. It indicates a lack of commitment and can leave you feeling stuck in uncertainty. While it's fair to be unsure at times, consistently hearing this phrase might suggest they're not ready to invest in the relationship. Understanding what you both want is crucial to moving forward or deciding to part ways. This phrase can often lead to a cycle of indecision, leaving you to wonder where you stand. Rather than providing clarity, it keeps things vague and unresolved. If you're consistently met with this uncertainty, it's worth having an open conversation about your expectations and desires. Ambiguity can be detrimental to building a strong foundation, and addressing it head-on can provide the answers you need. Open dialogue can help determine if there's potential for growth or if it's time to let go. 11. 'I'm Just Not Good At Relationships.' This phrase puts the responsibility on them and their perceived shortcomings. It's a way of acknowledging failure without taking actionable steps to change. While self-awareness can be positive, using it as an excuse to avoid working on the relationship isn't fair. When someone says this, it's worth questioning their willingness to grow and adapt. Relationships require effort and the ability to learn from mistakes, not just acceptance of perceived inadequacies. People might say this as a way to manage your expectations or to justify their behavior. It serves as a shield to any criticism about how they handle relationship dynamics. However, if you're looking for growth and improvement, this might not be what you want to hear. Understanding whether this is a genuine struggle or an excuse can help you decide how to proceed. It's about knowing when to support them and when to recognize that they might not be willing to change. 12. 'I Think We're On Different Pages.' This phrase is often used when people recognize a fundamental disconnect in their goals or values. It's a straightforward acknowledgment of differences that might be hard to reconcile. While it can be disappointing to hear, it's also an honest assessment of where things stand. Recognizing different priorities can lead to more productive conversations about whether compromise is possible. It's about understanding whether the differences can be bridged or if it's time to part ways amicably. When someone says this, it often means they've considered the compatibility of the relationship. It's an opportunity to evaluate whether your visions for the future align. While it might signal an end, it can also be a chance to address disparities and find common ground. If both parties are willing, this phrase can lead to a deeper understanding and potential growth. However, if it's a consistent theme, it might be time to accept that your paths are diverging. 13. 'I Need Some Space.' This phrase is often a request for time away from the relationship to gain clarity. It's not always a negative thing; sometimes, it's necessary for personal reflection. However, if you hear this frequently, it might indicate a deeper issue of avoidance. When someone consistently asks for space, it could be a sign they're struggling with the commitment required. Communication about what 'space' means and how long it's expected to last can help prevent misunderstandings. People request space for various reasons, from needing a break to reassessing their feelings. It's essential to respect this request while also setting boundaries for your own emotional well-being. Understanding the reasons behind their need for space can offer insight into their perspective. However, if the request for space becomes a recurring theme without resolution, it might be time to reassess the future of the relationship. Clear communication can help navigate these requests constructively. Solve the daily Crossword
Wall Street Journal
18-07-2025
- Sport
- Wall Street Journal
The Major Where Playing ‘Old Man Golf' Is Still a Winner
Brian Harman looks like the exact type of golfer who should struggle in the modern game. In an age when bigger, stronger players are hitting the ball farther than ever, the 5-foot-7 Harman can't match the distance of most of his peers. It isn't unusual for other players in his group to smash their drives dozens of yards farther than his.
Washington Post
16-07-2025
- General
- Washington Post
Carolyn Hax: Soon-to-be grandma crowds pregnant daughter with her entitlement
Hi, Carolyn! I am in my third trimester with twins, and they will be the first grandchildren on both sides. Needless to say, our mothers are foaming at the mouth to meet these kiddos. They both live halfway across the country, so dropping by unannounced is not a worry of ours. My mother-in-law is the one who tends to cross boundaries, but as the due date looms, my own mother is the one already driving me nuts. It's been a real disappointment, as she is typically the more chill of the two.
Yahoo
21-06-2025
- General
- Yahoo
Woman Says She Will No Longer Participate in Her Boyfriend's Family Events After Several Slights: ‘I Don't Feel Welcome'
A woman shared on Reddit that she and her boyfriend have been kept at a distance by his family The woman was upset that her boyfriend's sister-in-law didn't postpone her pregnancy announcement for a few days so that the couple could be present The woman now refuses to attend any family events due to feeling slightedA woman claims her boyfriend's family has kept her at a distance — and now she doesn't want to have anything to do with them. In a post on Reddit's "Am I the A------" forum, the 31-year-old woman detailed her fractured relationship with her boyfriend's family. The couple has been together for almost three years, and in the beginning, his family members 'were kind and really put in effort to get to know me," the OP (original poster) said. "His sister (27F) and his sister-in-law (29F) would text me to plan dinner together, we'd work out together, etc. The feeling was mutual," she continued. But then things began to change. 'Slowly, I've noticed them both distancing themselves from me with no apparent reason to my knowledge,' she wrote. According to the OP, her boyfriend's brother once reached out to ask if the couple wanted to go to Hawaii with him and his wife. The OP and her boyfriend took a few hours to consider and then said yes. 'His brother responds back saying 'never mind, we decided to go with a smaller group' essentially just removing us since everyone else was still going,' she claimed. 'They went on their trip and blocked me and my bf from seeing their social media stories (to this day we're still blocked but haven't spoken up about it to them). There was never an apology or an attempt to communicate what happened, it was just swept under the rug.' The OP also mentioned another incident in which the family had texted them to come over on a Thursday night. She and her boyfriend couldn't attend, but told the family they would see them that Sunday, which was Father's Day. 'The sister texts us a video that night that the SIL/brother are announcing their first pregnancy and that we missed it," she wrote. "There was no attempt to reschedule the announcement so that we could all be present for it. They could've easily said the news on Father's Day, just days later.' Feeling upset and slighted, the woman had a conversation with her boyfriend and expressed her 'concerns that his family is making it clear they don't value our presence." "Whenever we go over to the family home, it feels like everyone goes quiet and dilutes their personality until we leave," she noted. The conversation ended with the OP telling her boyfriend that she will no longer attend his family's events, nor will she congratulate the sister-in-law on her pregnancy due to her "standoffish" behavior. 'I will not go where I don't feel welcome. Today he went to the family home alone and I stayed at home," the OP finished her post, asking fellow Redditors, "AITA [am I the a------]?" For many users, the answer was a resounding yes. Some suggested that she was wrongly perceiving certain situations as slights. 'You can't expect someone to postpone their pregnancy announcement — they invited you, and they shared the video afterwards," one person wrote. "They are allowed to keep that separate from Father's Day, and to share the information with people separately. And refusing to congratulate his SIL is just churlish. It is almost always better to build bridges than burn them." Others questioned whether the woman was leaving facts out of her post to explain why there is a perceived distance between her and the boyfriend's family. 'This sounds a bit like a situation where there are missing reasons somewhere,' a reader said. 'The expectation that they postpone pregnancy announcement is too much." The same reader suspected that the family 'slowly distanced themselves for some reasons you are choosing to not analyze.' However, other commenters sympathized with the OP — particularly regarding the Hawaii invite that was rescinded — and encouraged a direct conversation. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. 'I'd want closure, and if I have to make family dinner awkward for everyone to get that closure, I will,' one person wrote. 'Then let them know that since they don't see you as family, that you will not be treating them as such and simply cut them off.' Read the original article on People
