Latest news with #sexualdesire
Yahoo
2 days ago
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
TURN-ON TIPS: Avoid these foreplay fails that lead to bad sex
Sex doesn't always have to be about the act of sex. The fun time leading up to it can be just as good, sometimes great, and maybe even better — if you know what you're doing and what to expect. That said, if foreplay isn't your forte, there are ways to fix that. Alexa Johnston, a sex and relationship expert at Just, Australia's online adult toy store, let us know how to turn around some of the biggest flops in the bedroom so it's more about getting it on than getting it wrong. Great sex starts long before anyone gets naked. 'Sexual desire isn't just physical — it's mental and emotional too,' Johnston said. 'If there's no build-up with things like flirty messages, affectionate touches, or even a sense of connection, your body might not get the memo that it's go time.' If foreplay feels like something you tick off a checklist, then that's not allowing sufficient arousal time, Johnston said. 'Rushing straight to intercourse means the body doesn't get the chance to respond fully, which can significantly reduce the chances of orgasm.' Verbal and non-verbal gaffes can cause a partner to fumble, leading to missed opportunities for the kind of stimulation that can lead to that mind-blowing feeling. 'Everyone has different turn-ons, and those preferences can change,' Johnston explained. 'Assuming you just know what your partner likes is a risky game.' While some people are into the AI thing, not everyone wants to romp with a robot. 'Doing the exact same moves every time can make foreplay feel like a routine rather than something exciting,' Johnston said. 'The lack of variety can lead to boredom, and boredom is the enemy of arousal.' No, orgasms are not what most people love about sex, study finds SEX FILES: Why cooking together might be the ultimate relationship hack SEX FILES: Out of sync in the bedroom? You might be experiencing desire discrepancy The G-spot isn't the only spot, so don't forget those overlooked areas, Johnston advised. We're looking at you, neck, inner thighs, lower back and, yes, even the scalp. While some people need that slow, sensual build-up, others thrive on faster, more intense stimulation, so it's a matter of coming together in a way that works for all. 'Finding the right rhythm together is key. If one partner rushes while the other needs more time (or vice versa), it can lead to frustration and missed orgasms,' Johnston detailed. The good news is that all these missteps are fixable, she assures. 'Building mental and emotional arousal with flirtation and affection creates anticipation and amplifies desire,' Johnston said. 'Taking the time to slow down and immerse yourselves in foreplay means your bodies will be fully prepared for pleasure rather than simply rushing straight to intercourse.'
The Sun
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Sun
I've been with my husband for years and he does everything right – but I have to pretend he's someone else to enjoy sex
A WOMAN has admitted to fantasising about having sex with other men despite claiming her husband is perfect. The mum-of-two said she was 'craving' sex with a new partner and regularly dreamt about it while having intercourse with her husband. The couple has been together for ten years, and while she said the sex life was healthy and regular, she couldn't help but think of other people. Asking for advice on Mumsnet, the woman shared: "I have a decent marriage, no complaints in any area. "I have a good husband and a nice life. We are early 30s with two young children. "Just lately, I've been craving sex with a different man - no man in particular, just not my husband!" She revealed the pair had gotten together quite young and didn't experiment much before becoming exclusive. "I don't understand why, other than we've been together since we were 20 and we both have limited sexual experience before one another (though I have slept with two other guys in my teens)," she explained. "Maybe I feel like I missed out, I'm not sure." She added: "DH has a high sex drive and we have sex most days. He is extremely attentive and knows exactly what I like. He is good in bed. "But I have to pretend that he's someone else in order to enjoy it! I've been drinking a lot in the evenings to deal with this." The woman also said she was unsure as to why she felt this way and if anybody else had similar experiences. Geordie Shore star reveals she's FINALLY had sex again after being celibate for nearly three years One wrote: "This is a massive, massive concern and I implore you to get help right away. You are on a very slippery slope, and you need professional help to figure out why you need alcohol to cope." They added: "You have a husband who loves you and two beautiful children who need their mum to be happy and healthy. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and alcohol can take that all away from you. "Alcohol is not your friend. Please reach out to whomever you feel you can for support, and please seek professional guidance." Another suggested: "Could you bring that fantasy into the bedroom and maybe ask him to role play for you? Or if there's an accent that really turns you on ask him to whisper to you in that voice? Maybe you could turn this into a nice kink that involves him!" A third chimed in: "He's probably doing the same, almost all guys dream of other women they want to have sex with while making love to their wives and pretend they are a different woman. "It's harmless if that's all it is. Pretending you or someone else gives him a thrill and makes sex easier just as it does for you. It's ok." "I think it's natural to fantasise about sex with other people some of the time but not to the extent of not wanting sex with your DH," a fourth added. "You did get together and settle down pretty young so that probably is contributing to how you feel. But he sounds like a great guy. "There are a lot of s**theads out there. So be careful not to wish him away. If your DCs are very young, your relationship with your DH may seem more about you as parents than anything else. "You will likely find you start to relate to each other more just as adults once your children are a bit older and not absorbing quite as much of your time."
