Latest news with #singleparenthood
Yahoo
5 days ago
- Health
- Yahoo
I Felt Terrified To Raise A Baby Girl In This World. Then, 5 Words From My OB-GYN Gave Me Hope.
At 38 years old, after a breakup, a move and a series of dating app experiences that served only to provide my comedian friend with material for an entire year of stand-up shows, I decided to pursue single parenthood. For me, motherhood had always been a dream, both in that it's been a lifelong desire and seemed as unattainable as most dreams do. Some of this stemmed from societal assumptions of parenthood; a two-parent household that is preceded by dates wildly more successful than any I'd ever been on, followed by marriage, and, even in this era of delayed pregnancy and scientific breakthroughs in assisted reproduction, the loud ticking of a biological clock. And, more pressingly and personally: Did I deserve the responsibility, joys, and privileges of motherhood? A lifetime of often-crushing people-pleasing and imposter syndrome, coupled with the prospect of an administration that almost immediately began to roll back access to reproductive healthcare and instituted critical threats to human rights, plagued my first trimester even more than my newly fluctuating hormones. Compared to so many others, I was lucky. It was an easy subway ride to the fertility clinic, and I snagged early morning appointments that barely interfered with work. I sent emails from the beautifully appointed waiting room of the Midtown office, and joked with the nurses who had the misfortune of taking my blood for the overwhelming battery of tests required for any fertility journey. Sometimes, I walked the three miles home from the clinic, stopping for a toasted bagel with vegan cream cheese from my favorite bodega and handing out information on New York's Prop 1 ballot initiative and voter registration packets along the way. And, though I hadn't dared to let myself believe it would, could work, the third pregnancy test flashed positive a month before the election. For a month, I carried this perfect, barely-real secret with me as I sat in work meetings lobbying for reproductive medicine access, as I canvassed and phone-banked for the full slate of Democratic candidates, as I hoped for personal and national health and success, as I tried to suppress the fears that prevented me from fully celebrating, from hoping, from buying maternity clothing or Harris-Waltz merch. And then. Well, you know most of what happened next. Many of us mourned as a nation while others, unfettered by the president's fear-mongering, themselves spread a shocking amount of xenophobia, misogyny and racism. And on a personal level, I stayed at home rather than go on a work trip to Florida, which had just instituted a six-week abortion ban under Ron DeSantis' campaigns of intimidation and misinformation. At six weeks pregnant, I knew that the odds of early miscarriage were still high, and that access to care would mean a now-illegal abortion. Those weeks, I woke up, worked, and went to bed nauseous from pregnancy ― and from my terror for my immigrant family and friends, seeing the gleefully entitled hostility among the anti-abortion protestors at the clinic where I had volunteered for years, and now, increasingly aware of my precarious privilege as a pregnant person in New York, where, at the very least, access to and protections for abortion were protected. And I cried, curled up around the vague idea of this early pregnancy, wondering what I had done and what it would mean to bring a human into this country and world. At my 12-week appointment, when I had just been told I was having a girl and my phone was blowing up with a terrifying series of executive orders and nominations, I headed to my second OB-GYN appointment swamped by all of that fear, guilt, and the all-encompassing nausea of the wildly misnamed 'morning sickness.' Stripped to the waist and trying to pretend that I recognized and was moved by the flickering blob of static on the ultrasound screen, I expressed the easiest of my worries, that I wasn't providing my growing fetus with enough (or any) nutrients, as the only thing I was able to keep down was depressingly dry toast and the occasional cup of tea. As she wiped the goo from the ultrasound wand, my OB-GYN said five words that have since become a mantra and a sea change: 'Don't worry; she'll take what she needs.' She left the room as I lay on the table, absorbing the surprising power of that sentence. She'll take what she needs: a reassurance, but also a wish, that this baby girl, born into a terrifying nightmare of government-sanctioned misogyny, dehumanization of immigrants and minorities, cuts to social services, attacks on trans people, will somehow both recognize and demand her rights. Born to a parent who has always struggled with naming her needs, let alone taking what she needs, this being will nevertheless ensure that her own needs are met, even in her earliest moments in utero. And so she has; as the terror of this administration has grown, systematically and purposefully, in tandem alongside the joys and thrills of pregnancy, she has siphoned the iron from my blood to aid in her own development, shoved my internal organs into disarray to make space for her growing body, sent me to the pharmacy for Unisom, ginger tea, Tums, and a dizzying array of vitamins as she has jutted and carved her way into my digestive, endocrine, cardiac, other systems I never paid attention to until she claimed them for her own. And I have delighted in each of these uncomfortable, incredible reminders that my baby girl is, even now, asserting herself. 'She'll take what she needs' has echoed in my mind as a hope and a promise as my due date approaches — you'll take what you need, and I'll learn from you. I rub my belly, jabbed now with elbows and heels and other sharp little body parts demanding room and attention, and make my wish: You'll tell me what you need, and I will keep fighting to make it available for you. We'll take what we need, and we'll make sure that others can, too. Do you have a compelling personal story you'd like to see published on HuffPost? Find out what we're looking for here and send us a pitch at pitch@ These Are The States That Will Ignore Your Final Wishes Just Because You're Pregnant People See Me And Think I'm Pregnant. They're Shocked When I Tell Them The Heartbreaking Truth. When I Got Pregnant Again After 3 Miscarriages, My Husband Surprised Me With A Terrifying Gift
Daily Mail
07-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Myleene Klass admits she broke down in tears during 'feisty and fearless' daughter Ava's graduation ceremony as she recalls her 'lonely and fearful' journey as a single mother
Myleene Klass has revealed she broke down in tears during her daughter's graduation ceremony after viewing it as the culmination of a long and difficult journey through single parenthood. The presenter, 47, beamed with pride as talented pianist Ava, 17, graduated from the prestigious Royal Academy Of Music over the weekend. Myleene raises Ava and daughter Hero, 13, from her former marriage to Graham Quinn and son Apollo, five, with her fiancé Simon Motson. She was initially forced to raise her two eldest children alone after Quinn walked out on the presenter on her 35th birthday in 2013, just two years after their wedding. Recalling her early struggles in a lengthy Instagram tribute to Ava, Myleene admitted she felt 'lonely, fearful and as though the world was against her' as she adapted to life on her own. Accompanying her post with a handful of graduation photos, Myleene stunned in a black gown which featured cream fabric pleats - a dress she reused from her appearance at the Mission: Impossible - The Final Reckoning global film premiere in London in May. Meanwhile Ava, who attended the Royal Academy Of Music, cut a classic display in a red fitted floor-length gown which featured a meter long train. 'My daughter Ava has finally graduated high school,' she wrote. 'I haven't cried so much in ages. It's because I know our journey. 'And because of this, I wanted to acknowledge today in particular, the single Mamas (I know there are single dads but I can only speak from my own experience). 'Like you, there were days bringing up Ava (and Hero) where it felt the world was fighting against us and I was very much on my own. 'We have an amazing community around us but as a single mum when they were so young, the fear, the loneliness, the decision making, the mental load before everything else is considered, can really overwhelm. 'There were people who wanted to see me fail and to them as well as the majority who wanted to see us win, thank you for spurring me on.' She added: 'Today is recognition of what we have achieved, I had no intention of failing my children. Ava, I have single handedly grafted so that you might have the best I could give you and you have in turn risen up and grabbed everything with gusto, determination and resilience. 'You are fiesty, fearless and stronger than I could have ever imagined yet soft, loving and kind in equal measure. 'In the days I wondered where I would get the strength, it came from my girls. When they worry about me and how much I take on, I remind them, I'm forged from the fire. Single Mamas, I see you and so do our babies. Well done, keep on keeping on x 'And to my eldest daughter, my Ava bear, my day one, my forever love, thank you for choosing me to be your Mama. 'You are talented, smart, intuitive and an exceptional human being. My sun rises and sets with you. Go out and see the world on your terms babygirl. Just remember to come home every once in a while to tell Mama all about it. X 'Klass of 2025, Dismissed' Ava has previously showcased her incredible musical abilities as she appeared alongside her mother on Good Morning Britain to play the cello in 2023. Myleene explained she was 'so proud' of her daughter as they delivered a stunning piano performance of The Pogues' Fairytale Of New York on the breakfast show. Showing that she's inherited her mother's classical talents, Ava impressed with the moving cello performance, with Myleene admitting it made her feel 'emotional.' Ava said: 'I always wanted to be like her [Myleene] I'd dress like her and want to play like her. I am getting emotional; I am so proud.' The pair's performance was praised by viewers, with one posting: 'Is it only me that gets emotional watching parents performing with their kids awww. I think it's priceless (heart melting).' A second added: 'Absolutely beautiful and heartwarming.' The star previously shared that Ava sat her cello diploma at the age of 14, and earned herself a place at the prestigious Royal Academy of Music. Writing on Instagram, she said: 'Proud Mum alert. Today @pianos_our_forte took her Cello Diploma exam. (She'll kill me for saying this, but for context, muso's usually take their Grade 8's at 16 (she took 2 at 12) and Diplomas at 17/18, she's taking two at 14),' Myleene wrote alongside snaps of her and Ava outside the examination room. 'She is phenomenally dedicated, super talented and conscientious, but ultimately, this girl is kind.' 'I couldn't be more proud of her and cheering her on, driving her to her exams and sobbing as I sit in the waiting room hearing her play her heart out is nothing short of a privilege,' the proud mum gushed. Myleene then revealed that 'Ava's joining @royalacademyofmusic in a few weeks and we'll be there cheering her on every step of the way.' Myleene explained she was 'so proud' of her daughter as they delivered a stunning piano performance of The Pogues' Fairytale Of New York on the breakfast show The pair's performance was praised by viewers, with one posting: 'Is it only me that gets emotional watching parents performing with their kids awww' Myleene previously shared that Ava sat her cello diploma at the age of 14 , and earned herself a place at the prestigious Royal Academy of Music 'To the people who think Ava's amazing because I can play the piano, I can only help, I can't play it for her! This is her achievement. 'To the kids out there sacrificing their time in practice rooms, feeling the frustration, the worry of extra exams the blisters on their fingers and the mums ferrying them around, I see you.' 'You are part of the best tribe ever. You've taken the harder route but we're here for the Marathon, not the sprint. Muso's rock.' In March 2023, Myleene also shared her pride as Ava performed at her 'first official concert' with Martin Clunes. The proud mum captured parts of the talented teens rehearsals and the show for the Royal Academy of Music which included the Doc Martin actor, 61. Myleene said Ava 'absolutely smashed' her performance and 'forgets she is only 15' as the dedicated teenager took her Grade 8 piano exam when she was only 12-years-old. She penned: 'My babygirl @pianos_our_forte played her first official concert for the @royalacademyofmusic this weekend.' The presenter joked she got to play 'momager' for the weekend as she steamed her daughters dress for the occasion and took her to rehearsals. She continued: 'I got to play 'Momager' sticking music together, driving Ava to rehearsals and steaming her dress. 'She absolutely smashed it playing one of two monster pianos with #MiaWepener, #DorsetChamberOrchestra and #MartinClunes narrating. Musical Director of pianos, @duncanhoneybourne 'Watching her play, it's easy to forget she's still only 15. Most take grade 8 in their late teens. She took two at 12 and then a diploma.'
