I'm Virgin Island's sex therapist who gets frisky with clueless lads to teach them tricks in bed… we DON'T fake anything

The Sun

15-05-2025

AS a trainee sex and relationships counsellor, even so much as giving a client hug would be deemed inappropriate and breaching ethical boundaries.
So watching Dr Danielle Harel groan with pleasure as she passionately kissed the neck of a timid young virgin, I was shocked.
12
12
It goes against everything you're taught in traditional therapy - but Dr Harel's methods are anything but conventional.
She and fellow sexologist Celeste Hirschman are 'hands on' sex therapists and co-founders of The Somatica Method, which combines talking therapy with practical session s to help inexperienced clients get in touch with their erotic side and overcome anxiety and sexual dysfunction.
The duo, who showcase their eyebrow-raising methods on the racy new Channel 4 show Virgin Island, also work with sexual surrogates - a therapist the virgins can go all the way with.
Both Danielle, a married mum-of-two, and Celeste insist that they experience 'authentic arousal' with their clients during sessions.
In an exclusive chat with The Sun, Celeste explains: 'That's one of the things about being able to do this work - I think not everybody can.
'Sometimes, for us, you're really in the moment, and you're feeling the sensations and the connection.
'And if somebody has bad breath, that's part of the coaching. We would need to say, 'Hey, there's a hygiene issue here. You need to make sure that you brush your teeth really well and floss them and use mouthwash.' That's just part of the process.
'But there was authentic arousal and energy for sure throughout the sessions that we did with the different contributors [on Virgin Island].'
To get in the mood for the hands-on sessions, the sexologists look for what they find attractive about their client.
'We try to engage with those parts - because there's no point in faking it,' Danielle says.
Watch the shocking moment Virgin Island stars practise 'self-pleasure touching' with sex experts in awkward scenes
12
12
12
'Because if we think about really learning confidence, you need to feel it from the other person, because you're learning it through the nervous system.'
Virgin Island follows 12 adult virgins as they bravely attempt to tackle the issues holding them back in the bedroom, under the guidance of Danielle, Celeste and their team.
Part of the therapy is working with the 'sexual surrogates', who lie naked in front of the group, inviting clients to explore their body.
Danielle tells me: ' Surrogates are really trained, skilled practitioners that are there to work with a virgin to teach them skills around, like, how to do oral sex, kissing, all kinds of skills… that might include intercourse as well.'
'My husband loves it'
Danielle, who has a PHD in human sexuality and degrees in psychology and clinical social work, insists her husband - who works on tech at the Somata Institute - supports her work.
'Oh, my husband loves my job,' she says, adding: 'He's very big on empowerment and feeling, you know. He's a big feminist.'
While Celeste, who is single, loves 'dating and connecting' - and she isn't shy about using her expertise in her own relationships.
She says: 'I think it can be a little bit intimidating - and certainly that's been expressed to me - but there's also a lot of interest and curiosity and excitement, and many people express a desire to learn more.'
The Somatica Method attracts clients from all over the world, and also provides coaching to train therapists in the technique.
Their clients are as likely to find themselves in a steamy embrace with their therapist as a deep conversation.
Practical tips include how to smoothly manoeuvre a partner into different sex positions to build confidence, so that clients know what to do once they actually get into the bedroom.
'Some of it is touch, and some of it is working with emotions and sharing feelings,' Danielle explains.
'With a virgin, we would start with boundaries and consent to make sure that they really feel empowered, and they know what they want and what they don't want and how to communicate about that.
'And then we start practising with different kinds of touch skills, flirting skills - sharing erotic energy.'
The Method has helped thousands of virgins worldwide, aged 21 to 72, as well as sexually experienced individuals and couples who've lost their sexual spark.
And it clearly work for the virgins on the show, as delivery driver Zac, who had the aforementioned steamy clinch with Danielle, enthuses: 'No one's ever said I'm sexy, No one. I'm feeling fuzzy all over."
'People feel so closeted when it comes to sex - they feel so scared,' Celeste says.
'So then starting to see how they react and start to develop confidence and relaxation is really confidence-building.'
'Upping the ante'
The sexperts' therapeutic methods are only set to get racier as the series goes on, Celeste teases: 'I don't know how many spoilers we can give, but I will say it continues to escalate and escalate and escalate.'
Danielle adds: 'We build foundations, and we build on those foundations, and we keep kind of upping the ante.'
It comes as more than a third (36 per cent) of 16 to 24-year-olds and almost one in five (19 per cent) of 16–to 30-year-olds are virgins.
12
Danielle and Celeste reckon the pressure from social media to be perfect and high-expectations set in porn are among the reasons so many adults haven't had sex.
Celeste says: 'I think all of those things play a big part, plus the pandemic and the isolation - everybody sitting on their screens - add up to just make people way less able and inspired to go out and connect with each other in real life.'
Some critics have accused those involved in the show of 'exploiting' participants with the use of physical touch during therapy.
But Danielle and Celeste are keen to stress that a 'huge duty of care' went into ensuring the participants were fully supported throughout.
During 'surrogacy' partner sessions, therapists are also present to immediately deal with any issues that arise for participants.
Surrogates are really trained, skilled practitioners that are there to work with a virgin to teach them skills around, like, how to do oral sex, kissing, all kinds of skills… that might include intercourse as well
Dr Danielle Harel
The pair say they also receive referrals from 'conventional therapists' who are unable to help their clients with intimacy issues.
'If somebody's never done touch before, a traditional therapist can't help them at all learn how to touch more sensually,' Celeste adds.
'And there are people who really, really need that in order to go out into the world and be more successful in their erotic lives.'
As well as exploring with the coaches, the virgins on the show are also welcome to get it on with one another.
Celeste hints at some possible pairings, teasing: 'We get to see some fun, flirtatious moments and connections.'
With the show dividing public opinion, Danielle and Celeste seem unfazed by potential backlash.
Celeste says: 'There's always critics out there, but we've just seen our work help so many people in their whole personal lives and their sex lives get completely transformed.
'The ripple effect is so profound. Wait until you see the whole series, and you'll see the transformations that happen for these young folks, and it's just so heartwarming.'
My view? It's unorthodox, controversial, and goes against every convention of traditional therapy training. But that's not to say there isn't a place for it.
And if their results are anything to go by – clients finding pleasure, confidence, and maybe even long-term love – then perhaps they're onto something.
At the very least, I'll never look at a clinical role-play exercise the same way again.
WHAT TO EXPECT FROM VIRGIN ISLAND
The Channel 4 show sees a group of men and women brought together for their erotic awakening.
Producers hope the virginal participants will pop each other's cherries.
However, if that fails, then they will turn to help from specialists known as 'sex surrogates'.
A TV insider said: 'There's never been a TV show that pushes the boundaries quite like this — and probably never will be again.
'The aim is to hopefully have all the virgins find each other attractive, but if that fails then this is the plan B.
'These people are professionals who are constantly on hand for anything that may be required.'
Sex surrogates are professionals in the field of intimacy and are often deployed on the advice of medical professionals.
Sessions can begin with discussions about intimacy.
They then move on to touching which can lead to other sexual practices, with any psychological or physical issues gradually overcome.
12
12
12
12
Virgin Island is available to watch and stream on Channel 4 now.