How to cultivate genuine self-awareness and propel your leadership

Fast Company

3 days ago

Self-awareness is often referred to as the foundation of emotional intelligence, and it's a requirement for exceptional leadership. When leaders understand their emotions, recognize their strengths and weaknesses, and hone their decision-making and communication skills, they build trust and foster better collaboration within their teams.
This leads to better performance all around. But here's the catch: Developing self-awareness isn't a onetime achievement. It's a continuous, evolving process that requires intention and reflection.
Leaders who actively cultivate this skill don't just improve their own effectiveness, they also create a healthier, more productive organizational culture. In fact, research from the Corporate Executive Board (now part of Gartner), reveals that leaders with high self-awareness are 10% more effective in their roles than those who rank lower. It's a simple truth: Self-awareness isn't just a personal asset—it's essential for any leader looking to drive success.
Defining Self-Awareness
Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors—and to see how they influence your decisions, relationships, and leadership style. It involves identifying what drives you, understanding your strengths and weaknesses, and being honest with yourself about areas for improvement.
Self-aware leaders do more than just understand themselves. They also recognize how their actions are perceived by others, which is essential for cultivating trust within a team. It's a skill that evolves over time, meaning leaders must regularly pause and reflect on their actions and their impact.
The Role of Feedback in Self-Awareness
Feedback is one of the most powerful tools for cultivating self-awareness. However, many leaders shy away from it due to fear, pride, discomfort, or uncertainty about its reliability. Avoiding feedback, though, can significantly hinder both personal and professional growth.
Often the best feedback comes from those who report to you. For instance, one experience that was a turning point for me was when one of my direct reports pointed out one of my unconscious biases. Eight years ago, I was preparing to head home after a long day at work when I heard a knock on my office door. It was Katherine, one of my team members. She asked if she could give me some feedback about that morning's team meeting.
Katherine shared something that left me stunned: 'Are you aware that you tend to listen more to the people who are the most vocal, and that they tend to be men?' I had always thought I was an inclusive leader, so I was shocked to hear this. I responded honestly, 'I had no idea.'
Katherine explained that this was something she had wanted to bring up for a while but didn't feel comfortable doing so until now. I immediately apologized, thanked her for sharing this with me, and asked for specific examples. She provided them, and I made sure to listen attentively.
This interaction caused me to change how I lead. I decided to ask myself before every meeting what biases I need to check myself on. I also talked with the people on my team who were less vocal and asked if it would be okay for me to call on them during meetings to help them share more of their ideas. Katherine's feedback offered valuable insights into how my behavior affects others, uncovering a blind spot that might have otherwise remained hidden.
So make sure you solicit feedback regularly—whether it's from a childhood friend, trusted colleague, mentor, or direct report. Once you've identified someone you trust, clarify the type of feedback you're seeking. For example, you could ask for input on your biases, or a recent project, an interaction with a colleague, or how others perceive your leadership style.
Mindfulness as a Self-Awareness Tool
Mindfulness is a powerful tool for developing self-awareness. It involves staying fully present in the moment, which helps leaders become more attuned to their emotions, thoughts, and reactions. Simple mindfulness exercises, such as focused breathing or short reflection breaks during the day, can greatly improve emotional awareness.
In my work with clients and the workshops I facilitate, I guide participants through breathing exercises. Many share that integrating mindfulness into their daily routines has helped them be more fully present. For example, some clients now begin their team meetings with breathing exercises to help themselves and their teams stay focused and engaged during discussions. These practices support clearer decision-making and improved emotional regulation. I also use these exercises myself to ensure I'm fully present before coaching a client or facilitating a workshop. They help me stay grounded and attentive.
In addition to breathing exercises, I recommend a few other strategies to help leaders remain present. One is to put cellphones away during meetings. This reduces the temptation to check your phone, which can signal to others that you aren't fully engaged or listening. I also suggest creating a 10-minute buffer between meetings. This allows leaders time to reflect on the meeting they just attended and prepare for the next one. Without this space, leaders often rush from one meeting to the next, missing the opportunity to reflect and be fully present.
Leveraging Self-Assessments
Self-assessments can also play a crucial role in developing self-awareness. One tool I frequently use with my coaching clients and the teams I work with is the CliftonStrengths finder from Gallup. This assessment, grounded in positive psychology, has been around for more than 20 years. It was developed based on research that asked, 'What would happen if we studied what was right with people, rather than focusing on what's wrong?' The result is an assessment that identifies a leader's strengths, allowing them to build on what they do well, rather than focusing on fixing weaknesses.
It also highlights how each strength, when pushed to an extreme, can hinder success. For instance, a leader with the strength of being an 'achiever' works hard and possesses a great deal of stamina. They take immense satisfaction in being busy and productive. However, when taken too far, this strength can lead to burnout or cause frustration among those being led, potentially resulting in high turnover if team members feel overwhelmed.
Developing a Growth Mindset
Self-awareness is closely linked to a growth mindset, or a belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed over time through effort and learning. Leaders who embody this mindset inspire their teams to continually improve, fostering a culture of resilience and adaptability. This mindset not only benefits leaders but also empowers teams to take risks, learn from mistakes, and grow.
The key to fostering a growth mindset is to view feedback as an opportunity for self-improvement, as I mentioned earlier. When receiving feedback, ask questions such as: 'How can I improve?' or 'What specific actions can I take to do better?' This approach transforms feedback into a valuable tool for personal and professional growth—and makes it more likely that people will approach you with this feedback in the first place.
Developing your leadership
Self-awareness is not a destination, but an ongoing journey that requires dedication and intentionality. For leaders, cultivating self-awareness is crucial to becoming more effective, empathetic, and emotionally intelligent. By consistently reflecting on your behavior, seeking feedback, practicing mindfulness, and leveraging self-assessments, you will improve your leadership skills and create a positive environment for your team.