55 Thoughts I Had While Watching ‘The Gilded Age' Season 3 Premiere
All right, I confess; I didn't keep up religiously with Season 2 of The Gilded Age—maybe because I was getting my Cynthia Nixon fix from And Just Like That… and my Carrie Coon fix from The White Lotus (and my Christine Baranski fix from obsessively rewatching Mamma Mia!, but I digress). Now, though, the HBO show is back for its third season, and I am absolutely locked in, even if I'm having a little trouble remembering some of the characters' names and/or general deals. Let's dive in, shall we?
Horse-drawn carriages! Mr. Russell's beard is so on-point. Ah, the picturesque majesty of snow in New York, before it turns to slush and gets completely disgusting. Would be nice right about now! 'We've had some changes.' I'll say! Time for Cynthia Nixon's temperance meeting! Yes, Christine Baranski! Call it 'absurd'! Get her ass! Christine and Cynthia are really showcasing the range of bangs types here (straight vs. curly). Oh, hell yeah, 'Mr. Sargent' is coming by to paint! This is like when they casually reference Picasso in Titanic. Taissa Farmiga's little fur capelet is fabulous. No offense, The Gilded Age props/set design team, but this snow looks fake as hell. There's our girl Louisa Jacobson! In powder blue, no less! New York used to be so pretty before we, as a culture, ruined it. Miners' strike? There is power in a union, baby! 'I prefer to pick them off one by one.' Likely thing for a union-busting boss to say! It's weird that some people on this show are doing Little Period Voices and some aren't. Obsessed with Mr. Sargent's naughty little smock. Portrait of Madame X shoutout! One of the all-time art-historical babes! Yay, Denée Benton's novel is getting published! I need a supercut of just Cynthia and Christine fighting. 'Those who partake in alcohol are destined to the fury of hell.' Welp! God, Louisa's looking blonde as hell. OMG, this corset top over a turtleneck? Go off, Gladys. Ugh, Aurora, I hate your husband. You should, too! She's exactly right in not granting him a divorce, IMO. Was the word 'shady' being used in this context back then? 'I never thought I would be glad to have no children.' It happens! 'If you want to marry me and I want to marry you, we're already engaged.' Well, not exactly, bro. Where's the ring? Hot lemon and honey sounds so good right now. Cynthia dropping the hammer on her lodger! I love it. LMAO at Christine saying that the 'Female Normal and High School' sounds like a mistranslation. Aw, I love this brother-sister chat moment. Kind of weird that it's in Gladys's bed, but I guess they didn't have that many places to hang out? In…their mansion? I'm obsessed with the various and sundry robes of The Gilded Age. See, Denée and Louisa hanging out in a bedroom I can totally get behind. (Not in a gay way! Just in a gal-pals-at-a-sleepover way!) Oh no, someone's snitching on Gladys! 'In this house, nothing is accepted that isn't proposed by Mrs. Russell.' Tea. These boots Adelheid is lacing are sort of…gorgeous? Man, talk about laying down the law. 'In America, you don't have to live like your parents lived.' In theory, sure. Never has a man looked so sad in a bowler hat. Oh no, Denée definitely isn't feeling better! Was consumption still a thing during this time period? Man, I really should have studied for, like, any of my history classes throughout my 16 years of education. Jesus, the doctor's too racist to treat Denée? Even with all of these women's money? 'What I feel for Billy is real.' Sure. 'I'm not a girl! Not anymore! When will you see that?' What an ideal time for a Britney needle drop. Damn, Carrie calling Billy a 'worthless nonentity' goes crazy hard. I need to interview the horse actors on this show. And with that…it's a wrap on Episode 1 of Season 3! Welcome back, my little women!
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