Woman's Fiancé Calls Her 'Lazy' for Wanting to Hire a Full-Time Maid. He Thinks She Should 'Do More Around the House'

Yahoo

15-07-2025

A woman on Reddit admits she's burned out from balancing work, cooking and housework in a two-dog household
Her fiancé objects to hiring a full-time maid, calling her 'lazy' despite their ability to afford it
She questions whether it's fair to split finances 50/50 while still being expected to handle most of the choresA woman turns to the Reddit community for advice following a heated disagreement with her fiancé over hiring a full-time maid.
She shares that both she and her partner have good jobs and split their finances evenly, but she actually earns a bit more than he does.
They live together with two large dogs, a golden retriever and a border collie, which means their house gets messy quickly. 'When we first moved in, I took on most of the cleaning and cooking,' she writes in her post, explaining how she enjoyed cooking for her fiancé at first, and sometimes they would order takeout when she was too tired.
But the demands of juggling work, house chores and cooking eventually became overwhelming for her. 'After months of juggling work, house chores, and cooking — sometimes even having to cook while in the middle of meetings — I burned out. Completely,' she confides.
The couple agreed to hire a part-time maid, which she says isn't expensive where they live, and it helped lighten her load. However, the maid doesn't come every day, so she still finds herself making breakfast for both of them and serving it before he wakes up.
Recently, she suggested hiring someone to clean every weekday to keep the house in shape and relieve some of her stress. Her fiancé's reaction was less than supportive. 'He got really upset and said it wasn't necessary, that I'm being lazy, and that I'm trying to avoid any responsibility for housework,' she reveals.
She points out that she has shouldered more than her fair share of the chores for a long time. 'When I used to cook, he would wash the dishes but let's be real, cooking a full meal is a lot more work than just washing dishes,' she says.
Despite her efforts to explain her feelings and the benefits of more frequent help, her fiancé remains unconvinced. 'He still thinks it's not justified to have daily help and that I should do more around the house,' she shares, expressing her frustration.
She also highlights the fairness issue, noting, 'I told him I find it unfair that we split finances 50/50, I work full-time, and he still expects me to be the one taking charge of the house chores.' She feels like he's not willing to make things easier for her, even though they can afford it.
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The woman stands her ground, asking the Reddit community, 'AITA for wanting to hire a maid Monday through Friday and standing my ground?' She explains that her fiancé argues, 'being able to afford it doesn't mean we should do it,' and that he's annoyed she's been doing less and less in the house and giving more responsibility to the maid.
But for her, the extra help has been a game changer. 'Honestly it's been heaven waking up to food on my plate and not having to worry about crossing my meetings with cooking time,' she admits, while her fiancé insists she's just 'avoiding basic adult everyday stuff.'
Now, she's left questioning whether she's in the wrong for wanting to make life a little easier, or if her fiancé's expectations are out of line.
Read the original article on People