
Do you fall in love hard and fast? Three signs you're an emophiliac – & five ways to break the destructive lust cycle
Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
FROM falling hard and fast to ignoring red flags, why emophilia could be your toxic dating trait.
Have you ever been on a first date and felt like you've met your soulmate?
Sign up for Scottish Sun
newsletter
Sign up
1
From falling hard and fast to ignoring red flags, why emophilia could be your toxic dating trait
Credit: getty
If this happens often, you may have emophilia, AKA a tendency to fall in love quickly and with just about anyone.
And experts warn it can have a negative impact on mental health, leaving people vulnerable and trapped in toxic relationships, or see them darting from one relationship to the next, constantly chasing the thrill of early attraction or that feeling of falling in love.
'When you first fall for someone, you get that rush of the feel-good hormone, serotonin,' says Sarah Louise Ryan, dating and relationship expert, matchmaker and psychotherapist.
'This phase of romantic love is really the rose-tinted glasses phase. You are falling for the newness of these just-discovered feelings, just as much as you're falling for the actual person. This is because new and different people bring out different parts of us.'
There's nothing wrong with these emotions, though they do simmer down as we build a relationship.
'In reality, when that spark fades, that is when the real relationship begins,' says Sarah.
'But those with emophilia don't ever want that feeling to fizzle out, which can lead them into a volatile position romantically. They either never fully commit and move on to the next partner, or they date multiple people to discover who they have the biggest spark with, all in search of the rush.'
The emotional fallout from this pattern can be huge.
The good news is it's possible to stop and change your thinking and actions.
I'm a dating expert - the 5 key signs your partner is cheating on you & the Instagram feature that'll tell you all you need to know
Love At First Sight?
But whatever happened to 'love at first sight', you might wonder?
Genuine love at first sight is an instant attraction to someone you might share common values with, find intriguing and are physically attracted to.
It can be with someone who feels safe and calm.
But emophilia is falling in love with the feeling of lust, attention, validation and connection, rather than the person.
'That need for attachment can be intoxicating, but it's important to get to know the person you've fallen for on a deeper level,' Sarah says.
'You will feel anxiety when you're not getting that serotonin burst, but if you follow these steps before becoming emotionally attached so quickly, you'll feel better.'
When Emophilia Becomes a Problem
At a time when the dating world feels dire and 'true love' is hard to find, is it really all that bad if someone is so open to connection?
The issue is that when emophiliacs fall, they tend not to question the relationship's long-term goals, values or red flags.
This can make them either more likely to jump ship or get stuck in a relationship that was doomed from the start.
'Falling for risky partners may seem appealing, but it can be dangerous when their aim is manipulation and destruction,' explains Sarah.
'People with emophilia can be attracted to narcissists, who may lovebomb a new partner by showing excessive amounts of affection and attention. This would be ideal for a person with emophilia. Because they think they're in love, emophiliacs are likely to overlook warnings or advice, even from trusted family and friends. However, when red flags aren't addressed, over time they can become more problematic.'
Why Do you Fall so Hard?
Though the exact cause of emophilia is unknown, there are several possible theories.
'It is thought that low serotonin levels in the brain may contribute,' says Sarah.
Serotonin is also implicated in conditions including depression and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).
'Some people may also be hypersensitive to oxytocin,' adds Sarah.
Also known as the love hormone, oxytocin creates feelings of trust and a desire to care.
Falling in love quickly is also a shared experience of people with ADHD, which may be linked with the disorder's symptoms of impulsivity.
But it may just be a personality trait.
For some, there is excitement to be found in the chaos, and boredom in the monotony.
FIVE WAYS TO BREAK UP WITH EMOPHILIA
Overcoming the need to chase the rush of falling for someone isn't easy, as many of our relationship desires are ingrained.
'I would ask an emophiliac: 'Is it working for you?'", Sarah says.
'If the answer is yes, and you're happy flitting from one relationship to another, keep doing what you are doing. If the answer is no, I'd recommend these tips.'
1. Go Cold Turkey
If you are a serial dater, go cold turkey – including no sex or romantic relations – to focus on yourself.
Discover the qualities you like in yourself and note the ways in which you are capable without having a significant other.
Then, pick up conscious dating when the time is right.
'When you find the confidence to make the right choices, you will no longer let your drive for a feeling choose for you,' says Sarah.
'It will be hard work, but worth it.'
2. Spot The Red Flags
Some red flags are universal.
For example, a lack of respect or signs of attempting to control another person.
However, others will be more specific to you.
For example, how do you feel about their financial situation, living arrangements, family set-up or beliefs?
It's easy for a friend to say: 'That's a red flag', but ask yourself if it really is for you.
Write down your deal-breakers, then ensure when connecting with someone that you ask the questions that will unveil these warning signs.
3. Note What Hasn't Worked
Sit back and really think about the patterns you have fallen into with each romantic partner.
What happened? Where did it go wrong? Self-awareness is important in the decision-making process.
If necessary, write out an action plan for the next time someone catches your attention.
4. Listen To Friends
You may get so caught up in the rush of a new partner that you forget the concerns of those closest to you.
Take time to speak to a family member or friend who knows you well and has historically given you honest advice.
Run through any worries or ask for feedback on new partners.
Your friends don't have to love or even like your partner, but if they have concerns about them, it's worth hearing them.
This can be a failing for people with emophilia, who can only see the positives of a new crush.
5. Consult A Therapist
Therapists or counsellors can help you to understand and manage emophilia.
'Therapists help bring you into the here and now and find internal validation, rather than seeking external validation from others,' says Sarah.
'That means that those with emophilia can consciously connect with themselves and with others when dating.'

Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles


BBC News
an hour ago
- BBC News
Babydoll Archi: Indian woman's identity stolen for erotic AI content in deepfake deception
It took just a few days for Indian Instagram sensation Babydoll Archi to double her following to 1.4 million, thanks to a couple of viral social media was a video that showed her in a red sari, dancing seductively to Dame Un Grr – a Romanian song. And a photo posted on the platform showed her posing with American adult film star Kendra everyone wanted to know about her - and the name Babydoll Archi trended in Google search and spawned countless memes and fan pages. But there was one issue about to emerge – there was no real woman behind the online Instagram account was fake, although the face it used had uncanny likeness to a real woman - a homemaker in Dibrugarh city in Assam, whom we'll call truth unravelled after her brother lodged a police complaint. Pratim Bora, Sanchi's ex-boyfriend, was police officer Sizal Agarwal who's heading the investigation told the BBC that Sanchi and Bora had a falling out and the AI likeness he created was to exact "pure revenge" on - a mechanical engineer and a self-taught artificial intelligence (AI) enthusiast - used private photos of Sanchi to create a fake profile, Ms Agarwal is in custody and has not made any statements yet. The BBC has reached out to his family and will update the article when they Archi was created in 2020 and the first uploads were made in May 2021. The initial photos were her real pictures that had been morphed, Ms Agarwal said."As time passed, Bora used tools such as ChatGPT and Dzine to create an AI version. He then populated the handle with deepfake photos and videos."The account started picking up likes from last year but it started gaining traction from April this year, she short two-paragraph complaint to the police submitted by Sanchi's family on the night of 11 July came with printouts of some photos and videos as Agarwal says it did not name anyone because they had no idea who could be behind it. Babydoll Archi was not an unfamiliar name for the police. Ms Agarwal says they had also seen media reports and comments speculating that she was AI generated, but there had been no suggestion that it was based on a real they received the complaint, police wrote to Instagram asking for the details of the account's creator."Once we received information from Instagram, we asked Sanchi if she knew any Pratim Bora. Once she confirmed, we traced his address in the neighbouring district of Tinsukia. We arrested him on the evening of 12 July."Ms Agarwal says the police have "seized his laptop, mobile phones and hard drives and his bank documents since he had monetised the account"."The account had 3,000 subscriptions on linktree and we believe he had earned 1m rupees from it. We believe he made 300,000 rupees in just five days before his arrest," she added. Ms Agarwal says Sanchi is "extremely distraught - but now she and her family are receiving counselling and they are doing better".There really is no way to prevent something like this from happening, "but had we acted earlier, we could have prevented it from gaining so much traction", Ms Agarwal said."But Sanchi had no idea because she has no social media presence. Her family too had been blocked out from this account. They became aware only once it went viral," she has not responded to the BBC queries on the case, but it generally does not allow posting of nudity or sexual content. And last month, CBS reported that it removed a number of ads promoting AI tools used to create sexually explicit deepfakes using images of real people. The Instagram account of Babydoll Archi, which had 282 posts, is no longer available to public - although social media is replete with her photos and videos and one Instagram account seems to have all of them. The BBC has asked Meta what they are planning to do about Bal, AI expert and lawyer, says what happened to Sanchi "is horrible but almost impossible to prevent".She can go to the court and seek the right to be forgotten, and a court can order the press reports that named her to be taken down but it's hard to scrub all the trace from the happened to Sanchi, she says, is what's always been happening to women, where their photos and videos are circulated as revenge."It's now a lot easier to do because of AI, but such incidents are still not as common as we expect - or they could be under-reported because of stigma or people being targeted may not even know about it as in the present case," Ms Bal says. And people watching it had no incentive to report it to the social media platform or cybercrime portal, she their complaint against Mr Bora, police have invoked sections of law that deal with sexual harassment, distribution of obscene material, defamation, forgery to harm reputation, cheating by personification and cybercrime. If found guilty, Mr Bora could get up to 10 years in case which has also led to outrage on social media in recent days has seen some seeking tougher laws to deal with such Bal believes there are enough laws to take care of such cases, but whether there's scope for new laws to deal with generative AI companies has to be looked at."But we also have to remember that deepfakes are not necessarily bad and laws have to be carefully crafted because they can be weaponised to chill free speech."Follow BBC News India on Instagram, YouTube, X and Facebook


Glasgow Times
2 hours ago
- Glasgow Times
Ozzy Osbourne's final Black Sabbath show just weeks ago
The legendary rocker passed away at the age of 76 'surrounded by love' it was announced by his family earlier tonight (July 22). He had been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease in 2019. Appearing on a large black throne in Villa Park, Birmingham, he told thousands of heavy metal enthusiasts on July 5 that it was 'so good to be on this stage'. I have been a Black Sabbath fan almost my entire life. And when I say Black Sabbath I mean the band with Ozzy Osbourne in it. Everything else was business. They were just immense. A thundering voice and noise direct from the working class. — Danny Baker (@prodnose) July 22, 2025 Osbourne and his fellow original Black Sabbath members – Iommi, Butler and Ward – were the last to appear on stage as part of a star-studded line-up for the Back to the Beginning concert. Among the bands performing were Anthrax, Metallica and Guns N'Roses, and there were messages of thanks from other celebrities, including Jack Black, Ricky Gervais and Dolly Parton. In an emotional moment, Osbourne said: 'I don't know what to say, man, I've been laid up for like six years. You have no idea how I feel – thank you from the bottom of my heart.' Ozzy Osbourne's last social media post A post shared on Instagram just one day ago showed an empty corridor at Villa Park and a flier that remains following the show. Fans were quick to comment with their sadness this evening (July 22) following Ozzy's passing. What was Ozzy Osbourne's biggest hit? Ozzy's biggest hit is considered to be 'Crazy Train'. While it didn't top the Billboard Hot 100, it's noted as 'a classic of the heavy metal genre', released in 1980. Other notable hits and fan favourites include Mama, I'm Coming Home, No More Tears and a duet with his daughter Kelly Osbourne, on 'Changes' which topped the UK charts in 2003.


South Wales Guardian
3 hours ago
- South Wales Guardian
Ryan Reynolds pays tribute after death of Joey Jones
Llandudno-born left-back Jones made 479 appearances for the Red Dragons across three spells with the club. Hollywood A-lister Reynolds posted a picture on Instagram of himself and fellow co-owner Rob McElhenney alongside Jones. A post shared by Ryan Reynolds (@vancityreynolds) 'I'm really glad I got to spend time with you,' wrote Reynolds, who completed his takeover of the club with McElhenney in 2021. 'Thanks for the stories. Condolences to his family, friends and Mickey (Thomas, Jones' close friend and former Wrexham team-mate). Rest up, Joey. Big second half coming up.' Jones, who was capped 72 times by Wales, began his career with Wrexham in 1973 before moving to Liverpool, where he won two European Cups and a league title, two years later. He returned to play at the Racecourse Ground between 1978 and 1982 and then ended his career with the club – from 1987 to 1992 – following stints with Chelsea and Huddersfield.