Think you're cool? Here are the six boxes you'll have to tick

The Guardian

4 hours ago

Name: Cool.
Age: The Fonz was the embodiment of cool, and Happy Days started in 1974. But the concept of cool began earlier, among rebellious subcultures, including jazz musicians in the 1940s and beatniks in the 1950s.
Thanks, Grandpa. Anyone a bit more recent I might have heard of? Charli xcx is definitely cool, and her Glastonbury set at the weekend proved it.
What about Sir Rod Stewart, also at Glasto. Is he cool? Hmmm, less so. He supports Reform for starters, and Reform definitely isn't cool.
Surely it's subjective? Not entirely.
Next you are going to tell me there's a study. Yes, a study has just been published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General.
Catchy title. Anyway, go on. It surveyed nearly 6,000 people about their understanding of what cool is …
But that surely depends on where these people are. Maybe in Papua New Guinea, Rod Stewart is the epitome of cool. Papua New Guinea wasn't part of the study, but data was collected from countries including the US, Chile, China, Germany, India, Nigeria and Turkey, and participants' ideas about what 'cool' is were similar, regardless of where they were.
No Cool Britannia? No. But participants did have to recognise the word 'cool' in English …
Doesn't that mean they were already influenced by ideas of what cool is from rich English-speaking countries? Stop trying to discredit the study – that's very uncool of you.
What about differences in age, gender, education and wealth? Again, not so important. Coolness means pretty much the same to everyone.
And what does it mean to pretty much everyone? The researchers from three US universities identified six 'cool' traits.
Which are? Cool people tend to be extroverted, hedonistic, powerful, adventurous, open and autonomous.
I'm definitely seeing Charli xcx. But maybe also a tiny bit of Sir Rodney, no? 'I am sailing, I am sailing / Home again, 'cross the sea'. Need I say more?
Stop! You're right. And that was before any mention of Reform. Plus, he likes model trains.
Not cool? Extroverted, hedonistic, adventurous … hmmm, don't think so.
Who cares about being cool anyway? Funny you ask: research suggests it's most important for adolescents to be seen to be cool. But that doesn't mean it's impossible to be cool when you get on a bit.
Go on, then: name one cool person over 60. Easy, without even leaving Glastonbury. Extroverted, tick. Hedonistic, tick. And the rest, tick tick tick tick. I give you … Jarvis Cocker.
Do say: 'Ayyyyyy' (in the style of Fonzie).
Don't say: 'Nigel Farage's red trousers – they're cool, yeah?'