Gen Z Is Coming for Your Punctuation
Is nothing sacred anymore? Now we can't even text — text, the thing millennials practically invented on T9 keyboards — without being called out by Gen Z. The generation who banned skinny jeans and used to eat Tide pods are calling out people for breaking their texting 'rules,' which include not capitalizing letters, hidden meanings in emojis, and, yes, foregoing punctuation.
One Gen X mom on Upworthy said her teenagers called her out for being 'aggressive' by using a period in a text message, which she vehemently defended.
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Another punctuation problem Gen Zers have? Ellipses at the end of texts, which aren't meant to signal anything deeper. 'What, exactly, is going on with boomers and ellipses?' one Redditor asked, per New York Post, saying that they felt this 'comes off as passive aggressive at worst, insane at best.'
As a millennial, I can see both sides. I often use periods in my texts without thinking, but I would only say 'Hey…' if I did have something serious to say afterward. I get that other generations have a different style of texting, but it does get confusing when people read into texts they shouldn't (or don't realize you're being passive-aggressive when you are!).
For Gen Z, though, this lack of care for punctuation goes beyond casual text messages. One millennial wrote about how frustrated she feels when reading school essays and seeing teens leave out periods and skip capitalizing letters for Reader's Digest.
Jason Dorsey, a business etiquette expert, the president of the Center for Generational Kinetics and the author of Zconomy: How Gen Z Will Change the Future of Business, told the outlet, 'There's definitely a trend where Gen Z eschews traditional grammar in written communications. We see this particularly in how they have dropped using capital letters and punctuation.'
This is normal, he explained, adding, 'Language is fluid, and conventions change all the time as societal norms evolve.'
It's all fine and good … if you can keep up. My Gen Z sister asked me if I was being aggressive when I said 'lol' at the end of a sentence, which is a habit from even before texting. She said 'lol' and the happy face emoji are both passive aggressive; whereas she will use the skull emoji or say 'im dead' instead to signify that she 'finds something so funny she literally died' (not literally). It's mind-boggling to say the least, which is why half the time I just call her so she can be super clear on my intentions.
We need more advice to wrap our minds around the teen texting etiquette, so we reached out to our SheKnows Teen Council for more tips on the hidden meaning of texting, and if punctuation is actually out or not. Hopefully their answers will clear some things up for all of us!
Esmé, 19, says she doesn't 'think twice about it' when her parents use a period, as 'they would use a period without understanding current connotation.' (Esmé's parents: same!) But she does take it as 'passive aggressive' if someone younger than 30 uses it.
It seems like wondering if someone is mad at them was a common theme among the teens we talked to. 'My mom always texts me using periods and it makes me think that she's pissed off at me,' Ajani, 20, says. 'I've told her about how it comes across as a little passive aggressive but she's yet to stop. It throws me off because she also uses periods when she is actually mad at me so she's constantly sending me mixed signals.'
Corbin, 13, shares, 'If somebody texts with a period, then they're probably mad. Like if they just said, 'hey' or something without a period I would think it was casual, but with a period they just seem a little bit mad.' (Although, he doesn't feel this way about a text from his parents 'because I know they're old,' he adds.)
'When someone ends a text with a period, I usually immediately assume that they are trying to be ironic/dramatic, or they are mad at me,' Sophie, 19, says, adding that she doesn't feel the same with her parents because 'they like to text with punctuation.'
'Ultimately, it mostly just depends on the person you're texting,' Sophie continues. 'For example, if someone who usually doesn't use punctuation sends me a message with a period at the end, it signals to me that something is different.'
Exclamation points and question marks are OK within reason, according to Esmé, although she reiterated that she 'never uses periods.' She explains, 'I feel like question marks are just a grammar thing that feels normal but exclamation points are like a version of an emoji just to show that I'm super excited.'
Corbin says that while he uses 'question marks a lot' with his friends, he hasn't 'see a period or an exclamation mark in a text from my friends in a long time.'
'My friends and I don't tend to use grammar or even capitalize our texts, while my parents and teachers use correct punctuation,' Sophie says, adding, 'I think that the unspoken consensus in our generation is that as long as the other person understands what you mean, it works.'
She uses punctuation when she wants to give out a deeper meaning behind her texts, such as exclamation points to 'help soften a message.' 'It's like adding a smiley face to the end of a text in a way,' Sophie says. And the opposite: 'When I'm mad, I tend to use a period instead of an exclamation point because it has such positive connotations.'
Coby, 15, doesn't use a period when texting with friends unless 'maybe if its two sentences or more.' He also has feelings on other punctuation: 'Exclamation points are a bit much because you can't really portray emotion through a phone so using an exclamation point to do it is, like, overkill. … If my parents text me and they use punctuation it doesn't seem weird because I know that's just how they text.'
Ajani says, 'The crying emoji 😭 is the most commonly used amongst everyone that I know.'
Gen Z 'only uses this emoji 😂 to be ironic when something isn't funny,' says Esmé. However, she does use other emojis and GIFs. 'My friends are much more emotive [in texting], sending emojis, multiple exclamation points, and GIFs,' she explains. 'They also obviously use more slang and text shorthand than my parents. I think my friends and I will text shorter thoughts but more of them — like separate texts but five at a time where my parents are more concise and keep it in one longer text.'
While Sophie admits that grammar and punctuation 'can help minimize the likelihood of a misunderstanding,' she also thinks it's good to understand how other people will take your texts. 'It's important to understand and adapt to different people's ways of texting,' she says.
For me, I've found myself adapting my texting style when texting with my Gen Z sister. I'll use way more casual sentences with little-to-no punctuation (and take out all the 'lol's) compared to when I'm texting friends or my husband. If we can meet them in the middle when it comes to texting, maybe Gen Zers can meet us in the middle when it comes to using more formal language and grammar for school essays and in the workplace.
At the end of the day, you can text the way you want to (proper grammar and all), but just know that teens are going to be silently judging you for it — or potentially questioning any hidden meanings. There's no harm in just being considerate of others and understanding how your 'Hey.' might make a teen feel compared to just: 'hey'Best of SheKnows
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