I Threw My Teen a Surprise Party—and It Was an Epic Parenting Move
Let's take a moment of silence for parents raising teens. These years are challenging. It's the hormones, their desperate need for independence, and our inability to let go. Our teens are pushing us away and calling our hugs cringe.
But when it comes to their birthday, we still want to share it with them and make it special. When planning my 15-year-old's birthday, I thought a surprise hotel party was the perfect way to bring us closer together. And I felt it would be something he would truly enjoy.
Surprise parties are not the easiest to pull off but here's what helped me give my teen the ultimate celebration.
Find Your Why
Before embarking on the party planning process, I think it's important to know your why. The truth is we only have a few years left with our teens until they're off to college or to start another new life experience.
Some of us will be empty nesters for the first time and will miss them deeply. We start to wonder if we spent enough time with them or if they still remember the lessons we've taught them. We would love for them to have memories to hold on to that make them feel loved.
The celebration I planned did just that. My son hugged me and thanked me so many times. And if you're with me in this parenting stage you know that hugs are so few and far between.
Choose the Right Location
We opted for a New York City staycation at the Loews Regency Hotel and booked two rooms. Homes in the Big Apple tend to be small and it's really hard to surprise a teen that lives with you. This hotel screamed luxury and that was the feeling that I wanted my son and his friends to experience.
A hotel party also helps to make things stress-free. It's a controlled space and the staff is able to help with setup, catering, and cleanup. My advice is to provide the hotel with enough notice of the party so that they can also be on the ready to help or make it special.
Our concierge provided us with 15-year-old-themed balloons which added a special touch. The Loews team often checked in to see if I needed anything for my setup and were kind enough to source the Scotch Tape (that I swore I packed) for the room decor.
My son and his friends were able to be themselves, play video games, and eat pizza without me hovering because I knew they were just in the other room. This party could easily be pulled off at an event space or a public park, but there was something nice about not having to worry about the weather or cleaning up after teenage boys for the weekend.
Keep It Intimate
Large parties can be overwhelming for just about anyone. The celebrant has to divide their time between making sure they check in with each guest and trying to have fun. It becomes less about the person we're celebrating and more about the people who attend.
For my son's party, we invited three of his closest friends who would stay overnight and a small representation of his village.
It was very important that I spoke to each kid's parent to make sure they had my contact information and a detailed plan so that they felt safe leaving their children in our care. I was raised by a very overprotective mom, so I go out of my way to make sure the parents know that I care and want their children to be safe.
Figure Out Your Lie
We spend our kids' entire lives telling them to be honest, but for a surprise party, a good lie is a must. I am a part of a huge village, and we are constantly helping each other fulfill our dreams. So, when I told my son I was helping one of his aunties on a film shoot, it didn't throw him off one bit.
I warned him the night before that we may need his help on set, but that I would give him a heads up. I left the house early that morning with my Hulken tote bag in tow, and I was off to 'set.'
I kept my son busy that day by scheduling a haircut appointment because I wanted him to show up to his party looking fresh. On his way home from the appointment, I told him I needed him to run to the city with his PlayStation so we could use it as a prop for a scene where the actor was playing video games. He asked if it could be his dad's Xbox, but I told him the script specifically said PS5, and that he needed to bring it over at 2 p.m.
When he arrived in the lobby, one of his aunties escorted him to the 'set.' Moments later, surprise! He was shocked! My son was grateful, and he felt loved.
Personalize the Theme
My son has an obsession with Epic: The Musical. In case you don't know, that's a concept album created by Jorge Rivera-Herrans. It's been hard for me to grasp this idea of a musical that isn't performed anywhere but has millions of TikTok fans.
I had to remind myself that this party was not about me. It was an opportunity for me to learn more about my son. It was an opportunity for his family to learn more about what his current interests are and what he's become since that Thomas the Tank Engine-obsessed 5-year-old.
I learned that Epic is an adaptation of Homer's Odyssey, mixing anime, video games, and musical theater. This allowed me to understand why my son was so into it—it blends all of his favorite things.
Get Some Help When Needed
Parents everywhere have been using artificial intelligence (AI) for help in their day-to-day. Now I understand why. I procrastinated on the decor because I didn't know where to start so I used ChatGPT as a resource.
I uploaded a photo of the hotel room and provided the Epic theme. It delivered a rendering that allowed me to execute the vision without even having to explain what the musical was. Instant relief! I sent the ideas to my cake baker and purchased all the decorations online. The final result was, well, epic!
Add Special Moments in the Itinerary
Create a flexible itinerary that you share with everyone before the event. The first day, we stuck to the plan. It was the surprise party first, followed by the after party at Dave & Buster's, and then gaming in the hotel suite. The second day, the boys opted for brunch, walking around Times Square on their own, and then going to the movies to watch Mission Impossible: The Final Reckoning in 4DX.
One of my favorite moments was having breakfast with my son and his friends. I asked them to put away their phones so that we could have some meaningful conversations. I asked them what they're looking forward to most about college and what they dream of doing when they get older. I tried to ask about any crushes, but I was told that was off-limits.
As my children get older, I realize that time is fleeting, and I want them to have celebrations they won't forget. So, if you're thinking about throwing your teen a surprise party, just do it.
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My advice is to provide the hotel with enough notice of the party so that they can also be on the ready to help or make it special. Our concierge provided us with 15-year-old-themed balloons which added a special touch. The Loews team often checked in to see if I needed anything for my setup and were kind enough to source the Scotch Tape (that I swore I packed) for the room decor. My son and his friends were able to be themselves, play video games, and eat pizza without me hovering because I knew they were just in the other room. This party could easily be pulled off at an event space or a public park, but there was something nice about not having to worry about the weather or cleaning up after teenage boys for the weekend. Keep It Intimate Large parties can be overwhelming for just about anyone. The celebrant has to divide their time between making sure they check in with each guest and trying to have fun. 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I left the house early that morning with my Hulken tote bag in tow, and I was off to 'set.' I kept my son busy that day by scheduling a haircut appointment because I wanted him to show up to his party looking fresh. On his way home from the appointment, I told him I needed him to run to the city with his PlayStation so we could use it as a prop for a scene where the actor was playing video games. He asked if it could be his dad's Xbox, but I told him the script specifically said PS5, and that he needed to bring it over at 2 p.m. When he arrived in the lobby, one of his aunties escorted him to the 'set.' Moments later, surprise! He was shocked! My son was grateful, and he felt loved. Personalize the Theme My son has an obsession with Epic: The Musical. In case you don't know, that's a concept album created by Jorge Rivera-Herrans. It's been hard for me to grasp this idea of a musical that isn't performed anywhere but has millions of TikTok fans. 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So, if you're thinking about throwing your teen a surprise party, just do it. Read the original article on Parents Solve the daily Crossword
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