As my owl chick's life hung by a thread, I started haggling with the universe
At three weeks old my owl chick was on the brink of death
And so my bargains with the Universe began.
If there was a choice between the sale of a house not collapsing
And the bird surviving, then
I'd choose the breath of feathers and remarket immediately.
If there was a choice between the overdue exit of a tenant
Unpaid for long beyond tenure,
And the bird surviving, then
I'd choose the fledgling's life and go to court.
If there was a choice between the rebuild of my computer
Three weeks in the making and with me, still waiting,
And the bird surviving, then
I'd choose the life of the chick and a notebook and pen.
If there was a choice between fixing the fridge freezer
I'd waited a week for in the midst of a heatwave,
And the bird surviving, then
I'd let the meat rot, and the milk go off again.
And so, I learned the unimportance of what does not matter.
With rubber wings that already itch for the sky.
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The Sun
2 days ago
- The Sun
Don't spend a fortune on wedding guest dresses – I found a stunning option is Asda for just £6, I'm 5ft3 & a size 12/14
A SAVVY shopper has bagged stunning wedding guest dresses from Asda for less than a tenner. TikToker Christina Mitsi, who's 5ft 3 and a size 12/14, headed to George at Asda in search of the perfect big-day look and found a whole rail of gorgeous dresses from just £6. And while you might expect the cheapest frock to look like a bargain bin disaster, she reckons it's one of the best of the lot. Among her top picks was a beautiful navy satin-style number – simple, elegant and with a stretchy back that made it 'so comfy' to wear. The dress only set her back £6. She laughed: 'Can you imagine turning up in that and everyone saying, 'Your dress is gorgeous, where's it from?' and you say Asda, six quid.' She also fell in love with a flowy green dress for £15. For something a little more versatile, she tried a multi-way bridesmaid-style gown for £32, which can be tied and styled in several different ways. 'So affordable if you need matching dresses for your bridesmaids, this is a fantastic option,' she said. Christina was seriously impressed with the quality, comfort and price of most of the range. And with dresses starting at just £6, she says it's the perfect excuse to splash out on a fancy handbag and heels instead. 'Why spend more when you can get a lovely dress for £15 or less?' she added. Fans were just as impressed. Kat Farmers new George at Asda Collection One user said: "Wow, you look stunning." Another added: "Love - makes me want to buy it in case I ever get invited to a wedding". While a third said: "They all look gorgeous on you x". It came just days after another savvy fashionista showed off her £3 event dress she bagged from Asda's clearance rail. The bargain-hunter, @finchofautismlife took to TikTok to show off the stunning satin dress from George at Asda. And fans were totally obsessed. 'You look stunning,' one viewer gushed. Another said: 'Wow, I love it, that dress is gorgeous!' Last week, shoppers were sent into a frenzy over a sweet broderie anglaise white mini dress, reduced from £22 to just £15, with rave reviews calling it 'classy', 'lightweight' and the 'perfect fit'. Others have gone wild for a £20 floral dress hailed as 'perfect in every way' , ideal for summer weddings or garden parties, while a £12 leopard print denim shirt dress became a best-seller thanks to its comfy oversized fit and transitional style. But the £3 event dress might just take the crown for the best fashion bargain yet. So if you're in the market for an affordable outfit that'll turn heads without emptying your wallet, it might be worth swinging by your local Asda and checking the rails. The buzz comes after Asda launched its first-ever stand-alone George store in Leeds earlier this year, which could be rolled out nationwide if it proves a hit. The new store, which opened on Saturday, May 10, in the old Asda Living unit at Crown Point Retail Park, is a dream come true for George fans. It's packed with affordable fashion, stylish homeware, must-have toys, and adorable baby gear, plus a brand new café to keep you fuelled mid-shop. There are currently 30 Asda Living stores in the UK, but the supermarket giant is testing the waters with this new George-only concept. Bosses are expected to make a decision later this year on whether more will launch across the country. The George brand, first launched in 1989 by fashion guru George Davies, changed the game as the UK's first supermarket clothing label. By 2004, it had become the nation's biggest clothing retailer, and today it's still going strong, racking up 260 million visits a year to its site and stocking shelves in 560 stores. How to save at Asda Shop the budget range Savvy shopper Eilish Stout-Cairns recommends that shoppers grab items from Asda's Just Essentials range. She said: " Asda's budget range is easy to spot as it's bright yellow! Keep your eyes peeled for yellow and you'll find their Just Essentials range. "It's great value and I've found it has a much wider selection of budget items compared to other supermarkets. Sign up to Asda Rewards The savvy-saver also presses on the importance of signing up to Asda's reward scheme. She said: "Asda Rewards is free to join and if you shop at Asda you should absolutely sign up. "As an Asda Rewards member, you'll get exclusive discounts and offers, and you'll also be able to earn 10% cashback on Star Products. "This will go straight into your cashpot, and once you've earned at least £1, you can transfer the money in your cashpot into ASDA vouchers. We've previously rounded up the best supermarket loyalty schemes - including the ones that will save you the most money. Look out for booze deals Eilish always suggests that shoppers looking to buy booze look out for bargain deals. She said: "Asda often has an alcohol offer on: buy six bottles and save 25%. "The offer includes selected bottles with red, white and rose options, as well as prosecco. There are usually lots of popular bottles included, for example, Oyster Bay Hawkes Bay Merlot, Oyster Bay Hawkes Bay Merlot and Freixenet Prosecco D.O.C. "Obviously, the more expensive the bottles you choose, the more you save." Join Facebook groups The savvy saver also recommends that fans of Asda join Facebook groups to keep in the know about the latest bargains in-store. Eilish said: "I recommend joining the Latest Deals Facebook Group to find out about the latest deals and new launches in store. "Every day, more than 250,000 deal hunters share their latest bargain finds and new releases. "For example, recently a member shared a picture of Asda's new Barbie range spotted in store. "Another member shared the bargain outdoor plants she picked up, including roses for 47p, blackcurrant bushes for 14p and topiary trees for 14p."
Telegraph
2 days ago
- Telegraph
How Lindsay Lohan hit rock bottom, and survived
Just like Britney Spears, Monica Lewinsky, Princess Diana and Amy Winehouse, Lindsay Lohan is a woman who was, for a long time, turned inside out for sport – by the media, by her fans, by her own mother. World-famous by 18 after starring in The Parent Trap, Freaky Friday and Mean Girls – a Disney princess under a curse – Lohan suffered all the projected humiliation and fury the public, through their paparazzi avatars, could heap on her. The tabloids called her La Vida Lohan (a play on la vida loca – 'the crazy life'). And yet, she has, if not thrived, survived. She is not the serious dramatic actress she should be – I would like to see her Medea, her Lady Macbeth – and she is not rich. But she is alive at 39, she has a child and she is working, which means she is sober. (I say no more. Everyone has a right to privacy, even beautiful women.) She is three films into a Netflix deal, and now she headlines Freakier Friday, the sequel to Freaky Friday (2003), with Jamie Lee Curtis. These films meddle with time: the old become young, and the young old. They are charming and flimsy, and they suit Lohan perfectly. The road from child stardom is littered with corpses: few survive the journey because, when forced to be an adult so young, the child cannot grow up. Lohan is the child star that lived and, at 39, she is both young and old. That is her gift, too: to project a lifetime in a glance. New Yorker film critic Richard Brody thinks Lohan one of the best screen actors around: in 2021 he named her performance in Mean Girls the 11th best performance of the century. 'The sheer force of Lohan's personality, the enormous character that bursts even in repose from each glance and each word, is the star quality that classic Hollywood actors had and that seemed to have dwindled over time, as technique became valued over presence'. She was, like many actors, who revel in trying on other people's lives, born into trauma. Her father, Michael, a sometime violent criminal, left her mother when Lohan was three: the year her career began as a child model. (Though they later reunited.) She wrote a song about him in 2005, Confessions of a Broken Heart, which included the heartbreaking line: 'Daughter to father, daughter to father / Tell me the truth, did you ever love me?' She directed the music video, set in a replica of her childhood home in Merrick, Long Island, placed in the windows of a department store so everyone could see. Her father who, we learn from the TV in the video, is released from treatment for addiction, has crashed his car into a telephone pole, and threatens her mother, Dina; her younger sister Aliana (playing herself) weeps in a ballet costume. Lohan sits in couture on the bathroom floor and weeps too, and the window glass shatters. Neither parent could shield her from her fame and its pitfalls: Dina was her manager, and employee. (Freaky Friday, young and old, again.) She also, perhaps unconsciously, exploited her famous daughter: at one point she tried to set up a reality TV show to follow Lohan into rehab. What followed was inevitable. In 2006, Lohan arguably hit rock bottom, professionally at least. She was at the height of her partying, and filming what would be known as a total turkey, Georgia Rule, with Jane Fonda and Felicity Huffman. She was constantly turning up late, or not at all, to set, costing the production a reported $375,000. Eventually, the chief executive of the production company had had enough, and set a furious personal letter to her suite at the Chateau Marmont. 'To date, your actions on Georgia Rule have been discourteous, irresponsible and unprofessional,' he wrote. 'You have acted like a spoilt child and in so doing have alienated many of your co-workers and endangered the quality of this picture.' The letter was then leaked by gossip site The Smoking Gun, and gave her already-flimsy reputation a fatal blow – Lohan became virtually uninsurable in her industry, which might explain why, for decades, her career remained in tatters. In January 2007, Lohan spent the first of six court-ordered stints in rehab; she would spend more than 250 days in rehabilitation by 2014. Between 2007 and 2014, she spent 14 days in prison for drinking under the influence – she crashed her car into a shrubbery and leapt into a stranger's car to chase the mother of her former personal assistant. (In court she had 'f--- u' inscribed on her fingernail.) Cocaine was found in her car and her body. She exhibited signs of anorexia. A judge made her wear a Scram bracelet (a device to monitor alcohol consumption) – in 2013's Inappropriate Comedy she dressed up like Marilyn Monroe in The Seven Year Itch while wearing the Scram bracelet and murdered paparazzi with a gun. The scene included a shot of her crotch from below: the definitive comment on Lohan's relationship with the tabloids. They wanted to see everything, and she let them. Lohan was clearly unwell, but the mocking was relentless: she was only a doll, after all. Saturday Night Live made her play Hermione Granger in a low-cut top. (Considering the treatment of celebrities at the time, presumably the joke was supposed to be on her, but when I watched it this week, it wasn't. She was Cady of Mean Girls again: the luminous straight woman. Even so, it was written by her mentor, Tina Fey, who should have been kinder to her troubled friend.) Lohan's first love, the actor Wilmer Valderrama, told The Howard Stern Show '[her breasts] were real' and 'she's a big fan of waxing'. Appearing on Late Show with David Letterman in 2013 to promote Scary Movie 5, Letterman asks her: 'Aren't you supposed to be in rehab now?' 'May 2nd,' she replies. 'How long will you be in rehab?' 'Three months.' 'How many times have you been in rehab?' 'Several.' 'How will this time be different? What are they rehabbing? What is on their list?' 'We didn't discuss this in the pre-interview…' 'I wish you had come out with the tags [Scram bracelet] on your dress though,' he ponders. 'I know,' says Lohan, 'it would be so funny.' Addiction is dependent on shame. Letterman piled it on her, and the audience laughed. In rehab, fellow addicts chanted the nickname that a friend of Paris Hilton's had coined for Lohan: 'fire crotch'. Her stint as artistic advisor for Ungaro was called 'an embarrassment' and a 'train wreck' by Women's Wear Daily. For I Know Who Killed Me (2007), a horror film about a stripper with a dual personality, she won two Golden Raspberry awards for worst performance – one for each personality. All of this was considered newsworthy but, when Lohan appeared to be assaulted by her then boyfriend, the Russian businessman Egor Tarabasov, on a beach in Mykonos in 2016, there was almost nothing. By contrast, in 2006 a photograph of Lohan with Britney Spears and Paris Hilton appeared on the front of the New York Post under the headline 'Bimbo summit'. It was vicious: an apogee of the popular misogyny of the time. Spears and Lohan had worked in popular entertainment since childhood. They were, despite everything, professionals. Slowly, she got better. She did some wan documentaries and then Netflix called with a deal: they called it the Lindsay Lohanaissance. The material – Falling for Christmas; Irish Wish; Our Little Secret – is hardly radical, but Lohan has it down perfectly. The acting is easy; the living is hard. Even when sick, Lohan was self-mocking and self-aware. She played Elizabeth Taylor in Liz & Dick (2012) and recreated Marilyn Monroe's final photoshoot for New York Magazine in 2008. Lohan was, at 22, playing Monroe at 36 – meddling with time again. It was her doomed period, and I wonder if the idea of closeness to Monroe comforted her – few women know what Lohan went through, but Monroe would. Lohan has a tattoo of a Monroe quote on her arm, which says, 'I restore myself when I'm alone' and she even named her (equally doomed) leggings line after Monroe's birthday: 6126. But of all the doomed screen goddesses, Lohan reminds me most of Judy Garland. She has the same canny sweetness (Taylor was never sweet); the air of eternal, yet weary, youth, like a female Peter Pan; the instinctive professionalism (Monroe, though glorious, never had that); the joy. Garland, a child of vaudevillians, was born in a trunk. Lohan was doing commercials from three. I watched some of them. Even then she had a joy to her, a willingness. The material was bad – it was a jelly advert – but she elevated it. In the end, Lindsay Lohan's story told us more about us than her. Perhaps now, in homage to Freakier Friday, this should be reversed. I can't wait for her Medea.
The Sun
3 days ago
- The Sun
New-season styles are hitting the high st & these are the pieces our fashion editors are buying before they sell out
THE UK is gearing up for another heatwave, but our favourite high-street brands are already thinking ahead. So although we won't be folding away our summer staples just yet, sale season is drawing to a close, and in its place the high street is beginning to drop new-season collections already. There's a fresh wave of transitional pieces arriving in-store and online this week and our fashion editors have been keeping a close eye to curate an edit of their favourite pieces. And it's safe to say we're impressed. Think lightweight knits ideal for layering, along with great woven bag dupes and even footwear is experiencing a seasonal refresh as new styles hit the shelves. So whether you're looking for a wardrobe refresh ahead of autumn or just want to bag the best pieces before they sell out, now is the perfect time to start browsing, as these top picks won't hang around for long. Clemmie Fieldsend, 35, Fashion Editor As much as I hate to wish summer away, seeing new transitional pieces for autumn makes me happy. I stopped in my tracks, well, mid-scroll, when I saw this River Island jumper on my screen. The tie neck and lightweight knit makes it look so premium, as does this Primark bag, which is a double for designer brand Dragon Diffusions' £440 style - what a saving at just £14! A splurge would be this suede Mint Velvet skirt. Suede isn't going anywhere for autumn and I can wear this midi style now, in the winter and for years to come, so I'll definitely get my money's worth. Fashion lovers rush to M&S to snap up perfect pumps that are 'so pretty' for summer - and they come in various colours to match your vibe I've surprised myself with how much I like these suede tie ballerinas from Zara, not something I'd ever consider going for but the neutral, subtle colour and trainer laces are calling me - and I love them. Finally, I keep seeing Bambi print pop up here, there and everywhere, so I'll be snapping up this T-shirt shaped dress from M&S to get ahead of the trend before it kicks off - and before the dress sells out. Abby McHale, 31, Deputy Fashion Editor 3 The high street is starting to drip feed its new-season stock, meaning now is the perfect time to get ahead of the game and purchase pieces that are to be a sure fire hit, before they sell out. I'm loving all the shades of brown that are coming through for the new season, and this blazer from Next is already on lots of people's radar. Brown suede blazers were all the rage last season and this dark chocolate shade is a new update. Argyle is a pattern trickling through to the high street from the catwalks, and this one is a steal at just £20 from Tu Clothing at Sainsbury's. And if you're in the market for a pair of on-trend trainers but you don't want to spend hundreds of pounds, then this pair from H&M is just £32.99! Emily Regan, 25, Fashion Assistant As much as I love my summer wardrobe, I'm an autumn girl at heart - so I was thrilled to see new-season styles are hitting the high street already. I've learned the hard way that the best pieces often drop early and then sell out quickly - that was the case with this gorgeous suede bag from Next, so I'm really pleased that it's relaunched this year. The same goes for George at ASDA's viral leopard-print puffer coat - this year's is a different shape but in the same Ganni-inspired print - and it's already sitting in my wardrobe for when it starts to get chillier outside. I've also got my eye on the latest New Balance 204L shoes - they're a great dupe for the Miu Miu collab at a fraction of a cost. They're tipped to be the next It-girl trainers, but they're selling fast so keep an eye out for restocks and be sure to set a reminder!
