‘How do I make her stop?' — Woman says her neighbour is ‘weird and demanding,' but she struggles to say no to their demands

Independent Singapore

15 hours ago

SINGAPORE: A woman renting a dual-key studio apartment turned to Reddit to express her frustrations about a 'weird and demanding' neighbour who, she says, has repeatedly overstepped boundaries and disrupted her peace at home.
Writing on r/askSingapore, she said the trouble started on the very day her neighbour, a middle-aged Chinese woman with a chihuahua, moved into the adjoining unit.
According to her, the neighbour left so many boxes and bags in their shared foyer on move-in day that she couldn't even open her front door. With a Grab driver waiting downstairs, she had to call out several times before the neighbour finally appeared and casually asked if she needed to go out.
'I had to say 'Excuse me?' like 10 times before she came out and was like, 'Oh, do you need to go out?' So yeah… I climbed over boxes parkour style.'
Things didn't improve in the days that followed. She said the neighbour started banging loudly on her door during the day to ask for things like 'ice and eggs' — seemingly unaware or just indifferent to the fact that she works night shifts and sleeps during the day. Although the disruptions were frustrating, the woman said she continued helping out in an effort to maintain a friendly relationship.
She also shared that her neighbour made a number of odd and intrusive requests, including asking to tap into her WiFi, repeatedly requesting to store food in her fridge, and even wanting to take a look inside her unit.
To make things worse, the neighbour regularly cooked food with such a strong and lingering smell that it would waft through and fill the entire shared foyer.
'My friends and family who came over said it smells like a dead rat. I asked her nicely to maybe do something…but she's delulu and says there's no smell.'
Noise was another major problem. The neighbour would frequently vacuum or use a blender with her front door wide open, letting all the noise flood into the woman's unit. Despite being asked several times to close the door during those activities, the neighbour simply refused. The woman eventually installed soundproofing panels, but said they barely made a difference.
She added that, on top of everything else, the neighbour repeatedly accused her of being messy and told her to clean up, but in reality, it was the neighbour who often left bulky items, such as shoe racks, dog prams, and storage boxes, cluttering the hallway.
'She clutters the whoooole hallway with God knows what. I don't complain. I get bad looks from the other neighbours 'cause they think it's mine, since my main door is shared with her and they see me come out from it.'
'Anyway, the whole 'throw your rubbish' thing—when she leaves out a whole box of recycling for weeks—was the final straw. I texted her a long message, asking that we respect each other's boundaries and just live our separate lives. That was less than a month ago.'
'Today, she texts and asks me if I can dogsit her dog while she's overseas. To feed him and take him for walks, and I don't know why I'm struggling to say no, 'cause the dog is innocent and cute. Help. How do I make her stop? Is she mad? Am I overdramatic?' 'You need to be firmer. And firmer…'
In the comments, many Singaporean Redditors empathised with the woman and urged her to stand her ground.
One Redditor bluntly said, 'She is crazy. You need to draw boundaries immediately, and that means refusing to entertain her crazy requests. That's not being unfriendly.' They went on to advise her to be more assertive moving forward, adding, 'Just say that you're busy and also start to tell her off whenever she does things that you consider inappropriate, e.g., leaving things outside, blocking the foyer, etc.'
Another pointed out that part of the problem may have started because she didn't set limits early on. 'You didn't draw the line from the start and say no. Now, you can either be firm and say no. Or continue to bow down to her requests. It is up to you.'
A third Redditor suggested escalating the issue if necessary. 'You need to be firmer. And firmer. And no more smiles,' they wrote. 'And things that crossed your line, like the dog sitting, immediately complain to the landlord agent. Keep this as black and white for validity to end the lease earlier.'
In other news, a Singaporean employee recently shared online that his colleague abruptly quit after receiving what he felt were minor complaints.
'The first issue wasn't even his fault — it was a paperwork mix-up that's already been settled. Nobody got blamed, and it was resolved without drama,' he wrote.
'The second issue was that he forgot to take a photo of an item. Again, super minor—the customer could easily help us with the photo, and our company already said it's not a big deal. They just reminded him to be more careful next time.'
Read also: SG worker wonders why his colleague overreacted to minor mistakes at work and resigned on the spot
Featured image by Depositphotos (for illustration purposes only)