Abhishek is no Lorelei

Express Tribune

22-03-2025

What is Abhishek Bachchan most famous for? You do not need Einsteinian brains to work this out. Abishek is famous for being one of Bollywood's best known sons. An unfortunate victim of nepotism, perhaps, if we take his father's word for it, but not even Big B can deny that Abhishek's path to glory was possible only in his position as a son first and foremost.
But as we have seen this past week, this most treasured Bollywood son has now stirred the pot by assuming his role on the other side of the parenting fence. As a man who has amassed thirteen years of work experience as a father – and also clocked in the hours playing a devoted father in his most recent film, Be Happy – Abhishek has cracked the whole parenting thing, and was not shy about sharing his views during a recent interview with NDTV.
"There is a certain decorum, not just because I gave you life, but because I am responsible for raising you, caring for you, loving you and providing for you," he shared. "It's essential to be friendly with children, but you should avoid becoming their friend."
Uncommon sense abound
As a father, Abhishek appears to be aware that his daughter has enough friends in her life, and that what she really needs is a responsible adult. Although he does not delve into details of the decorum he demands, his approach is the one taken by every other parent who has denied their kids unfettered access to social media, has a homework routine in place, nurses high academic expectations, and does not take kindly to eye-rolling and door-slamming. In other words: this is what sensible parents do. They may not quite be a military general, but they certainly try to be a responsible adult and be a parent.
However, if you are of the opinion, "Yes, yes, we all know this, Abhishek's words reek of nothing more than common sense,", then I am afraid the denizens of social media will have no qualms about letting you know how stupidly uninformed you are. Whilst certain commenters – the ones endowed with common sense – agreed that Abhishek was quite right, others had no inhibitions about flexing their fingers and embarking on a keyboard marathon as soon as Abhishek's common sense stance hit Pinkvilla's Instagram page.
"My parents are my best friend and they treated me like their best friend too," penned one irked commenter. "It's not true that if you become a friend of your child you will be spoiling them."
Another similarly irritated follower wrote, "Wrong advice. Parents are your first and best friends."
Wait, there is more to come. "So, so wrong," lamented another disappointed user. "Parents should always be friends to their kids. It helps to lessen the barrier and kids feel that comfort of sharing things."
We can probably safely conclude from such pearls of wisdom that, unlike Abhishek, these trigger happy social media users are probably not parents. For a start, the only qualifications they have to support their claims is their assured steadfast friendship with their own parents. Because these parents have so successfully duped their spawn into believing they are all best buddies, Abhishek's critics remain of the staunch opinion that since he does not follow the Lorelei Gilmore handbook of parenting, the man must be a drill sergeant – 0r at least certainly more in line with the whistle-blowing emotionally shunted Captain von Trapp in The Sound of Music.
Beginning friendly relations
What Abishek's child-free critics have not taken into account is the very real question about whether or not a thirteen-year-old would even accept the hand of friendship from a parent. A toddler or even a malleable six-year-old may be happy and willing to allow it, but as those who have suffered the whims of hormonal adolescents are painfully aware, this does not last forever. In the eyes of a cynical word-weary teenager, there is nobody on Earth as tragic, misinformed and deluded as a parent.
Those in the trenches of adolescent parenting will be made painfully aware by their children that everyone else's parents are doing a much better job. As global teen-led research stipulates, everyone else's parents let their kids remain on their phone all night without switching off the Wi-Fi and allow them to sleep until noon. According to this same teen-led research, everyone else's parents also let them ride their bikes without a helmet, leave the house without a coat in sub-zero temperatures, stay out with their friends on a school night until 2AM, allow them to have a lone cup of espresso for breakfast, and do not mind if they vape.
We do not know if Abhishek's daughter Aaradhya will attempt to use this teenage brand of logic on her father, but what we do know is, thanks to Abhishek's declared love for decorum, he is unlikely to fall for any of it. Thanks to his decision to take his responsibilities as a father seriously, the chances are good that the Bachchan household will not be unleashing an entitled brat with zero worth ethic on the universe in the years to come.
Mastering adulthood
Perhaps it is the word 'decorum' that rubbed volatile social media users up the wrong way. Perhaps if Abhishek had branded his message a bit better and said something like, "I adore my daughter to bits, but I want to give her the best chance in life and be the guiding force she needs," Instagram users may not have been so quick to spit out "Wrong advice".
Fortunately for common sense, Abhishek does not appear to be the type who will cave to netizens trying to correct his way of thinking. Also, while we are at it, he is also not the only celebrity parent who has gone public with his thoughts on how to be a responsible adult. On the other side of the world, according to The Independent, Sherlock star Benedict Cumberbatch has gone public with how he will not be giving his children a phone until they turn 14 and will keep them off social media until 16. It is unlikely the Cumberbatch kids will view this as friendly behaviour, but will they thank him later in life after being spared a spate of teenage Snapchat-originated bullying? As before, Einsteinian intellect is not required to figure out the answer to this question.
So Abhishek can carry on with his expectations of decorum from his daughter in exchange for providing for her and being a good global citizen. And whilst he is at it, keep her off social media so she can be spared the shock of learning just how abundant it is with fearless uninformed keyboard warriors.