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Aarti is a full-time sub-editor and part-time Bollywood enthusiast. She started her career at Cosmopolitan India, and has written for several titles since, including Khaleej Times, Vogue, Marie Claire, Grazia, Women's Health and Harper's Bazaar.
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Khaleej Times
a day ago
- Khaleej Times
Akshay Kumar's 'Housefull 5' fails to deliver the laughs
Cast: Akshay Kumar, Sanjay Dutt, Jacqueline Fernandez, Nana Patekar Rating: 1/5 stars Truth no. 1: This is a difficult feature to write. The task is to review a movie and that's where the biggest problem lies — Housefull 5 is not a movie. It is a 165-minute long gag featuring fairly good-looking people on a pretty set, which we are told is a cruise, pretending to act in a feature film. Truth no. 2: I was actually looking forward to it and went to the cinemas fully prepared. The brain cells had been switched off, reasoning and rationale had been dismissed, and expectations were carefully set to sub-zero. Bad jokes? I am game! Lame scenes where a man hits a monkey and the monkey hits the man? No problem. Foolish puns? They can be funny! Truth no. 3: Tarun Mansukhani's name as director raised one's hopes. After all, the man gave us Dostana, a funny, urban, and intelligent comedy all those years ago. Even if the Housefull series, by its very nature, is defined by below-the-belt humour, perhaps there would be some moments of genuine, albeit silly, laughter — much-needed in these grim times. I now realise it's futile to even hope. Bollywood slapstick comedies of the Housefull variety are always given a long rope. They have set the bar so low that each previous film seems better than the current one. Perhaps the fifth 'installment' in this 'franchise' will seem really good when the 10th edition comes out a few years later. Simply because, when you think back, the first Housefull (2010), directed by Sajid Khan, actually seems like comedy gold compared to this one. So, what is Housefull 5 all about? If you must know, it's set aboard a cruise where a rich old man (Ranjeet) dies amid his birthday celebrations, leaving his fortune to his estranged son, Jolly. Three men (Akshay Kumar, Abhishek Bachchan, and Ritesh Deshmukh) accompanied by three women (Jacqueline Fernandez, Nargis Fakhri, and Sonam Bajwa) turn up claiming to be Jolly. The team on the other side comprising Fardeen Khan, Dino Morea, Chitrangada Singh, Johnny Lever, Shreyas Talpade, and Chunky Pandey (don't ask who plays what, it doesn't matter), have to find out who the real Jolly is. Suddenly, a few murders take place, which need to be investigated by two suspended Scotland Yard cops, Bhidu and Baba (Sanjay Dutt and Jackie Shroff — so original!) with help from their boss (Nana Patekar). Apparently, this is a film that has two different endings. Depending on which theatre you walk into, the murderer probably changes. There is no logic for this stunt, but then when was the last time mainstream Bollywood did anything logical? In this Hangover -meets- Housefull -meets- Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron ripoff, there is absolutely no story, screenplay, plot points, performances ,or technique that can be discussed or dissected. So let's just list out some sequences that make up this…ahem…film, and you can take the call: ● A CGI ship where the entire madness is set. ● Characters named Julius, Jalabuddin, Jalbhushan, Kanchi, Sasikala, and Dhagdu Hulgund. ● CGI animals, notably a parrot and monkey, out to avenge the treatment meted out to their father by Akshay Kumar in the first film and end up punching him (lucky monkey!). ● One lead character suffers from a weird ailment that sees him doze off every few minutes. ● An elongated Priyadarshan-esque climax featuring the actors floating in a room, holding on to each other in a line when the villain switches on the ship's propeller. ● Some funny one-liners: - 'The ship wants to know' says a reporter seeking to interview Ranjeet. - Chitrangada to Chunky, after a parrot dies: 'May he rest in peace.' Chunky replies: 'He is resting in pieces.' - Akshay helping Jacqeline find her sheer dress after they 'accidentally' spend a night together: ' Yeh machli ki jaal tumhari hai?' (Does this fishing net belong to you?) An unhinged comedy requires actors who genuinely let themselves go. But in this case, the stars seem like they are in a hurry to mouth their lines and rush to the nearest restaurant. Kumar, who has the meatiest part, returns to comedy after eons and in some scenes, one can see flashes of the actor who entertained us with his comic timing in movies like Hera Pheri, Garam Masala, Bhagam Bhag and Housefull. But in this film, most of the time, he is busy making obnoxious faces in the name of physical comedy. Abhishek Bachchan is so disinterested, he gives competition to Fardeen Khan and Dino Morea. Only Riteish Deshmukh comes across as natural and organic. As for the other seniors, Shroff and Dutt, let's just say, it's cringe to watch them mouth inanities and lust over women half their ages. The worst part: the best actors known for their comedy, Johnny Lever and Chunky Panday, are given the short shrift with barely a few scenes to make their mark. There is no point even mentioning the ladies whose only brief is to wear the briefest dresses and stand like pretty dolls. It's hard to say who's worse! One can only hope all the stars — and there are plenty of them in this one — were paid well to be part of yet another obnoxious abomination masquerading as cinema in Bollywood. One would imagine the script — if there was any — was written by artificial intelligence (AI). But then, AI is really smart. This had to be written by humans inhabiting the Hindi film industry these days. If lunacy and mild laughter is what you are looking for, then Housefull 5 can be your lazy Saturday watch. For the rest of the world, there's Netflix and chill. To round it off, not just the ship, even the nation wants to know: just when will we get a Bollywood comedy that makes us really laugh?
Khaleej Times
2 days ago
- Khaleej Times
Lara Dutta pens emotional note as she mourns dad's demise
A few days after the demise of her father LK Dutta, Bollywood actor Lara Dutta Bhupathi on Wednesday took to Instagram and penned down an emotional note. In her post, she talked about how she learnt to "debate, argue, negotiate, reason and dazzle" from her father. "My wonderful, brave, fighter of a father, went quietly into the good night on the 31st of May...... He fought long and hard against an illness that debilitated him over the last few months.... He bore pain with the stoicism of a battle worn soldier and displayed a courage and willingness to beat the odds, that sometimes defied all logic..... He rewrote any concept I had of the body breaking down or succumbing to an inevitable moments with my father are etched into my bones forever..... my dad hoisting a 3 year old me up on his shoulders to look at the stars at night and call out all the constellations...... the feet that I stood on as a five year old to learn to hand that I held as I scampered as fast as I could beside him to match his stride as we walked through eucalyptus groves and planned how I would study under Carl Sagan..... the lap I sat on while I air played an imaginary piano to the sound of his favourite Richard Clayderman tape," she wrote. "I learnt to be brave, I learnt to be fearless, I learnt to stand up for myself and for others, I learnt to tell a good joke, even at my own expense..... I learnt to try and be selfless.... I learnt it all from him.....I also know that this is not the end..... whether physically here or not, he and I are somewhere, on some plane, in some dimension, in some alternate reality, dancing a waltz together, with my hand in his .I carry your heart dad...... I carry it in my heart." View this post on Instagram A post shared by Lara Dutta Bhupathi (@larabhupathi) Lara Dutta's father, retired wing commander LK Dutta, breathed his last on May 31.
Khaleej Times
2 days ago
- Khaleej Times
UAE summer: Viral infections among children on the rise, warn paediatricians
Doctors are reporting an increase in paediatric patients in recent weeks, with many children presenting symptoms of high-grade fever, diarrhoea, vomiting, and persistent coughs. With seasonal illnesses expected to persist during transitional weather, both healthcare professionals and educators are urging parents to prioritise full recovery, hydration, and preventive measures to curb the spread of infections and safeguard the wider community. Dr Amjad Mouhammad Haider, Consultant Pediatrician at International Modern Hospital Dubai, told Khaleej Times, "We have observed a noticeable increase in pediatric visits over the past few weeks. Most children are presenting with high-grade fevers, persistent coughs, sore throats, vomiting, diarrhea, and fatigue. We're also seeing many cases of viral infections such as upper respiratory tract infections and gastroenteritis.' He added, 'While the majority are manageable on an outpatient basis, a small percentage - especially infants or children with underlying health conditions - have required hospital admission for dehydration or severe symptoms.' Stay up to date with the latest news. Follow KT on WhatsApp Channels. Haider emphasised that the increasing temperatures are playing a role. 'The rise in temperature is definitely a contributing factor, particularly due to heat exhaustion and dehydration.' However, medics also pointed out that beyond the climate, the return to school and close-contact environments is a major concern. 'As schools and daycare centers are operating at full capacity, viruses tend to spread more easily in such close-contact environments. Additionally, poor hydration and dietary imbalances during the hotter months can weaken a child's immune response,' added Haider. Echoing this, other healthcare professionals pointed out that the primary reason children are falling ill is the spread of viral infections among students. Dr Noher Moustafa, Specialist Pediatrics at Medeor Hospital, Abu Dhabi, said, 'This especially happens in school settings where close contact makes transmission easier. It is quite common for children to become unwell during the school season. Increased interaction in group environments tends to heighten the risk of viral infections during this period.' Common illnesses Schools are also witnessing the impact first-hand. Sarah Brannon, Head of Preparatory School at Brighton College Dubai, confirmed the uptick in common illnesses. 'At this time of year, we are seeing some outbreaks of common illnesses like the flu, colds, and stomach bugs which are typical during seasonal changes. The health and wellness of our pupils – and the wellbeing of the wider community – is most important to us.' She detailed the school's response policy, explaining, 'We have a clear Healthy School policy in place where we closely monitor pupils' health and advise parents not to send their children to school if they show symptoms. Our policy requires pupils to stay home until they are symptom-free for at least 24 hours without the use of medication – this helps ensure they are well enough to be at school and engage in activities when they return.' Follow medical advice She added, 'Additionally, there is a chance of spreading illness to others in the school community, including classmates, teachers, teammates and other staff. Parents should be considerate to the rest of the school community and help us maintain a safe and healthy environment for all. To support both individual well-being and the health of our wider school community, we strongly encourage families to follow medical advice and our school's return-to-school guidelines closely, ensuring pupils return when they're truly ready.' S. Reshma, Principal and School Director at Regent Gulf Indian High School, underlined the long-term implications of rushing children back to school too early. "There has been a noticeable increase in the seasonal illness not only among students but staff as well. When the child returns to school before full recovery, there are chances that a child may remain unwell for greater number of days resulting in increased absence and possibly developing complications later.'
