‘My dad is much happier with Bebo': Ibrahim Ali Khan says parents Amrita Singh and Saif shielded him from ‘pain' of divorce; can a child still feel distressed?

Indian Express

13-05-2025

When parents separate, it's often assumed that the emotional fallout is inevitable — especially for the children. But what happens when both parents consciously protect their kids from the bitterness of a breakup?
Actor Ibrahim Ali Khan recently offered a rare glimpse into his experience of growing up in a divorced household in an interview with GQ. When asked about his parents separating when he was young, he revealed, 'I was four or five years old, so I don't remember much. It was probably different for Sara as she was older. But my mom and dad have done a great job of ensuring I didn't feel the pain that comes with a broken home. I never saw them lose their cool at each other. Some things are just not meant to be.'
He went on to add, 'Now my dad is much happier with Bebo [Kareena Kapoor] and I've got two very handsome and naughty brothers. And my mom is the best mother ever. She takes great care of me, and I live with her. It's all good.' His words hint at something many advocate for but few manage to implement — a peaceful, respectful post-divorce environment for the children's sake.
'Yes, absolutely,' says Neha Parashar, clinical psychologist, Mindtalk. She adds that even without visible conflict, children can internalise feelings of loss, confusion, or divided loyalty when parents separate. 'Just because a separation is peaceful on the surface doesn't mean the child has emotionally processed the change. Children often pick up on subtle shifts in dynamics, like altered routines, emotional absences, or unspoken tensions.'
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According to Parashar, some children may also suppress their discomfort out of a desire to protect one or both parents, especially if they feel everyone else has 'moved on.' 'This can lead to quiet distress that doesn't always show up as overt behavior problems. Attachment issues can stem not just from how the separation occurs, but from how safe, heard, and emotionally connected the child continues to feel with both parents after it happens,' she notes.
The solution? Therapeutic spaces or open conversations with trusted adults can help the child make sense of their emotions, even when there isn't 'visible conflict.' Parashar explains, 'It's not about whether parents fought or not, but about how supported and secure the child felt during and after the transition.'
That sense of support and resilience also seems to echo in how Ibrahim has dealt with personal challenges beyond his family life. During the same interview, the Nadaaniyan actor also opened up about dealing with a hearing disability since birth. 'Soon after I was born, I had very bad jaundice and that went straight to my brainstem. I went on to lose quite a bit of my hearing and that impacted my speech,' he said, noting that he has worked hard on improving his speech. 'My speech is something that I've had to work hard on since I was a child, with coaches and therapists. It's not perfect; I'm still working really hard on it.'
Ibrahim's experiences reflect his strength — the kind that usually comes not just from overcoming physical challenges, but from growing up in an environment where resilience, acceptance, and emotional safety were prioritised.