Life's unmissable moments include holding a newborn and getting keys in hand
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10 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Top Trump and his Tartantastic Turnberry Golf Triumph
Junior jinxed The Diary has been reporting on Donald Trump's magisterial visit to Scotland, where the great, the good and the genuflecting arrived at his Turnberry compound, then queued in a long line to ask the American President if he could recommend a decent sand wedge to use on the golf course. Or perhaps they were there to plead for a sympathetic tariff arrangement. Such abject grovelling reminds us of the arrangement at Diary Towers, where every morning our gang of craven reporters crawls on hands and knees into the Editor's office to have their orders for the day barked at them from across the Supreme Leader's desk. This can be a tad humiliating, as you can imagine, though it suits the Diary's 106-year-old copyboy, Junior, who can't walk upright any more, ever since that last operation when he got his knees replaced, his hips replaced, his ankle bones replaced and all of his spine. (We hear rumours that the surgeon who undertook the procedure gave the spine to his son as a birthday present, telling him it was a xylophone.) Gone are the days when Junior was a mere stripling of a lad, aged 105, and would scoot into the office on his skateboard. Still, there are many pleasures remaining to him, such as helping to compile the following classic tales from our archives… The Graduate We recall a prison English teacher who once asked if the class knew what a sentence was. Another teacher in East Ayrshire asked a pupil what his big brother, who she had previously taught, was doing. 'Six months,' came the replay. Spend, spend, spend A Hamilton T-shirt printers had a customer who requested a shirt made for his wife who had recently returned from New York, and a hefty credit card bill had ensued. He asked for a shirt with the usual "I Love NY" on the front, and on the back "Veni, Vidi, Visa", roughly translated as 'I came, I saw, I spent'. Petals and petting A reader was in an Edinburgh florist shop and spotted a chap ordering a large bouquet. The florist wrote down the message he wanted on the card, then thinking of a final flourish to add, asked: 'Will you want kisses?' 'I'll be expecting a lot more than that,' the chap replied. Brought to book We always assumed that an author signing a book added to its value for the reader. Not so in Glasgow's Waterstone's in Sauchiehall Street, where one of our correspondents watched as an elderly woman picked up a signed novel, only for her helpful friend to tell her: 'Don't get that one. Someone's written on it.' Cutting comment 'He must be great at his job,' said a young lad staring in the window of a key- cutting shop in Glasgow. 'Look at all the trophies he's got.'
Yahoo
17 minutes ago
- Yahoo
National airline is offering long-distance friends the chance to reunite - here's how
A national airline is offering an opportunity to reunite friends who live far apart through its latest competition. Loganair's Season of Connections campaign is searching for the UK's longest-distance friendships, with the winning pair set to receive return flights to finally meet again in person. Lyn MacDonald, head of marketing and brand at Loganair, said: "This campaign is all about celebrating the real, meaningful connections that define our lives, and demonstrating the role regional travel can play in bringing people together. "Whether it's been months or years since friends last met in person, we want to help make that reunion possible." Read more: ScotRail issues travel warning to fans heading to Oasis gigs The competition is open to anyone with a long-distance friend. Entrants are encouraged to share their stories via Loganair's Instagram or Facebook pages, explaining why their friendship deserves a reunion. The competition runs until Sunday, August 17, and the winning duo will be announced later this summer with the reunion to take place in autumn. This new campaign follows the success of Loganair's Christmas giveaway, which offered a year of free flights to one winner. Inspired by the airline's festive advert Loganair, Actually, the giveaway drew a huge response from the public. Loganair hopes this new campaign will create another memorable moment, this time between friends kept apart by distance. Read more: Glasgow man speechless after scooping £725k holiday home and £69k Audi The airline's network spans destinations across the UK and beyond, including remote islands such as Orkney, the Isle of Man and Guernsey, as well as major cities like Glasgow, Manchester and Edinburgh. Loganair's codeshare agreements with British Airways and KLM also make it possible for passengers to travel even further to see loved ones. Earlier this year, Loganair was ranked second in the Which? annual customer survey of short-haul airlines, earning a 72% customer score. The airline received a five-star rating for customer service and four stars for booking, boarding, and cleanliness. For more information or to enter the competition, visit Loganair's Instagram or Facebook pages and follow the link in their bio.
Yahoo
27 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Samaritans to host summer ball to support charity
The Samaritans of Ipswich and East Suffolk are set to host a summer ball to support their work with people in emotional distress. The 'Spectacular Summer Ball' will take place at The Talbooth in Dedham on Friday, September 5, with proceeds going to the branch, which offers support locally and as part of the national network. Entertainment on the night will include performances by local bands, the Fever Pitch Barbershop Quartet and The Bears. Nicholas Pandolfi, who is formerly of BBC Radio Suffolk, will act as Master of Ceremonies. The evening will feature a live auction with three headline prizes, a silent auction, raffle, and games. Donations have been received from local organisations and individuals, and further contributions or expressions of interest in the silent auction can be made by contacting ipswich@ A small number of tickets remain available and can be booked by emailing the organisers. The event is set to start at 7pm and tickets are priced at £90.
