After Her Mom Died From Breast Cancer, She Found a Creative Way to Include Her in Her Newborn's Life (Exclusive)
Mandi Arneson and her mom, Sandy Andreini, were super close before Andreini passed in October 2022
Arneson left her job to become her full-time caretaker in 2013 when her mom was initially diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer
Despite her mother's passing, Arneson found a way to include her mom in the milestones of her child's lifeMandi Arneson and her mom, Sandy Andreini, were as close as two people could be.
They talked on the phone multiple times a day, went shopping together and never missed an episode of The Bachelor on Mondays. So when Andreini was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in 2013, Arneson was devastated. Although Andreini underwent treatment, she eventually became seriously ill due to complications.
Arneson ultimately left her nursing job and moved back home to care for her mom full-time, alongside her dad and three sisters. For nearly a decade, the family stood by Andreini's side.
'Being her caregiver was the greatest privilege of my life, and I would do it a thousand times over if I had the chance,' Arneson, 28, tells PEOPLE exclusively.
'Despite countless challenges, she remained positive and resilient. She always said she wouldn't let cancer win — she wanted to live for us,' the Milwaukee, Wis., native adds. 'One of her biggest goals that final summer was to build up enough strength to attend my wedding that September. She worked incredibly hard every single day — and she made it. She was glowing that day.'
But just one month after Arneson's wedding, on Oct. 18, 2022 — which happened to be Arneson's birthday — her mom passed away at 59. While it was heartbreaking, Arneson says the greatest gift was knowing her mom was finally free from pain.
As the years passed, the absence Andreini left behind continued to be deeply felt. That grief grew when Arneson found out she was pregnant in February 2024.
'I couldn't call my mom to share the news, and it broke my heart knowing she wouldn't be here to meet her granddaughter,' she says. 'I never imagined going through motherhood without her by my side. I always pictured her there, watching me become a mom.'
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Despite not having her mom physically present, Arneson found comfort in her husband, family and friends. She had a smooth pregnancy and welcomed a happy, healthy baby girl named Averie.
Every day she spends with Averie, Arneson says she finds herself thinking about her own mom and the incredibly special bond they shared. 'It's in the little moments I share with Averie that I feel my mom's presence the most,' she says.
Recently, a special idea came to the family — one that felt like a meaningful way to keep Andreini close.
Arneson's niece and nephew had been leaving pictures and letters in her mausoleum since she passed, so the family knew there was a small opening near her casket where keepsakes could be placed. So, one day, when Arneson, her husband Connor and Averie were visiting her mom's grave, her dad suggested she print a picture of Averie and slip it to her through the crack.
"That's when Connor had the idea to make it a tradition — monthly pictures of Averie, keeping my mom updated on how her granddaughter is growing," she says. "Averie was already five months old at the time, so we had some catching up to do, but now it's something we'll continue to do. Every month, we'll share new pictures of our sweet Averie with my mom, ensuring she's always a part of her life."
'It's definitely not the way I ever imagined updating my mom on how much my baby is growing, but it's so incredibly special to me,' the mom adds. 'It feels like our own little mailbox to heaven, a way for me to stay connected to her. Every time we do this, I know it will bring me a little closer to her, and it's a reminder that even though she's not physically here, she's still a part of our lives in her own way.'
Not long ago, Arneson took to TikTok to share the new tradition, and to her surprise, the video gained the attention of TikTokers, garnering over 250,000 views.
Despite her small following, she thought it was so cool how much attention the TikTok received and how the message touched so many people.
'I will never stop honoring and talking about my incredible mom," she says. "I want Averie, and all of my future children, to feel like they really know her and understand just how amazing she was.'
'I hope people can take away the importance of finding ways to keep the memory of loved ones alive, even when they're no longer here. Little traditions, like sharing pictures or updates, can help keep that bond strong. For anyone going through something similar, it's a reminder that it's okay to create your own rituals to help you feel close to those you've lost.'
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