Finding love at any age in Japan: Advice & insights
By Hilary Keyes
We all know that the dating scene changes as we age. So, how does finding love at different decades of our lives play out for foreign women in Japan?
Dating In Your 20s
Dating In Your 30s
Dating In Your 40s
Dating At 50 & Beyond
Dating In Your 20s
Image: iStock: Toru-Sanogawa
Dating in your 20s in Japan is a fun, lighthearted experience — for the most part. While the number of people in relationships at this age has been on a steady decline in Japan in recent years, there are still plenty of people out there enjoying casual relationships at least.
Most foreign women who have come to Japan in their 20s are fresh out of university and want to enjoy their experience in a different country. Dating isn't about finding a soulmate per se, but meeting new people and seeing if you and life in Japan are a good fit for one another.
'I came to Japan because I wanted to experience something new. I've been to so many exciting places, met tons of people, and I've dated a bit too. Nothing serious, not yet, and the guys I've met are mostly in the same mindset' (Emma, American, 24).
The one piece of advice that I would give to anyone dating in Japan in their 20s is to understand yourself first. You're in a new country, things are different, and it's easy to get swept up in that excitement. Don't lose sight of who you are and what you want out of life in the process.
Dating In Your 30s
Honestly, dating in your 30s is just as much fun as it is in your 20s, although how you go about it is different. This is true no matter where you are in the world, although in Japan it can seem somewhat daunting at first.
According to My Navi Women, your 30s are a crossroads. Do you want to get married, have children, focus on your career, change careers, etc.? For many, this means being more settled and taking a more level-headed approach to future relationships/marriage than in their 20s.
One major part of dating in your 30s as a foreign woman in Japan is looking for someone who is actually available and not in a situationship, engaged but looking, married, or worst of all, married with children.
'I got out of a long-term relationship recently and started dipping my toe in the dating scene. It's not as bad as I thought it would be, but the number of married guys looking for a 'friends with benefits' is shocking' (Lindsey, American, 35).
'At first, I started on Tinder and Bumble, but there are a lot of food pictures and the like instead of people with anything relevant about themselves on their profiles. I joined a few chat groups during the pandemic, and that led to making actual friends, and I've been on a few dates because of that' (Jane, Canadian, 37).
The best advice if you're dating in your 30s in Japan comes from a friend of mine. 'Don't be desperate. Being in a relationship, getting married, having kids, those are all good things, but you can't rush into them. You'll regret it if you do' (Alison, Australian, 39).
Dating In Your 40s
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