I had terrible health anxiety - then my worst fears were confirmed
I suddenly blurted out: 'Do I have breast cancer?'
The ultrasound technician paused, considered the physical examination I'd had earlier, in which a consultant found a thickening in my breast and replied: 'I'm sorry Georgie, but there's a 99% chance that you do.'
As soon as I heard those words, I shouted for my mum and a nurse ran out to find her. I broke down sobbing and felt like I was going to be sick.
As someone with health anxiety – a condition where you spend so much time worrying about getting sick that it takes over your life – it was confirmation of my worst nightmare.
I'd always struggled with medical appointments, constantly fearful of what doctors would say. Procedures like smear tests terrified me – I was always expecting the worst results, and had to have someone accompany me to ease my nerves.
My health anxiety went through the roof in 2018 when my auntie died of breast cancer. Over the years that followed, it continued to worsen as other close family members were affected by cancer, including my cousin, who was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2022.
I started to worry about everything – from choking on my food, to going anywhere new in case I got ill.
I'd obsess about all the ways things could go wrong and Googling symptoms of deadly illnesses every time I felt the slightest twinge.
One night, at my local pub with my fiancé, Jon, I got myself into a complete panic about a pizza we'd eaten. It was really oily, and my tummy didn't feel right. It became the only thing I could think about, asking Jon what he thought this was a sign of and whether I should book in to see the doctor.
I knew I needed to get some help so I referred myself to the anxiety and mental health team at the Gloucestershire Royal Hospital the very next day.
Just a few months later, I was diagnosed with severe health anxiety aged 27 in 2022. Getting the diagnosis gave me a sense of relief from knowing that there was actually something wrong and I wasn't just being ridiculous.
Then I started a six-week course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, which helps people with mental health problems challenge their thinking. The sessions really helped and we explored some of the reasons why I had health anxiety – including how a two-week hospital stay for pneumonia when I was four years old could have contributed.
This made a real difference to my mental health. One of the things that helped was writing down my fears and crossing them off when I proved there was nothing to worry about.
So when I noticed I had an inverted nipple, and some shoulder pain, I tried to stay calm. I reassured myself that I was young and healthy, and that, only if it persisted, would I get a doctor's appointment.
That's how, in June 2024, I ended up in front of my GP on my own, which is something I would have never been able to do before.
So my world turned upside down when, a few weeks later I was told there was a 99% chance of me having breast cancer.
In the three weeks it took to confirm, I didn't want to leave the house. I read everything there was to know about different types of breast cancer. I'd already lost my aunt to the disease – I thought I was going to die too.
I knew I needed more help so I decided to get in touch with the Thirlestaine Breast Centre, who had initially examined me, and who put me straight in touch with a psychiatrist.
I tried to protect Jon and my family as I didn't want to worry or upset them but with the psychiatrist, I didn't have to hold anything back. They helped me see things more clearly and put everything into perspective.
I needed their support more than ever when I was told I had stage two lobular breast cancer.
Further tests revealed it was more aggressive than thought and had spread to several lymph nodes. I'd need to throw everything at it, including chemotherapy and radiotherapy.
Within a fortnight, I had to be signed off work due to my mental health and then a few weeks later I had a single mastectomy and nine lymph nodes removed.
Georgina Shaw is supporting lobular breast cancer research taking place at the Breast Cancer Now Toby Robins Research Centre at The Institute of Cancer Research, London which is celebrating 25 years of life-changing discoveries. For more information visit Breast Cancer Now here.
I also underwent genetic testing, which confirmed that I had a PALB2 gene alteration, which means I'm at greater risk of developing breast cancer. I had been racking my brains as to why I had developed breast cancer and now I had a solid explanation why.
I hated going into hospitals and was once physically sick going into one due to my health anxiety.
This was a huge problem because I was now faced with daily appointments and check-ups.
I had to take a sick bowl with me everywhere. And one consultant even said to me: 'I've never met anyone who brought a sick bowl to an appointment before.'
Eventually, I was prescribed a drug called Sertraline, which helps with anxiety. Alongside this, I found socialising and gentle exercise really helpful too.
One year later, I've now finished active treatment and have gone from dreading medical appointments to feeling a little lost without them.
I've recently started a preventative treatment, as I'm at high risk of my breast cancer coming back. More Trending
While the treatment itself helps with some of my anxiety, it's also incredibly reassuring to know that charities like Breast Cancer Now are researching more effective treatments for lobular breast cancer – giving hope to people like me and helping to save more lives.
My advice to anyone struggling with health anxiety is talk to a health professional – don't wait to get help.
I've needed a lot of help with my mental health and have been to some very dark places over the last year, but having a major disease makes you look at life very differently.
View More »
I'm now much calmer and able to embrace new experiences without fear – a world away from the panic I felt during that ultrasound.
Do you have a story you'd like to share? Get in touch by emailing James.Besanvalle@metro.co.uk.
Share your views in the comments below.
MORE: I was 19 when I realised I'm not special – I'm just gay
MORE: I want you to speak to me – not the person pushing my wheelchair
MORE: I took up running – but family members' responses shocked me
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I had terrible health anxiety - then my worst fears were confirmed
I was in the middle of an ultrasound when panic completely took over. I suddenly blurted out: 'Do I have breast cancer?' The ultrasound technician paused, considered the physical examination I'd had earlier, in which a consultant found a thickening in my breast and replied: 'I'm sorry Georgie, but there's a 99% chance that you do.' As soon as I heard those words, I shouted for my mum and a nurse ran out to find her. I broke down sobbing and felt like I was going to be sick. As someone with health anxiety – a condition where you spend so much time worrying about getting sick that it takes over your life – it was confirmation of my worst nightmare. I'd always struggled with medical appointments, constantly fearful of what doctors would say. Procedures like smear tests terrified me – I was always expecting the worst results, and had to have someone accompany me to ease my nerves. My health anxiety went through the roof in 2018 when my auntie died of breast cancer. Over the years that followed, it continued to worsen as other close family members were affected by cancer, including my cousin, who was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2022. I started to worry about everything – from choking on my food, to going anywhere new in case I got ill. I'd obsess about all the ways things could go wrong and Googling symptoms of deadly illnesses every time I felt the slightest twinge. One night, at my local pub with my fiancé, Jon, I got myself into a complete panic about a pizza we'd eaten. It was really oily, and my tummy didn't feel right. It became the only thing I could think about, asking Jon what he thought this was a sign of and whether I should book in to see the doctor. I knew I needed to get some help so I referred myself to the anxiety and mental health team at the Gloucestershire Royal Hospital the very next day. Just a few months later, I was diagnosed with severe health anxiety aged 27 in 2022. Getting the diagnosis gave me a sense of relief from knowing that there was actually something wrong and I wasn't just being ridiculous. Then I started a six-week course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, which helps people with mental health problems challenge their thinking. The sessions really helped and we explored some of the reasons why I had health anxiety – including how a two-week hospital stay for pneumonia when I was four years old could have contributed. This made a real difference to my mental health. One of the things that helped was writing down my fears and crossing them off when I proved there was nothing to worry about. So when I noticed I had an inverted nipple, and some shoulder pain, I tried to stay calm. I reassured myself that I was young and healthy, and that, only if it persisted, would I get a doctor's appointment. That's how, in June 2024, I ended up in front of my GP on my own, which is something I would have never been able to do before. So my world turned upside down when, a few weeks later I was told there was a 99% chance of me having breast cancer. In the three weeks it took to confirm, I didn't want to leave the house. I read everything there was to know about different types of breast cancer. I'd already lost my aunt to the disease – I thought I was going to die too. I knew I needed more help so I decided to get in touch with the Thirlestaine Breast Centre, who had initially examined me, and who put me straight in touch with a psychiatrist. I tried to protect Jon and my family as I didn't want to worry or upset them but with the psychiatrist, I didn't have to hold anything back. They helped me see things more clearly and put everything into perspective. I needed their support more than ever when I was told I had stage two lobular breast cancer. Further tests revealed it was more aggressive than thought and had spread to several lymph nodes. I'd need to throw everything at it, including chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Within a fortnight, I had to be signed off work due to my mental health and then a few weeks later I had a single mastectomy and nine lymph nodes removed. Georgina Shaw is supporting lobular breast cancer research taking place at the Breast Cancer Now Toby Robins Research Centre at The Institute of Cancer Research, London which is celebrating 25 years of life-changing discoveries. For more information visit Breast Cancer Now here. I also underwent genetic testing, which confirmed that I had a PALB2 gene alteration, which means I'm at greater risk of developing breast cancer. I had been racking my brains as to why I had developed breast cancer and now I had a solid explanation why. I hated going into hospitals and was once physically sick going into one due to my health anxiety. This was a huge problem because I was now faced with daily appointments and check-ups. I had to take a sick bowl with me everywhere. And one consultant even said to me: 'I've never met anyone who brought a sick bowl to an appointment before.' Eventually, I was prescribed a drug called Sertraline, which helps with anxiety. Alongside this, I found socialising and gentle exercise really helpful too. One year later, I've now finished active treatment and have gone from dreading medical appointments to feeling a little lost without them. I've recently started a preventative treatment, as I'm at high risk of my breast cancer coming back. More Trending While the treatment itself helps with some of my anxiety, it's also incredibly reassuring to know that charities like Breast Cancer Now are researching more effective treatments for lobular breast cancer – giving hope to people like me and helping to save more lives. My advice to anyone struggling with health anxiety is talk to a health professional – don't wait to get help. I've needed a lot of help with my mental health and have been to some very dark places over the last year, but having a major disease makes you look at life very differently. View More » I'm now much calmer and able to embrace new experiences without fear – a world away from the panic I felt during that ultrasound. Do you have a story you'd like to share? Get in touch by emailing Share your views in the comments below. MORE: I was 19 when I realised I'm not special – I'm just gay MORE: I want you to speak to me – not the person pushing my wheelchair MORE: I took up running – but family members' responses shocked me Your free newsletter guide to the best London has on offer, from drinks deals to restaurant reviews.
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