Too scared to spa? This Thai retreat will convert you

Times

22-05-2025

'Are you OK with needles? For the IV drip therapy.'
Yes, that's fine.
'Are you OK with heights? For the ziplining.'
Errr, pardon?
'And would you like a colonic?'
Umm …
After my pre-consultation for a wellness retreat at Layan Life at the Anantara Layan Phuket Resort, I had a slight knot in my stomach. I'd never done a wellness retreat before. Day spas in the UK, plenty. But here I'd signed up for a five-night programme that included body analysis, medical consultations and high-end treatments. As I reminded myself: We're not in the hot tub any more, Toto.
Just 30 minutes along the coast from Phuket airport, this Anantara hotel has a mix of accommodation with views of the Andaman Sea, including 30 suites, 46 double pool villas and 15 sprawling pool residences designed for families, all a short golf-buggy ride from the central areas. Located within luxuriant forest, each of the rooms is very private, with modern Thai-style interiors, and lots of spoiling treats, from a giant comfy bed to a huge bath. When I wasn't getting well in the wellness centre, my villa was a beautiful and tranquil place to do absolutely nothing.
The three-to-ten-day packages at its new enormous two-storey Layan Life wellness centre, which opened in late last year, combines future-proofing medical strategies and traditional Thai techniques. Each programme is personalised depending on what you want to achieve — you can learn Thai boxing or improve your mental strength with t'ai chi, or undertake a mindfulness and healthy eating regime.
Once you're inside the centre, clad in light wood and warm neutrals and overseen by the most helpful staff, you can, as I soon learnt, choose your own adventure. Having never done one before, I wanted to start with the basics — a postural analysis and a 3D body scan. A few minutes after posing in front of the camera, I could see my entire body on the screen, alongside a helpful breakdown of my muscle and fat distribution and highlights of the weaknesses in my body. The scan almost immediately showed up a sore shoulder, which had been bothering me for weeks. Straight after, I was sent to talk to Pat, the physio, who gave me an intense massage followed by a one-on-one personal training session to create an exercise regime to strengthen it. It was the fastest diagnosis and treatment I could have asked for.
After a consultation with the doctor, to check my general health, it was time for the IV drip therapy. I was hooked up to the bag full of vitamins and amino acids to help with brain function and chilled out in a comfortable chair overlooking the lush green jungle. I peacefully read the first half of The Old Man and the Sea, chuckling as I imagined what Hemingway would have thought of all this. If he was game, I concluded, he'd have signed up for the hangover drip (their most popular choice). I definitely felt invigorated afterwards.
The most exhilarating experience was the cryotherapy chamber. Having never looked sexier, in football shorts, a mesh bra and fluffy earmuffs, I stepped into the chamber for three minutes at -110C and stepped out, shaking and with blood rushing through my body. Top athletes tend to have this treatment to calm inflammation. I would recommend it to anyone who wants to feel alive. Ziplining was equally life-affirming. Cruising through the trees across the resort was oddly peaceful, rather than daunting — 20 minutes of birdlike bliss as I soared above trees in a harness, enjoying the forests and seascapes around.
Gut health was a prominent theme through the week. The doctors and practitioners talked me through the benefits of eating pre- and pro-biotics for my body. It also cropped up during my visage analysis on how to improve my skin and during my colonic. In the Beach House restaurant there is a specially created gut-healthy menu by the chef Filippo Tawil (who previously worked at Clinic La Prairie) that included fresh, nutritious food that ranged from antioxidant juices to surprisingly healthy lamb koftas. All dishes are free from gluten, dairy and processed sugars and full of high-quality macronutrients. Like everything here, you are given options — and can either choose the super-healthy meals, or indulge in the varied cuisine.
The traditional Thai treatments in my programme came in the form of a rajasamnak massage, an extremely light-touch meditative experience. My imagination ran wild for an hour, with trippy dreams and vivid visions. After my first session of chakra rebalancing, something within me was definitely unlocked. I'm still not entirely sure what happened during this deeply relaxing treatment, but the calming after-effects lingered for days.
Of the resort's six restaurants, Dara Cuisine is the crown jewel. Here, I was treated to a feast of modern Thai dishes, including flavourful curries, and fragrant and fresh fish and spicy veg dishes —followed by an hour of stargazing on the rooftop after dessert. Admiring the cosmos, especially seeing Jupiter up close, was as life-affirming as the spa treatments. Seeing thousands of stars stretching out into inky infinity really does put daily worries into perspective.
I was anxious about admitting to unhealthy lifestyle traits but the staff couldn't have been more generous or more kind — there was no judgment. The focus was looking forward, not backwards, and the changes I could make at home towards a life of self-improvement. I left feeling refreshed and relaxed, with a list filled with advice to take forward.
Although the resort sprawls along the coast, there's room for every guest to be as social or as private as they like. In the evening the rooftop bar has good music and excellent cocktails over which to meet other guests or simply to chill out and watch the sunset. The size of the resort means there are both places to gather — and hide — including a 24-hour gym, studios for daily yoga and Pilates classes, hydrotherapy pools and, of course, the beach. The resort is set on the most beautiful bay, so I spent a large part of my time bobbing around in the sea.
A few weeks on and I'm still dreaming about my trip. I think about gut health when I do the weekly shop, mull over the trippy dreams and what they might signify, and am still doing the exercises Pat taught me. Consider me a convert.
Details Doubles in a Deluxe Pool Villa cost from £499, b&b. A three-night retreat, with ten personalised treatments, group classes and workshops, costs an additional £966, anantara.com