I had my fourth child at 43 & now I'm 51 – people think I had my child too old & I disagree but there IS a cut off point

The Sun

2 days ago

A MUM who welcomed her fourth child at the age of 43 has reignited the debate on how old is too old to have children.
Natalie Heptinstall, 51, from Doncaster, has previously faced criticism for being an older mum, with trolls branding her 'incredibly selfish' and even claiming her child would grow up to be a 'monster'.
Despite the negativity, Natalie continues to advocate for the benefits of being an older parent, sharing her experiences with her followers on TikTok under the handle @ natalie_heptinstall.
Natalie, whose eldest child is 26 and youngest is nearly seven, recently took to her TikTok page to open up about the double standards surrounding older parents.
She questioned why men aren't scrutinised in the same way as women when it comes to having children later in life.
Reflecting on her own journey, Natalie said: 'I had my last child at 43, and it was a really positive experience.
"I'm a huge advocate for speaking positively about the benefits of being an older parent, but I definitely feel there's a cut-off point.'
Recently, Natalie shared her thoughts on Amanda Byram, the former Total Wipeout host, who gave birth to her first child at the age of 51.
Natalie explained that there's "definitely a cut-off point" when it comes to people saying 'Oh, congratulations, good luck,' and others being "horrified and judgemental" for having a baby at specific age.
She also highlighted the disparity in how society views older fathers versus older mothers.
Natalie explained that "nobody bats an eyelid" if a man is 50 plus and having a child, and male celebrities who father children in their later year are "rarely questioned."
She added: 'Meanwhile, with Amanda, the entire article focused on her age, and her husband's age wasn't even mentioned.'
I have a 3-year-old & I don't think kids are worth it - trolls call me a 'bad mum' but I want to warn other women
Natalie expressed frustration at the lack of progress in attitudes towards older mothers, asking her followers, 'How old is too old to have a child? What are your thoughts?'
In the caption section, Natalie she also explained that she is a "huge advocate" for speaking positively about the benefits of being an older parent, but she " definitely feels there's a cut-off point."
Natalie's TikTok video went viral within 24 hours gaining one million views and 3,483 comments.
It sparked a range of responses, with many rushing to share their thoughts and start a debate.
One wrote: "It's not fair on the child having an old parent."
While a second added: "I personally don't think it's fair on a child."
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But someone else said: "My mum had me at 32.
"I remember how embarrassed I used be that my mum was much older than the other mums.
"She must only been 40 at the time but to me it was old."
However, another added: "I find some comments awful, you could have a child at 25 and die at 28, or have one at 49 and live until your 90... life isn't guaranteed."
And one TikToker said: "A friend of mine passed away age 29, leaving a child behind. You can die at any time.
"It is usual for a woman in the UK to die in her eighties now, so a 51-year-old baby should be an adult when they pass."
Here's why I love being a young mum
Tracy Kiss, who fell pregnant at 19, has revealed what she believes are the pros of being a young mother.
The personal trainer and blogger, from Buckinghamshire, believes women who give birth in their teens make BETTER mothers than those in their 30s.
She claims young mums snap back into shape quicker, have more energy and relate more easily to their children, meaning they're better behaved and happier.
Tracy told Fabulous: "Women who become first-time mums in their teens make better parents than those in their 30s or 40s.
"I believe if I'd been 10 or so years older before becoming a mother then I wouldn't have the relationship I have with my children now.
"For a start, being older I would have had less energy and therefore less patience.
"I wouldn't be as enthusiastic to speak to people after months of sleepless nights as I was in my teens.
"My body snapped back to its pre-pregnancy size through fitness post-birth, which in turn gave me the confidence to date and find love again. I've never been happier than I am now at the age of 30 with two children.
"If I'd have been alone at 40 with a newborn baby I'd be more tired, less happy with my body, less energetic and far more stressed from the shock of living my life for myself instead of putting others first. Sometimes age and the innocence of ignorance is a good thing.
"As a teen mum I just got on with it, found my feet and became responsible and capable because at the time I didn't know any different."