How a dowry death case in Pune has led to code for simple weddings in Maratha community

Hindustan Times

2 days ago

In the wake of Vaishnavi Hagawane's suicide, allegedly driven by demands of dowry by her marital family, members of the Maratha community converged at Ahilyanagar on Sunday to introspect and draw up a code of conduct to curb extravagant weddings, in the hope that such a societal pressure might help curb harassment of women.
The meeting was chaired by Haribhakt Parayan Badrinath Maharaj Tanpure, a kirtankar of the Warkari tradition who belongs to a family of preachers known to advocate social equality. Over time he has earned recognition and lakhs of followers, and is known as a socially conscious kirtankar of the Warkari tradition, thanks to his progressive ideology.
On May 19, after 23-year-old Vaishnavi was found dead at her marital home in Bavdhan, Pune, her father, Anil Kaspate, in an FIR filed at Bavdhan police station alleged that at her in-laws were pressuring them for a Toyota Fortuner, after the family had given them gifts in gold and silver. Vaishnavi's suicide created such a storm that her father-in-law, Rajendra Hagawane, an NCP leader, was expelled from the party, following which police arrested multiple members of the family, including Hagawane and Vaishnavi's husband, Shashank.
Both the Hagawanes and Kaspates are Marathas.
At the meeting in Ahilyanagar, participants condemned the dowry system and proposed an 11-point wedding code of conduct. Among the resolutions were: avoiding lavish weddings with no pre-wedding shoots, limiting the guest list to 100-200 people and using traditional musicians instead of DJs. Crucially, the community resolved to boycott weddings where pre-wedding photo or video shoots are displayed during ceremonies.
'Dowry must be avoided and the money should instead be kept as a fixed deposit in the girl's name,' the participants suggested. B Dhumal, an author and entrepreneur, who participated in the meeting, said: 'This incident has awakened the entire community. We deliberated over the issue and came up with suggestions. After compiling them, we have drawn up a code of conduct for weddings in the community.'
Others who participated in the meeting include NCP MLA Chetan Tupe, former mayors of Pune Ankush Kakde and Rajlaxmi Bhosale, former corporator Shrikant Shirole, and Maratha activist Rajendra Kondhare.
Shirole said, 'Middle class families often emulate the rich and get trapped in loans and thereby incur stress.' Bhosale added, 'Daughters-in-law must know that they will be supported by their families if they are harassed.'
Members of the committee have now decided to visit different localities to spread awareness, 'as the community needs to adopt change on its own,' said Tanpure.
But will the community follow a code that lacks legal backing? 'A large part of the community is not economically well off – for them this code will be convenient. As for the rich, if the poor decide not to support them, they will have to fall in line eventually,' said Dhumal.
Sakal Maratha Samaj convenor Chandrakant Gade Patil, also a participant of the meeting, added, 'It is possible to hold weddings on a small scale once social pressure builds. During COVID-19, many did it successfully.'
Marathas comprise over 30 per cent of the state's population. The community is also politically active with most public representatives including MLAs and MPs emerging from here. Over the past few years, the economically influential and politically connected community members have seen organising big fat weddings, attended by thousands.
Earlier, on May 26, prominent Maratha families and political leaders convened in Pune to express concern over the culture of extravagant weddings, especially when coupled with demands for dowry. Reflecting on the way forward, Pune Congress chief Arvind Shinde said, 'The community has resolved to socially boycott families who harass their daughters-in-law. No one will marry into such families.' It now remains to be seen if this momentum for reform will sustain.