
Singaporean mum admits feeling unfulfilled despite having a 'family, a house, a car, and a stable job'
SINGAPORE: A Singaporean mum recently shared a raw and honest post on social media, saying that even though she has everything she once wished for—a family, a house, a car, and a stable job—she still feels like something is missing deep down. 'My heart and mind still feel unsatisfied,' she admitted.
In a post titled 'Drowning in the Depths: What to Do?', she opened up about the emotional challenges of being a working parent and how this has greatly affected her marriage.
'My relationship with my hubby has deteriorated after having my kid. Most of the time, it feels like we are roommates. Also, his capacity for engagement seems to have gone from bad to worse,' she wrote.
'Like he wasn't the best conversationalist before this, but now it's like there's barely any effort apart from the daily routine conversations. He's a hands-on dad, I guess, but I'm still the one who carries most of the mental load.'
The woman also revealed how motherhood has impacted her social life. 'I feel like I have no friends. Even calling to chat or replying to messages seems to take a lot of effort. Whereas I see many others out there having huge gatherings every week. Why is it only me who lost everyone?'
She went on to share that they hired a domestic helper to ease the burden at home. However, the arrangement has not been as helpful as she had hoped, as the helper frequently complains about aches, pains, and personal issues, and appears reluctant to take on anything beyond her core duties.
'It's a nuisance. I really, really wish I could somehow make do without one, but it seems impossible for now,' she wrote.
'There are several other things that bother me, but it seems like I should just accept it. The only time I don't feel like I'm drowning in the depths is when I'm with my kid, who's literally the light of my life, and perhaps when I'm at work because I'm too busy and distracted to feel anything,' she added. 'You need to talk to your husband about this…'
In the comments, many Singaporean Redditors encouraged the mum to tackle things one step at a time. See also Grace Chan is head over heels with Kevin Cheng's looks
Some felt that mending her relationship with her husband could be a good starting point. One Redditor advised, 'Share your thoughts with your husband, but craft the messaging well, such as telling him how you miss the time you had with him alone, being able to converse with him, and share everything under the sun with him.'
Another agreed, adding, 'You need to talk to your husband about this; it won't be easy, and it won't be fast, but you will both need to be willing and able to address it.'
Others turned their attention to her home situation, suggesting that she address the ongoing tension with her helper. 'Talk to your helper; if she's not happy, change her out. You don't have to deal with substandard service when you're paying for it.'
Another shared, 'Feel like we are quite similar in terms of life phase. Except maybe I have two kids now. My helper usually doesn't give problems…if yours is not helping, I might take a leap and suggest you consider replacing her.'
In other news, a woman shared on social media that her former boss has been spreading false claims about her after she resigned from a company she believed she had left on good terms.
In a detailed post on the r/askSingapore subreddit, the woman explained that she left her job at the end of 2024, having served the standard one-month notice period. At the time of her departure, there were no signs of conflict or tension, and she assumed everything had ended on amicable terms.
However, weeks after her departure, troubling rumours began to reach her through former colleagues and people in her professional network.
Read more: 'My ex-boss is spreading lies about me' — Woman says her former boss is falsely claiming she 'mismanaged' the company, so he fired her, despite a peaceful resignation
Featured image by Depositphotos (for illustration purposes only)
Hashtags

Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles


Independent Singapore
an hour ago
- Independent Singapore
Singapore's women's 4×100-m relay team breaks national record at Asian Championships
SOUTH KOREA: As the baton crossed the finish line at the Gumi Sports Complex, the Singapore women's 4×100-m relay team looked up at the scoreboard. The time read 44.66 seconds, a new national record. It wasn't enough for a medal at the Asian Athletics Championships, but it was enough to rewrite history. The team of Shannon Tan, Elizabeth-Ann Tan, Shanti Pereira, and Laavinia Jaiganth finished fifth overall, behind Asia's sprint powerhouses, but in the context of Singapore athletics, it marked a major breakthrough. The previous record of 44.96 seconds, set at the 2017 SEA Games, had stood for nearly eight years. That timing had only just been matched a month earlier at the Singapore Open, on home soil and with a different lead-off runner. This time, the first athlete out of the blocks was Shannon Tan, a Secondary 4 student from Cedar Girls' School. Making her debut for the national team at just 16, she became the youngest sprinter in recent memory to front a senior relay squad at a continental meet. She passed the baton cleanly to Elizabeth-Ann Tan, one of Singapore's two fastest female sprinters. Shanti Pereira, the other, ran the curve on the third leg. Having just returned from overseas competitions, she delivered one of the race's strongest splits, powering through the second bend to position the team well going into the final changeover. Laavinia Jaiganth, the national U20 400-m record holder, anchored the team. She held her ground in a stacked field to bring Singapore home in record time. Also travelling with the relay squad were Kerstin Ong and Sarah Poh, who had been part of the pool preparing for the event. Behind the scenes, the effort was supported by relay coaches Hamkah Afik, Khairyll Amri, Melvin Tan, and Remy Gan. Their respective personal coaches also train each of the four runners: Margaret Oh (Shannon), Hamkah and Khairyll (Elizabeth-Ann), Luis Cunha (Shanti), and Fabian William (Laavinia). The new national time of 44.66 s would have won medals at 30 out of 31 SEA Games editions where the women's 4×100 m relay was contested. Still, more than just the numbers, the race reflected a shift: the blend of experience and emerging talent, and a baton literally and figuratively being passed from one generation to the next. As the athletes left the track in Gumi, the message was clear — the standard has been raised.


CNA
2 hours ago
- CNA
Man charged with murder of 79-year-old woman in Sengkang
SINGAPORE: A 44-year-old man was on Tuesday (Jun 3) charged with the murder of a 79-year-old woman in Sengkang. Lim Yuen Li was handed one count of murder – which carries the death penalty – at the State Courts. Appearing in person, Lim requested to use his mobile phone to make calls and deal with some administrative or financial matters. He told the court that he wanted to apply for a state lawyer and that he wanted to attend the woman's funeral. Lim was ordered to be remanded for psychiatric assessment at the prosecution's application. In a press release on Monday, the police said they received a call for assistance at a residential unit along Fernvale Road at about 11.50am. When the police arrived at the scene, they found the woman lying motionless inside the unit. She was subsequently pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics. Lim was arrested at the scene with preliminary investigations revealing that the two had known each other. He will next appear in court on Jun 24.


CNA
2 hours ago
- CNA
Beach Road chopper attack: Man jailed 19 years, caned for attempted murder of wife
SINGAPORE: The man who hacked his wife with a chopper outside a Beach Road restaurant in 2022 was sentenced to 19 years in jail and eight strokes of the cane on Tuesday (Jun 3). Cheng Guoyuan, 49, previously pleaded guilty to a single charge of attempted murder. This carries a maximum punishment of life imprisonment with caning. Justice Audrey Lim also took into consideration two charges of intimidating bystanders with the chopper when sentencing him. She agreed with the prosecution that Cheng's attack on his wife was premeditated and committed out of malice. However, she found that it did not fall within the worst type of such cases, and hence did not warrant the maximum sentence. Cheng, who followed proceedings through a Mandarin interpreter, kept his head bowed as the judge read out her decision. Videos of the brutal attack on Apr 14, 2022 were circulated widely online. Multiple bystanders had tried to fend Cheng off by throwing things or holding him off with a ladder. The victim, 44-year-old Han Hongli, suffered severe blood loss and took 1.5 years to recover and adjust to her life-threatening injuries. These included deep lacerations across her body, open fractures and amputation of her ring finger. She no longer has sight in her left eye, has a permanently disfigured face and her arms are permanently partially impaired. Deputy Public Prosecutors Ng Jun Chong and Koh Yi Wen had urged the court to jail Cheng for life and impose eight to 12 strokes of the cane. Cheng's lawyers Johannes Hadi and Wei Ziqiang, who were appointed pro bono, had argued for 15 years' jail and five strokes of the cane. MOTIVATED BY VENGEANCE Cheng was likely motivated by vengeance, according to his psychiatric assessment at the Institute of Mental Health. Cheng and Ms Han, both Chinese nationals, were married in 2009. Ms Han has a daughter from a previous marriage and a son with Cheng. Ms Han came to Singapore to work in 2016 and would remit money home. The couple's relationship became strained over time, and Cheng felt Ms Han looked down on him for earning less than her. Sometime in April 2021, Ms Han discovered that Cheng had done something wrong to her daughter. The wrongdoing was not revealed in court. When Ms Han confronted Cheng about it, he admitted to the wrongdoing but felt that it would not affect Ms Han's daughter. He also pleaded with his wife not to report it to the police and promised to compensate the daughter. Ms Han eventually agreed for Cheng to pay the daughter 40,000 yuan (US$5,552) as compensation, but their relationship worsened. Cheng managed to borrow the money but subsequently fell into financial difficulty. By then, Ms Han had stopped remitting money to Cheng, in part because she was not able to work due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Cheng "believed that his reputation and his family's reputation were more important than his life, and would rather die than 'losing (his) face'", prosecutors said. He sought assurance from Ms Han that she would not tell his relatives and friends about his wrongdoing, and kept asking her to let the matter rest. He also asked her not to divorce him. In September 2021, Cheng came to Singapore to work as a cleaner. Ms Han did not know he was in Singapore, and was shocked when he turned up at her workplace in November that year. Later that month, Cheng threatened to kill Ms Han and not let her live in peace if she did not reconcile with him. Ms Han reported these threats on Nov 28, 2021, and police investigated Cheng and warned him not to look for her. Cheng returned to China in January 2022. In April that year, he found work at a restaurant and returned to Singapore, again without informing his wife. ATTEMPTED MURDER On Apr 12, 2022, Cheng "concluded that he might end up with nothing if the victim were to reveal the wrongdoing to anyone", said prosecutors. "He was angry with the victim as she refused to forgive him for the wrongdoing even though he loved her and felt that she had done things which let him down," they said. Cheng also hated that the victim "had control over his future". To settle the matter, Cheng came up with a plan to kill his wife if she refused to confirm that she would not reveal the wrongdoing. He went to the Beach Road restaurant where she worked, but returned to his dormitory when he could not find her. The next day, he took a cleaver to the restaurant again and saw her from afar, but did not attack her. On Apr 14, 2022, Cheng did not go to work. At about 5.20pm that day, he went to the restaurant where Ms Han worked. She was shocked to see him, and asked him to go to a back lane where they could speak. Based on Ms Han's attitude and responses, Cheng felt that she "could not be trusted to keep the wrongdoing a secret, and that she might reveal it to the Chinese police and his relatives", prosecutors said. "He became very angry as he felt that she was not going to give him a chance even though he had already compensated their daughter for the wrongdoing," they added. Pulling out the cleaver from his bag, he told her: "If I am not living well, you should not think about living." He repeatedly slashed her with the chopper, chasing her when she tried to escape and pursuing her despite bystanders attempting to intervene. Cheng was finally subdued after police arrived and fired a Taser at him. He later admitted to attacking his wife out of anger. He knew it was wrong to try to kill her, but did not want her to risk exposing his wrongdoing. According to a psychiatric assessment in 2022, Cheng would need to be closely monitored in prison, as he was at risk of developing an adjustment disorder due to his concerns about receiving a severe penalty.