Mom Enjoys Child-Free Trip, Has Realization About Daughter—'Not My Purpose'

Newsweek

14 hours ago

Based on facts, either observed and verified firsthand by the reporter, or reported and verified from knowledgeable sources.
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A mom who left her 4-month-old daughter behind for a few nights braced herself for the guilt.
Natasha Bardin-Patel and her husband boarded a flight to Mexico for what they called a "parentmoon"—a deliberate pause to reflect on the seismic shift into parenthood and to reconnect as a couple.
Natasha had been warned by other moms to expect tears at the airport, endless photo-scrolling and an ache that wouldn't fade until she returned home. But it never came.
Split view of the mom holds her baby on a dock with an open water backdrop (left) and the waters skirted by trees (right).
Split view of the mom holds her baby on a dock with an open water backdrop (left) and the waters skirted by trees (right).
@tashilouu
"I didn't cry at the airport. I didn't ache with guilt. I didn't countdown the hours," the 29-year-old shared in a reel on Instagram (@tashilouu). "She's not my shadow, not my purpose, not my entire identity," Natasha told Newsweek.
"At times, I even forgot I was a mom—and I've never heard anyone say that out loud," she added.
"In those early months, it's easy to get swallowed by the feeding schedules, sleep deprivation, and emotional intensity, and we wanted to be intentional about making time just for us," Natasha said.
She expected to feel crushed by separation from her daughter, but the reality was far different.
"Of course, we spoke about her, but it wasn't obsessive," Natasha said. "It was more like deep, reflective conversations about the kind of life we want to build for her.
"I soaked in the quiet, had margaritas with my husband, rested on the beach and came home recharged, ready to love her even more. That reunion was beautiful."
Her reel was inspired by a gap she noticed in online motherhood narratives. "I had never heard other moms talk about feeling OK to leave their baby … or the guilt over not feeling guilty as everyone around us suggests we should," Natasha said.
"There's a warped idea that guilt is proof of love. I think it's outdated," she added.
The reel has been viewed more than 159,000 times and received support from other moms in the comments.
"Honestly needed this reel badly," one user wrote.
"Finally someone said it," another posted.
While a few critics labeled her a "terrible mom," Natasha said she feels compassion rather than anger.
"A few messaged to say they feel the complete opposite; they miss their baby even when they go for a glass of water, and I respect that so much," she said. "Every experience is valid."
For Natasha, the takeaway is simple: "I firmly believe that I'm not failing her by choosing myself sometimes. I'm showing her how to one day choose herself too."