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The Goofus in Charge of HBO Max Is Out of Ideas—and It's a Crisis for American Culture

The Goofus in Charge of HBO Max Is Out of Ideas—and It's a Crisis for American Culture

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This weekend seemed like a good one for Warner Bros. Discovery. Having secured national broadcasting rights for Good Night, and Good Luck—the megahit Broadway play adapted from George Clooney's 2005 film—the entertainment giant scheduled a much-anticipated, widely accessible livestream of the show's penultimate performance on Saturday night. Interested audiences could catch it on CNN's cable broadcast, stream it via HBO Max (fka Max, fka HBO Max), or, if they subscribed to neither service, view it for free on CNN's website. Making history as the first Broadway play to ever get a live telecast on American TV, Good Night, and Good Luck reintroduced the righteous saga of Edward R. Murrow's battle against McCarthyism at a timely moment—and transmitted the story through both traditional and digital means, crystallizing the corporate synergy between the Cable News Network and its name-shifting digital counterpart, (HBO) Max, with the express approval of Warner Bros. Discovery CEO David Zaslav.
Or so it seemed. On Monday, Zaslav and WBD CFO Gunnar Wiedenfels announced to investors that CNN and HBO would no longer operate under the same parent. The whole dealmaking process that fused WarnerMedia with Discovery Inc. just three years ago and brought their intellectual property under Zaslav's watch has been effectively nullified, as WBD will be split back into two separate companies by summer 2026. The first company, to be known as Streaming & Studios and headed by Zaslav, will consist of Warner Bros.' film and television properties, HBO's TV and streaming services, and the DC Studios library. The second, to be known as Global Networks and headed by Wiedenfels, will take over the company's cable assets, including Discovery, CNN, Turner Classic Movies, Animal Planet, TLC, Food Network, TBS, TNT Sports, Bleacher Report, U.S. broadcast rights for sports like NCAA basketball, and various European channels. It'll also assume a heaping stack of corporate debt worth tens of billions of dollars.
Coupled with the HBO Max reversion that occurred just last month, the redivision of WBD might be yet another obvious indication that Zaslav should probably not have custody of so much American cultural history. Zaslav had been CEO of Discovery Communications for 16 years before the merger with WarnerMedia closed in 2022. Now, however, he's given up everything from Discovery, just two years after his HBO Max–to–Max rebranding set the stage for HBO and Discovery properties to exist together online. After admitting last month that maybe that wasn't the best idea, David Zaslav is just dumping Discovery wholesale and nabbing the prestigious divisions for himself.
That's not the only fishy part. After the 2024 presidential election, Zaslav expressed some unsubtle optimism that a second Donald Trump presidency would allow a more favorable business environment for media-industry deals—like the potential WBD merger with Paramount he'd explored in 2023. But then the economic uncertainty engendered by the Trump 2.0 tariff chaos got to him, not least because so much WBD revenue stems from movie releases in China, and Zaslav began trimming employee perks as a result. Now he's even un-consolidating his media empire, instead of consolidating further—likely so he can hoard the company's current and future moneymakers as a bulwark against economic headwinds, and also no longer worry about the debt accrued during the $43 billion acquisition, whose payback installments are still subject to those high interest rates. It's only been a few months into this Trump term.
As I noted late last year, Zaslav had already spent much of his 2024 chipping away at the Warner Bros. Discovery portfolio. Beyond purging classic titles like Looney Tunes from the HBO Max corpus (and then taking advantage of the tax write-offs), the WBD executive suite started selling off many of its international cable channels and canceling ongoing arrangements with institutions like Sesame Street. On top of that, Zaslav demonstrated his explicit contempt for one of WBD's most pricey, yet valuable, advantages: domestic rights for NBA broadcasts via TNT. First he claimed WBD didn't need the NBA, then got pissed and sued the league when it understandably turned to Amazon for future broadcast rights. The fallout: a November settlement that allowed TNT Sports and Bleacher Report to broadcast games in certain international markets, but no more rights to televise live games in the United States. (The NBA's new deal gives those rights to Disney, Comcast, and Amazon for the next 10 years.)
A lot of notable people got pissed off along the way, including NBA commissioner Adam Silver and TNT panelist Charles Barkley, both of whom likely noticed that Zaslav is a frequent courtside attendee at Knicks games. But now, looking at the proposed split-up, it's clear Zaslav has nothing but contempt for the sporting world that, for now, remains one of traditional TV's last solid revenue sources. (Zaslav's excuse is that sports apparently don't drive HBO Max subscriptions; I'm less convinced that that's why some customers may be avoiding Max.) All the athletics are now Gunnar Wiedenfels' problem at Global Networks, along with the cable channels and (most) of the monetary debt accrued during the 2022 merger and Zaslav's subsequent rule. Surging viewership for March Madness might be able to help Wiedenfels out there, but he'll no longer have domestic NBA live games as his major trump card for other negotiations. And he's ended up with one of Zaslav's more politically inconvenient offerings: CNN, aka President Donald Trump's least favorite news channel. Zaslav might have agreed to spread the pro-freedom-of-the-press message of Good Night, and Good Luck on George Clooney's behalf—but he probably didn't want to deal with the Trump administration's relentless persecution of news outlets that the president deems 'very unfair' to him. Especially when, as in Paramount's case, that may interfere with the broader company's ability to make deals.
The thing is, WBD's move doesn't run counter to broader entertainment trends. Last year saw Paramount shut down and lay off staffers from its in-house TV studio, while devaluing the worth of its cable offerings by billions of dollars. (Just this week, the embattled studio axed another 3.5 percent of its American workforce following an executive shakeup.) Comcast spun off the bulk of its traditional TV assets—minus Bravo and Telemundo and the core NBC brand—into a 'SpinCo' firm (now known as Versant), while pointedly keeping its streaming and cinema ventures, Peacock and Universal, inside the house.
So Zaslav has a more focused media group via Streaming & Studios, but leaving HBO Max in his hands will inevitably winnow down its once rich library even further. (Zaslav himself has admitted that the TV networks he's spinning off collectively make for a quarter of HBO Max viewership.) The future of Warner Bros.' film-and-TV biz is even less certain. To his credit, Zaslav did what other studios wouldn't and bid for Ryan Coogler's Sinners in spite of the director's controversial film-ownership demands, ultimately giving Warner Bros. the highest-grossing non-IP movie of the decade thus far. (Perhaps a suitable complement to the actual second-highest-grossing flick of the year, the WBD video game adaptation known as A Minecraft Movie.) But much of his time has been defined by completed movies that get axed prior to release, the halfhearted releases of new projects from veterans like Clint Eastwood, the typical overreliance on IP that Zaslav has made clear will continue, and the arbitrary favors called in for personal friends—like Nicholas Pileggi, the Goodfellas-inspiring author whose latest Zaslav-approved film, The Alto Knights, bombed pretty drastically.
So maybe Zaslav thinks he'll get the haters and the feds off his back by offloading his news and sports holdings, along with his cable-channel stack, and granting them all to 'Global Networks' along with a hefty helping of debt. But the entire saga of his WBD takeover, his decisions and backtracks, and now, finally, the unwinding of the media megamerger he was supposed to build up even further—there's no reason to believe he'll do any better in the future. The guy is all out of ideas, and it's American culture that has suffered for it. Good night, and good luck, to all of us.

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Beach Boys 'heartbroken' by Brian Wilson's death
Beach Boys 'heartbroken' by Brian Wilson's death

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time28 minutes ago

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Beach Boys 'heartbroken' by Brian Wilson's death

The Beach Boys have been left "heartbroken" by Brian Wilson's death. The Good Vibrations group's co-founder and singer passed away on Wednesday (11.06.25) at the age of 82, and the current members of the band - Mike Love, Al Jardine, and Bruce Johnston - have paid tribute to the "genius" and the huge impact his work had on the music world. A post on the Brach Boys' Instagram account, which featured an archive picture of Brian, read: "The world mourns a genius today, and we grieve for the loss of our cousin, our friend, and our partner in a great musical adventure. "Brian Wilson wasn't just the heart of The Beach Boys—he was the soul of our sound. "The melodies he dreamed up and the emotions he poured into every note changed the course of music forever. His unparalleled talent and unique spirit created the soundtrack of so many lives around the globe, including our own. "Together, we gave the world the American dream of optimism, joy, and a sense of freedom—music that made people feel good, made them believe in summer and endless possibilities. "We are heartbroken by his passing. We will continue to cherish the timeless music we made together and the joy he brought to millions over the decades. "And while we will miss him deeply, his legacy will live on through his songs and in our memories. Our hearts go out to Brian's family and his loved ones during this difficult time." Rhythm guitarist Al also paid a separate tribute to his old school friend and admited he took comfort in knowing Brian had been "reunited" with his late brothers and bandmates Carl and Dennis Wilson. He wrote alongside a picture of them together: "Brian Wilson, my friend, my classmate, my football teammate, my Beach Boy bandmate and my brother in spirit, I will always feel blessed that you were in our lives for as long as you were. "I think the most comforting thought right now is that you are reunited with Carl and Dennis, singing those beautiful harmonies again. "You were a humble giant who always made me laugh and we will celebrate your music forever. Brian, I'll really miss you…still I have the warmth of the sun." Meanwhile, John Stamos, who has often toured with The Beach Boys and has been performing with them on their 2025 Sounds of Summer tour also hailed Brian a "genius" and was thrilled to call him a friend. He wrote on Instagram: "Brian Wilson didn't just soundtrack my life…he filled it with color, with wonder, with some of the most unforgettable, emotional, joyful moments I've ever known. "It's hard to put into words what it meant to stand beside him, laugh with him, play his music with him. Brian wasn't just a musical genius, he was a gentle, soulful, funny, complex, beautiful man. He heard things no one else could hear. He felt things deeper than most of us ever will. And somehow, he turned all of that into music that wrapped itself around the world and made us all feel less alone. "I grew up worshipping the Beach Boys, never imagining one day I'd get to play with them, let alone call Brian a friend. "Brian gave the world Pet Sounds, God Only Knows, and Wouldn't It Be Nice. Songs that didn't just play in the background of our lives, they shaped who we were. They shaped who I became. His music made me feel things I didn't know how to say. It made me want to make people feel the way his music made me feel. So much of my life and career, so much of me, exists because of what Brian created." The 'Full House' star went on to pay tribute to Brian's family, including ex-wife Marilyn Wilson-Rutherford and their children Carnie, 57, and Wendy, 55, as well as his cousin and bandmate Mike. He concluded: "To Carnie, Wendy, the lovely Marilyn, to everyone who loved him, and especially to Mike. My heart is with you. Brian once said, 'Music is God's voice.' I believe he was right, and now that voice, his voice, is part of the divine chorus. The music didn't end. "Rest easy, Brian. Thank you for the music. Thank you for the moments. I'll carry them with me -forever. Love, Stamos."

How ‘American Primeval,' ‘Daredevil' and ‘The Last of Us' Pulled Off Some of the Year's Biggest Stunt-Filled Action Set Pieces
How ‘American Primeval,' ‘Daredevil' and ‘The Last of Us' Pulled Off Some of the Year's Biggest Stunt-Filled Action Set Pieces

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How ‘American Primeval,' ‘Daredevil' and ‘The Last of Us' Pulled Off Some of the Year's Biggest Stunt-Filled Action Set Pieces

The year is 1857. A woman is sitting in a meadow in southern Utah Territory, casually explaining her plans to settle in the Salt Lake Valley, when she's cut off mid-sentence by a pointed object that bursts from her forehead with a bone-cracking crunch. She remains upright for a moment — silent, eyes open and blood oozing from her wound — then falls over dead, revealing the long shaft of an arrow lodged in the back of her skull. The next two-plus-minutes of Netflix's 'American Primeval' are a dizzying display of nonstop mayhem. The sky is instantly filled with flying arrows, falling victims right and left, as attackers on horseback and on foot zoom in and out frame, shooting, stabbing, scalping and engaging in hand-to-hand combat. The camera snakes through the action, capturing a succession of brutal deaths (including the shooting of a minor character played by director Peter Berg), always circling back to Sara Rowell (Betty Gilpin) and her pre-teen son Devin's (Preston Mota) desperate efforts to stay alive. More from Variety How Meghann Fahy Created a Rebellious Character Whose 'Disdain' for Flowery Dresses Disrupted the Wealthy World of 'Sirens' Ramy Youssef on Juggling 'Mountainhead,' '#1 Happy Family USA,' 'Mo,' 'The Studio' and Perhaps - Eventually - a Baby 'Bridget Jones' Director Michael Morris on the Emmy Longform Conundrum: What's The Difference Between a Film and a TV Movie? 'The script read for 100 people on each side, and we got 15 [stunt people] on each side,' says second unit director and stunt coordinator J.J. Dashnaw, who worked on the show alongside his father, fellow stunt coordinator Jeff Dashnaw. 'We had guys running around dying, and when the camera tilted one way, [they'd] get up and play other people.' There were several other Dashnaws on the stunt team, including J.J.'s son Jaxon, who plays a boy taken down by a bullet to the head, causing his guilt-wracked killer to vomit. 'I actually walked away, because I got emotional as a proud father,' says J.J. 'It was a cool moment for me.' 'American Primeval' is one of many examples of Emmy-eligible shows that have upped TV's action game, from Amazon's 'The Boys' and 'Reacher' to HBO Max's 'House of the Dragon' and 'The Penguin,' putting themselves in contention in the stunt coordination and stunt performer categories. The raid in 'American Primeval,' based on a real-life incident known as the Mountain Meadows Massacre, was done as a 'oner,' a term used to describe a scene shot — or seemingly shot — in a single take. In recent years, it has become an increasingly common attention-grabbing aesthetic device employed across genres. The raid scene was filmed in New Mexico at dusk over the course of three days, then seamlessly stitched together digitally in post. Aside from CG flying arrows and a CG charging bull, everything else was done practically, from the fires burning the wagons to the gunshots, the bullet hits and the fake blood. In the first episode of Disney+'s 'Daredevil: Born Again,' the big 'oner' starts with the stunt doubles for the titular blind superhero (Charlie Cox) and the villain Bullseye (Wilson Bethel) smashing through the front window of Josie's Bar. As patrons scatter, Daredevil and Bullseye trade punches and kicks, eventually moving out of frame. The camera travels outside, where Foggy Nelson (Elden Henson) lays on the ground, mortally wounded, then back into the bar, following Daredevil and Bullseye's fight up the back staircase and on to the roof. '[Showrunner] Dario Scardapane really knows how to flesh out and write a sequence that leaves it open for you to creatively jump into it and design characters, but he's also very specific at the same time,' says second unit director and stunt coordinator Philip Silvera. And directors Justin Benson and Aaron Moorhead 'had a very specific camera language to which they wanted to shoot the sequence. So it's my job to kind of figure out how to make that flow within the camera language and the character design.' The 'oner' was assembled from several shots taken over the course of two and a half days. The bar and the staircase were filmed on location at the Capri Social Club in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, while the rooftop portion was done on a soundstage at Silvercup Studios East in Long Island City, N.Y. The shots bookending the sequence are equally spectacular. 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'The problem with an air bag, when there's a two-person entry into it, if one hits first, the other one potentially doesn't get any air,' explains stunt coordinator Marny Eng. Cardboard boxes notwithstanding, the sequence was a highly complex, high-tech undertaking. Shot over the course of four weeks on a set built in a gravel pit in Minaty Bay, British Columbia, it mixes practical effects (including fire and snow), makeups and stunts (both human and canine) with an array of CG elements, which, unlike in 'American Primeval,' included digitally animated characters. 'The plan that I had with Marny is that if we have 50 stunt performers that day, where do we put them that is most advantageous for visual effects, understanding that we had to add more to that number?' says visual effects supervisor Alex Wang. 'Fifty had to turn into 200, for example, for some shots.' When the infected horde is running down Main Street to attack the town, the first unit (under the direction of Mark Mylod) and the second unit team worked in tandem, with the former on the rooftops with lead actors and the latter on the ground with the 'infected' stunt performers. 'That really happened in real time with everybody, where you see Maria [Rutina Wesley] up on the roof and Tommy [Gabriel Luna] down below, and the guys with the flamethrowers,' says cinematographer Catherine Goldschmidt. Camera operator Robin A. Smith got into the act as a stunt performer of sorts to capture the subjective perspective of a seven-foot-tall 'bloater' — a human with a late-stage fungal infection that has turned them into a mushroom-scaled monstrosity — in a one-on-one showdown with a flamethrower-wielding Tommy. 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Working out without working hard
Working out without working hard

Business Insider

timean hour ago

  • Business Insider

Working out without working hard

Every generation has its own version of the vibrating belt machine — the '50s-era contraption that promised to literally shake housewives into shape with minimal effort (and effect). This perpetual fitness obsession is why, on a recent Friday in June, I found myself strapped into the 2025 iteration: an electro-muscle stimulation suit. For 15 minutes, sporting an outfit that had me looking like a cross between Uma Thurman in "Kill Bill" and a Transformer, I lunged, squatted, and pressed around a compact, chic-ish space as the getup intermittently sent little electrical impulses through my body. At first, I cackled as the EMS suit gripped and vibrated me every few seconds as I attempted to move. By the end, I came to dread the waves — it felt like a shock collar people put on dogs to stop them from breaking out of the yard. Despite my discomfort, the premise of the whole thing was enticing: EMS suits supposedly give you the same results in 25 minutes as you would get from working out for four hours, at least according to the fitness studios that market them. The quest to work out without actually doing much work is eternal. We know that exercise has all sorts of benefits. It's good for our hearts, our muscles, our minds. It increases energy, helps us live longer, and prevents disease. In a society that glorifies fit bodies, exercise can help keep things aesthetically in check. The problem is that exercise isn't always the most fun endeavor, at least by many people's estimations. So we find ourselves looking for shortcuts to reap the muscular rewards for a fraction of the sweat equity. Companies are happy to oblige, offering up all sorts of quick fixes. Whether much of this works, fitness-wise, is doubtful, but psychologically, the ploys are effective. "Our capitalistic culture of fitness has really morphed into sellable life hacks, and the process has become transactional for many," says Sam Zizzi, a professor who focuses on sport and exercise physiology at West Virginia University. He compares these various fitness shortcuts to a lottery ticket. You know chances are slim to none that you'll get the winning Powerball ticket, but you buy one anyway just in case. Who doesn't want to hack their way to health, especially in an era of extreme instant gratification — and Ozempic? American fitness culture is intertwined with the American idea of individualism: You pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and success depends on individual commitment and will. An equally powerful American tradition is the desire to have something for nothing, explains Natalia Mehlman Petrzela, a history professor at The New School who's the author of "Fit Nation: The Gains and Pains of America's Exercise Obsession." We want to believe that there's a magical product right around the corner that will grant us miraculous results with only a small bit of input on our part. "Both of these ideas are equally powerful in making American fitness culture so long-standing," she says. It's human nature to gravitate toward shortcuts. People may think of some of the quick-fix stuff as relics of the past, like the aforementioned vibrating belt machines marketed to women in the mid-20th century, when it was thought that exercise wasn't just unbecoming of women but potentially dangerous. There were also later developments that followed in the belt's wake, like the sauna suits of the 1970s and the ab belts of the '90s. These concepts persist, just in different formats. There are the shaking weights that promise to rattle your bicep curls into overdrive, vibrating platforms for you to balance on to turbocharge your squats, and sculpting machines that promise to boost your glutes without you having to do a single squat. "It's human nature to gravitate toward shortcuts," says Cedric Bryant, the president and CEO of the American Council on Exercise. Those shortcuts sound nice, but the research on many of them is limited, and where it does exist, it's often conducted or paid for by the companies selling the products. "The concern with all of these gadgets is that, similar to supplements for weight loss and health benefits, there is no, or at least very little, data and strong comprehensive studies that show, yes, this is going to be beneficial," says Jessica Bartfield, a clinical associate professor of weight management at Wake Forest University's School of Medicine. ACE has commissioned research institutions to test the claims of many of these low-effort, heavily marketed products, Bryant says, and for the most part, they've found many offer marginal benefit at best. And none are a substitute for a comprehensive, regular program of physical activity. "The science behind most of these products is weak, often anecdotal, and almost always overhyped," he says. The effects these products do have aren't particularly impressive. Take the example of electromagnetic body sculpting treatments, such as Emsculpt, which are supposed to tighten muscle and burn fat. One review of the literature on the practice found that patients' measurements decreased by 2.9 millimeters on average, or about a 10th of an inch. "That doesn't seem like very much," says Melanie Jay, the director of the NYU Langone Comprehensive Program on Obesity. It doesn't give you the same benefits as exercise or losing weight and maintaining weight loss. In response to a request for comment, a spokesperson for BTL Aesthetics, the maker of Emsculpt, sent along a pair of presentations from the company touting the product's ability to increase muscle strength, prevent muscle loss, and enhance flexibility. They also pushed back on the conclusions drawn by the 2022 literature review, arguing in part that its data largely encompasses the Emsculpt, not the newer Emsculpt Neo (though two of the studies the independent paper cites include the newer version as well). They put me in touch with two doctors to vouch for the device — Jonathan Schoeff, of Rocky Mountain Advanced Spine Access, and Eugene Lou, from Minivasive Orthopedics. Schoeff said that the Emsculpt is a powerful tool to "direct metabolic change" though he advises patients it's not a replacement for the gym. Lou said the device "absolutely can be" a replacement for exercise, citing the positive experience of two of his patients in rehab settings. Schoeff is a paid educational consultant for BTL and participated in research sponsored by the company. Lou is a paid speaker for the company. Leah Verebes, a physical therapist and assistant professor at Touro University, notes that studies and independent reviews indicate that the fat loss effects of Emsculpt are modest and often within the margin of error. "Overall, Emsculpt is best suited for functional wellness and rehabilitation, not significant weight loss or body contouring," she says. She had comparable thoughts on EMS suits, like the one I tried: they have some potential in the rehab world, but their fitness value outside that is more about getting the ball rolling on a behavioral shift. In other words, if the shocking suit gets me off the couch, fine, but otherwise, I can move on. Verebes is similarly agnostic on the Shake Weight, an as-seen-on-TV classic. It's better than nothing, and the shaking may recruit more muscles than a regular weight, but it's not a replacement for a regular strength routine. "I think you might look a little funny with the Shake Weight, but you know what? If it's getting somebody who normally would just sit on the couch and flex their elbow bringing the can to their mouth, at least they're doing something that's getting their body moving," she says. Coming into this story, I expected the people I talked to to do a real LOL when I mentioned various devices, but that's not entirely what happened. Many of them seemed supportive of the idea that if a wacky little accessory is a way to get people to start doing something, so be it. But people should be realistic about how effective said devices are and whether buying them will actually change their habits. "There's a motivational piece here for people who are ready to change their health," Zizzi says. In sports psychology, motivation driven by outside factors like a new gadget or some office competition often gets "pooh-poohed," he adds, but all motivation is useful. It's just that extrinsic motivation fades fast. He points to the example of fitness trackers — when people get them, they use them and may even increase their activity, but over time that use declines. The fitness graveyard is filled with fads of the past. Who among us hasn't bought a treadmill or a bike or an ab roller, thinking, "This will finally be the thing that gets me to work out," only for it to sit in the corner and collect dust? People's starting points matter, too. Take the devices that let you pedal your legs while watching TV. "On a scale of fitness, it's a 1 out of 10 or a 2 out of 10," Zizzi says. "If you did that and you are diabetic and you don't get any other physical activity, that's probably better than telling somebody, 'Hey, you need to walk, walk 30 minutes a day, five days a week to meet guidelines, or it doesn't count.'" Of course, this isn't all just harmless. Some of these products may hurt people — the supermodel Linda Evangelista said she experienced rare but severe side effects after undergoing CoolSculpting, which is supposed to freeze away fat. Basically, all fitness-related contraptions come with some sort of disclosure or require you to sign something saying that if you get injured or die, it's on you. Jay, from NYU, says she's never recommended one of these treatment hacks to patients. "Maybe if they're trying to decide between a tummy tuck or one of these, I don't know. A tummy tuck is probably more effective, but of course, the risks and the downtime might be higher," she says. But that's not really the point. "The bigger point is that it doesn't give you the same benefits as exercise or losing weight and maintaining weight loss." If I decided I absolutely could not live without the EMS suit, it would probably be an OK addition to my normal workout routine. But I shouldn't try to get by on less than half an hour of exercise once a week. As Verebes said, these sorts of workouts might be better suited to particular applications. Bryant notes that EMS could be helpful for people recovering from an injury because "it helps to restore the connection between the nervous systems and the muscles." For a healthy person, however, the benefit is "going to be much less dramatic." Even the experts and their loved ones aren't immune to this stuff. Jay bought a vibrating platform, but she got really dizzy on it, so she gave it away. Mehlman Petrzela's son bought an ab belt he saw on TikTok. The modern narrative around fitness is that it's not just about being thin — it's about being strong, healthy, and fit at any weight. But underneath all that is an enduring truth: People want to look conventionally attractive. Those attitudes feed the tricks that have long plagued the fitness industry. People get duped by supplements that supposedly burn fat while they sleep and vests that claim to sculpt abs while they sit on the couch, not because they're actually trying to improve their fitness levels, but because they're looking for a shortcut to an aesthetic goal that's often unattainable. "There can be a lot of misinformation, a lot of gimmicks or gadgets or supplements where they make some promises and there is no evidence, no data, to support them," Bartfield says. Social media doesn't help the situation. It places unrealistic aesthetic expectations in front of us all the time — and lets companies sell us endless ways to attempt to achieve them in 10- or 15-second video bites. My Instagram knows that I'm fitness-curious and weight-conscious; it's filled with ads for weight-loss drugs and quick-fix fitness gear. I regularly exchange various hacky fitness ads with friends. The (very skinny) elephant in the room here is the rise of GLP-1 weight-loss drugs. Exercise can be arduous and hard. Going to the gym often isn't an instantly gratifying activity. Beyond the overarching purpose that is long-term health, you don't really noticeably accomplish anything with a single run on the treadmill or one set of squats. It's natural that people would rather skip to the fun part of nailing that summer body without sweating it out in a spin class on a frigid day in March. "People are wired for these fast, easy solutions, and your brain naturally goes toward the area of least resistance," Verebes says. The (very skinny) elephant in the room here is the rise of GLP-1 weight-loss drugs such as Wegovy (which is the same as Ozempic) and Zepbound (Mounjaro) that really do seem to deliver miracles. They help people with obesity lose weight and, as long as they keep taking the drugs, keep it off. For many people, these drugs can make a real change to their lives. These pretty miraculous drugs may have people looking for miracles elsewhere, which obesity doctors and fitness trainers warn against. GLP-1s need to be accompanied by healthier diets and exercise routines, especially since they can lead to muscle loss. Being thin is not synonymous with being in great shape. "We certainly do not want people to think that you can lose weight, and that equals health," Bartfield says. "There's the idea of nutritional quality, the idea of body composition, right? Maintaining muscle mass." In what would be shocking news to my younger self, I genuinely enjoy exercise. As a person who also likes to eat and drink a fair amount (a fact that would not be a surprise to younger me), I work out most days of the week as part of a perpetual balancing act. But I'm also not immune to the appeal of shortcuts. In my 20s, I tried to work while sitting on an exercise ball, but I had to stop because I couldn't stop myself from slightly bouncing up and down as I typed and making myself nauseous. A few years ago, at the advice of my mother, I spent a couple of thousand dollars on CoolSculpt, which, as far as I could tell, had little effect. I've gone farther down the GLP-1 "microdosing" research rabbit hole than I'd like to admit, though the price tag always scares me off. I don't want to work out with no work, but I'd like to work out with less work. Fitness isn't as easy as diet and exercise. It's also not something that people can hack their way into. To reap the benefits of exercise, you kind of have to exercise. That doesn't mean running a marathon, but it doesn't mean vibrating the fat cells away, either. The good news is that the simplest stuff is cheap or free — go for a walk, lift a weight, find an activity you like. The bad news is that it requires time and effort that a quick-fix mentality doesn't allow for. In the days after my little EMS suit adventure, I was a little sore, indicating the device probably did something. But I won't be going back. The price point was not within my budget — membership at the studio I went to was $225 a month, and you can do it only once a week, which means more than $50 a class. Plus, as mentioned, the intermittent shocking really was not for me. I'll be doing things the old-fashioned way, one weight and stride at a time, until an ad inevitably gets me once again, and I'm testing out the 2026 version of the vibrating belt.

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