Tracee Ellis Ross on the joy and loneliness of solo travel

Boston Globe

5 days ago

'Solo Traveling With Tracee Ellis Ross,' now available for free on The Roku Channel, premieres at a time when solo travel is growing ever more popular, despite criticisms that it can be scary, boring or unsatisfying. Black women in particular, who are actively prioritizing their well-being, are encouraging one another in Reddit threads and in the comments section of travel enthusiasts' social media accounts. Within these spaces, women are swapping notes on issues like safety, racism, sexism and loneliness -- all of which Ross discusses during her travels to Spain, Mexico and Morocco.
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The following interview with Ross has been edited and condensed for clarity.
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Q: Is there any advice you want to impart to solo travelers?
A: I don't believe in advice. I offer experience and hope. And this is my version. My transparency is about how I can give you a jumping-off point.
I say this in the Mexico episode: There's got to be something between cat ladies and Joan of Arc. You know what I mean?
Like, I really wish I had some other pictures on the wall culturally and historically that would show me what it means to push up against the cultural norm and choose yourself -- of the revolutionary act of joy, particularly for a Black woman, and of having the agency and the freedom to make choices that work for you, whether you have a partner or not
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Q: Loneliness isn't often acknowledged on travel shows. Did you plan to address the topic, or did it just come up naturally?
A: Well, I didn't tackle it on purpose. I just tackled what was honest.
Sometimes things that didn't make you lonely at home might make you feel lonely while you're away. And sometimes things that you don't enjoy at home will become things you enjoy when you're away.
I really wanted to make space for the show to feel as intimate and as truthful as the experience I was actually having. Sometimes I have to remind myself that feeling lonely doesn't necessarily mean that something's wrong. It just means I have to make space for the feeling.
Q: Can we talk about that moment where you're dining alone and another table sends you a drink?
A: I'm glad that you brought up that moment.
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So, they sent over something -- I don't know, a drink. And I went over to thank them.
In that moment, one of the women was pretty much saying, 'I felt bad for you.' And I was like, 'No, no, don't feel bad for me. This is a choice. And it's a joyful choice. And it's an exciting choice. And it's a life-affirming choice. And here's why.'
Q: Were you ever concerned about how to make alone time interesting?
A: I think there's a myth that I had to be doing things on the show. And I was like, well, I wouldn't do that. People were worried that it wasn't going to be entertaining. I was, like, have you met me? I'm nuts. I've got stuff to say.
I had to figure out how to share this experience, this very intimate experience of solo travel. You can't just be in silence the whole time. And so a lot of the show was filmed on my phone, as opposed to being filmed by the camera guy. I would talk to my phone as if it were my inner dialogue.
Q: What went into the choosing destinations for the show?
A: One of the things I talk about when people ask about solo travel is: First and foremost, what kind of experience do you want as a solo traveler?
I think you have to ask yourself that question -- particularly as a woman, particularly as a Black woman, or if you're LGBTQIA or nonbinary. What are the places and the ways you might be vulnerable in spaces that are not your home? And if the goal is to be yourself, by yourself, out in the world, how can you do that safely?
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And so I asked those questions as we were planning the show.
Q: Fashion is such a big part of the show.
Each episode begins in your home while you're packing -- and
it seems like a meticulous process.
A: I joke, but I'm serious about this: I pack for beauty and I pack for disaster.
When I say I'm an overpacker, it is at a level that is completely off the radar. I understand this. I am not in denial about it.
Q: Do you approve of packing cubes?
A: No. The only things I like packing cubes for are my lingerie, like my undies and socks, because otherwise they go everywhere. But I also like to put my socks inside my shoes so I'm not wasting space.
Q: Where and when did you take your first solo trip?
A: I went to Pink Sands in the Bahamas when I was shooting 'The Dish.' I'm not sure what made me decide to go or why I decided to go by myself, but I know what I got out of it.
One of the things that I love about traveling solo is the sense of heightened experience -- heightened relaxation, heightened joy, heightened discomfort. You start to get a muscle strength, an emotional muscle strength around self-soothing and holding space for yourself and what your tools are in those moments that you bring back into your life.
This article originally appeared in
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