10 films from Scotchland that could escape Trump's bigly tariffs
Braveheart
Braveheart (Image: free) Some newspaper critic once said this movie 'serves up a great big steaming pile of haggis,' that it got its dates all wrong, that Wallace came from Renfrewshire – not some Highland hut – and that everyone looks like they're appearing in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome and points out that Wallace's girlfriend has perfect teeth. But didn't they also have very good dentists in the 13th century? Fake news, baby. And why was this movie deemed a little homophobic? Who's to say Edward 2nd didn't sprance around the French palace in baby blue crushed velvet? As you know, I have so many fabulous friends who happen to be gay, but I am a traditionalist, and I think the movie was right on the money. And for those who say Wallace couldn't have impregnated Isabella of France, because she would have been nine at the time in 1304, well that's just the sort of fake news you would expect from Macron's people.
Gregory's Girl
Gregory's Girl (Image: free) At first, I didn't like this guy, Gregory. He couldn't score, and unlike me the blondes didn't take to him at all. And he clearly wasn't a team player, like me. But it's a great movie because it teaches young guys what foxes women can be, that they're all Hilarys and Kamalas at heart, like the one he ended up, from the pop band who sings Happy Birthday all time. And if you're not careful women will have you lying on the grass and doing hand dancing. And what good is that?
Trainspotting
Begbie bar fight scene from Trainspotting. Filmed in the Crosslands bar, Glasgow (Image: unknown) Doncha just love the honesty in this movie, when Rent Boy declares it's sh*** being Scottish, and points out how Scotland has been colonised by England. And what he was really saying was the truth; let's not be colonised by England, but by America. Make Scotland Great Again. And hats with MSGA will be available in my golf shop in Turnberry any day now. Fifty bucks each. Awesome baby. A bigly idea.
Restless Natives
Restless Natives (Image: free) Beautiful story. About two lovable rogues – they could be JD Vance and me, couldn't they? – although JD is definitely the one in the clown mask, who take money from the tourists who have been leeching off their beautiful country for the longest time. And why shouldn't you tariff the tourists? And if they help make Scotland great again, how can you not love it?
Greyfriar's Bobby
My old Scots friend Janey Godley one described me as a 'Greyfriar's Bobby', and I took it to mean that she thought me a very, very loyal, sorta guy, the kind who find themselves surrounded each day by local kids all wearing big saucer-shaped Bisto caps and nice ladies from Morningside who were kind, although not that good looking. And I guess she thought I was the kinda guy who would sleep in a cold, damp cemetery for 14 years to be close to the person I loved most. And it's true. I would sleep next to me any day.
Whisky Galore
Whisky Galore (Image: free)
My Mama loved this movie, being an island girl herself, which is all about showing the big guys you can't be pushed around, and if you have to break a few little laws then why not? I can't stand Scotch myself, but Mama loved a glass with her porridge in the morning. And I guess Diet Coke Galore doesn't have the same ring.
Great Escape
I love prison movies. I love anything to do with Alcatraz, any way you can lock up people who eat cats. And I know this is not really a Scottish movie, but it featured only these wonderful Scottish actors, who were so brave and so defiant, like Mr Hudson from Upstairs Downstairs, one of the Men From Uncle and Wee Shughie McFee from Crossroads - who all led the way to freedom against evil with nothing but kitchen spoons to dig their way out. But we've got shovels these days to show China what we're made of. Yes, I know the Escape guys all died at the end, but don't we all at some time? Although I'm told if you drink enough bleach you can push that off almost indefinitely.
The Wicker Man
The Wicker Man (Image: free) I love the theme of human sacrifice, because all of us humans have to sacrifice something, right? That's what I said to Zebedee, or Zelensky, or whatever his name is. I said, 'Look at me, I've sacrificed my freedom as an individual to make America great again, I've given up on my ego.' He looked at me in awe, which told me he agreed totally. But back to the movie. Isn't it great that men are portrayed in roles of power and women are hypersexualized and isn't this the way it should be? What's the point of sexy underwear if you can't wear it in a movie? I know Scottish underwear relies on a lot of heavy flannel, but that can work too. But wasn't it great that Britt Ekland didn't have to wear any, although I hear Rod wasn't too happy about it, but then he doesn't play golf, and he used to wear Spandex trousers so who the hell cares?
Geordie
Young handsome guy with great hair and a beautiful smile becomes champion of the world... You can see why I love this film. Okay, I've never slept with my feet out the window on a cold winter's night, except the time Stormy ran over my toes with the golf buggy. What's also great about this movie is Geordie wasn't seduced by the Russian with the big biceps – that would have been a terrible thing – but the moral of this movie is sometimes you've gotta kiss a little ass to get what you want, which is the cute babe with the fruit in her hat and world domination.
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Scotsman
2 hours ago
- Scotsman
Edinburgh Fringe theatre reviews #CHARLOTTESVILLE Ohio The Monkeypox Gospel The Ego
Sign up to our Arts and Culture newsletter, get the latest news and reviews from our specialist arts writers Sign up Thank you for signing up! Did you know with a Digital Subscription to The Scotsman, you can get unlimited access to the website including our premium content, as well as benefiting from fewer ads, loyalty rewards and much more. Learn More Sorry, there seem to be some issues. Please try again later. Submitting... #CHARLOTTESVILLE ★★★★ Pleasance Courtyard (Venue 33) until 25 August Ohio ★★★★ Assembly Roxy (Venue 139) until 24 August With the United States thrown into turmoil by Donald Trump's second prsidency, it's fascinating to see those American dramas of doubt, division and aggressive certainty play out across the Edinburgh Fringe; and nowhere more so than Priyanka Shetty's impassioned solo show #Charlottesville, produced by Yellow Raincoat and Richard Jordan in association with the Pleasance. Subtitled 'The play that Trump does not want you to see!', Shetty's show is a powerful docudrama about the events of 2017 in the city of Charlottesville, home of the University of Virginia, which Shetty witnessed as a young first year theatre student of Indian origin. Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad Ohio | Oliver Rosser Enraged by a city council decision to remove some statues and memorials commemorating Confederate leaders, the American far right, emboldened by Trump's election the previous year, vowed to stage massive demonstrations in the normally quiet university city; and amid the torchlit white supremacist marches and huge counter-demonstrations that followed, one woman demonstrator was killed by a man who drove his car into the crowd. Shetty chronicles all this in vivid narrative style, with sharp and telling use of projected video images. Alongside this shocking story of a quiet town confronted with an overt politics of hatred, though, she also has a tale to tell of the more subtle oppression and marginalisation she suffers at the hands of her university department, who see nothing wrong with directors repeatedly refusing to cast her for student productions because of her skin colour, and aggressively forbid her to make a show about the Charlottesville events. The result is a riveting tale, told with intelligence and feeling, that cuts to the heart of the lingering racism and overt white supremacism that is helping to reshape American politics. And Shetty's powerful stage presence is a living reminder both of the profound crisis the United states faces, and of its enduring capacity, despite Trump's best efforts, to offer new Americans from across the world the chance to find, and raise, their own voices. In their show Ohio, at Assembly Roxy, US indie-folk duo The Bengsons - Shaun and Abigail - offer their audiences a much more meditative insight into the tensions that divide American society. Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad In what they call 'an ecstatic grief concert' - a one-hour cycle of songs punctuated by narrative - they chart their own personal journeys from childhoods shaped by religious faith (hers light-touch Jewish, his in a strict and devout Christian sect) through a long youthful process of doubt, rebellion, rejection, and rage, towards some kind of new accommodation with the aspects of life that are both spiritual and unknowable. The experience that shapes them includes Sean's increasing profound deafness, inherited from his preacher father, and the premature birth of their son, when the baby's life hangs in the balance. None of this, though, ever seems to diminish the magnificent, raw strength of their music, of Shaun's guitar and Abigail's wild, magnificent singing, which ranges from the gentlest of dances and laments to heart-tearing rebel yells of rage and grief; in a show whose music comes from the very heart of American culture - religious, folk-based, touched by soul and blues - yet always succeeds in forging it into something brilliant, and new. Joyce McMillan The Monkeypox Gospel ★★★ Underbelly Cowgate (Venue 61) until 24 August There's a lot going on in Ngofeen Mputubwele's debut stage show The Monkeypox Gospel; and so there should be, given the importance of the subjects he tackles, which include the science of pandemics, the politics of vaccination, and the impact of lingering colonial attitudes on human health and health care. Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad His subject is the monkeypox (now renamed m-pox) epidemic of 2022; but since m-pox, like AIDS, is often transmitted by sex between gay men, Mputubwele fears that by writing honestly about it, he will finally expose himself to complete exclusion from his Congolese family and community. The problem with the show, though, is that in a short 60 minutes, Mputubwele - who is an award-nominated podcast producer, as well as a journalist and lawyer - throws absolutely everything at it, from a massively noisy mixed soundtrack that sometimes drowns out his words (although he is a big man with a big voice), to awkward episodes in which he works through his traumas - as a gay man from a strictly religious background, and a black African living in New York - by performing extracts from Verdi's La Traviata, and dancing to the strains of Tchaikovsky's ballet music. 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There is an unsettling commentary on informed consent performed to the tune of Marilyn Manson, and a message, written over Google Docs, reveals the soft, fragile centre of the play (what it is, what it isn't, why it is, and where it came from). This is overlayed by footage of manatees, who by law, cannot be harmed. What would it be to have the same rights as a manatee, they ask? Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad The overall shape of the piece means the final moments are somewhat anticlimactic, but each layer holds intrigue and meaning, and its conclusion poses powerful questions, nonetheless. Josephine Balfour-Oatts Jello Brain ★★★ Greenside @ George Street (Venue 236) until 23 August What starts off as a show about an anxious young woman's fear of getting of getting Alzheimer's disease, following her mother's diagnosis at the age of 55, turns into not so much a demystification of the illness and its effects, but a celebration of a charming mother-daughter relationship that prevails through the challenges. Written and performed by Natalie Grove, it begins with Natalie's Mum going to live in a place called 'Memory Care' and Natalie taking Xanex to deal with her worry of also getting the disease which, conversely, might in the long-term also make her ill. Grove's head is initially filled with the facts she's researched online about the disease, which are adding to her anxiety but also her knowledge. 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Glasgow Times
3 hours ago
- Glasgow Times
Pop star tribute show coming to M&D's in September
M&D's Scotland's Theme Park in Motherwell will host Flowers and Friendship Bracelets, an outdoor event featuring tribute acts for Taylor Swift, Sabrina Carpenter, Olivia Rodrigo and Miley Cyrus. The concert, which will take place on Saturday, September 7, from noon to 6pm, will also feature a guest DJ, games, prizes, merchandise, memorabilia and a variety of street food. Jensen Taylor Connelly, director at M&D's, said: 'This promises to be a great family afternoon of singing, dancing and all-round fun.' Read more: Huge American band announce show at OVO Hydro in Glasgow (Image: Supplied) Read more: Inbetweeners stars tease new project together and fans are going wild Tickets are priced at £24.95 plus a booking fee and can be purchased from the Scotland's theme park website at Visitors can also purchase a package deal including a theme park wristband for £39.45. Located beside Strathclyde Country Park, M&D's offers a range of rides and attractions for all ages. Highlights include Amazonia, an indoor tropical rainforest filled with exotic plants and animals, as well as Devil's Island Adventure Golf, Cosmic Bowl, a ten-pin bowling alley, and Krazy Congo soft play. The park also features multiple dining options, including the award-winning American-themed diner Monterey Jack's.
Metro
4 hours ago
- Metro
'I play Wallace and Elon Musk - only one of them actually made it to space'
How do you follow up capturing the hearts of the nation with a new Wallace & Gromit film? For Ben Whitehead, who took over the role of Wallace from late legend Peter Sallis, he's gone in an entirely different direction – playing Elon Musk on stage. The actor can currently be seen in David Morley's Elon Musk: Lost In Space, which runs until Saturday during the Edinburgh Fringe at the Grand Theatre at theSpace @ Surgeons' Hall. Speaking exclusively to Metro, Ben pointed out while there are some similarities between Wallace and Elon, the beloved inventor has the upper hand. 'He's got much more experience of going to space than Elon Musk, he made it to another planet,' he quipped. 'Come on! He's doing much better.' As well as flying to the Moon in A Grand Day Out, Wallace and Gromit also landed on Mars in 2023 VR game The Grand Getaway – so how can Elon catch up? To view this video please enable JavaScript, and consider upgrading to a web browser that supports HTML5 video '[Elon] has a dog, but I think he needs a Gromit,' he pondered. 'There's only one, and Wallace isn't gonna let it go!' The similarities largely end at space travel ambitions (Wallace was more focused on literal cheese than money), and Ben admitted he had some reservations about playing the billionaire. 'Musk wasn't even on my radar until about a year ago when he started interfering in European politics,' he pointed out. 'I [didn't] know if I can do it. And I think when you when you sort of say that to yourself, you've got to find out!' The 70-minute show – which also stars Sarah Lawrie as Elon's spaceship AI, M-UTHA – is described as a 'darkly comic sci-fi satire' as the richest man in the world hops aboard one of his own ships. He gets a call from President Donald Trump (also voiced by Ben) which 'sends his mission, as well as his mind, spiralling off-course'. The Wallace & Gromit star admitted he had to create an alternate version of the characters in the show rather than just doing a spot-on impression. 'You can't do that for an hour on stage. The audience will be asleep,' he explained. 'It's a playful version of Elon Musk, who's imagining himself as Captain Kirk, Buzz Lightyear, out in space.' He also had to find the right way to tackle such a divisive and controversial figure. 'There's never been anyone like him, as far as billionaires are concerned, so much in the public eye. But he also does things that, you know, you think, well, that's quite that's altruistic,' he argued. 'You really wanted to build a car that doesn't run on fossil fuels, because we're gonna have to have vehicles that can't run petrol? There's something commendable about that.' When it comes to the controversy around the SpaceX founder – environmentalist groups have been putting stickers on the show's posters at the Fringe – the actor doesn't dwell on it. 'It's a comedy. How are we going to make this funny? That's the priority,' he explained. '[But] there's definitely controversy with a character like this, who courts it so much and makes these bizarre statements and claims, and is unbelievably wealthy. Do we need billionaires in the world? There's a lot of questions to be answered, at least to us.' Ben's thrived in a role allowing him to 'chew the scenery' and deliver an 'over the top', physical performance, having spent a lot of time on his own in a recording booth for 2024's Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl. There was also scope for improv in rehearsals for the play, although he was 'positively encouraged' to ad lib during Wallace & Gromit recordings. 'I'm fairly sure none of the ad lib, improvised stuff actually ended up in the film, which is just testament to the great script,' he admitted. 'I'm careful what I say in the booth as well. I'll just always go off on one and see where it heads. But we don't make that public!' There's an elephant in the room, after the huge success of Vengeance Most Fowl and an enduring appetite for all things Wallace and Gromit. 'Have you heard anything? No one's told me anything,' Ben joked about the future of the franchise, while suggesting there's nothing on the immediate horizon. 'It would be fantastic to work on another Wallace and Gromit,' he said. 'The film was so good, so it would be brilliant, but you can't rush these guys to make a film. We'll see what happens.' As the dust settles, Ben has continued to work in theatre and while he's no stranger at the Fringe, Lost In Space marks his first official job at the festival. More Trending '[After Vengeance Most Fowl], I suppose you think, 'Well, maybe someone else will give me a job now doing something. This is my first job at the Edinburgh Fringe. So it has happened,' he chucked. However, he argued that any level of success doesn't guarantee regular work, especially in the arts – and Ben's open to whatever opportunities come his way. 'I don't just expect to get work. Doesn't matter who you are, you know, what you've done, you've still got to keep plugging away,' he said. 'I'd love to maybe come back [to the Fringe] next year, with, with my own show, and see how that goes down.' View More » Elon Musk: Lost In Space is on at Grand Theatre at theSpace @ Surgeons' Hall at 15:05pm all this week. Head here for tickets. Got a story? If you've got a celebrity story, video or pictures get in touch with the entertainment team by emailing us celebtips@ calling 020 3615 2145 or by visiting our Submit Stuff page – we'd love to hear from you. MORE: BBC bosses 'unable to retrieve Huw Edwards' £200k salary' amid huge job cuts MORE: MasterChef winner claims John Torode was 'hung out to dry' by BBC bosses MORE: James Norton suffers horror injury on set of new BBC series
