Danny Abdallah opens up about forgiving the drunk driver who killed three of his children for the sake of his marriage
Danny and Leila Abdallah's daughters, Sienna, 8, and Angelina, 12, their son Anthony, 13, and niece Veronique Sakr, 11, were fatally hit by a car on February 1, 2020.
The four children, along with three other siblings and cousins, were walking on the footpath, along Bettington Road in Sydney 's north-west suburb of Oatlands, when a ute mounted the kerb and struck them from behind.
Behind the wheel was Samuel Davidson, who was drunk and high on drugs when he lost control of his vehicle and ploughed into them.
Davidson is serving 20 years behind bars having had his sentence reduced from 28 years on appeal.
Speaking with KIIS FM's The Kyle & Jackie O on Friday, Mr Abdallah attributed his and his wife's forgiveness to their Christian faith.
But Mr Abdallah added that he has forgiven Davidson for the sake of his marriage and his surviving children.
'At the end of the day, I've still got three other kids. I need to be a father too and I need to be a husband to my wife, and it's already hard enough,' Mr Abdallah said.
'They reckon 65 per cent of marriages fail after losing one child, let alone three. So every decision wasn't about me, it was about them.
'Do I pour bitterness, anger and revenge, or love, compassion and forgiveness? Because whatever I give, it'll affect everyone in that circle.'
Mr Abdallah explained the death of his children taught him the 'science behind forgiveness' and why it was important for his family.
'Faith is faith. Everyone has it in every faith, you've got to forgive, but no one understands why,' he said.
'But now I understand that forgiveness is a gift that you give your family, you give your kids, because kids do what you do.
'It's an important tool to equip your life with if you want to have a beautiful home.'
When asked whether the couple allows their surviving children to venture down the road on their own, Mr Abdallah said he did not want them to live in fear.
'It's not that hard with my boys. [My 11-year-old] went for a bit of a bike ride down the road and back,' Mr Abdallah said.
Mr Abdallah's most recent discussion with Davidson will air on Seven's Spotlight on Sunday
'I can't live my life for them to just make them feel afraid. They just went for a walk.'
Mr Abdallah previously revealed that not only have he and Davidson spoken, but the pair now speak every month.
He said Davidson always asks him about his surviving children and his wife Leila, who recently gave birth to their eighth child.
His most recent visit with Davidson was with a television crew from Seven's Spotlight, with the recorded interview due to air on Sunday.
Mr Abdallah said he wanted to show the world what his discussions with Davidson involved and that he was not a monster.
'I never thought of the character of the person. I chose to forgive him early in the piece and focus on my family,' he said.
'It was just three years later when I decided to visit him. I realised this guy could have been my son, could have been my mate.
'You see things in a greater perspective. It's not just you've done wrong by me but what's going on? What's happened to his family? And you look at things in a different light.'
After the tragedy, Leila and Danny set up the i4give foundation to honour their children and their niece.
The foundation, which has an i4give day on February 1 every year, is aimed at engaging communities across Australia in a 'shared embrace of the universal good of forgiveness'.
'Anything you do in life is a choice, not a feeling,' Mr Abdallah said.
'Whether it's going to the gym, whether it's anything you do, and that's the same as forgiveness. It's not a feeling. It's a choice that you have to make.'
The Abdallah and Sakr families in 2024 unveiled a permanent memorial to their children at the crash site outside Oatlands Golf Club.
Prime Minister Anthony Albanese and his predecessor Scott Morrison were there, as were NSW Premier Chris Minns and former premier Dominic Perrottet, all of whom have all spent time with the family since the tragedy.
Speaking at the ceremony, Mr Abdallah thanked his wife for being his 'pillar of strength' as they revealed four sandstone plinths featuring each of the children's faces.
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