Ten policies that would make me the perfect prime minister
There are so many policies from all sides, and yet nothing that makes the average person sit up and pay attention. So, vote for me! Here are the 10 changes I'll make on day one.
Ban all leaf blowers. There'll be a buyback system, similar to the gun amnesty. 'Too expensive,' I hear you say. 'Not at all,' I reply. When the day comes – when we will melt down all the leaf-blowers in one giant, joyous conflagration – we'll make back all the money by selling tickets to a grateful public.
Ban any additional TV streaming services. Yet another one has just arrived – Max – and, according to members of my family, we'll have to subscribe because it offers shows to which they are already addicted. Yes, I say, that's fine, so long as we unsubscribe to one of the others. No. Impossible. We have to keep this one for the grandchildren, and this one for Jocasta, and this other one so I can watch Clarkson's Farm (for no better reason than the sound of me chuckling over Jeremy Clarkson so annoys Jocasta). Don't destroy families! Let the government step in. Mark down Max as the maximum. No further streamers allowed.
Ban shrinkflation. They reduce the size of the product, hoping no one will notice, and suddenly, your recipe is a dud because there's less tuna in the can. There are also not enough Tim Tams to sustain a drive to Melbourne. I say: ban this evil! Or at least force supermarkets to add a sign: 'Beware: there are now only nine biscuits in this pack. You'll only get to Albury.'
Mandate the 'generous pour' in pubs and restaurants. I know what you're thinking: I'm just trying to win the alcoholic vote, but fair is fair. Beer drinkers can order a jug, while spirit lovers can ask for a double, but the poor wine drinker is often left with the choice of ordering a whole bottle (unseemly) or leaving the bar with a puddle of chardonnay glumly staring up from the bottom of an enormous glass. Some establishments offer a choice of 'standard' or 'large'. I say: why not all? Say 'cheers' if you agree.
Bring in DNA testing for chewing gum miscreants. Here's the worst feeling: you place your hand under the chair or table, and there it is: the wad of chewing gum, shoved there by some thoughtless oaf. OK, my policy might be a bit Clive Palmer/Pauline Hanson, but let's test that gum. Years later, when that teenager is 60 and sends his sample to the National Bowel Cancer Screening Program, we'll have him bang to rights. Oh, the feeling.
Ban the social kiss. Women hate it, but men do too. COVID let us off the hook for a while, but now the social kiss is back. Peril, once more, lurks at every social occasion. How well do I know her? Or, we work together but are also friends, so what are the rules? And what if I go for the left cheek, and then she shifts position, and we end up ... Oh, it's all too awful. Ban it. Ban it good.
No advertising when you are on hold. OK, I understand that Westpac, Qantas, or the NRMA may not be able to take my call instantly. I'm willing to wait. I'm happy to read the paper while I wait. But I can't read the paper because the music is constantly interrupted by a voice, which I, in my sweet hopefulness, take to be an actual person, ready to help me, only to realise, time and time again, it's another advertisement, destroying my concentration. Here's my policy: no voices until it's a real one.
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The Advertiser
2 days ago
- The Advertiser
Call for federal police to examine death in custody
Federal police should take over the investigation into the death in custody of a young Aboriginal man as a "step towards healing and justice", an Indigenous MP says. Northern Territory MP Marion Scrymgour said a criminal investigation was a job "only police can undertake" but it did not have to be conducted by NT detectives when federal police could step in. Her call comes amid growing pressure for an independent investigation into the death of mentally disabled man Kumanjayi White on May 27. He died shortly after being forcibly restrained by two plain-clothes police officers in a supermarket in Alice Springs. Police allege the 24-year-old, originally from the outback community of Yuendumu, was shoplifting and had assaulted a security guard who confronted him in the confectionery aisle. NT Police and Chief Minister Lia Finocchiaro have strongly rejected calls for an external investigation, saying police are the right authority to carry out an investigation coupled with a coronial inquiry. Ms Scrymgour, the federal member for Lingiari, said at the end of the day it had to be a police decision whether to lay criminal charges. "But it doesn't have to be NT Police officers who undertake the task," she said in a statement. Having the AFP take over would extract NT detectives from a role which would subject them to scrutiny and criticism as well as enable the Yuendumu community to have full confidence in the process, the MP said. "Just as happened during the COVID lockdown period, police officers from outside the NT can be brought in." Meanwhile, outspoken senator Lidia Thorpe said Friday marked five years since the global Black Lives Matter mobilisation sparked by the police killing of George Floyd in the US, with an officer's knee on his neck. "Kumanjayi White died the same way," she said in a statement on Thursday, citing an eyewitness account of the supermarket incident. "Since the Royal Commission into Aboriginal Deaths in Custody in 1991 at least 595 of our people have died in custody ... and not a single police or prison officer has ever been held criminally accountable," the senator said. On Wednesday evening, hundreds of people attended a candle-lit vigil outside the NT parliament in tribute to Mr White and to support his grieving desert community. A large banner stating "We stand with Yuendumu" was displayed in front of the parliament's entrance while another banner laid on the ground read "Justice for White". Organisers invited people to light candles or lay flowers following speeches highlighting the mistrust of police in Aboriginal communities and the need for an external inquiry into Mr White's death. Justice Not Jails spokesperson Jade Richie said "no police should be investigating police" in a death-in-custody case. Her group is organising a "national week of action" in response to Mr White's death, with vigils planned across the country. The Yuendumu community also lost 19-year-old Kumanjayi Walker in 2019 when he was fatally shot by then NT police officer Zachary Rolfe during a bungled arrest. Mr Rolfe was in 2022 found not guilty of all charges over the death. The Kumanjayi Walker coronial findings have been postponed until July 7 after Kumanjayi White's death in custody. Federal Indigenous Australians Minister Malarndirri McCarthy said on Thursday an independent death in custody probe might be warranted "in the interest of having some separation". 13YARN 13 92 76 Lifeline 13 11 14 beyondblue 1300 22 4636 Federal police should take over the investigation into the death in custody of a young Aboriginal man as a "step towards healing and justice", an Indigenous MP says. Northern Territory MP Marion Scrymgour said a criminal investigation was a job "only police can undertake" but it did not have to be conducted by NT detectives when federal police could step in. Her call comes amid growing pressure for an independent investigation into the death of mentally disabled man Kumanjayi White on May 27. He died shortly after being forcibly restrained by two plain-clothes police officers in a supermarket in Alice Springs. Police allege the 24-year-old, originally from the outback community of Yuendumu, was shoplifting and had assaulted a security guard who confronted him in the confectionery aisle. NT Police and Chief Minister Lia Finocchiaro have strongly rejected calls for an external investigation, saying police are the right authority to carry out an investigation coupled with a coronial inquiry. Ms Scrymgour, the federal member for Lingiari, said at the end of the day it had to be a police decision whether to lay criminal charges. "But it doesn't have to be NT Police officers who undertake the task," she said in a statement. Having the AFP take over would extract NT detectives from a role which would subject them to scrutiny and criticism as well as enable the Yuendumu community to have full confidence in the process, the MP said. "Just as happened during the COVID lockdown period, police officers from outside the NT can be brought in." Meanwhile, outspoken senator Lidia Thorpe said Friday marked five years since the global Black Lives Matter mobilisation sparked by the police killing of George Floyd in the US, with an officer's knee on his neck. "Kumanjayi White died the same way," she said in a statement on Thursday, citing an eyewitness account of the supermarket incident. "Since the Royal Commission into Aboriginal Deaths in Custody in 1991 at least 595 of our people have died in custody ... and not a single police or prison officer has ever been held criminally accountable," the senator said. On Wednesday evening, hundreds of people attended a candle-lit vigil outside the NT parliament in tribute to Mr White and to support his grieving desert community. A large banner stating "We stand with Yuendumu" was displayed in front of the parliament's entrance while another banner laid on the ground read "Justice for White". Organisers invited people to light candles or lay flowers following speeches highlighting the mistrust of police in Aboriginal communities and the need for an external inquiry into Mr White's death. Justice Not Jails spokesperson Jade Richie said "no police should be investigating police" in a death-in-custody case. Her group is organising a "national week of action" in response to Mr White's death, with vigils planned across the country. The Yuendumu community also lost 19-year-old Kumanjayi Walker in 2019 when he was fatally shot by then NT police officer Zachary Rolfe during a bungled arrest. Mr Rolfe was in 2022 found not guilty of all charges over the death. The Kumanjayi Walker coronial findings have been postponed until July 7 after Kumanjayi White's death in custody. Federal Indigenous Australians Minister Malarndirri McCarthy said on Thursday an independent death in custody probe might be warranted "in the interest of having some separation". 13YARN 13 92 76 Lifeline 13 11 14 beyondblue 1300 22 4636 Federal police should take over the investigation into the death in custody of a young Aboriginal man as a "step towards healing and justice", an Indigenous MP says. Northern Territory MP Marion Scrymgour said a criminal investigation was a job "only police can undertake" but it did not have to be conducted by NT detectives when federal police could step in. Her call comes amid growing pressure for an independent investigation into the death of mentally disabled man Kumanjayi White on May 27. He died shortly after being forcibly restrained by two plain-clothes police officers in a supermarket in Alice Springs. Police allege the 24-year-old, originally from the outback community of Yuendumu, was shoplifting and had assaulted a security guard who confronted him in the confectionery aisle. NT Police and Chief Minister Lia Finocchiaro have strongly rejected calls for an external investigation, saying police are the right authority to carry out an investigation coupled with a coronial inquiry. Ms Scrymgour, the federal member for Lingiari, said at the end of the day it had to be a police decision whether to lay criminal charges. "But it doesn't have to be NT Police officers who undertake the task," she said in a statement. Having the AFP take over would extract NT detectives from a role which would subject them to scrutiny and criticism as well as enable the Yuendumu community to have full confidence in the process, the MP said. "Just as happened during the COVID lockdown period, police officers from outside the NT can be brought in." Meanwhile, outspoken senator Lidia Thorpe said Friday marked five years since the global Black Lives Matter mobilisation sparked by the police killing of George Floyd in the US, with an officer's knee on his neck. "Kumanjayi White died the same way," she said in a statement on Thursday, citing an eyewitness account of the supermarket incident. "Since the Royal Commission into Aboriginal Deaths in Custody in 1991 at least 595 of our people have died in custody ... and not a single police or prison officer has ever been held criminally accountable," the senator said. On Wednesday evening, hundreds of people attended a candle-lit vigil outside the NT parliament in tribute to Mr White and to support his grieving desert community. A large banner stating "We stand with Yuendumu" was displayed in front of the parliament's entrance while another banner laid on the ground read "Justice for White". Organisers invited people to light candles or lay flowers following speeches highlighting the mistrust of police in Aboriginal communities and the need for an external inquiry into Mr White's death. Justice Not Jails spokesperson Jade Richie said "no police should be investigating police" in a death-in-custody case. Her group is organising a "national week of action" in response to Mr White's death, with vigils planned across the country. The Yuendumu community also lost 19-year-old Kumanjayi Walker in 2019 when he was fatally shot by then NT police officer Zachary Rolfe during a bungled arrest. Mr Rolfe was in 2022 found not guilty of all charges over the death. The Kumanjayi Walker coronial findings have been postponed until July 7 after Kumanjayi White's death in custody. Federal Indigenous Australians Minister Malarndirri McCarthy said on Thursday an independent death in custody probe might be warranted "in the interest of having some separation". 13YARN 13 92 76 Lifeline 13 11 14 beyondblue 1300 22 4636 Federal police should take over the investigation into the death in custody of a young Aboriginal man as a "step towards healing and justice", an Indigenous MP says. Northern Territory MP Marion Scrymgour said a criminal investigation was a job "only police can undertake" but it did not have to be conducted by NT detectives when federal police could step in. Her call comes amid growing pressure for an independent investigation into the death of mentally disabled man Kumanjayi White on May 27. He died shortly after being forcibly restrained by two plain-clothes police officers in a supermarket in Alice Springs. Police allege the 24-year-old, originally from the outback community of Yuendumu, was shoplifting and had assaulted a security guard who confronted him in the confectionery aisle. NT Police and Chief Minister Lia Finocchiaro have strongly rejected calls for an external investigation, saying police are the right authority to carry out an investigation coupled with a coronial inquiry. Ms Scrymgour, the federal member for Lingiari, said at the end of the day it had to be a police decision whether to lay criminal charges. "But it doesn't have to be NT Police officers who undertake the task," she said in a statement. Having the AFP take over would extract NT detectives from a role which would subject them to scrutiny and criticism as well as enable the Yuendumu community to have full confidence in the process, the MP said. "Just as happened during the COVID lockdown period, police officers from outside the NT can be brought in." Meanwhile, outspoken senator Lidia Thorpe said Friday marked five years since the global Black Lives Matter mobilisation sparked by the police killing of George Floyd in the US, with an officer's knee on his neck. "Kumanjayi White died the same way," she said in a statement on Thursday, citing an eyewitness account of the supermarket incident. "Since the Royal Commission into Aboriginal Deaths in Custody in 1991 at least 595 of our people have died in custody ... and not a single police or prison officer has ever been held criminally accountable," the senator said. On Wednesday evening, hundreds of people attended a candle-lit vigil outside the NT parliament in tribute to Mr White and to support his grieving desert community. A large banner stating "We stand with Yuendumu" was displayed in front of the parliament's entrance while another banner laid on the ground read "Justice for White". Organisers invited people to light candles or lay flowers following speeches highlighting the mistrust of police in Aboriginal communities and the need for an external inquiry into Mr White's death. Justice Not Jails spokesperson Jade Richie said "no police should be investigating police" in a death-in-custody case. Her group is organising a "national week of action" in response to Mr White's death, with vigils planned across the country. The Yuendumu community also lost 19-year-old Kumanjayi Walker in 2019 when he was fatally shot by then NT police officer Zachary Rolfe during a bungled arrest. Mr Rolfe was in 2022 found not guilty of all charges over the death. The Kumanjayi Walker coronial findings have been postponed until July 7 after Kumanjayi White's death in custody. Federal Indigenous Australians Minister Malarndirri McCarthy said on Thursday an independent death in custody probe might be warranted "in the interest of having some separation". 13YARN 13 92 76 Lifeline 13 11 14 beyondblue 1300 22 4636
9 News
3 days ago
- 9 News
Erin Patterson describes preparing mushroom lunch
Your web browser is no longer supported. To improve your experience update it here Erin Patterson has conceded she added foraged wild mushrooms and made "deviations" to a beef Wellington that would allegedly kill three of her former in-laws. The 50-year-old is giving evidence for a third day in her Supreme Court trial in regional Victoria. She has pleaded not guilty to three murders and one attempted murder over the July 2023 lunch she served to Don and Gail Patterson, 70, and Gail's sister Heather Wilkinson, 66. Accused killer Erin Patterson. (Anita Lester) All three died in hospital days after eating the meals, while Heather's husband Ian Wilkinson was the sole surviving lunch guest. Patterson, who maintains the poisonings were not deliberate, on Wednesday revealed the steps she took to make the beef Wellington dish. A majority of the ingredients were purchased from Woolworths, including mushrooms, eye fillet steaks, filo pastry, potato mash, green beans and puff pastry, she told the jury. Patterson made "deviations" to the RecipeTinEats recipe, including buying 10 beef tenderloin steaks after being unable to find a log of beef, swapping in filo pastry instead of making a crepe and omitting mustard and prosciutto because Ian didn't eat pork. She recalled starting quite early on the day of the lunch by frying up garlic and chopped shallots before adding two tubs of mushrooms she bought from Woolworths to make the duxelles, or the mushroom wrapping. "I cooked it down. I tasted it a few times. It seemed bland so I decided to add the mushrooms from the grocer I had in my pantry," she told a full court room and 14 jurors. Defence barrister Colin Mandy SC asked her to reflect on what may have been in the container of mushrooms from the pantry, which she said she bought from Melbourne. "Now I think that there was a possibility there were foraged ones in there as well," she responded. Don and Gail Patterson, victims of the suspected mushroom poisoning incident on July 29 in Leongatha, Victoria. (Supplied) Patterson previously said she began foraging for wild mushrooms during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 at Korumburra Botanic Gardens, on her three-acre (1.2ha) properties in Korumburra and Leongatha, and along a rail trail leading out of Leongatha. Mandy asked Patterson "do you accept there must have been death cap mushrooms" in the lunch she served to her former husband's family, to which she said yes. Patterson recalled making six beef Wellington parcels, ensuring they would be done and resting out of the oven by 12.30pm when her guests arrived. Plating up five beef Wellington dishes with mashed potatoes and green beans, the family sat at the table. Patterson recalled Ian, Don and Heather finishing their entire plates, Gail eating "quite a lot of hers, not all" which Don finished, and that she ate about a quarter to a third of her own plate. The sole survivor of the Leongatha mushroom poisoning lunch, pastor Ian Wilkinson arrives at court on May 6.. (Jason South) "I was talking a lot. I was eating slowly," she said. Her in-laws left because Ian had a meeting at his church and left Patterson to clean up the kitchen and put things away, admitting she had the rest of the cake Gail had brought. "I felt sick. I felt over-full. So I went to the toilet and brought it back up again," she said. Patterson recounted feeling a bit better, with only symptoms of loose stools that afternoon and evening. Her evidence will continue on Wednesday. Lines of people curious to catch a glimpse of Patterson giving evidence have stretched from the regional court's doors as the trial continues into its sixth week. LISTEN NOW: The Mushroom Trial: Say Grace is the latest podcast from Nine and The Age . Join journalists Penelope Liersch and Erin Pearson as they take listeners inside the case that's grabbed global headlines. You can listen on Apple here and Spotify here. Melbourne Victoria national Australia Trial courts CONTACT US Auto news:Is this the next Subaru WRX? Mysterious performance car teased.
The Advertiser
3 days ago
- The Advertiser
Erin Patterson describes preparing mushroom lunch
Erin Patterson has conceded she added foraged wild mushrooms and made "deviations" to a beef Wellington that would allegedly kill three of her former in-laws. The 50-year-old is giving evidence for a third day in her Supreme Court trial in regional Victoria. She has pleaded not guilty to three murders and one attempted murder over the July 2023 lunch she served to Don and Gail Patterson, 70, and Gail's sister Heather Wilkinson, 66. All three died in hospital days after eating the meals, while Heather's husband Ian Wilkinson was the sole surviving lunch guest. Patterson, who maintains the poisonings were not deliberate, on Wednesday revealed the steps she took to make the beef Wellington dish. A majority of the ingredients were purchased from Woolworths, including mushrooms, eye fillet steaks, filo pastry, potato mash, green beans and puff pastry, she told the jury. Patterson made "deviations" to the RecipeTinEats recipe, including buying 10 beef tenderloin steaks after being unable to find a log of beef, swapping in filo pastry instead of making a crepe and omitting mustard and prosciutto because Ian didn't eat pork. She recalled starting quite early on the day of the lunch by frying up garlic and chopped shallots before adding two tubs of mushrooms she bought from Woolworths to make the duxelles, or the mushroom wrapping. "I cooked it down. I tasted it a few times. It seemed bland so I decided to add the mushrooms from the grocer I had in my pantry," she told a full court room and 14 jurors. Defence barrister Colin Mandy SC asked her to reflect on what may have been in the container of mushrooms from the pantry, which she said she bought from Melbourne. "Now I think that there was a possibility there were foraged ones in there as well," she responded. Patterson previously said she began foraging for wild mushrooms during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 at Korumburra Botanic Gardens, on her three-acre (1.2ha) properties in Korumburra and Leongatha, and along a rail trail leading out of Leongatha. Mr Mandy asked Patterson "do you accept there must have been death cap mushrooms" in the lunch she served to her former husband's family, to which she said yes. Patterson recalled making six beef Wellington parcels, ensuring they would be done and resting out of the oven by 12.30pm when her guests arrived. Plating up five beef Wellington dishes with mashed potatoes and green beans, the family sat at the table. Patterson recalled Ian, Don and Heather finishing their entire plates, Gail eating "quite a lot of hers, not all" which Don finished, and that she ate about a quarter to a third of her own plate. "I was talking a lot. I was eating slowly," she said. Her in-laws left because Ian had a meeting at his church and left Patterson to clean up the kitchen and put things away, admitting she had the rest of the cake Gail had brought. "I felt sick. I felt over-full. So I went to the toilet and brought it back up again," she said. Patterson recounted feeling a bit better, with only symptoms of loose stools that afternoon and evening. Her evidence will continue on Wednesday. Lines of people curious to catch a glimpse of Patterson giving evidence have stretched from the regional court's doors as the trial continues into its sixth week. Erin Patterson has conceded she added foraged wild mushrooms and made "deviations" to a beef Wellington that would allegedly kill three of her former in-laws. The 50-year-old is giving evidence for a third day in her Supreme Court trial in regional Victoria. She has pleaded not guilty to three murders and one attempted murder over the July 2023 lunch she served to Don and Gail Patterson, 70, and Gail's sister Heather Wilkinson, 66. All three died in hospital days after eating the meals, while Heather's husband Ian Wilkinson was the sole surviving lunch guest. Patterson, who maintains the poisonings were not deliberate, on Wednesday revealed the steps she took to make the beef Wellington dish. A majority of the ingredients were purchased from Woolworths, including mushrooms, eye fillet steaks, filo pastry, potato mash, green beans and puff pastry, she told the jury. Patterson made "deviations" to the RecipeTinEats recipe, including buying 10 beef tenderloin steaks after being unable to find a log of beef, swapping in filo pastry instead of making a crepe and omitting mustard and prosciutto because Ian didn't eat pork. She recalled starting quite early on the day of the lunch by frying up garlic and chopped shallots before adding two tubs of mushrooms she bought from Woolworths to make the duxelles, or the mushroom wrapping. "I cooked it down. I tasted it a few times. It seemed bland so I decided to add the mushrooms from the grocer I had in my pantry," she told a full court room and 14 jurors. Defence barrister Colin Mandy SC asked her to reflect on what may have been in the container of mushrooms from the pantry, which she said she bought from Melbourne. "Now I think that there was a possibility there were foraged ones in there as well," she responded. Patterson previously said she began foraging for wild mushrooms during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 at Korumburra Botanic Gardens, on her three-acre (1.2ha) properties in Korumburra and Leongatha, and along a rail trail leading out of Leongatha. Mr Mandy asked Patterson "do you accept there must have been death cap mushrooms" in the lunch she served to her former husband's family, to which she said yes. Patterson recalled making six beef Wellington parcels, ensuring they would be done and resting out of the oven by 12.30pm when her guests arrived. Plating up five beef Wellington dishes with mashed potatoes and green beans, the family sat at the table. Patterson recalled Ian, Don and Heather finishing their entire plates, Gail eating "quite a lot of hers, not all" which Don finished, and that she ate about a quarter to a third of her own plate. "I was talking a lot. I was eating slowly," she said. Her in-laws left because Ian had a meeting at his church and left Patterson to clean up the kitchen and put things away, admitting she had the rest of the cake Gail had brought. "I felt sick. I felt over-full. So I went to the toilet and brought it back up again," she said. Patterson recounted feeling a bit better, with only symptoms of loose stools that afternoon and evening. Her evidence will continue on Wednesday. Lines of people curious to catch a glimpse of Patterson giving evidence have stretched from the regional court's doors as the trial continues into its sixth week. Erin Patterson has conceded she added foraged wild mushrooms and made "deviations" to a beef Wellington that would allegedly kill three of her former in-laws. The 50-year-old is giving evidence for a third day in her Supreme Court trial in regional Victoria. She has pleaded not guilty to three murders and one attempted murder over the July 2023 lunch she served to Don and Gail Patterson, 70, and Gail's sister Heather Wilkinson, 66. All three died in hospital days after eating the meals, while Heather's husband Ian Wilkinson was the sole surviving lunch guest. Patterson, who maintains the poisonings were not deliberate, on Wednesday revealed the steps she took to make the beef Wellington dish. A majority of the ingredients were purchased from Woolworths, including mushrooms, eye fillet steaks, filo pastry, potato mash, green beans and puff pastry, she told the jury. Patterson made "deviations" to the RecipeTinEats recipe, including buying 10 beef tenderloin steaks after being unable to find a log of beef, swapping in filo pastry instead of making a crepe and omitting mustard and prosciutto because Ian didn't eat pork. She recalled starting quite early on the day of the lunch by frying up garlic and chopped shallots before adding two tubs of mushrooms she bought from Woolworths to make the duxelles, or the mushroom wrapping. "I cooked it down. I tasted it a few times. It seemed bland so I decided to add the mushrooms from the grocer I had in my pantry," she told a full court room and 14 jurors. Defence barrister Colin Mandy SC asked her to reflect on what may have been in the container of mushrooms from the pantry, which she said she bought from Melbourne. "Now I think that there was a possibility there were foraged ones in there as well," she responded. Patterson previously said she began foraging for wild mushrooms during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 at Korumburra Botanic Gardens, on her three-acre (1.2ha) properties in Korumburra and Leongatha, and along a rail trail leading out of Leongatha. Mr Mandy asked Patterson "do you accept there must have been death cap mushrooms" in the lunch she served to her former husband's family, to which she said yes. Patterson recalled making six beef Wellington parcels, ensuring they would be done and resting out of the oven by 12.30pm when her guests arrived. Plating up five beef Wellington dishes with mashed potatoes and green beans, the family sat at the table. Patterson recalled Ian, Don and Heather finishing their entire plates, Gail eating "quite a lot of hers, not all" which Don finished, and that she ate about a quarter to a third of her own plate. "I was talking a lot. I was eating slowly," she said. Her in-laws left because Ian had a meeting at his church and left Patterson to clean up the kitchen and put things away, admitting she had the rest of the cake Gail had brought. "I felt sick. I felt over-full. So I went to the toilet and brought it back up again," she said. Patterson recounted feeling a bit better, with only symptoms of loose stools that afternoon and evening. Her evidence will continue on Wednesday. Lines of people curious to catch a glimpse of Patterson giving evidence have stretched from the regional court's doors as the trial continues into its sixth week. Erin Patterson has conceded she added foraged wild mushrooms and made "deviations" to a beef Wellington that would allegedly kill three of her former in-laws. The 50-year-old is giving evidence for a third day in her Supreme Court trial in regional Victoria. She has pleaded not guilty to three murders and one attempted murder over the July 2023 lunch she served to Don and Gail Patterson, 70, and Gail's sister Heather Wilkinson, 66. All three died in hospital days after eating the meals, while Heather's husband Ian Wilkinson was the sole surviving lunch guest. Patterson, who maintains the poisonings were not deliberate, on Wednesday revealed the steps she took to make the beef Wellington dish. A majority of the ingredients were purchased from Woolworths, including mushrooms, eye fillet steaks, filo pastry, potato mash, green beans and puff pastry, she told the jury. Patterson made "deviations" to the RecipeTinEats recipe, including buying 10 beef tenderloin steaks after being unable to find a log of beef, swapping in filo pastry instead of making a crepe and omitting mustard and prosciutto because Ian didn't eat pork. She recalled starting quite early on the day of the lunch by frying up garlic and chopped shallots before adding two tubs of mushrooms she bought from Woolworths to make the duxelles, or the mushroom wrapping. "I cooked it down. I tasted it a few times. It seemed bland so I decided to add the mushrooms from the grocer I had in my pantry," she told a full court room and 14 jurors. Defence barrister Colin Mandy SC asked her to reflect on what may have been in the container of mushrooms from the pantry, which she said she bought from Melbourne. "Now I think that there was a possibility there were foraged ones in there as well," she responded. Patterson previously said she began foraging for wild mushrooms during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 at Korumburra Botanic Gardens, on her three-acre (1.2ha) properties in Korumburra and Leongatha, and along a rail trail leading out of Leongatha. Mr Mandy asked Patterson "do you accept there must have been death cap mushrooms" in the lunch she served to her former husband's family, to which she said yes. Patterson recalled making six beef Wellington parcels, ensuring they would be done and resting out of the oven by 12.30pm when her guests arrived. Plating up five beef Wellington dishes with mashed potatoes and green beans, the family sat at the table. Patterson recalled Ian, Don and Heather finishing their entire plates, Gail eating "quite a lot of hers, not all" which Don finished, and that she ate about a quarter to a third of her own plate. "I was talking a lot. I was eating slowly," she said. Her in-laws left because Ian had a meeting at his church and left Patterson to clean up the kitchen and put things away, admitting she had the rest of the cake Gail had brought. "I felt sick. I felt over-full. So I went to the toilet and brought it back up again," she said. Patterson recounted feeling a bit better, with only symptoms of loose stools that afternoon and evening. Her evidence will continue on Wednesday. Lines of people curious to catch a glimpse of Patterson giving evidence have stretched from the regional court's doors as the trial continues into its sixth week.
