Gen Z Woman Refusing To Give Up Window Seat on Plane for Kid Backed
Based on facts, either observed and verified firsthand by the reporter, or reported and verified from knowledgeable sources.
Newsweek AI is in beta. Translations may contain inaccuracies—please refer to the original content.
A post about a woman's decision not to give her window seat to a child on a six-hour flight has gone viral on Reddit, igniting discussions about personal boundaries and the limits of courtesy in air travel.
The post, shared by u/melodyMyWoman, has received more than 9,200 upvotes and over 2,400 comments since it was posted on May 15.
Titled "AITA [Am I the A******] for not giving up my window seat on a 6-hour flight to a kid?," the post describes the woman's dilemma when she found another passenger sitting in her pre-booked window seat, hoping to swap so her child could enjoy the view.
"So, I (27F) recently took a 6-hour flight for a work conference. I booked my ticket two months in advance and paid extra for a window seat because I get a bit anxious on planes, and the view helps calm me down," she wrote. "I'm also pretty tall, and I like leaning against the window to sleep."
Upon boarding, she found a woman and her son, who appeared to be 7 or 8 years old, already seated in her assigned seat. When she explained it was hers, the woman asked if she would take the middle seat instead, saying it would "make a kid's day."
The poster "politely" declined, citing her anxiety and the extra money paid for the window. The mom eventually moved to her original seat two rows back but allegedly spent the rest of the flight glaring at the poster and criticizing her to other passengers.
Stock image: A woman smiles while looking out of a plane window.
Stock image: A woman smiles while looking out of a plane window.
Getty
Mandy Morris, a licensed professional counselor and executive psychology coach, told Newsweek that the poster's response was entirely appropriate. "She demonstrated self-awareness, communicated clearly, and held a boundary without being aggressive. That's not just OK; it's admirable," Morris said. "Kindness doesn't mean self-sacrifice, especially when the request infringes on someone's needs, planning, and emotional well-being."
Etiquette expert Lisa Mirza Grotts, the author of the book A Traveler's Passport to Etiquette in a Post-Pandemic World, echoed that view. "You are under zero obligation to give up the seat you selected and paid for, so why feel bad for doing something the right way?" she told Newsweek. "Poor planning is not your problem. Parents should book seats together. When they don't, it puts pressure on others to play musical chairs."
A June 2023 survey of 1,000 plane passengers in the U.S. and Canada, conducted on behalf of the travel booking website Kayak, found "you are allowed to ask to switch seats if you ask politely," because 54 percent of travelers "have a soft spot for common courtesy."
Those surveyed said you are allowed to ask to sit next to a family member, partner or friend because 58 percent of travelers "have a grain of empathy."
'Atrociously Rude'
Morris said that enforcing personal boundaries in public spaces is not selfishness. "Her response was calm, respectful, and firm. It's not rude to advocate for yourself," she added. She also noted that labeling someone as a bad person for maintaining their boundaries, especially in front of children, can be emotionally manipulative. "Part of raising emotionally healthy kids includes teaching them to handle disappointment."
Etiquette expert Jo Hayes told Newsweek that the poster has done "absolutely nothing wrong," adding, "this was your seat. You booked it months in advance—and paid extra, for the privilege of the window seat. It is rightfully yours."
Hayes criticized the other woman's "selfish, discourteous and disrespectful behavior," saying "it is entirely entitled—and atrociously rude—to brazenly take someone else's seat, and assume they'll be OK with it."
Hayes concluded that, if the mom wanted her child to enjoy a window seat, she should have done what the poster did and booked it.
Grotts said that flight attendants, not fellow passengers, are best positioned to manage such issues. "Flight attendants are trained mediators. They know the seating chart, they have access to options, and unlike you, they're not emotionally involved."
Reactions on Reddit overwhelmingly supported the original poster.
U/Anunez1412 wrote: "NTA [Not the a******]. But that other woman sure is. If she wanted a window seat for her son then she should've paid for one."
U/Gnarly_314 added: "The mother could have been nice and not stressed you out. Her child didn't get a window seat because she didn't pay for one. She and her child should suck it up."
Several Reddit users agreed that the poster didn't owe any explanation at all. U/Britneyismyhomegirl posted: "No way, even providing an excuse or explanation is playing into that woman's game. Just a flat out no is fine."
Newsweek has contacted the original poster for comment via the Reddit messaging system.
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