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‘I Don't Understand You' Review: Murder and Mayhem in Italy

‘I Don't Understand You' Review: Murder and Mayhem in Italy

New York Times05-06-2025
Dolly Parton has often joked that gay people deserve the right to legally marry and 'suffer just like us heterosexuals.' That cheeky spirit of equal-opportunity relationship struggles underpins the film 'I Don't Understand You.'
Written and directed by real-life husbands David Joseph Craig and Brian Crano, the film follows dads-to-be Dom (Nick Kroll) and Cole (Andrew Rannells) as they make a series of disastrously wrong turns during an anniversary trip to rural Italy that could threaten their chances of adopting a child. Intercultural misunderstandings lead to chaos and eventual bloodshed. If only they'd done their homework before boarding the plane.
Like the unhinged 2023 gay comedy 'Down Low,' this movie uses accidental murder as a darkly comic device. Lines like 'What's my hair doing?' and 'I don't want to break her stemware' — uttered after serious transgressions — land with snappy comedic timing. But this plays like a bloated 'Saturday Night Live' sketch, the increasingly implausible plot getting out of step with a sincere story about queer parenthood. In trying to be both subversive and sincere, 'I Don't Understand You' ends up not quite pulling off either.
One recurring idea is that Dom and Cole may fear homophobia more than they actually encounter it — self-preservation is their sharpest weapon. Even if they don't realize it, their suffering isn't because they're gay. The couple is suffering because, unlike in queer films of decades past, they actually have the freedom to screw things up.
I Don't Understand YouRated R for murderous farce and meltdown-level expletives. Running time: 1 hour 36 minutes. In theaters.
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