National Parents Day 2025: Psychiatrist reveals ways for parents and children to understand each other better and bond

Hindustan Times

17 hours ago

National Parents Day 2025: This year, July 27 marks National Parents Day. It is observed to celebrate the constant love, support, and guidance that parents offer throughout their children's lives. On this occasion, let's take a closer look at how parents and children can understand each other and communicate better. Better communication between parents and children helps in reducing conflicts and understanding each other better. (Shutterstock)
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Often, parents and children aren't on the same page. From loudly slamming doors to frustrated yelling of 'Why don't you get me?', the gap between generations can sometimes feel too wide to bridge. While both children and parents navigate their own problems in life, they often turn a blind eye to each other's struggles, unintentionally widening the emotional distance. This is why a powerful way to make a supportive environment at home is to understand each other's perspectives. HT Lifestyle reached out to a psychiatrist to explore how parents and children can understand each other.
Understanding each other's perspectives
Understanding each other creates a cooperative environment at home.(Shutterstock)
Dr Ajit Dandekar, head of mental health (psychiatry and psychology) at Nanavati Max Super Speciality Hospital in Mumbai, shared three behavioural approaches for parents. He said, 'Keep it simple, start with respect, aim for understanding before instructions, and focus on effort rather than criticism. Those three shifts alone can transform everyday conversations at home.'
What can parents do to understand their children better?
Further, Dr Dandekar listed six things parents can do to understand their children better, covering all the essentials, from conversation hacks to emotional regulation:
Listen to decode, not to dismiss: Children rarely say things 'straight,' their feelings are often wrapped in stories or behaviour. Reflect back what you hear ('It sounds like you're really frustrated about…') so they feel seen, not judged. Validate feelings before giving advice: Start with, 'I get why that hurt/was scary' before you instruct or correct. Validation lowers emotional intensity and opens the door to problem-solving. Use an 'emotional mirror': Name the emotion you observe—'You seem angry and let down'—without lecturing. Accurate reflection helps children identify, regulate, and eventually change their own responses. Avoid comparisons, blaming and labels: Comparing siblings, calling a child 'lazy', or stonewalling shuts communication down. Praise effort, strategies and progress, not personality traits—this builds resilience and a growth mindset. Co-create boundaries and routines: Invite children to help set a few clear rules and predictable routines. Shared ownership increases cooperation and reduces daily power struggles. Repair quickly after ruptures: If you've overreacted, apologise and restate the goal calmly. Modelling accountability teaches children how to repair relationships, too. Be curious, not controlling: Ask open questions ('What made today tough?') instead of rapid-fire instructions. Curiosity communicates respect and keeps the conversation two-way, not two parallel monologues.
What can children do to understand their parents better?
It's easy to blame parents and say 'they just don't get it', but they are human too. Commonly, children see them only through the lens of their role as 'parents,' forgetting they, too, have their own pressures and emotions. Understanding goes both ways.
Dr Dandekar listed out three things for children to understand their parents' pov:
Acknowledge effort and limits: Parents juggle finances, work, and care. Noticing their effort ('Thanks for trying to make time today') softens conflict and builds mutual empathy. Say what you feel and what you need: Use clear 'I' statements—'I felt ignored when…' and 'I need 10 minutes to explain…'—instead of withdrawing or shouting. Join the solution: Offer ideas, accept reasonable boundaries and follow agreed-upon routines. Collaboration shows maturity and earns trust.
Keeping indoors clean and safe
An unwashed pillowcase carries a lot of germs and bacteria.(Shutterstock)
The physical environment also shapes mood in more ways than one. So while emotional connection is the foundation of a healthy parent-child relationship, it's equally important for parents to ensure that children are comfortable and in a safe, clean space. Weighing in on this, Nathan Lawson McLean, Design Engineer at Dyson, shared the importance of a cleaning routine and maintaining a safe indoor air quality.
'Many parents assume that staying indoors protects their families from pollution, but indoor air can often be more polluted than outdoor air due to sources like cooking, cleaning agents, furniture, and even dust mites,' Nathan explained. 'Areas such as mattresses, pillows, curtains, fabric covers, and soft toys are frequently overlooked during cleaning, yet they can harbour dust, allergens, bacteria, and even microscopic particles that linger for months."
Nathan further quoted a recent study, which revealed that an unwashed pillowcase, when left unwashed for even just a week, can collect millions of bacteria, becoming a significant risk to children's health and overall well-being.
To prevent the risk of falling sick, Nathan suggested, 'Regular vacuuming of these surfaces, especially mattresses and other high-contact areas, is essential to minimise exposure to harmful particles. Pairing this with proper ventilation helps reduce the buildup of pollutants and ensures fresher, cleaner air for your little ones. Babies spend so much of their time sleeping, and creating a serene, clean sleep environment not only supports their growth and development but also provides peace of mind for parents."
Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your doctor with any questions about a medical condition.