Six science-backed strategies for winning over your toughest critics
And yet, after studying human behavior for many years, I am fully aware that the tendency to indulge in this self-enhancing habit is intellectually debilitating: while it feels nice to hang out with people who appreciate you, it is also a way to develop blind spots and ignore opportunities to get better, improve, and develop new skills and ideas.
Montaigne warned of this in his Essays, cautioning against surrounding oneself with flattering mirrors that reflect only our vanity, not our flaws. Shakespeare dramatizes this danger repeatedly—think of King Lear, who banishes the only daughter who speaks honestly, choosing instead the empty praise of those who tell him what he wants to hear. In The Iliad, Achilles withdraws from battle in part because his ego isn't sufficiently stroked, with devastating consequences. And Orwell, in 1984, shows us a world where intellectual isolation—being surrounded by only one narrative—becomes the ultimate mechanism of control.
Growing Divided
Beyond the personal level, this habit fuels tribalism and polarization: when we curate our social and intellectual circles to exclude dissent or difference, we don't just grow more complacent—we grow more divided. What begins as a harmless preference for affirmation becomes a breeding ground for intellectual stagnation and collective delusion.
Conversely, increasing the time you spend with people who don't like or value you, particularly when they think different from you, may sound like a masochistic activity, but it can reveal important gaps between the person you are and who you would like to be. Indeed, even when people underestimate you, they can be an important source of negative or critical feedback that alerts you to the possibility that you may actually not be as good as you think—and especially not as good as your inner circle thinks. This is an essential ingredient of self-awareness: coming to terms with your limitations, knowing what you don't know, and accepting the fact that other people may not see you as positively as you see yourself, or as your close friends and fans do.
But first, let's understand the likely reasons other people may underestimate you:
1) It is a way to protect their own self-esteem
Bringing other people down is the most common way to feel good about yourself (pathetic, I know—but very human). This phenomenon is often referred to as the Crab Barrel Syndrome, the psychological process where individuals attempt to hinder the progress of others perceived as competitors. When people feel threatened, envious, or insecure, they often cope by diminishing the value of others. It's less effortful than self-improvement and more immediately gratifying. So, when someone underestimates you, it may say more about their fragile ego than your actual potential. In other words, their low opinion of your talents might just be a defense mechanism they're using to avoid facing their own inadequacies—a mix of jealousy, insecure narcissism, and self-pity that is expressed as a derogatory view of you.
In Joseph Mankiewicz's All About Eve, the aging stage actress Margo Channing becomes increasingly threatened by the seemingly innocent and adoring Eve Harrington, a young fan who slowly infiltrates her life and career. Margo's initial condescension gives way to paranoia and defensiveness, while Eve's ascent is lubricated by subtle manipulation and strategic modesty. Here, the envy runs in both directions—Eve envies Margo's fame and legacy; Margo resents Eve's youth and promise. Each woman underestimates the other as a means of preserving her own sense of value, which makes the film a masterclass in how admiration curdles into rivalry when identity feels fragile.
2) You may actually be a high performer—but surrounded by other high performers
If you're consistently underestimated despite strong output, consider the context. Being in an environment full of exceptional people—like elite academic programs, competitive companies, or high-performing teams—can distort perceptions. Just watch Damien Chazelle's Whiplash, where gifted jazz drummer Andrew Neiman is pushed to his limits at a prestigious music conservatory. In that hypercompetitive setting, even brilliance isn't enough—every success is met with silence or scorn, because greatness is simply expected. When excellence becomes the baseline, even impressive contributions may be overlooked. Meanwhile, others who are objectively less capable may shine simply because they operate in low-stakes environments where mediocrity passes for brilliance, and enjoy being a big fish in a small pond. So being underestimated may be a function of your high-performing context, not your low ability.
3) You may not be as good as you think
Self-enhancement bias is real. Research shows that most people overestimate their abilities, especially in ambiguous domains. Even if you're talented, that doesn't guarantee you're making your value visible. Are you communicating clearly, aligning your work with others' goals, or just expecting people to 'get it'? Being underestimated might be your cue to refine how you showcase your strengths—clarify your contributions, seek feedback, and build a brand that matches your actual impact. (And yes, that means leaving the Dunning-Kruger zone.)
So, what are the best strategies for winning your critics over?
1) Focus on them, not you
Dale Carnegie 101: take a genuine interest in others. The irony is that people who underestimate you often care more about being seen than about seeing you. So, just play the game: ask them about their work, their opinions, their ideas— convincingly faking appreciation for them. Make them feel important. To be sure, flattery works best when it's believable, which means you need to pay attention, listen, and reflect their values back to them. Call it effective impression management, strategic empathy, or just good politics: contrary to popular belief, it's one of the key ingredients of career success.
2) Quantify your achievements
People are less likely to ignore results when they're staring at hard numbers. Share outcomes, metrics, and results that demonstrate your impact. Be specific: revenue increased, error rates decreased, engagement improved. You don't have to brag—just document. Some people may still dismiss the data because they favor charisma over competence, but those aren't the people you should be trying to impress anyway. Let the results speak, and if they don't listen, speak louder with your results.
3) Change your behavior
Maybe they're right. Or at least not entirely wrong. Being underestimated can be a gift disguised as insult: a wake-up call that motivates you to adapt, grow, and become harder to ignore. If you've been coasting, this is your cue to sprint. If you've been misaligned, recalibrate. The good news is that people revise their judgments when they see genuine effort and improvement. There's nothing more satisfying than disproving someone's low expectations—especially when you do it without gloating (at least not outwardly).
A final consideration: at times, the most effective way to win over the people who underestimate you may require you to care less about whether you actually win them over—especially if your goal is merely to inflate your ego. Focus instead on learning from them. Just as failure is a better teacher than success, critics and adversaries often teach us more than friends and fans. Nietzsche, for instance, argued that we owe our greatest growth to resistance and struggle, not comfort: 'What does not kill me makes me stronger' is not just a gym slogan, but a blueprint for character development. Similarly, in The Republic, Plato has Socrates sharpen his thinking through constant dialectical combat with hostile interlocutors—because truth, like steel, is forged through friction. Even in literature, consider Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice: it is precisely through misunderstanding, misjudgment, and critical feedback that Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy evolve into better versions of themselves.
In the end, you cannot expect everybody to appreciate your talents—but those who don't may be more valuable than your supporters. Their underestimation can sting, yes, but it also serves as a psychological spur to refine, improve, and prove—not just to them, but to yourself—what you're truly capable of becoming.
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CNN
27 minutes ago
- CNN
We tested 8 of the best kitchen knife sets, and only 3 are worth it
The best kitchen knife sets we tested Best kitchen knife set: Zwilling J.A. Henckels Pro 7-Piece Knife Block Set Best budget kitchen knife set: Cuisinart Triple Rivet 15-Piece Knife Block Set Best starter kitchen knife set: Cutluxe Artisan Series 8-Piece Knife Block Set High-quality, supersharp kitchen knives can make culinary tasks easier and safer. Although most home cooks would fare fine owning basic serrated, chef's and paring knives, investing in one of the best kitchen knife sets offers a higher level of versatility to meal-making. Many of these sets are housed neatly in a handsome knife block and provide serious joy for real cooking nerds. But it's important to invest in the right kitchen knife set for your needs and cooking preferences. And since dull knives are more dangerous than sharp ones, we recommend buying a quality knife sharpener too. To help you choose the best, we spent several weeks testing eight top-rated kitchen knife sets. We loaded our cutting board with fruit, veggies, herbs, bread, meat and cheese and chopped, diced and sliced them all to see which blades performed best. In the end, we found three winners any home chef would find to be … er … a cut above the rest. A post shared by CNN Underscored (@cnnunderscored) Zwilling J.A. Henckels Pro 7-Piece Knife Block Set We found the knives in the Zwilling J.A. Henckels Pro Seven-Piece Knife Block Set to be super sharp and durable during testing. They feature ergonomic handles that make slicing and dicing easy. We think these high-quality knives will last a lifetime and suggest you give this kitchen knife set a good look. Cuisinart Triple Rivet 15-Piece Knife Block Set This 15-piece set from Cuisinart is a well-rounded knife set that delivers extremely sharp blades right out of the box, comes with an attractive light-shaded wood block and has a budget-friendly price tag. Cutluxe Artisan Series 8-Piece Knife Block Set The sharpness of this heavy-duty set takes a slight dip compared to our top pick. Still, it's a comprehensive, durable arsenal well-suited for casual to experienced cooks starting a kitchen from scratch. If you're in the market for a set of kitchen knives that are sharp, ergonomic and able to last a lifetime, look no further than this set from Zwilling. It comes with an 8-inch chef's knife, a 4-inch paring knife, a 5.5-inch prep knife and an 8-inch bread knife, as well as shears, a sharpening steel and a 16-slot hardwood bamboo block. Each piece received excellent scores on performance and quality during our tests. One of our favorites in the set was the chef's knife, which uses a wide curved blade that allowed it to effortlessly rock back and forth to mince parsley or garlic or slice onions without lifting the blade off the cutting board between cuts. With an ultra-sharp edge, it rarely required any pressure to cut through whatever we threw at it, and we could nearly drop an entire head of lettuce right through the blade. The chef's knife is typically the most used in a home cook's block, so the fact that this was the best piece in the set shows that Zwilling understands its importance. The block also comes with a four-inch paring knife, which was bigger than most others in our testing pool. The height of the blade seemed quite significant in our hand, nearly twice the width of other paring knives. We thought it was more like a smaller chef's knife. The chunky blade, while sharp, made it hard to do things like hull a strawberry or core a tomato, and it didn't work well for removing the peel from an apple or a potato. It did, however, work better than any of the smaller paring knives in our product pool for chopping smaller foods like garlic or shallots. We did enjoy the utility knife, which sliced cheese and salami with ease, and we found that the serrated knife swiftly cut through angel food cake and a loaf of crusty French bread. Each of the knives in this set is designed with a sloped bolster so users can achieve what's called the 'professional pinch grip,' where the thumb and index finger rest on either side of the blade to provide improved control while cutting. We liked this design choice and found that it made the knives more comfortable when chopping and slicing onions and carrots, and when mincing parsley. Buying a quality set of kitchen knives doesn't mean you have to spend hundreds of dollars, and this 15-piece set from Cuisinart is the perfect example of why. Priced at $130 (but often on sale for less than $100), it offers incredible value for at-home chefs of any skill level. The fact that it also comes in a wood block that looks good on any kitchen counter is a massive plus. CNN Underscored's senior testing editor, Rick Stella, tested this set in his kitchen for several months and walked away so impressed that he heavily considered pitching it not just as the best budget pick but as the best overall kitchen knife set. That idea faded after some side-by-side comparison to the Zwilling set, but the fact remains that this is an excellent set of knives for any kind of at-home chef. What particularly stood out to Stella was just how sharp the knives were right out of the box. They were so sharp that even a small nick from the side of the chef's blade was enough to cut his finger. The cut was nothing serious, but it did prove just how honed the blades were. He also appreciated that the set came with six steak knives. These are often the first things left off many kitchen knife sets, but Stella said that it's something that comes in handy when entertaining guests. These were also quite sharp and have held up to repeated (sometimes daily) use for several months. There's also something to be said about the overall design and aesthetic. Each knife (and the shears) has a pleasant white handle with silver accents that pulls off an elevated style. To top it off, everything is housed in a beautiful light-colored wood block that would look good in almost anyone's kitchen. For those who prefer it, the set is also available in black, with the handles of the knives and shears black and the wood block sporting a black 'Cuisinart' badge. If you're shopping for a kitchen knife set that won't break the bank and also won't be an eyesore, this set from Cuisinart is what you seek. A knife set priced over $300 can be a tough ask for someone just looking to stock their kitchen with the essentials. At half that price, the Cutluxe Artisan Series Eight-Piece Knife Block Set provides a hefty starting kit that feels solid, performs well and looks more expensive than it is. It wasn't the cheapest set we tested, but it was the best bang-for-your-buck standout. Housed in a massive acacia wood block, the Cutluxe set includes a 3.5-inch paring knife, 5-inch utility knife, 5-inch serrated knife, 7-inch Santoku knife, 8-inch chef's knife, 9-inch carving knife, 10-inch serrated bread knife and a honing rod. It's a gamut of blades that never really felt lacking, as the utility knife, sized between the paring and chef's knives, made it easy to specify roles. If one thing was missing, it was a pair of shears. The Cutluxe knives are heavier and bigger than our top set from Zwilling. Take the paring knife, for example: The Cutluxe lands at 4.9 ounces on the scale, while the Zwilling weighs in at 2.9 ounces. And it's obvious just by looking at them, as the handles on the Cutluxe knives are far bulkier. The size didn't bother us during testing, though home chefs with small hands might feel like they're wielding a small sword when breaking out the carving knife. Associate testing writer Joe Bloss deployed this Cutluxe set in his kitchen for months to assess how it performed and how severely its knives dulled over time. A significant decrease in sharpness was never detected. Though they didn't slice through ingredients with the buttery smoothness of our favorite knives and more expensive options, the blades of high-carbon German steel performed well. Casual cooks are the target here; serious home chefs are likely better off reaching deeper into their budget for sharper knives. Looks weren't the primary focus of our testing, but there's no denying that Cutluxe's woodblock stands out among the pool of candidates. It's huge — 13.1 by 2.3 by 16.1 inches when filled — and makes for a countertop statement piece. If you plan on stashing it beneath a cabinet, ensure you have plenty of clearance for removing and replacing the knives. Cutluxe backs this set (and its smaller five- and seven-piece sets) with a lifetime warranty against material and workmanship defects. That confidence means something when you're shopping in this price tier. We spent several weeks testing eight kitchen knife sets, comparing each model using the same criteria, including overall performance, build quality, added accessories and warranty. We also took detailed notes on how specific knives functioned, based on everything from sharpness and materials to heft and hand feel. In some cases, we ordered two of each set so that after spending several days slicing and dicing our hearts out, we could compare the used knives' sharpness to their just-out-of-the-box twins. Here's everything we considered while testing. Performance Chef's knife: This standard tool is made to take on most of the bigger jobs in the kitchen. Its weight makes it easier to chop loads of ingredients in one go, say, for a big pot of soup or to roast a bounty of potatoes and other vegetables. We tested chopping through meat, tomatoes, onions, carrots, herbs and more, noting the knife's design, grip, weight and general feel, and then we noted the ease of drawing the blade through the various food items. Paring knife: A paring knife needs to be nimble and precise, and feel good in the hand. So, for this knife, we cored and peeled apples and tomatoes, then minced shallots and garlic to evaluate its performance and feel. Utility knife: These knives are made to take on all the random jobs that no other knife feels right for — the chef's knife is too big, the paring knife too small. Too many items to list, including tomatoes, cheddar cheese, oranges and salami, were used to test how easily this knife could live up to its name. Serrated knife: Serrated knives are made to cut through things you can't press down and through easily, like crusty baguettes, angel food cakes and cantaloupes. We looked at the ease of cutting through these difficult foods, as well as how thin we could slice something softer, such as a tomato. Build quality and design Quality: We took into account the quality of materials, including blade and handle construction. Feel: So much of handling a kitchen knife depends on how it feels in your hand, so we paid special attention to the weight of the blades and handles, maneuverability, weight distribution and ease of sliding the knives in and out of their blocks. Knuckle clearance: Not all knife handles are created equal, so we measured whether or not our knuckles or fingers hit the cutting board while chopping. General looks: Aesthetics are important, especially for utensils that will sit out on your countertop 24/7. While we realize taste is subjective, we noted our general reactions to how nice they looked. Accessories and warranty Items and their usefulness: Some sets were very simple with just a few items, while others included a full array of steak knives, shears, honing steels, boning knives, slicers and more. We looked at what was offered and how useful those items were. Limited or lifetime warranty: Stuff happens, so we noted warranty information. (Most had limited lifetime warranties.) Forged or stamped Knife blades are either forged or stamped from steel. Forged blades are hammered out of molten metal, while stamped blades are punched out of a large sheet of steel. In general, forged blades are sturdier, are easier to control and hold an edge longer. Between the handle and the blade, they have a bolster, which is a band of metal that strengthens the knife, helps to balance it and protects your hand. Forged knives have a full tang, which means the blade runs through the handle. When you use a forged knife, you can sense that the handle controls the knife. But you will find it heavier to hold, less flexible and more expensive. You may feel a stamped blade is more comfortable to hold and maneuver, especially for tasks like peeling an apple, coring a tomato or working around bones. Choose your style Western-style knives are thick and heavy, as they originated in Europe where cooks prepare a lot of root vegetables and large cuts of meat. They often have a curved blade to make it easy to rock back and forth when cutting and mincing. Asian knives, which were designed to cut fish and make precise cuts, are lighter and thinner, and have blades with a smaller angle. While they're comfortable to work with, they're more delicate and must be handled carefully. Don't even think of using one to hack through a butternut squash or the backbone of a chicken. Comfort You're the one who's going to be using the knives, so it's important that they feel comfortable in your hand, especially if you're going to be chopping and slicing large quantities in one session. Factors like the size of your hand, the type of grip you use and what food you prepare will affect your preference. When you pick up a knife, it should rest comfortably in your palm or between your fingers if you use a pinch grip. The knife should be balanced, meaning neither the handle nor the blade is heavier than the other. Pick up the knife and grip it lightly where the blade meets the handle to see if it will seesaw. A balanced knife will remain level in your hand, while an unbalanced one will teeter down on one side, indicating either the handle or the blade is heavier. A well-balanced knife reduces hand fatigue, especially when cutting a mountain of vegetables, and gives good control, which is especially important when you want to cut precisely, let's say to turn carrots into matchsticks or onions into little cubes. Safe, accessible storage A storage block that sits on your countertop is handy for keeping your knives accessible as well as protecting their blades from being dulled or nicked in a drawer or accidentally cutting you as you reach for them. However, a block eats up counter space and isn't always aesthetically pleasing, especially if it's branded with the manufacturer's name. Blocks designed so that the knife handles point toward you make it easy to grab the one you want but aren't compact. Slim blocks that sit at the back of the counter are less obtrusive but make it harder to remove a knife, as you have to lift them straight up and may have to move the block forward. If you buy knives without a block, we urge you to buy an in-drawer storage organizer like this bamboo one. Another space-saving option is to install a magnetic strip on the wall. But keep in mind that to remove a knife, you either have to lift it straight up or use some force. Don't ignore sharpening We can't say it enough: Nothing is more important than keeping your knives sharp. The most well-balanced, comfortable-to-hold, sharpest-out-of-the-box knives are useless once their blades get dull. If you aren't diligent about sharpening, it doesn't pay to spend much on a knife set. Over time, you'll feel your knives getting duller, so when they no longer easily pierce the skin of a tomato or slice through a sheet of paper, it's time to sharpen the blades. Depending on how much you use your knives, you'll need to sharpen them anywhere from once a month to once a year. We recommend you invest in a handheld, or even better, an electric sharpener that holds a blade at a fixed angle as you pull it through the mechanism, and use it regularly. You can't rely on a butcher's or honing steel to maintain your blade. Caraway 5-Piece Stainless Steel Knife Set This knife set from Caraway is a beautiful five-piece collection that feels good in hand, is incredibly sharp out of the box and comes in six stylish color options. It is a bit spendy, though, and it doesn't come with a block to store any of the knives. We've long been fans of Caraway's kitchen tools here at CNN Underscored, and the same can be said for this five-piece knife set. Though it is expensive at $275 for four knives and a pair of shears, it does prove its worth by offering sharp blades and a gorgeous design. They also perform extremely well, no matter if you're slicing tomatoes, chopping garlic or cutting up some berries. We also appreciated that the set is available in six eye-catching colors, which can match a diverse array of kitchen aesthetics (or other Caraway products if you have them). The quality is top-notch here — if you have the budget. Cutluxe 15-Piece Knife Block Set This Cutluxe 15-Piece Knife Block Set is a great alternative to the eight-piece Cutluxe Artisan Series collection above. It doesn't come with the same premium Acacia wood block (this one's walnut), but it does have more knives and costs less. Although we deemed the Cutluxe Artisan Series eight-piece set as the best kitchen knife set for beginners, this other collection from Cutluxe came in a close second. First, it's a bit less expensive, albeit the quality is not as high, especially when it comes to the wooden knife block. But if you just want to stock an empty kitchen, that's a fine trade-off. This set is durably built and the knives feel solid and weighty in hand. They proved to be ultra-sharp right after we unboxed them too, and they stayed perfectly sharp throughout testing. This set was also in the running for best budget knife set (and it was close), but since the Cuisinart block costs less, we chose that one instead. Hedley & Bennett Chef's Knife Set One of our favorite sets in terms of weight and feel, this trio of chef's knives from Hedley & Bennett is made of Japanese steel and backed by a lifetime guarantee. It nails the basics at a better price than others of the same size too. Our most recent round of testing placed a lot of knives in Bloss' kitchen. and after evaluations, these were the ones he continued to reach for most often. Ergonomic and balanced, Hedley & Bennett's lightweight blades feel almost custom-made in the hand. The weight and size are just right, and they cut through veggies, meats and breads with terrific sharpness. Hedley & Bennett's set features just three blades: a 5.5-inch paring knife, an 8.6-inch serrated bread knife and an 8-inch chef's knife. We didn't award it a winning spot because it's not as fully loaded as other sets with additional knives, but this trio is a rock-solid foundation that the solo chef will rarely need to go beyond. At this price, unfortunately, it doesn't include storage, though you can bundle the brand's magnetic stand for a final cost of $260. Brabantia Drawer Knife Block Plus Knives Encased in a flat block, this drawer-friendly set felt cheap because of its plastic grips. If the ideal weight and feel of a perfect knife inspires confidence in the kitchen, the flimsy plastic grip on this trio did the opposite in our latest round of testing. Don't get it twisted: They performed decently, cutting through bread with zero issues. But this set, which doesn't include a paring knife, felt more like a backup plan to stash away in a drawer than the kitchen staples that never take a break. Brabantia, however, does support its longevity with a five-year warranty. Schmidt Bros. Bonded Ash 7-Piece Kitchen Knife Set Blade performance is adequate with this knife set, though you're likely better off opting for one of Schmidt Bros.' more inexpensive handle materials. Schmidt Bros. has such an expansive collection of knife sets that it was hard to zero in on the best fit for our testing. We landed on this seven-piece set complete with a 4-inch paring knife, 7.5-inch santoku knife, 6-inch utility knife, 8-inch chef's knife, 8.5-inch slicer knife and 8.5-inch bread knife with a magnetic stand. The ash handles on each look handsome and feel comfortable to hold, though knuckle clearance was a bit tight during use. Ultimately, this set was only average in performance while being priced close to our top pick. It could be a better buy in other finishes at lower prices, but in this variant, you're much better off with the elite performance from Zwilling. How many knives come in a kitchen knife set? How many knives come in a kitchen knife set? Sets can consist of as few as three knives or as many as 20 pieces, including an assortment of knives, a butcher's steel, shears, steak knives and a storage block. Don't automatically assume more pieces are better, though. The bigger the set, the more room it requires in a kitchen drawer or on a countertop. What kind of knives do I really need? What kind of knives do I really need? A utility knife, which is a little longer than a paring knife, and shears are items you're likely to use often. Santokus are all-purpose knives that are nice to have, especially for slicing. But you may never use a boning knife, and we consider a sharpening steel of minimal benefit. Ultimately, consider the included tools that come in a certain set and whether or not you need them. What are high-quality kitchen knives made from? What are high-quality kitchen knives made from? Virtually all high-quality knives are made from high-carbon stainless steel. The carbon makes them easy to sharpen and helps them keep their edges while the stainless prevents discoloration and rusting. CNN Underscored thoroughly tests the products in our testing guides and provides full transparency about how we test them. We have a skilled team of writers and editors who have many years of testing experience and ensure each article is carefully edited and products are properly vetted. We talk to top experts when relevant to make certain we are testing each product accurately, recommending only the best products and considering the pros and cons of each item. For this article, associate testing writer Joe Bloss, senior testing editor Rick Stella and contributing writers Lesley Kennedy and Sharon Franke put each knife set through several cutting assignments in their kitchen. You should have seen the amount of knife blocks built up in their homes. Bloss, author of this guide's most recent update, is a seasoned product tester across various categories in the home and kitchen, including coffee makers and men's razors.
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