
Pussycat Dolls icon reveals startling details of drug addiction for first time
The hidden struggle that began in her teenage years and shadowed her rise to global pop fame.
Now 42, the pop star described how her addiction to the anti-anxiety medication Xanax began during high school, part of a long trajectory of self-soothing with substances.
Even as a child, she turned to over-the-counter sleep aids like NyQuil. In adulthood, Lexapro followed, and then Xanax became a near-daily crutch.
'I was so young and I didn't have the knowledge I have now,' Roberts reflected in a new interview with The Times.
'Xanax is addictive. For me, for decades I was just leaning on what I could get to help me crash out. My brain just wouldn't shut off and my anxiety was too intense.'
Discovered in Los Angeles by Pussycat Dolls founder Robin Antin, she joined the group in 2003 at just 22. Their 2005 debut album PCD became a multi-platinum global hit, propelling them onto a relentless international tour schedule.
'There were no discussions around, 'How is your mental health?'' Roberts said. 'I remember once we were in three countries in one day. Eventually, my body just got to the point of shutdown. I was really, really sick.'
The breaking point came in London, nearly five years after the band's meteoric rise.
Roberts was admitted to hospital with suspected neurological damage and medics feared she'd suffered a brain aneurysm. It was later diagnosed as extreme stress, exhaustion, and burnout, worsened by chronic sleep deprivation, poor nutrition, and unmanaged anxiety.
Despite the crisis, she remained locked into performance-mode: 'I remember saying [in the hospital], 'I need to get on a flight to Germany. I've got a show to do. You gotta give me something.' That was the mentality.'
When she finally left the group in 2010, Roberts's body was in turmoil: she had shingles across her face, eczema covering her legs, a stomach ulcer, and a collapsed immune system. More Trending
'An acupuncturist told me then, 'If you don't scream, your body's gonna scream for you,'' she recalled.
While Roberts avoids placing blame directly on the male-dominated music industry, her story lays bare the punishing realities of commercial pop at the time – a culture that encouraged silence, competition, and constant productivity.
'There was also this feeling that we could be replaced in some way,' she said, 'But also there was my own drive, growing up as a dance competitor. So it was a combination of the two.'
Now living a more grounded life, Roberts credits breathwork (a therapeutic practice of conscious breathing) with helping her finally break free from dependency and reconnect with her body.
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Daily Mail
7 hours ago
- Daily Mail
Where are the Pussycat Dolls now? As Ashley Roberts speaks out on her struggles during her girl group years, a look at the very different lives of her bandmates
They were the ultimate girl group who took the pop world by storm in the early 2000's. But in 2010, the Pussycat Dolls officially disbanded, and plans for a reunion tour in 2020 were ruined by the Covid-19 pandemic. This week, original member Ashley Roberts opened up about her struggles during her time in the iconic girl band. Explaining how ill she got due to stress, the star admitted health professionals feared she had a brain aneurysm after a severe bout of sickness and headaches. Since quitting the band, Ashley has moved away from music and has become a successful showbiz correspondent. Fellow members Nicole Scherzinger, Melody Thornton, Carmit Bachar, Jessica Sutta and Kimberly Wyatt have also embarked on solo careers, from appearing on reality TV shows to winning Tony Awards. Ashley Roberts Since leaving the band, Ashley appeared on several reality TV shows, including I'm a Me Out of Here!, The Jump, and Strictly Come Dancing. In 2019, Ashley became the showbiz correspondent for the national Heart Breakfast radio show. Since 2022, she has been a presenter for Heart 00s, a spin-off from the Heart radio network. Ashley, 43, is now in a relationship with boyfriend George Rollinson, 25, who is an artist and has created elaborate pieces for the likes of celebrity clients Drake and Anthony Joshua. Last year, Ashley gushed to MailOnline that she was in a 'happy place' and said: 'It's really nice to be in a relationship that's kind and thoughtful and supportive and we have fun'. Despite being part of the iconic girl band, behind the scenes Ashely paid the price for trying to keep up with the high energy performances and intense schedule. Speaking candidly on Paul Brunson's podcast We Need To Talk the singer reflected on a terrifying health scare she experienced during her time in the band and her decades long battle with insomnia. She confessed: 'When I my body started shutting down, I thought ok it is time to take a pause.' Explaining how ill she got, the star admitted health professionals feared she had a brain aneurysm after a severe bout of sickness and headaches. 'We were in London doing a gig and I was sick and I was like 'Ok I'm just ill, you know, probably caught something.' 'I was vomiting and had extreme headaches and I'm thinking 'This it isn't getting any better and we I need to get on a flight to Germany .' 'I ended up going to the hospital and they said 'We think you are having a brain aneurysm. So we need you to chill,' and I was like 'Well I need to get on a plane.' 'Then as I am walking to the MRI my knee locks up and turns out I had viral arthritis, I didn't even know this was a thing. So I couldn't bend my knee.' She continued: 'My body was just like stop. I was having some kind of reaction to a virus that I had caught. But I was like the show must go on.' After leaving the group Ashley's health took another knock which she believes to have been caused by intense stress. The star explained: 'There was a literal physical manifestation of stored emotion in my body that has to come somewhere right? 'Unless you have got some sort of release the body is going to try and get it out and I feel like that's what my body was trying to do. 'I had eczema all over my legs, I had a stomach ulcer, I had shingles on my chin. I think stress was at the root from a young age and I was lucky to have performing and dance as an outlet but I think my body had been used to holding stress in.' Nicole Scherzinger There is no denying that Nicole has had the most successful run since the band disbanded, and is now loved-up with her rugby player fiancé Thom Evans. Once upon a time, Nicole was best known for hanging off the arm of Formula One star Lewis Hamilton, from whom she split for good in 2015, following an on-off relationship over several years. But she has proved herself as a global success, scooping victory on Dancing With The Stars in the US, and joining the judging panel on The X Factor UK. Her singing career has continued to blossom, as she reached No.1 in the UK charts for her song Don't Hold Your Breath. More recently, Nicole revealed she has her eyes set on a career in Hollywood after bagging her first Tony Award. She sobbed as she accepted her first ever Broadway honour at the star-studded 78th Annual Tony Awards, held at Radio City Music Hall in New York City. She won the Best Leading Actress in a Musical award, for her performance of fading Hollywood star Norma Desmond in Sunset Boulevard, based on the 1950 film noir of the same name by Billy Wilder. And after selling 55million records sold worldwide with The Pussycat Dolls and now clinching her Broadway gong, Nicole has revealed she now wants to tackle movies. Speaking to The Sun, she said: 'I would like to do movies and movie musicals. I would like to build my own show, there are roles I would like to create.' She added: 'You never know where your unexpected dream opportunity is going to come from.' Kimberly Wyatt Kimberly revealed that her world 'came crashing down' when the Pussycat Dolls reunion was axed, leaving her broke. She married English model Max Rogers in February 2014, and the pair have three children together. The American singer and dancer opened up about how the tour falling through impacted her family life. Speaking on the Mile Fly Club with Laura Hamilton, Kimberly admitted she had cleared her schedule to make way for the reunion - but went into 'panic mode' when it was axed. 'Three young kids, paying school fees and all these things - it changed our world,' she said. 'We've had to rejig our entire life because of it.' Kimberly added: 'You end lots of your work to open all this space to go on the road so when it all comes crashing down it was panic mode.' But Kimberly has become a popular face on British TV since her pop star days. She proved she was a culinary whizz and won the BBC's Celebrity MasterChef series in 2015. She also took part in The Jump, before appearing on the E4 show All Star Driving School. Kimberley then competed in Dancing On Ice in 2022. Now, Kimberly is a presenter on Hits Radio and often DJ's at celebrity events across the UK. Melody Thornton When the band were looking to add some vocal strength and auditioned for new members in 2003, Melody jumped at the chance. The 40-year-old left the group in 2010, saying at the time: 'I got into the group to sing. That was made very clear to me. But it became more and more apparent what was going on. 'Roles were being minimised and minimised, and then by the time it got on the show, it was very much like, 'Y'all play your part and this is what it is'.' Melody went on to bag a cameo in Keri Hilson's music video Slow Dance, as well as releasing her first official single Sweet Vendetta in 2011. She has popped up on several TV shows, including American reality series Bank of Hollywood, and ITV's Dancing On Ice. Melody also competed on ITV's Popstar To Operastar, where she lost out to X Factor's Joe McElderry, and Celebrity Island. When the Dolls were set to reunite in 2019, Melody did not join them with founder Robin Antin saying the time 'wasn't right for her. Jessica Sutta In 2010, Jessica left the Pussycat Dolls to embark on her solo career. The same year, she released her first single I Wanna Be Bad, but it failed to chart anywhere but Slovakia, where it peaked at 65. However, Jessica's second single Show Me gained a bit more success reaching number 1 in the US Billboard charts for Hot Dance Club Songs. Jessica married her husband Mikey Marquet in 2019, who she shares a three-year-old son with. 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To make matters worse, while her fellow Pussycat Dolls former bandmates have been accepting of her experience, she has now been dubbed an anti-vaxxer for speaking out. 'I'm willing to risk my reputation so this doesn't happen to anyone else,' she said. 'There are many people in the industry way, bigger than me with a bigger outreach, with vaccine injuries. But they won't speak out. And for me, I just couldn't hold my tongue.' She added that she does not consider herself anti-vaccine. 'I do believe in the technology in hindsight, right? But I will not blindly trust the medical system ever again after what happened to me. I'm not "anti" anything. I'm just anti being sick,' she said. Carmit Bachar Carmit was one of the main vocalists and was famous before joining the Pussycat Dolls, having previously danced on stage with Beyoncé and was the Vida Loca girl for Ricky Martin. Since quitting the band in 2008, Carmit, 50, has focused on her music career. She formed LadyStation in 2011 and released a single called Body In Motion, and ended 2018 with the release of a new single It's Time. Carmit also collaborated with Macy Gray in 2010 in her album, The Sellout. The redhead, who is mum to daughter Keala Rose, is a passionate campaigner for cleft-palate charities. She suffered from the condition herself as a child.


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