"My dad says 'Take me with you,' but he's our support service": the mother and daughter who serve together in the Khartiia Brigade

Yahoo

28-01-2025

Most Ukrainians are used to their mothers telling them to wear a hat when it's cold and eat plenty of soup. But 21-year-old Mariia's mum had a very different suggestion for her – joining the army together.
Mariia and her family used to live in Lysychansk, Luhansk Oblast. In 2020, Mariia entered the National Guard Academy in Kharkiv, but in 2022 her parents were forced to move to Dnipro due to the full-scale war and the Russian occupation.
In their new home city, Mariia's mother, Olha, found a job as a nurse in a private clinic. But one day she saw an advertisement for military service and decided to change her life dramatically.
Mariia advised her mother to join the 13th Khartiia Brigade of the National Guard of Ukraine. Soon after graduating from the academy, she joined the brigade herself.
Today Olha, 48, is a junior sergeant and a nurse in a mobile dental unit, and Mariia is an officer in Khartiia's personnel department.
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Mariia's older brother also serves as a combat medic in the Armed Forces of Ukraine, and their father, who worked in the State Emergency Service for more than 30 years and has now retired, supports them in the rear.
Ukrainska Pravda.Zhyttia talked to mother and daughter about their "military" upbringing and childhood in Lysychansk, their favourite family service moments, and why recruiting women to the military is so important.
Olha in her mobile dental unit
Photo: Alina Andrieieva for the Khartiia Brigade
Olha devoted over 20 years of her life to working in the maternity ward of a hospital in Lysychansk, Luhansk Oblast.
She started working there as a nurse back in 1994, becoming a senior nurse when the neonatal intensive care unit opened.
Olha cared for generations of newborns, and had it not been for the war, she would never have left.
"I never thought about changing my profession. I really enjoyed working with newborn babies and their mothers," Olha says. "But life turned out in such a way that we left everything behind. Fate decided for us."
Olha and Mariia
Photo: Alina Andrieieva for the Khartiia Brigade
After moving to Dnipro, Olha got a job in a private clinic. At the time, her daughter was a second-year student at the National Guard Academy in Kharkiv, majoring in language support.
One day Olha told her daughter: "I saw an ad [for service in Ukraine's Armed Forces – ed.] in the street, and I want to join the army." Mariia was surprised but supportive, and she advised her mum to join the Khartiia Brigade.
Olha joined the army in December 2023, and in March 2024, her daughter joined her. Only her 60-year-old husband stayed at home.
"My dad says, 'Take me with you, I can't stay at home any longer.' But he is our support. You could say that he works in our supply team: he sends packages, supports us, and visits whenever he gets the chance," Mariia shares.
Olha and Mariia
Photo: Khartiia Brigade
Currently, Mariia heads the personnel department, and Olha is a nurse in a mobile dental clinic where soldiers from the Khartiia Brigade and related units can receive all the dental services that can be provided in the field.
The Khartiia Brigade was the first one to introduce a mobile dental clinic. It's really important, Olha explains, because not all soldiers have the time to go to the city. Moreover, dental treatment is very expensive, but at the mobile clinic, it's completely free for the soldiers.
"Some of the guys who've been serving for three years often don't have the chance to go to the city for treatment. Some soldiers are scared of the dentist, like children. But we quickly establish a rapport.
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What I love most is the support and gratitude I sense from the guys. They bring me little treats, like a chocolate bar or some sweets. Because of my age, I'm like a mother to them. I don't just look after their teeth – I also make them tea and listen to them," Olha says.
Mariia also goes to her mother when she needs dental treatment, but she can't visit her office very often. The two women try to meet whenever they can, at least once a month: they hug, exchange a few words, then quickly go back to their duties.
Mariia and her father
Photo from Mariia's family archive
Mariia grew up in a family with almost military-level physical training: she practised karate, entered competitions, learned archery, and went to English lessons every Sunday at 08:30.
Mariia didn't enjoy martial arts at the time, but now she has no regrets about her parents enrolling her in such a tough sport – it strengthened her character.
"I had a very busy childhood, and sport was always a part of it," Mariia shares. "There was a punching bag, a rope and wall bars in my room. My dad and I played badminton and tennis, and he taught me to ski, skate, and ride a scooter and bicycle. My brother gave me a bow and arrows.
We never sat about at home. Every weekend we'd go somewhere and relax by being active. I smile when I look back on those times."
Mariia and her father
Photo: Mariia's family archive
Olha and her husband tried to raise Mariia without gender stereotypes and encouraged both of their children to be independent, always telling them to be strong.
"My older son still remembers when he was about 10 years old and playing football, and some boy hit him on the ear so hard that it tore a piece of skin off. He came to me and said, 'Mum, my ear got torn off.' And I told him, 'That's okay, we'll just put a plaster on it and everything will be fine.' He's 32 now and he still laughs about that.
Masha started learning English with a tutor when she was three and a half. She did sport as well. I wanted my daughter to be able to stand up for herself, so no one would mess with her later," Olha laughs.
Growing up in this family with a strong, almost military character, Mariia started to think about a military career at a young age. After graduating from the academy, she became the deputy company commander for personnel, later moving into brigade-level management.
Mariia in uniform
Photo: Khartiia Brigade
Mariia is an officer in military discipline analysis and disciplinary breach prevention. She systematises information about disciplinary breaches within the brigade, tries to prevent them, and helps soldiers who have gone AWOL to return to service.
"I deal with everything that is needed to make service members' lives better: I arrange for them to go abroad to improve their skills, organise the awarding of honours, or just go to see them so we can talk about their problems," Mariia says.
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Since Mariia works in a non-combat position, she is not constantly on the line of contact. But she works 24/7. Calls even come in at night, she says.
"There's always a lot to do, because I work with personnel," Mariia shares. "It might be someone calling the hotline because they can't go on leave, another person needing methodological assistance in their work, someone else in need of mental health support.
There are fun tasks as well. For example, we decided to have a real traditional celebration with carolling for our soldiers on Christmas Eve. I arranged it with a group and organised the logistics, and the carol-singers put everyone in a festive mood."
Mariia
Photo: Alina Andreieva for Khartiia Brigade
Like any mother, Olha worries about her daughter, but she never panics. She says she has always tried to give Mariia as much independence as possible.
"We text each other in the morning, and in the evening we might call to say 'Everything's fine, we're all alive and doing well.' No control, no panic. If my mother was constantly calling me, it would be a nightmare – my phone never stops pinging as it is," Mariia says.
Olha admits that the most frightening time for her was at the start of the full-scale war, when Kharkiv was on the brink of occupation and her 18-year-old daughter was hiding from attacks in basements.
"As a mother, of course I worry about my children, but I understand that they wouldn't have stayed at home," Olha says. "My son also serves in the Armed Forces not far from us, defending Kharkiv Oblast. It's the right thing to do right now. I just hope the war will end and everything will be fine."
Mariia
Photo: Alina Andreieva for Khartiia Brigade
Mariia joined a male-dominated unit where everyone was older than her. She had always been the youngest in her class at school and at the academy, so she was prepared to prove her abilities once again. However, she has never encountered sexism in the brigade.
"I've never once regretted joining the military," Mariia says. "Women can and should do it, because firstly, mixed teams work better than all-male or all-female ones. And secondly, it's a challenge – to prove to yourself that you can serve and be useful, not necessarily even in a combat position.
My mum never thought she would serve in the army, but she made it. She helps the guys who come to her saying, 'My toothache was so bad I thought about shooting myself'."
Mariia notes that the Khartiia Brigade's current recruitment campaign is targeting women as well. Women in the brigade hold various positions, from infantry soldiers to section leaders in management. They are now actively recruiting women for newly created units to serve alongside women like Yuliia Paievska (aka Taira).
Mariia and her parents
Photo: the family archive
"We're constantly telling people that we don't just have assault units – there are other interesting areas of activity as well," Mariia says. "Nothing happens without planning, and service members of all levels are involved in that. We also have very good personnel training and quality medical care. Equipment is not as important to us as people are.
Of course, the main problem in the army is the lack of personnel. Because the soldiers are exhausted and suffering physical and mental fatigue from the constant shelling, cases of absence without leave do occur, so personnel rotation is crucial."
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Both mother and daughter plan to continue their service, and they dream of finally gathering together as a family at home after it's over.
"We're internally displaced, we don't have our own housing, so we just want to settle down somewhere after the war," Olha explains. "Our dearest wish is for a peaceful family life."
Translation: Yelyzaveta Khodatska, Tetiana Buchkovska
Editing: Teresa Pearce